Time for an update or two:
1. We decided on a final try at IVF
2. We decided we are moving forward with surrogacy regardless - and there's this fun angle of figuring out if we'll get the full benefit our firm offers or not (our policy for employees is up to $20k of surrogacy expenses are reimbursed...the wording implies, to me, that each of us can get that as long as we aren't submitting the same expenses, and surrogacy is WAY more than $20k so we'll see what happens there)
Well we did the embryo transfer last Friday the 16th. And we find out tomorrow if it worked. And, just like last time, despite my urging, my wife took like 3 different at home pregnancy tests yesterday night and they're positive. So now I'm even MORE nervous. Because last time she took multiple tests a day EVERY DAY between the transfer and the official test day, and some were positive some negative. So now I'm pretty sure she thinks it worked and if it didn't, Monday is going to CRUSH her (not to mention now it's in my head).
On the other front, our surrogacy matching profile was approved! And they're posting something somewhere that like helps advertise for them with a picture of us - I'll link it here sometime it's kinda cool to see but it's for like recruiting surrogates, and in exchange for using our picture, it's like $500 off if they get a surrogate who matches with someone through the ad. So that's kinda cool. We had to do a psych exam (we passed!), background checks (we passed duh), and fill out all this info in our profile - way more intense than a dating profile like they analogized. We had to really wrestle for a bit with some of the questions, and some we instantly knew (like "Would you want an amniocentesis?" our response was like we don't really know but if the doctors say they need to do it for some reason, we listen to doctors...versus "Do you need your surrogate to be comfortable with fetal reduction if they have multiples?" where we had a super easy no way we'll happily accept multiples as a miracle). Stuff about how involved you want to be during the pregnancy, presence at birth, how involved you want the surrogate to be after birth, etc. Travel history, a bunch of sharing about yourselves, a letter or prospective surrogates, photos, descriptions of family, family traditions and holidays...it was intense!
SOOOOOOOO...pray for #1 to be positive tomorrow...then it's like 10-ish weeks of "please don't miscarry" then it starts to feel like success. And the faster #2 works the better - I really want to do what I'm calling "non-twin twins" where if my wife has one and the surrogate has one and they're in the same grade, genetically fraternal...but like 4 months apart which is hilarious. And would let us hand me down all the short term things, the sleepless period is less total time because they overlap a lot vs two a year+ apart...I don't know it would be cool.
Exciting!!!!!!!!!!!!!
