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Trouble getting pregnant? (1 Viewer)

Since this was bumped I'll update that we're trying again for in vitro in about a month. Probably our last attempt. Starting to come to grips with the fact that maybe I'm just not meant to have kids :(
sorry to hear things aren't going as hoped, NB :(

GL with the next round- I"ll have my monster-headed sperm cross all their misshapen digits for you.

is adoption or other alternatives (surrogate, sex with hookers in parking lots, etc) off the table?

 
Since this was bumped I'll update that we're trying again for in vitro in about a month. Probably our last attempt. Starting to come to grips with the fact that maybe I'm just not meant to have kids :(
sorry to hear things aren't going as hoped, NB :(

GL with the next round- I"ll have my monster-headed sperm cross all their misshapen digits for you.

is adoption or other alternatives (surrogate, sex with hookers in parking lots, etc) off the table?
Wait this was an option???

 
Since this was bumped I'll update that we're trying again for in vitro in about a month. Probably our last attempt. Starting to come to grips with the fact that maybe I'm just not meant to have kids :(
sorry to hear things aren't going as hoped, NB :(

GL with the next round- I"ll have my monster-headed sperm cross all their misshapen digits for you.

is adoption or other alternatives (surrogate, sex with hookers in parking lots, etc) off the table?
Wait this was an option???
pretty sure :oldunsure:

 
Since this was bumped I'll update that we're trying again for in vitro in about a month. Probably our last attempt. Starting to come to grips with the fact that maybe I'm just not meant to have kids :(
sorry to hear things aren't going as hoped, NB :(

GL with the next round- I"ll have my monster-headed sperm cross all their misshapen digits for you.

is adoption or other alternatives (surrogate, sex with hookers in parking lots, etc) off the table?
Wait this was an option???
Thanks for the much needed laugh. I guess other options are on the table but we haven't really looked into adoption. We're not married so I think it's tougher.

 
In the office now. They took just her back for now.

So I have about fifteen minutes left of freedom for the rest of my life. Make a run for it?

 
In the office now. They took just her back for

now.

So I have about fifteen minutes left of freedom for the rest of my life. Make a run for it?
Excuse my ignorance, but how long until you guys know for sure if it's taken and she's now pregnant?
We come back for an ultrasound and test in ten days. Will know for sure then.
 
In the office now. They took just her back for

now.

So I have about fifteen minutes left of freedom for the rest of my life. Make a run for it?
Excuse my ignorance, but how long until you guys know for sure if it's taken and she's now pregnant?
We come back for an ultrasound and test in ten days. Will know for sure then.
they aren't even offering up the wank room while you wait?

 
I asked to go in there. No shtick.

Nurse laughed but denied me. Still seated in the damn lobby.

 
One embryo implanted. Doctor said it went perfectly.

The miracle of pregnancy where you sit and watch another man shove stuff up your wife and pay him for it!

 
One embryo implanted. Doctor said it went perfectly.

The miracle of pregnancy where you sit and watch another man shove stuff up your wife and pay him for it!
Keep her relaxed and full of positive thoughts. Avoid the temptation of home pregnancy tests.

 
Wooderson said:
Zow said:
One embryo implanted. Doctor said it went perfectly.

The miracle of pregnancy where you sit and watch another man shove stuff up your wife and pay him for it!
Keep her relaxed and full of positive thoughts. Avoid the temptation of home pregnancy tests.
Currently working on this. The mother in law, who is staying with us for a week's period of so, is not helping. She wants to go buy a home pregnancy test right away.

 
Wooderson said:
Zow said:
One embryo implanted. Doctor said it went perfectly.

The miracle of pregnancy where you sit and watch another man shove stuff up your wife and pay him for it!
Keep her relaxed and full of positive thoughts. Avoid the temptation of home pregnancy tests.
Currently working on this. The mother in law, who is staying with us for a week's period of so, is not helping. She wants to go buy a home pregnancy test right away.
In-Laws were banned from our house or any other contact until the utlrasound....no shtick.

 
Wooderson said:
Zow said:
One embryo implanted. Doctor said it went perfectly.

The miracle of pregnancy where you sit and watch another man shove stuff up your wife and pay him for it!
Keep her relaxed and full of positive thoughts. Avoid the temptation of home pregnancy tests.
Currently working on this. The mother in law, who is staying with us for a week's period of so, is not helping. She wants to go buy a home pregnancy test right away.
In-Laws were banned from our house or any other contact until the utlrasound....no shtick.
My mother in law is an exception here. She's super helpful to the extent that she is very interested and my wife feels better when she's there. Her being there also allows me to focus on work and permit me to keep making the money necessary to go on with this endeavor. And I'm free to play golf tomorrow too because MIL will be there to hang out with my wife.

That said, when it's the three of us I basically just become their lackey and have to play the bad guy when they both make absolutely ridiculous suggestions of things to do (i.e., just these past couple of days it was suggested we get a hotel right next to the facility "just in case", we go to Disneyland, we get a ton of EPT tests, we start organizing the baby's room, we consider two embryos to get twins, we go to one place for breakfast and another for coffee, etc.). Money isn't exactly a focus and that's still a major stressor for me with this whole endeavor.* There's also the whole constantly update every other family member via when we are either driving or eating. To the extent that both my wife and my MIL will call the same person back to back.

But, again, my wife really appreciates her there and she definitely means well. So it's a good thing.

* The ####### receptionist just nonchalantly drops info on us yesterday that they're requiring the ultrasounds done by the fertility doctor and that's out of network so it'll be about another grand. This is despite me getting their assurances there'd be no out of pocket expenses to them. But apparently this is an "after pregnancy" thing and clearly they didn't mean after pregnancy stuff. :hot:

 
Update: went for confirmatory blood test yesterday. Got a call a few hours later indicating that the test was slightly positive but the embryo may not have taken. Wife is crushed, but we go back tomorrow. This whole process just sucks.

 
Update: went for confirmatory blood test yesterday. Got a call a few hours later indicating that the test was slightly positive but the embryo may not have taken. Wife is crushed, but we go back tomorrow. This whole process just sucks.
aww man, hope we get some better news tomorrow. Keep the faith :thumbup:

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her
:goodposting:

And it's good that you're there to pump the breaks on the "ideas" you referenced above. I would avoid (as much as possible) any sort of "look ahead" projects. Like creating a nursery for example.

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her
:goodposting: And it's good that you're there to pump the breaks on the "ideas" you referenced above. I would avoid (as much as possible) any sort of "look ahead" projects. Like creating a nursery for example.
Good post. We made the mistake of buying a stroller before we were successful. Was not a fun day selling the stroller at a second hand store after a miscarriage. Store full of parents I'm selling an unused stroller while my wife sits in the car.

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her
:goodposting: And it's good that you're there to pump the breaks on the "ideas" you referenced above. I would avoid (as much as possible) any sort of "look ahead" projects. Like creating a nursery for example.
Good post. We made the mistake of buying a stroller before we were successful. Was not a fun day selling the stroller at a second hand store after a miscarriage. Store full of parents I'm selling an unused stroller while my wife sits in the car.
ugh....that'd suck. It's not fun being the wet blanket (while in the moment) but it helps should problems arise somewhere in the process.

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her
:goodposting: And it's good that you're there to pump the breaks on the "ideas" you referenced above. I would avoid (as much as possible) any sort of "look ahead" projects. Like creating a nursery for example.
Good post. We made the mistake of buying a stroller before we were successful. Was not a fun day selling the stroller at a second hand store after a miscarriage. Store full of parents I'm selling an unused stroller while my wife sits in the car.
I believe it. I've tried to fight as subtly hard as I can but my wife's family keep giving us old stuff or selling things to us on the cheap. I've asked my brothers in law to see if they could help me stop it somehow, but my wife's sister, SIL, and mother are so into the idea and promoted it so much that we now have a room full of items and clothes (for both genders) and several large pieces (some fancy crib/bed thing, two fancy strollers, pack in plays, etc) that we owe like a grand to people for. I tried to stop it solely out of fear that we may have to give it back on day but was unsuccessful. God forbid this process doesn't work and we do have to give it all back.

 
Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her
:goodposting: And it's good that you're there to pump the breaks on the "ideas" you referenced above. I would avoid (as much as possible) any sort of "look ahead" projects. Like creating a nursery for example.
Good post. We made the mistake of buying a stroller before we were successful. Was not a fun day selling the stroller at a second hand store after a miscarriage. Store full of parents I'm selling an unused stroller while my wife sits in the car.
I believe it. I've tried to fight as subtly hard as I can but my wife's family keep giving us old stuff or selling things to us on the cheap. I've asked my brothers in law to see if they could help me stop it somehow, but my wife's sister, SIL, and mother are so into the idea and promoted it so much that we now have a room full of items and clothes (for both genders) and several large pieces (some fancy crib/bed thing, two fancy strollers, pack in plays, etc) that we owe like a grand to people for. I tried to stop it solely out of fear that we may have to give it back on day but was unsuccessful. God forbid this process doesn't work and we do have to give it all back.
oh man...that's got to be rough to look at that everyday

 
Yeah, I bought my wife a gift certificate for a "pregnancy massage" the first time she got pregnant. After she miscarried, the place actually initially told me I couldn't get a refund -- I had to write an email to the manager explaining everything before they would give us our money back. It sucked.

Most people who haven't been through infertility seem to have trouble grasping the enormity of how tough it can be. I think because most people suffer in silence so there aren't a lot of outward signs of how awful it can be.

 
Have our first round of IUI after her current period is over.

Best of luck to woz, hoping for good news.

 
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Thanks guys. Just frustrating knowing you can't control anything. Doctor suggests to try not to stress out, which gives my wife one more thing to stress out about. She pretty much hates life right now. Which means I get to temporarily hate life as well since the right thing to do is be at home but being at home is no fun.
yeah, i think everyone in this thread can relate. there really isn't any silver bullet advice other than to be there for her
:goodposting: And it's good that you're there to pump the breaks on the "ideas" you referenced above. I would avoid (as much as possible) any sort of "look ahead" projects. Like creating a nursery for example.
Good post. We made the mistake of buying a stroller before we were successful. Was not a fun day selling the stroller at a second hand store after a miscarriage. Store full of parents I'm selling an unused stroller while my wife sits in the car.
I believe it. I've tried to fight as subtly hard as I can but my wife's family keep giving us old stuff or selling things to us on the cheap. I've asked my brothers in law to see if they could help me stop it somehow, but my wife's sister, SIL, and mother are so into the idea and promoted it so much that we now have a room full of items and clothes (for both genders) and several large pieces (some fancy crib/bed thing, two fancy strollers, pack in plays, etc) that we owe like a grand to people for. I tried to stop it solely out of fear that we may have to give it back on day but was unsuccessful. God forbid this process doesn't work and we do have to give it all back.
oh man...that's got to be rough to look at that everyday
rough.

I know everybody means well... but who the hell buys gifts for babies that don't exist? pretty messed up or frighteningly oblivious.

even with natural child-production, isn't it well understood to wait until the 2nd trimester before even telling people about being pregnant, let alone buying/giving kid stuff to somebody?

how did the rest of you guys do it? We told our immediate families and friends that we were trying through fertility docs... but we waited until month 4 of pregnancy before telling anybody squat. and it was obvious to our people not to get the couple going through fertility anything until given the say-so.

 
how did the rest of you guys do it? We told our immediate families and friends that we were trying through fertility docs... but we waited until month 4 of pregnancy before telling anybody squat. and it was obvious to our people not to get the couple going through fertility anything until given the say-so.
Yeah, very few people knew what we were doing, mostly just our immediate families. Co-workers may have suspected it due to frequent doctor's appointments but as far as I know nobody asked my wife directly.
 
We told our family after the end of the first trimester. I'm pretty sure we didn't buy a thing for the baby until well into the 2nd trimester (or maybe even 3rd).

 
Sorry Woz but I still like your odds before all is said and done. :shrug:
I do too. We have three other chances.

I'm more so just dreading the inevitable let down and temporary depression it'll send my wife into.

She wants a baby so badly. She thinks about nothing else and stresses about it every second. To the point where I'm legitimately concerned that her stress is possibly messing with her hormones and lowering our chances. But of course I cannot really say that to her so I sit by.

 
As for people we've told we have probably told more than most. We told our immediate families who then told our extended families. Both our employers know. A good chunk of our friends know as well because we've missed events due to being in vegas for appointments. Plus every single one of our damn friends are spitting out babies like irish catholics so since baby talk is so prominent it just naturally comes up.

 
Oof. Just looked at the clock. She's probably going to be getting a call anytime now with the results of this morning's blood test. And I'm likely stuck in the office until relatively late tonight.

 
As for people we've told we have probably told more than most. We told our immediate families who then told our extended families. Both our employers know. A good chunk of our friends know as well because we've missed events due to being in vegas for appointments. Plus every single one of our damn friends are spitting out babies like irish catholics so since baby talk is so prominent it just naturally comes up.
I'm going to throw this out there for you. Your wife sounds a lot like mine (though we had to do IVF for the second child, so it's a little different) but my wife found a acupuncturist who specialized in fertility. Now, I'm not saying it works or there is proven science to it, but what it DID provide was some psychological relief and helped with the stress. It wasn't more than a massage at most places. Might want to look into it if it's something you think might help her.

 
As for people we've told we have probably told more than most. We told our immediate families who then told our extended families. Both our employers know. A good chunk of our friends know as well because we've missed events due to being in vegas for appointments. Plus every single one of our damn friends are spitting out babies like irish catholics so since baby talk is so prominent it just naturally comes up.
I'm going to throw this out there for you. Your wife sounds a lot like mine (though we had to do IVF for the second child, so it's a little different) but my wife found a acupuncturist who specialized in fertility. Now, I'm not saying it works or there is proven science to it, but what it DID provide was some psychological relief and helped with the stress. It wasn't more than a massage at most places. Might want to look into it if it's something you think might help her.
I'll look into anything at this point. Thanks.

 
The Commish said:
Zow said:
As for people we've told we have probably told more than most. We told our immediate families who then told our extended families. Both our employers know. A good chunk of our friends know as well because we've missed events due to being in vegas for appointments. Plus every single one of our damn friends are spitting out babies like irish catholics so since baby talk is so prominent it just naturally comes up.
I'm going to throw this out there for you. Your wife sounds a lot like mine (though we had to do IVF for the second child, so it's a little different) but my wife found a acupuncturist who specialized in fertility. Now, I'm not saying it works or there is proven science to it, but what it DID provide was some psychological relief and helped with the stress. It wasn't more than a massage at most places. Might want to look into it if it's something you think might help her.
My wife did this as well and she sounds a lot like Woz's wife. It worked wonders for her psyche.

 
Lost it. Wife advised to stop all meds and we'll have a consult at the end of the month.

Tonight is going to be rough.

 
The Commish said:
Zow said:
As for people we've told we have probably told more than most. We told our immediate families who then told our extended families. Both our employers know. A good chunk of our friends know as well because we've missed events due to being in vegas for appointments. Plus every single one of our damn friends are spitting out babies like irish catholics so since baby talk is so prominent it just naturally comes up.
I'm going to throw this out there for you. Your wife sounds a lot like mine (though we had to do IVF for the second child, so it's a little different) but my wife found a acupuncturist who specialized in fertility. Now, I'm not saying it works or there is proven science to it, but what it DID provide was some psychological relief and helped with the stress. It wasn't more than a massage at most places. Might want to look into it if it's something you think might help her.
My wife did this as well and she sounds a lot like Woz's wife. It worked wonders for her psyche.
My wife as well. We did acupuncture and massage.

As I'm sure you know second child IVF has to be a world of difference.

 

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