What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Welcome to Our Forums. Once you've registered and logged in, you're primed to talk football, among other topics, with the sharpest and most experienced fantasy players on the internet.

**Official 2010 Thanksgiving Grievances** (1 Viewer)

Dr. Gobbler

Footballguy
I was just told that we are having Thanksgiving dinner at my brother in laws house. His wife is the worst ####### cook ever!!! She thinks she's a great cook but all the food is so bland, she has no clue what spices are. So I tell my wife that I'm going to cook a bird and bring it over there so we all have an edible turkey to eat and she told me NO. It seems I'm only allowed to bring over a side dish. Wat??? This is ####### ridiculous!!!! Oh, then she drops the bomb on me that her parents are staying with us Wed-Sunday. I'm so livid!!! I'm going to need two flasks to get through this thanksgiving, one for vodka and one for gravy so I can choke down that sawdust bird that horrible troll of a woman is going to try and serve us!!!!

 
My wife's mom always does Thanksgiving dinner - they're Muslim so she gets Thanksgiving and my mom gets Christmas. Anyway, this year there are going to be approximately 40 people for dinner - all my wife's aunts, uncles, cousins - everyone is coming. It's gonna be a nightmare.

But at leasst the MIL knows how to cook turkey...

 
I try to drink enough beer with dad during the Cowboys game that I can't taste dinner. We used to say "Where there's smoke, there's mom" when I was a kid.

 
My parents are insisting on getting one of the supermarket spreads. So I made my own Thanksgiving dinner on Saturday for me, my wife, and my sister-in-law.

 
Here's a recap of the BEST Thanksgiving our family ever had.

My wife and I live near both our parents, but all our brothers and sisters have moved away. Nearly all Thanksgivings there is something going on "in town", either at one of our parents, with siblings coming from out of town, or at our place with parents.

This one year however, both the parents traveled to be at the homes of their other kids. We we're invited, but traveling with the three kids under 5 in the car is something to be avoided. At the same time my wife did not want to cook an extravegant Thanksgiving dinner for us when in all likely hood the 3 kids would have complained that it's not mac & cheese, pizza, or a hot dog.

So I thought... we need to go out.

Visions of the scene in A Christmas Story where chinese employees are singing "Ra ra ra ra ra... ra ra ra ra" around a roast duck with the head still on filled my mind as I pondered where we could eat out on Thanksgiving. Denny's.... well that's just begging to be a pathetic scene from a Tim Allen movie.

But then it hit me.... full service hotels.... they have decent restaurants... perhaps not five star.... but better than Denny's and the chinese quartet singers.

So I presented the idea to my wife.... Thanksgiving dinner at.... The Marriott!

It worked... we still talk about how great that dinner was.... my wife and I had Turkey and stuffing with all the fixings.... and the kids got their mac & cheese, pizza.... and a corn dog!

We may do it again... soon! Highly recommended.

 
I'm going to need two flasks to get through this thanksgiving, one for vodka and one for gravy so I can choke down that sawdust bird that horrible troll of a woman is going to try and serve us!!!!
PROTIP: it is perfectly acceptable to bring a full bottle of booze to holiday time family functions. Wrap a little ribbon around the neck, hand it to the host when you walk in, then seek out the bottle for use once you have completed your festive salutations.P.S. flasks are always required, even when the full bottle is in play.

 
Last time we had Thanksgiving at my parents, Mom decided to start cooking the frozen turkey the night before. By the time the meal was served, the turkey was crispy on the outside and raw (talking red meat raw) on the inside. There was also some undercooked ham so all in all you pretty much had to avoid any meat products. Not to be impolite we just discretely hid the meat on our kids plates in a napkin and threw it out later. My mom is a saint but can't cook to save her life. Since that time we have always had other plans for Thanksgiving. Yesterday the parents were over for my youngest son's birthday and they mentioned they would be all alone this Thanksgiving (except for my 35 yo leech of a sister that still lives with them). We KNEW they would invite us over...so last night I called them to invite them instead. Mom asked what she could bring...did she need to bring the cooked turkey? I told he dinner rolls would be fine.

 
I was just told that we are having Thanksgiving dinner at my brother in laws house. His wife is the worst ####### cook ever!!! She thinks she's a great cook but all the food is so bland, she has no clue what spices are. So I tell my wife that I'm going to cook a bird and bring it over there so we all have an edible turkey to eat and she told me NO. It seems I'm only allowed to bring over a side dish. Wat??? This is ####### ridiculous!!!! Oh, then she drops the bomb on me that her parents are staying with us Wed-Sunday. I'm so livid!!! I'm going to need two flasks to get through this thanksgiving, one for vodka and one for gravy so I can choke down that sawdust bird that horrible troll of a woman is going to try and serve us!!!!
You pay your bet yet, ****####loser###########breath?

 

Users who are viewing this thread

Top