129 replies to this topic

[offdee]

FOR THE TITLE: Vote will go through Noon CST Friday, Nov. 12th. I'll try to bump as much as needed to keep near page 1.

Llllleeeet's get ready to ruuuuuuummmmbblllllllllee!

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1) Marital Advice- a friendly camping trip

http://forums.footba...x...t=0&start=0

Creator: Man in the yellow hat
Date started: July 2007
Total pages: 73
Total posts: 3,613

Post #1 that started it all:
I'm going to try to keep this short sweet, but since I'm thinking about this and can't sleep, here goes.

Every year, some friends organize a camping trip for a whole group of people. These are former college roomates and their significant others, most of whom we've known for close to ten years. This year's event happened over the weekend.

Some backstory. I started my freshman year in college when I was twenty after taking a few years off. My now wife was friends with some of the guys I ended up living with when I arrived. We'll call one of these guys 'Steve'. I got to know Steve through some of my close friends, and I ended living with him for two years. Now, Steve was a nice enough guy, but he was a bit of a player. The opposite of me in that respect. I had my share of girl's I dated, but I was pretty low key when it came to hitting on women.

Steve started dating his current wife about 6 months after I started dating my wife. We hung out quite a bit during our college years. Now, Steve is a nice guy, but he wasn't exactly faithful while dating this girl. My wife isn't aware of his indiscretions, and it's not my place to fill her in. In any case, I know the guy isn't one to turn down a free offer.

Fast forward a few years. As husbands and wives sometimes do, my wife and I started having a discussion about college, and she told me that she had a huge crush on Steve before I met my wife. I wasn't really surprised by this, as they were kind of flirty. It never really bothered me though.

Fast forward to last weekend's camping trip. Steve was there, along with many other friends and their significant others. This grouip always gets goofy when we get together, and joke about swapping wives and stuff. I never take any of it too seriously, and flirting is all in good fun. Friday night we all had our kids with us, but on Saturday, we all handed them off to grandparents, who all happened to live near the camping area. Our kid exchange didn't go all that smooth, as one of our boys was feeling a little sick Saturday morning. So, my wife and I were both stressed out. When we got back to the campground, my wife had her first drink. This was around 3. We ended up playing beach volleyball for a while, and then things start getting fuzzy for me.

Somewhere between about 9 and 1 a.m., we ended up back at the campsite. I distincly remember three of the guys, inclusing Steve announcing they had to walk to the bathroom. I also remembr my wife saying 'me too' and walking with them toward the bathrooms. Five or so minutes later, two of the guys came back. One of them, we'll call him 'George' told me "Hey, you should go check on your wife, she went into the same stall as Steve". I laughed, because we're always doing goofy things like that to each other. Another 15 minutes or so (having a hard time with time) went by, and George looked and me and said "Dude, seriously. Where are those two? They went into the same stall together." I wondered about it, but again, played it off. A few minutes later, they came walking back to the site together. George asked them what was going on and Steve just laughed. I laughed it off, but now some pieces are starting to come together for me.

Later that night, my wife wasn't feeling well, as she drank way too much. She walked up to the bathroom, and walked up a few minutes later to check on her. She was doing OK, but wanted to walk back to the campsite. As she walked out of the bathroom, she said "Hey, my #### are haning out of my bra." I asked how that happened, and she had no idea. Me being drunk and horny, I reach under her shirt and her bra is still fastned, but her breasts are out. Not easy to do with a big chest, so cleary she or someone else helped take those out.

I laughed that off as well, until I started thinking about this yesterday. Last night, I brought this series of events up to my wife, and she does not remember any of it. She remebers things from the night, but does not remember going into the stall with the guy, nor does she remember anything happening. She kind of freaked out about this, and I certainly wish I'd have listned to George and walked to the bathroom to check on them.

Quite honestly, this all does not sit well with me today, which is why I can't sleep. So, what's my next move?


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2) Ceiling Pooper

http://forums.footba...howtopic=134948

Creator: Evilgrin72
Date started: December 2004
Total pages: 18
Total posts: 884

Post #1 that started it all:
Got into work this morning and the vestibule smelled so badly of crap, I thought I was going to throw up. I came inside and everyone was burning scented candles to fend off the putrid aroma. I asked what the hell was going on and was told the stink was coming through the air vents.

I quickly rounded up the head of maintenance and asked him to locate the source of the problem. President of the company thought it was a dead animal in the A/C system, but I suspected otherwise.

Sure enough, after a few minutes, the guy locates the source of the problem. Someone had s--t their pants, taken the heavily soiled boxer briefs, and PUT THEM IN THE CEILING. That's right, the perpetrator stood on the toilet, slid a ceiling tile out of the way, tossed the underpants up there, and replaced the tile. This festered all weekend.

We have a suspect. Some of you may remember a previous thread where I mentioned we had an employee who was, for some reason, wiping himself after defacating, and throwing the TP in the trash can rather than into the toilet. Maintenance yelled at me daily about this, but without evidence on one person, what can you do?

However, I have to do something about this. The evidence I have against this one guy is as follows :

1) He is relatively new. He has been here 3 months, and we never had problems before that. However, there is building construction going on and a lot of contractors, plumbers, etc in the building over that time as well, so this is not iron-clad proof.

2) One of the maintenance guys swears it's him. Says he saw the kid leaving the bathroom once, went in, and found soiled TP in the garbage. Again, circumstantial evidence.

3) The soiled underwear were size 32/34. There are about 25 men working in this building, and only about 4 or so would even fit into those undies. The suspect is one of them.

Is this enough evidence to warrant confrontation? I cannot allow this to continue....

[Zow]

To me, the Man in the Yellow Hat's camping story and the posts is a microcosm of the FFA. Guy has shticky uncertainties, and the responses range from comical to mean mostly underthe guise that he is cheating. I would imagine, shortly after starting the guy, MITYH immediately regretted his decision - but at that point the thread took on a life of it's own and he couldn't help but update it.

Gets my vote easily.

[Das Boot]

The one that really happened gets my vote.

GB Clyde.

[Tom Servo]

Ceiling pooper FTW.

[rascal]

Ceiling Pooper.

Marital Advice started out better, but fell apart, and lost it's luster.

[Leroy Hoard]

Nothing beats poop.

[Tiny Dancer]

Nothing beats poop.

If I recall correctly, the marital advice thread also starts in a bathroom. Someone may have been pooping.

[PatsFanCT]

The camping trip for sure. Hell, it ends with a pregnancy and paternity test requests.

[IvanKaramazov]

Camping trip for sure.

[offdee]

24 to 29. Close one so far.

[Leroy Hoard]

Nothing beats poop.

If I recall correctly, the marital advice thread also starts in a bathroom. Someone may have been pooping.

But I also suspect the ceiling pooper has had marital problems.

[Billy Costigan Jr]

I love the Marital Advice thread, but to be honest, I still haven't voted in that stupid pole, so I refuse, on principle, to vote for that thread here.

Not to take anything away from the ceiling poop thread...it's not winning by default ... in fact...we're all winners!

[Billy Costigan Jr]

Nothing beats poop.

If I recall correctly, the marital advice thread also starts in a bathroom. Someone may have been pooping.

% chance of somebody pooping in that bathroom stall...


Zero.

Point.

Zero.

[offdee]

I love the Marital Advice thread, but to be honest, I still haven't voted in that stupid pole

Majority ruled...."Go to counseling"

[Tiny Dancer]

Nothing beats poop.

If I recall correctly, the marital advice thread also starts in a bathroom. Someone may have been pooping.

% chance of somebody pooping in that bathroom stall...


Zero.

Point.

Zero.

I've seen stuff like it on the internet.

[Billy Costigan Jr]

I love the Marital Advice thread, but to be honest, I still haven't voted in that stupid pole

Majority ruled...."Go to counseling"

[Vader scream]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

[/Vader scream]


[Southpark]

You bastard!

[/Southpark]

[Das Boot]

I'm glad to see that when the rubber meets the road:

Reality >>>

[Jobber]

I voted Clyde. What puts that one over the top was the realtime updates provided for the FFA.

That thread is responsible for wearing out a lot of F5 keys across the country.

[Billy Costigan Jr]

I'm glad to see that when the rubber meets the road:

Reality >>>

That doesn't make sense...EG's thread is winning.

[BassNBrew]

Better story - Ceiling pooper

Better author - EG

[Masked Vigilante]

Better story - Ceiling pooper

Better author - EG

But the other story had the happy ending.

[Satchel's Cat]

Ceiling pooper for this simple reason:

"You let him reload?!?!?"

(or something very close to that)

Edited by Satchel's Cat, 09 November 2010 - 01:57 PM.

[flufhed]

I voted Clyde. What puts that one over the top was the realtime updates provided for the FFA.

That thread is responsible for wearing out a lot of F5 keys across the country.

Wasn't that also the thread where someone posted in another thread that the poop story was being updated?

Love LOVED MITYH saga, but when you are having cross-thread updates, then you really have something.

Not to mention the birth of a new smilie, plus other boards running with the "story."

Poop story was epic as it was happeneing.

[Insein]

Just read both. By far the ceiling pooper. I havent laughed that hard in a while from a message board thread. The other left me kind of frustrated at the unresolved issue. No closure.

[Dr. No]

does the camping trip thread lead to cory the bartender at the bowling alley? or are those separate threads?

[flufhed]

Another factor that should be considered is that at some point the camping trip thread felt a bit like it was trying too hard.

Poop story sustained itself nicely.

[Das Boot]

I'm glad to see that when the rubber meets the road:

Reality >>>

That doesn't make sense...EG's thread is winning.

Clyde happened.

Steve didn't.

IMHO.

[IvanKaramazov]

Better author - EG

This is why I voted for Camping Trip. Ceiling Pooper was awesome -- I don't know how I missed that thread. But it was almost completely reliant on EG's story-telling. Take EG out of the equation and it's just another good Friday thread. Camping Trip has more high-quality involvement from more posters without relying on the OP to carry the thread.

[Masked Vigilante]

Better author - EG

This is why I voted for Camping Trip. Ceiling Pooper was awesome -- I don't know how I missed that thread. But it was almost completely reliant on EG's story-telling. Take EG out of the equation and it's just another good Friday thread. Camping Trip has more high-quality involvement from more posters without relying on the OP to carry the thread.

Are you one of those guys who discounts a runningback's longest runs when looking at YPC?

[slayer666]

Poop in a mudslide.

[IvanKaramazov]

Better author - EG

This is why I voted for Camping Trip. Ceiling Pooper was awesome -- I don't know how I missed that thread. But it was almost completely reliant on EG's story-telling. Take EG out of the equation and it's just another good Friday thread. Camping Trip has more high-quality involvement from more posters without relying on the OP to carry the thread.

Are you one of those guys who discounts a runningback's longest runs when looking at YPC?

Nope. Ceiling Pooper is top-tier regardless. This is a great match-up that we all knew was coming, and you have to decide how to vote somehow.

[Mad Cow]

Camping really draws you in. Starts out breezy, a whimsical yarn about years gone by. Then, you become emotionally invested when George tells MITYH to check on his wife. Tensions are so high by the time George again tells him to check on her that you are worried about our dear MITYH. He eases that tension back a bit as he muses about feeling up his wife's massive breasts, but when all is said and done, the reader is left with a hollow feeling, as if that last bit of innocence in Anywhere, USA is gone forever, and in the back of your mind, you want Steve to pay for his indiscretion. Bravo, MITYH. Bravo!

[TLEF316]

Both are tremendous. Going with EG and the ceiling pooper though.

I just can't vote against Clyde.

[CGRdrJoe]

Neither of these come close to KidC (posting as AC repair man) and his tap a chick with a slight moustache thread

[Michael Brown]

[Das Boot]

[dharmapunk]

Both are tremendous. Going with EG and the ceiling pooper though.

I just can't vote against Clyde.

[TLEF316]

just re-read the Clyde thread. Still amazing, but its frustrating because you don't get the full effect due to all the broken links from 6 years ago.

Thankfully, the Clyde picture on page 15 still works.

I remember when i first read it. I was interning at my dad's insurance agency between semesters my junior year of college. I was supposed to be working on this big spreadsheet of customer files were were sending for archiving. Needless to say, that project fell a bit behind schedule that day.

Edited by TLEF316, 09 November 2010 - 05:29 PM.

[offdee]

64 to 70

[BassNBrew]

Better author - EG

This is why I voted for Camping Trip. Ceiling Pooper was awesome -- I don't know how I missed that thread. But it was almost completely reliant on EG's story-telling. Take EG out of the equation and it's just another good Friday thread. Camping Trip has more high-quality involvement from more posters without relying on the OP to carry the thread.

Then you shold have voted for "What kind of Beer are you drinking tonite" or one of Timmy's 60 round all time drafts.

We get a cheating wife thread every other week around here...janitors handing out wedgies and poop in the ceiling is a rare stuff.

[Wooderson]

Clyde the Glide

He has his own smile guy.

[Drunken Cowboy]

I have not really been following this, but how did Vivian Darkbloom's colon blow thread not win not win?

[Fennis]

I have not really been following this, but how did Vivian Darkbloom's colon blow thread not win not win?

It lost to the P90X - Anyone try this? thread.

[Tom Servo]

Championship
#1: Marital Advice, a friendly camping trip [ 75 ]   [50.00%] 
#2: Ceiling Pooper [ 75 ]   [50.00%]

C'mon poop!!!!

[KnowledgeReignsSupreme]

I have not really been following this, but how did Vivian Darkbloom's colon blow thread not win not win?

Because it was terrible.

[Sheriff66]

Ceiling Pooper, hands down

[Leroy Hoard]

Ceiling Pooper, hands down

Shouldn't that be hands up?

[Sheriff66]

Ceiling Pooper, hands down

Shouldn't that be hands up?

I stand corrected

[Fennis]

Ceiling Pooper, hands down

Shouldn't that be hands up?

I stand corrected

shouldn't that be sit?

[flufhed]

I have not really been following this, but how did Vivian Darkbloom's colon blow thread not win not win?

It lost to the P90X - Anyone try this? thread.

Serious? Is that thread worth reading?