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About AndrewClark

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  1. Also thank you to @Joe Bryant for allowing this to take place here in your site. You are a gracious man and I'm privileged to be able to tell my story here.
  2. The season 1 scene w the sister was even a bit disturbing for me and not much disturbs me. I think you know the scene I'm talking about.
  3. I think you put this better than I did and I really appreciate it. I guess I was too subtle about being succesful in life and having wanderlust/being active and outwardly happy. For every destitute poor soul hooked on drugs there is an Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade. None of my success in life mattered in those moments. None of it. I just need to talk to someone. That's it, you could take my house, my car and all my money because zero of that mattered to me in those 2 moments. I just needed to talk. Thank you for putting it more directly than I could. Also remember, I felt for a long time I did NOT want to talk because I felt like a burden to other people especially my closest friends . I didn't want them to have to worry about my manic episode when they had their own crap to deal with. And that is exactly why, having someone you hardly know to talk to was soooooo important to me. I didn't want to call a family member or friend because I didn't want to burden them. That is why we sometimes just need a stranger to talk to.
  4. Both seasons? I loved the Cora season. But you're correct, it's really disturbing.
  5. I attempted suicide about 4 months ago now. I went through a brutal divorce. One that completely blindsided me due to her infidelity. I was in therapy and medicated for the past 2 years just to help mask a lot of pain. I retired in February at a younger age (37) with the dream of seeing the rest of the world. I had an open ended ticket booked starting in Sweden. About a week into my trip, I was ordered by the President to basically come home or face uncertain reentry into the US. So for the past 6 months, I sit here, doing nothing, in my house with no ability to socialize or volunteer or even find work again due to unemployment. It began to fester... I hit the bottle hard and began lashing out at people for no reason. Saying words that were hurtful. I'm going to tell you this next part, but I really hope you folks will not judge me for it. One night I use a slur for a gay person after struggling with some family issues. That being: my youngest brother (who is gay) is being pressured/bullied by our other brother and father about it. That younger brother recently attempted suicide also. I don't know why I used the word. I am and was extremely pro LGBTQ rights. I thought it was funny in the context? I was drunk? it's not funny and it had never come out of my mouth before. I felt so ashamed by it (it was in front of 7 close friends) I took a bottle of one of my prescriptions in hopes not to wake up the next morning out of shame. Turns out I just slept for 3 days and only was woken up when my dog knew something was seriously wrong. Anyway, I completed 30 days of inpatient care for mental health which really turned things around. I avoided alcohol completely (90 days without it), said my apologies and got back to a good spot where I feel like I've never been happier. Why am I saying this? There was a moment before this where I was also contemplating ending it in a more violent and assured way and none of my network was available to talk and I needed to talk immediately. I went to my 4th and 5th option. It got to the point where I just needed someone on the phone (I live alone). I got someone on the phone and it literally saved my life. Someone I'd never talked to before. I remember just sitting in my car for hours with a weapon, bawling and listening to George Harrison on repeat. Then I remember getting the call from the person in the knick of time. That call saved my life. I only know her through the internet. That's it, I found her Facebook and asked for 10 mins of her time and said it was an emergency. I'll never forget that call. If anyone ever feels that way, reach out to me. I don't mind being a 6th option. Thanks for reading my story and also sorry to anyone here I may have said something to that bothered them. I stand humbled and a different person.
  6. I cancelled Netflix yesterday. I have no cable so I've been through almost everything there and there's not much groundbreaking right now in their library. I have a lot of 12 Harlan Coben books coming from Amazon and once I get through those, will assess which streaming options there are.
  7. The characters really make the show. Which is why some are put off and never even watch it that appears to revolve around MMA. The MMA is no different than a marketing agency in making Mad Men great. However, your point is definitely well taken on the cocaine thing. For some reason I never thought of it nor do I feel the same but Im glad you're enjoying it.
  8. Mumble Rap warning (this is a year old) but I love this video Quality Control, Lil Baby, & DaBaby - "Baby" (Official Music Video)
  9. I love Mafia documentaries, but so much of the material has been done over and over that I've stopped being interested in them. Feel like I know as much as I'm ever going to know at this point. What I'd like to see is an ongoing series of the Mafia today. The names are out there, we know who they are, etc. Should be able to put something together on the modern day Mafia structure and key players, including ongoing cases. Because I live in a hot bed area, the local news covers Mafia related stories a few times a month.
  10. The first 4 books of Wot were great. There is no shame in tapping out at book 8 my friend. The middle 500 books get so tedious.
  11. For the record, even though I had a ticket I made in May, I don't think DeChambeau is a horse for Augusta's course. He thrives on his strength and destroying errant drives out of the rough, but Augusta, IMO, it's not really known for overgrown and difficult rough. Being strong doesn't help you get out of the thicket of a small forest of trees. Winged Foot was perfect for him. He's a talented golfer and a top 10 wouldn't shock me, but I'm not laying money at this point on Bryson. Ancer is the answer.
  12. The tasks essentially get you to "night mode" but also act as a way to figure out imposters because they can't do the tasks they can only pretend to. You are 100 percent spot on, it's basically digital werewolf. It's actually super fun but really not great unless you have at least 6 people. So just trying to build a consensus Eta: it's also way funner to play w the same people so you get to know each others tendencies. Also similar to werewolf. The game costs 5 bucks. If we can get Nick and 1 or 2 others we might be OK to try it out
  13. Jesus. So this is basically Wheel of Time level of commitment?