General Malaise

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About General Malaise

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    Poop Lord
  • Birthday January 12

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  • Favorite NFL Team
    Dallas Cowboys

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  1. Went there in 2007 with Jefferson The Caregiver. Did a VIP seating on a Friday and helped a few really good looking sorority girls handicap races. Such an awesome day. Then on Saturday we sat outside in the woods and there was a chili cook off going on. Normally crowds at horse tracks can be a little on the low rent side; not the case here. Felt like we were hanging around people who were vacationing in the Hamptons. Great vibe, so much fun. Been to a lot of sporting events in my life, including a Rose Bowl and a NCAA Championship Game. Saratoga tops all for me and one day I hope to go back.
  2. You're traveling for a preseason game? Has that ever happened before in history?
  3. In-laws dog has been playing frisbee all morning. What a good little stoner.
  4. This sounds eerily like a true story...
  5. No. They won't let me pay, but when I get home I'm sending them a check with an apology letter. I have to sell some stocks first, but this is all my fault and I need to own it. Made for one hell of a story at the bachelor party last night. Most of the guys are bummed they didnt get a cookie. Cemented myself as the jackass of the family, as if that legacy weren't already in place.
  6. Maggie is coming home! With a vet bill just south of $2,000. Vacation!
  7. Rochester Tap Room for a bachelor party tonight. lovely weather you have here. Suffocating humidity paired with an abundance of mosquitos. In-laws jack russell got into my bag last night while we were at dinner. She found my stash of pot cookies and tore into them. Not sure how many she had, but they had to take her to the vet hospital this morning because she couldn't walk. Will be there overnight. All my wife's girl cousins came over today and now, the entire crew know I almost - and still might have - killed their beloved dog. Oh, and I left my laptop at the Portland Airport. Whose the world's biggest ##### bag? Leader in the club house typing here.
  8. No chance here. I have to stop at Caribbean Jerk at BWW. That's as hot as I can go. Concede that one to Captain Ramius.
  9. Yeah, but at least she's cool and desirable. Evan kissed a girl who promptly barfed.
  10. Right, I think all of them are actors anyway, but in the event they're even remotely real, he's getting clowned on in pretty cruel fashion.
  11. Is that legal? I'm asking for a friend. A friend with 5 kids, a couple of them nearing the age of 15. This friend prefers his drinks to go down like a fresh out of the oven corn-dog.
  12. I knew - KNEW - this was coming.