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Nigel Tufnel

A note to my coworker ...

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Dear new boss,

Your "I always ask why three times and by the end I have the answer" philosophy doesn't make you sound deep, it makes you annoying as all ####.

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Stop saying "idealistically" so much. Thanks.

I need to work this into a conversation at least once before the end of the week.
Idealistic I don't work here.

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Dear Managing Partner:

Remember last year when I said we should fire that client that refused to pay costs or authorize us to do necessary discovery to prepare for trial? Remember how you said it wouldn't matter because the defendant had insurance and we'd settle it anyway?

When you came into my office today and said I'd be doing the trial, and I said we should just settle for what's on the table because we didn't have the facts to support the case, I meant it. When two other people in our office said the same thing independently, they meant it. So when you told me to just figure out my trial strategy because we were moving forward anyway? I just finished putting together my strategy:

I'm going to lose, badly.

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Good morning Ms. Drunkypants,

Waking up from your stupor at 8:30 PM, and leaving your boss (who is also my boss and likes sharing these things with me) a frantic voicemail about how you're so sorry and you know you're late and you're on the way, is totally awesome.

Cheers!

To understand how funny this is, did she sleep through the entire day and make this call, or did she get hammered after work, pass out, and wake up at 8:30 in the evening, thinking it was morning?
the latter.
Damn, who knew the company would actually hire a P.I. to follow you to "lunch" and report on how many drinks you had? Still you could have let us take you in for the piss test, if for no other reason than to stall for time while you hatched a better plan than "F--- it, I quit".. But hey, it's your life. Gllll peas.

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H. F. S.:confused:Note: Our 'StoreManagers' distribution list consists of over 200 locations, plus maybe 30 Admin staff.So hooray for this guy i guess... :shock:

From: Smith, JohnSent: September 14, 2009 10:47 AMTo: 'StoreManagers'Subject: I AM GAY John SmithAssistant ManagerCompany Name - Toronto Location

But wait, it gets better.

From: Dumas, ImaSent: September 14, 2009 10:50 AMTo: 'StoreManagers'Subject: I apologize, for the e-mail that just came through from John Smith, it was a joke in poor taste and I personally apologize for thisIma DumasManagerCompany Name - Toronto Location

As I was typing this...an outlook message popped up.

RECALL:John Smith would like to recall this message.[ OK ]

:shock:

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H. F. S.:confused:Note: Our 'StoreManagers' distribution list consists of over 200 locations, plus maybe 30 Admin staff.So hooray for this guy i guess... ;)

From: Smith, JohnSent: September 14, 2009 10:47 AMTo: 'StoreManagers'Subject: I AM GAY John SmithAssistant ManagerCompany Name - Toronto Location

But wait, it gets better.

From: Dumas, ImaSent: September 14, 2009 10:50 AMTo: 'StoreManagers'Subject: I apologize, for the e-mail that just came through from John Smith, it was a joke in poor taste and I personally apologize for thisIma DumasManagerCompany Name - Toronto Location

As I was typing this...an outlook message popped up.

RECALL:John Smith would like to recall this message.[ OK ]

:lmao:
I believe that this is reasons 1 thru 10 as to why you never walk away from your email when you are logged in. I always wanted to do something like that as a lesson to my boss and his boss, but I never had the stones to do it. Looking back, I wish I had.

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Dear umm,. whoever the hell you are;

You might want to employ a bit more discretion when using an enclave, especially when it involves matters of personal lubrication. There isn't a soul in the building willing to sit in those chairs, let alone put anything on that table, for fear of catching whatever skeeviness you may have left behind.

Also, you may want to consider using the next enclave over, as the chairs in that one are more comfortable than the one you chose to practice your indiscretions in. Alternately, the Hampton Inn is just up the hill, classy guy.

Sincerely,

The south side of the fourth floor.

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Dear umm,. whoever the hell you are;

You might want to employ a bit more discretion when using an enclave, especially when it involves matters of personal lubrication. There isn't a soul in the building willing to sit in those chairs, let alone put anything on that table, for fear of catching whatever skeeviness you may have left behind.

Also, you may want to consider using the next enclave over, as the chairs in that one are more comfortable than the one you chose to practice your indiscretions in. Alternately, the Hampton Inn is just up the hill, classy guy.

Sincerely,

The south side of the fourth floor.

What's an enclave?

This?

http://cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/reso...ick-Enclave.jpg

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Dear umm,. whoever the hell you are;

You might want to employ a bit more discretion when using an enclave, especially when it involves matters of personal lubrication. There isn't a soul in the building willing to sit in those chairs, let alone put anything on that table, for fear of catching whatever skeeviness you may have left behind.

Also, you may want to consider using the next enclave over, as the chairs in that one are more comfortable than the one you chose to practice your indiscretions in. Alternately, the Hampton Inn is just up the hill, classy guy.

Sincerely,

The south side of the fourth floor.

What's an enclave?

This?

http://cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/reso...ick-Enclave.jpg

Enclaves are what they call the 9x9 conference rooms here. Basically a cubicle with four walls and a door. :lmao:

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Dear umm,. whoever the hell you are;

You might want to employ a bit more discretion when using an enclave, especially when it involves matters of personal lubrication. There isn't a soul in the building willing to sit in those chairs, let alone put anything on that table, for fear of catching whatever skeeviness you may have left behind.

Also, you may want to consider using the next enclave over, as the chairs in that one are more comfortable than the one you chose to practice your indiscretions in. Alternately, the Hampton Inn is just up the hill, classy guy.

Sincerely,

The south side of the fourth floor.

What's an enclave?

This?

http://cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/reso...ick-Enclave.jpg

Enclaves are what they call the 9x9 conference rooms here. Basically a cubicle with four walls and a door. :rolleyes:
So, what exactly was he doing? And who called him?

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Dear Older Lady Who Sits In the Cube Across the Aisle -

Despite the fact that you proclaim loudly, and daily, that your customers love you, the phone calls I and others receive wherein we are asked to keep "that crazy ##### away from us" suggest otherwise. It would be nice if you could live, for just a minute, in the real world, and not the land of sunshine and lollipops you apparently inhabit.

Further, do you think we - who can hear every word you mumble - are interested in how much your acid reflux or irritable bowel syndrome or sweaty feet bother you throughout the day? I know you think you are speaking sotto voce, and I know you have no idea what that means, but really: we don't need to hear it -- just like our customers, whose ears you have bent for 20 minutes with your granddaughter's every diabetic tribulation. We feel for her, but she's, like, eight, and she'll be fine provided you don't dose her with the sugary treats you bake every. Single. Night.

Not 20 minutes ago, you sat there grumbling about one thing or another, and within a span of 2 minutes and 17 seconds, I heard the following:

"Gosh, my head is killing me."

"Jeez Louise, could it be any hotter in here?"

"Man! My feet are sweatin' up a storm!"

These are things that happen to menopausal women, people who probably drink too much wine, and those who don't know when to retire. I feel sympathy for you in some cases, rather like seeing a turtle on his back, and I really do like you as a person. But I truly dread having to come in here, every day, and listen to more of the same old shinola (I used that word especially for you, dear!).

Please, take an aspirin, plug in a fan, and buy some talcum powder, before I step in front of a city bus.

Seriously yours,

SM

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Dear Older Lady Who Sits In the Cube Across the Aisle -

Despite the fact that you proclaim loudly, and daily, that your customers love you, the phone calls I and others receive wherein we are asked to keep "that crazy ##### away from us" suggest otherwise. It would be nice if you could live, for just a minute, in the real world, and not the land of sunshine and lollipops you apparently inhabit.

Further, do you think we - who can hear every word you mumble - are interested in how much your acid reflux or irritable bowel syndrome or sweaty feet bother you throughout the day? I know you think you are speaking sotto voce, and I know you have no idea what that means, but really: we don't need to hear it -- just like our customers, whose ears you have bent for 20 minutes with your granddaughter's every diabetic tribulation. We feel for her, but she's, like, eight, and she'll be fine provided you don't dose her with the sugary treats you bake every. Single. Night.

Not 20 minutes ago, you sat there grumbling about one thing or another, and within a span of 2 minutes and 17 seconds, I heard the following:

"Gosh, my head is killing me."

"Jeez Louise, could it be any hotter in here?"

"Man! My feet are sweatin' up a storm!"

These are things that happen to menopausal women, people who probably drink too much wine, and those who don't know when to retire. I feel sympathy for you in some cases, rather like seeing a turtle on his back, and I really do like you as a person. But I truly dread having to come in here, every day, and listen to more of the same old shinola (I used that word especially for you, dear!).

Please, take an aspirin, plug in a fan, and buy some talcum powder, before I step in front of a city bus.

Seriously yours,

SM

Give me her email adddress and I will send this to her :fishing:

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Dear Chewbacca -There are round paper thingies in the bathroom to cover toilet seats. Not only are they there for your sanitary protection, but more importantly, mine. I would prefer to do my business on a seat that didn't look like it had been used for the hip-hop drummer Quest Love's haircut. Consider investing in an ### razor.Yours in Kojak,R

:thumbup: I've got an extremely hairy ###, and I don't think I've ever dropped a single hair on a toilet seat in my life.

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Dear Chewbacca -There are round paper thingies in the bathroom to cover toilet seats. Not only are they there for your sanitary protection, but more importantly, mine. I would prefer to do my business on a seat that didn't look like it had been used for the hip-hop drummer Quest Love's haircut. Consider investing in an ### razor.Yours in Kojak,R

:goodposting: I've got an extremely hairy ###, and I don't think I've ever dropped a single hair on a toilet seat in my life.
You don't mark where you've been? :excited:

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25 to life --- ouch. Good news is I hear prisoners are big fans of kid touchers, so you've got that going for you.Have some nice seasons :bye:

Do you work in the gold industry?

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Dear umm,. whoever the hell you are;

You might want to employ a bit more discretion when using an enclave, especially when it involves matters of personal lubrication. There isn't a soul in the building willing to sit in those chairs, let alone put anything on that table, for fear of catching whatever skeeviness you may have left behind.

Also, you may want to consider using the next enclave over, as the chairs in that one are more comfortable than the one you chose to practice your indiscretions in. Alternately, the Hampton Inn is just up the hill, classy guy.

Sincerely,

The south side of the fourth floor.

What's an enclave?

This?

http://cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/reso...ick-Enclave.jpg

Enclaves are what they call the 9x9 conference rooms here. Basically a cubicle with four walls and a door. :bye:
So, what exactly was he doing? And who called him?
We don't know. No idea who the person was as whatever the hell they did in there, they did it before anyone arried this AM.

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Dear umm,. whoever the hell you are;

You might want to employ a bit more discretion when using an enclave, especially when it involves matters of personal lubrication. There isn't a soul in the building willing to sit in those chairs, let alone put anything on that table, for fear of catching whatever skeeviness you may have left behind.

Also, you may want to consider using the next enclave over, as the chairs in that one are more comfortable than the one you chose to practice your indiscretions in. Alternately, the Hampton Inn is just up the hill, classy guy.

Sincerely,

The south side of the fourth floor.

What's an enclave?

This?

http://cache.jalopnik.com/cars/assets/reso...ick-Enclave.jpg

Enclaves are what they call the 9x9 conference rooms here. Basically a cubicle with four walls and a door. :bye:
So, what exactly was he doing? And who called him?
We don't know. No idea who the person was as whatever the hell they did in there, they did it before anyone arried this AM.
Late night office sexy time?

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I understand it was a birth defect that caused your left arm to not grow completely leaving a nub right below the elbow. You may not want my sympathy but I feel bad for you since you are such a nice guy. However, the way you kept attaching and removing the binder clip to your nub this morning was weird and kind of gross. Please do not do that again.

Yours in Yahweh,

Juice

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I understand it was a birth defect that caused your left arm to not grow completely leaving a nub right below the elbow. You may not want my sympathy but I feel bad for you since you are such a nice guy. However, the way you kept attaching and removing the binder clip to your nub this morning was weird and kind of gross. Please do not do that again.Yours in Yahweh,Juice

:unsure:

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Oh sweet jesus...

This JUST happened...

DPH-JD: Does the copier sound like a telephone when the pages come out?SJ96  : Um, maybe like a modem I suppose?DPH-JD: No, it sounds like a phone.SJ96  : Ok.DPH-JD: Now, if the copier started talking, that would be weird. :cuewitchcackle:SJ96  : :nervouslyfakelaughs: Actually it would be more weird if YOU were talking to the copier.DPH-JD: No. Voices in my head I understand. But not at work. No voices in my head at work.SJ96  : :blinkblink:DPH-JD: I don't need those problems at work, that can stay at home.SJ96  : :wisheshehadacloackofinvisiblity:

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Dear per diem Boss/CPA/co-worker,

For a CPA with years and years of experience, you really don't know accounting all that well. Getting beginning retained earnings to match last year's ending retained earnings is pretty much basic accounting. How can you overlook this? Also, your clients don't know #### either and you shouldn't rely on their books/entries. A lot of it is just garbage. And you might want to look up the difference between the cash and accrual method of accounting while you are at it.

And when you asked me what church I went to on the very first day I started, don't assume everyone ####### goes to church. I know this is the south and you guys love your guns and religion, but be a little more open minded and respect other people's views/opinions.

Yours in Christ,

eoMMan

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She means well, I know, but...Email Received:

Subject: Your colonI just wanted to say that your new colon smells wonderful!

Dear Dianne,Cologne <> colonTheAristocrat

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Dear Age 60+ overweight lady with braces,

I can imagine getting your braces tightened is painful so please excuse yourself from meetings where you will be using a 'drool napkin' to wipe your mouth every minute or so between the sounds of your lips being smacked together. The drool napkin on the table is both unsanitary and disgusting. Ever notice the last two seats taken in the meeting room are the chairs on either side of you?

Thank you.

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She means well, I know, but...Email Received:

Subject: Your colonI just wanted to say that your new colon smells wonderful!

Dear Dianne,Cologne <> colonTheAristocrat
Urban legend. No way that happened.

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Dear Age 60+ overweight lady with braces,I can imagine getting your braces tightened is painful so please excuse yourself from meetings where you will be using a 'drool napkin' to wipe your mouth every minute or so between the sounds of your lips being smacked together. The drool napkin on the table is both unsanitary and disgusting. Ever notice the last two seats taken in the meeting room are the chairs on either side of you?Thank you.

HA! I've been meaning to post a similar deal.Crazy old DPH JD just got braces...I mean WTF you scraggly faced Skeletor...you need a paper bag...braces aren't going to help that mug.

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SJ96  : :wisheshehadacloackofinvisiblity:
You see a treasure chest in front of you......
:lmao:

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Lysol sprayed on co-worker

OK--which one of you did this? Who finally got pushed over the edge?

Angered at smelly lunch, Mich. man sprays coworker with disinfectant

By Tammy Stables Battaglia and Gina Damron / Detroit Free Press

Friday, October 23, 2009 - Added 7h ago

DETROIT — People put up with a lot at work: loud talkers, weird habits, competitive colleagues.

But for an employee at a Troy, Mich., office, it was a co worker’s stinky salad that sent him over the edge.

Troy police said a 58-year-old staffer at an AT&T customer service center was eating a garlicky salad at his desk Oct. 13 when he heard the 53-year-old man in the cubicle next to his grumbling about the smell.

The salad eater, from Birmingham, Mich., looked up just as an aerosol can rose over the cubicle divider, and he was sprayed in the eyes with disinfectant.

A third worker told Troy Police that the sprayer told the salad eater: "If you bring that smelly food in here again, I’ll spray you again," Lt. Michael Lyczkowski related.

The salad eater didn’t seek medical attention but wants his coworker prosecuted.

Lyczkowski said it’s up to him to follow up on charges with the city attorney.

___

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Female office neighbor. Please just put a sign on your door that says "LOOK AT ME!!!!" and be done with it. Hey everybody, I bike to work! Look how I bring my bike down the hall! LOOK AT ME!!!!! Hey everyone! I volunteer for things. You wouldn't know it except I put a certificate of participation for my volunteering on the front of my door! LOOK AT ME!!!!!! Hey everyone, I'm not going to be into work on Monday. That's enough info but I'll have to add on our online calendar that it's because I'm running a marathon on Sunday. LOOK AT F'N MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! All this and I still look like a linebacker.

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Dear idiot,

How many times have I tried to explain the "trick" to diffusing the owner of our company when he's in a rage??

Correct Method: "I told the factory to order XYZ, exactly as you told me to. The factory must have made a mistake."

Your Method: "You told me to order ABC!"

Do you see now why your method probably isn't the best way to do things? Oh well. Enjoy the unemployment checks.

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Lysol sprayed on co-worker

OK--which one of you did this? Who finally got pushed over the edge?

Angered at smelly lunch, Mich. man sprays coworker with disinfectant

By Tammy Stables Battaglia and Gina Damron / Detroit Free Press

Friday, October 23, 2009 - Added 7h ago

DETROIT — People put up with a lot at work: loud talkers, weird habits, competitive colleagues.

But for an employee at a Troy, Mich., office, it was a co worker’s stinky salad that sent him over the edge.

Troy police said a 58-year-old staffer at an AT&T customer service center was eating a garlicky salad at his desk Oct. 13 when he heard the 53-year-old man in the cubicle next to his grumbling about the smell.

The salad eater, from Birmingham, Mich., looked up just as an aerosol can rose over the cubicle divider, and he was sprayed in the eyes with disinfectant.

A third worker told Troy Police that the sprayer told the salad eater: "If you bring that smelly food in here again, I’ll spray you again," Lt. Michael Lyczkowski related.

The salad eater didn’t seek medical attention but wants his coworker prosecuted.

Lyczkowski said it’s up to him to follow up on charges with the city attorney.

___

Had to be MOP, right?????

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Female office neighbor. Please just put a sign on your door that says "LOOK AT ME!!!!" and be done with it. Hey everybody, I bike to work! Look how I bring my bike down the hall! LOOK AT ME!!!!! Hey everyone! I volunteer for things. You wouldn't know it except I put a certificate of participation for my volunteering on the front of my door! LOOK AT ME!!!!!! Hey everyone, I'm not going to be into work on Monday. That's enough info but I'll have to add on our online calendar that it's because I'm running a marathon on Sunday. LOOK AT F'N MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!! All this and I still look like a linebacker.

does she wear biking shorts and biking jersey, like she's doing the Tour de France?

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Imagine my surprise when the first thing I see when walking into the washroom is you standing in front of the sink with your pants and underwear at your knees. At least your shirt was covering what would have likely been an even worse image that is now permanently burned into my psyche, and I thank you for your efforts to re-clothe yourself quickly, but I have no idea what would compel you to think this was a good idea. After all, the sinks are literally two steps straight ahead from the only door to get into the restroom and are immediately across from the ladies room.

Walking in on you was uncomfortable enough. Then, you had to go and make it even more awkward by saying "what are the chances that someone walks in just as Im doing that." I have no idea what that is, nor do I care to, BUT considering the size of this building and the fact that this is the only mens room for this floor and the floor above it, Id say the chances of someone walking in on you are pretty stinkin good. Idiot.

Thanks for ruining my appetite.

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Imagine my surprise when the first thing I see when walking into the washroom is you standing in front of the sink with your pants and underwear at your knees. At least your shirt was covering what would have likely been an even worse image that is now permanently burned into my psyche, and I thank you for your efforts to re-clothe yourself quickly, but I have no idea what would compel you to think this was a good idea. After all, the sinks are literally two steps straight ahead from the only door to get into the restroom and are immediately across from the ladies room.

Walking in on you was uncomfortable enough. Then, you had to go and make it even more awkward by saying "what are the chances that someone walks in just as Im doing that." I have no idea what that is, nor do I care to, BUT considering the size of this building and the fact that this is the only mens room for this floor and the floor above it, Id say the chances of someone walking in on you are pretty stinkin good. Idiot.

Thanks for ruining my appetite.

Had your fill of sausage?

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Imagine my surprise when the first thing I see when walking into the washroom is you standing in front of the sink with your pants and underwear at your knees. At least your shirt was covering what would have likely been an even worse image that is now permanently burned into my psyche, and I thank you for your efforts to re-clothe yourself quickly, but I have no idea what would compel you to think this was a good idea. After all, the sinks are literally two steps straight ahead from the only door to get into the restroom and are immediately across from the ladies room.

Walking in on you was uncomfortable enough. Then, you had to go and make it even more awkward by saying "what are the chances that someone walks in just as Im doing that." I have no idea what that is, nor do I care to, BUT considering the size of this building and the fact that this is the only mens room for this floor and the floor above it, Id say the chances of someone walking in on you are pretty stinkin good. Idiot.

Thanks for ruining my appetite.

You see his treasure chest in front of you...

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Imagine my surprise when the first thing I see when walking into the washroom is you standing in front of the sink with your pants and underwear at your knees. At least your shirt was covering what would have likely been an even worse image that is now permanently burned into my psyche, and I thank you for your efforts to re-clothe yourself quickly, but I have no idea what would compel you to think this was a good idea. After all, the sinks are literally two steps straight ahead from the only door to get into the restroom and are immediately across from the ladies room.

Walking in on you was uncomfortable enough. Then, you had to go and make it even more awkward by saying "what are the chances that someone walks in just as Im doing that." I have no idea what that is, nor do I care to, BUT considering the size of this building and the fact that this is the only mens room for this floor and the floor above it, Id say the chances of someone walking in on you are pretty stinkin good. Idiot.

Thanks for ruining my appetite.

You see his treasure chest in front of you...
:coffee:

Well played.

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Imagine my surprise when the first thing I see when walking into the washroom is you standing in front of the sink with your pants and underwear at your knees. At least your shirt was covering what would have likely been an even worse image that is now permanently burned into my psyche, and I thank you for your efforts to re-clothe yourself quickly, but I have no idea what would compel you to think this was a good idea. After all, the sinks are literally two steps straight ahead from the only door to get into the restroom and are immediately across from the ladies room.

Walking in on you was uncomfortable enough. Then, you had to go and make it even more awkward by saying "what are the chances that someone walks in just as Im doing that." I have no idea what that is, nor do I care to, BUT considering the size of this building and the fact that this is the only mens room for this floor and the floor above it, Id say the chances of someone walking in on you are pretty stinkin good. Idiot.

Thanks for ruining my appetite.

You see his treasure chest in front of you...
:goodposting:

Well played.

Apparently lots of people shave when they get to work...

...well, their face anyway.

Oops, pubes

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I haven't been around much lately, can someone unpack the "treasure chest" thing for me?

That's what she said.

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Dear CEO -

When we were at our supplier's plant a couple of weeks ago, you locked all of us into a room after banishing the supplier reps, and proceeded to ask us to behave ourselves in this tiny town, as we represent not only our oompany, but our region and state. Your point was well-taken, but due to your ambiguity about what, exactly, that Holiday Inn employee witnessed and wrote a letter to you about, none of us is sure who the perpetrator(s) is/were.

What you have created amongst us is a culture of fear, intrigue, and rumor-mongering. And since I'm the guy who used to front a rock band, everyone assumes I'm the hotel-trasher or employee-disrespecter, or whatever.

Little do you know that I spent the evening in question out on the town with the friggin' MAYOR of that town, and that we got along swimmingly, and further, if I wanted, I'd have a job in his administration just for the asking.

Yes, I closed down a bar. But being raised right, I came into the hotel quietly, alone, and went straight to bed. WHoever your hellraiser was, it wasn't me, and I think we'd all appreciate it if you'd come out and treat us like adults by naming names and shaming those who were responsible for upsetting that hotel clerk.

If you don't, I'm afraid I'm gonna hafta pick up the intercom and publicly denounce you and whoever the idiot was who couldn't handle his liquor.

It wasn't me, and I'm tired of the sideways glances I'm getting from everyone around me. None of THEM are pals with the mayor...

-SM

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Dear CEO -When we were at our supplier's plant a couple of weeks ago, you locked all of us into a room after banishing the supplier reps, and proceeded to ask us to behave ourselves in this tiny town, as we represent not only our oompany, but our region and state. Your point was well-taken, but due to your ambiguity about what, exactly, that Holiday Inn employee witnessed and wrote a letter to you about, none of us is sure who the perpetrator(s) is/were.What you have created amongst us is a culture of fear, intrigue, and rumor-mongering. And since I'm the guy who used to front a rock band, everyone assumes I'm the hotel-trasher or employee-disrespecter, or whatever.Little do you know that I spent the evening in question out on the town with the friggin' MAYOR of that town, and that we got along swimmingly, and further, if I wanted, I'd have a job in his administration just for the asking. Yes, I closed down a bar. But being raised right, I came into the hotel quietly, alone, and went straight to bed. WHoever your hellraiser was, it wasn't me, and I think we'd all appreciate it if you'd come out and treat us like adults by naming names and shaming those who were responsible for upsetting that hotel clerk.If you don't, I'm afraid I'm gonna hafta pick up the intercom and publicly denounce you and whoever the idiot was who couldn't handle his liquor. It wasn't me, and I'm tired of the sideways glances I'm getting from everyone around me. None of THEM are pals with the mayor...-SM

CEO got snockered and was shot down in his attempts to pick up the local barslut. Loudly.Guaranteed.

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:pickle: 3 people around me right now eating chips.. I just love listening to CRUNCH..CRUNCH..CRUNCH... :wall:

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:hey: 3 people around me right now eating chips.. I just love listening to CRUNCH..CRUNCH..CRUNCH... :wall:

So glad I have an office. I would throw myself through a wall if I had to listen to that.

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I have an office too, but the losers in the offices nearby like to yell to each other and make absurdly dumb jokes and laugh entirely too loud... it makes for a long day unless I use my headphones.

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I have an office too, but the losers in the offices nearby like to yell to each other and make absurdly dumb jokes and laugh entirely too loud... it makes for a long day unless I use my headphones.

:lmao: Somewhere along the way, the entire world decided that silence is a bad thing. :rant: Edited by GreatLakesMike

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One of my favorite large company hiccups, the inadvertent mass-email:Sent to a Large Business Unit email distribution list (around 1000 people):

Nancy,Please can you advise if the below order is valid for for part nubmer XXXXX X 8 pcs Order number : XXXXXXXXthanks

followed by approximately 50 responses of:

I think I have been copied in error.

mixed in with about 100 responses (replying to all) of:

PLEASE STOP REPLYING TO ALL!!!

this includes an email from a guy asking to stop replying to all, followed 20 minutes later by an email from the same guy, replying to all, saying that he was copied in error.when it's time for the next layoff, these people better be at the top of the list.

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