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***Official*** FFA iDating Thread

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15 hours ago, Walking Boot said:

 

I'll confess, I was 39 and hooked up with an 18 year old and it's the kind of moment I'll treasure forever. It was a great night and well worth it. 

Not the kind of girl I'm looking to take home to the family, just a girl for the night, and nothing wrong with it.

Wow 18 , that's pretty creepy.

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15 hours ago, EYLive said:

I think this formula is intended for younger guys that want to be "safe". But for older guys that aren't looking for a life partner, I don't see why he shouldn't go for that 18 year old. Sure it's creepy, but who cares what other people think.

Beyond creepy 

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5 hours ago, irish eyes said:

Beyond creepy 

Here’s the thing, Meemaw. It’s not 1890 anymore. It’s modern day, and women have sex before marriage, and I think we need to celebrate that. And I know in your day, she would be considered a whore. But now, women go out, and they have sex, and they get wild, and they take their tops off, and they have pictures taken of them. And we need to encourage that. That’s part of life! 

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For the guys that have been through this more with the goal of meeting someone beyond just a hookup, do you think its a bad idea to be actively pursuing two women at the same time?  Wife and I finally separated 6 months ago and I've for some unknown reason decided to start talking to both women in the same period and now I'm planning dates with both of them.   

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5 minutes ago, NutterButter said:

For the guys that have been through this more with the goal of meeting someone beyond just a hookup, do you think its a bad idea to be actively pursuing two women at the same time?  Wife and I finally separated 6 months ago and I've for some unknown reason decided to start talking to both women in the same period and now I'm planning dates with both of them.   

I did it a couple of times but cut one loose after 3 dates.  That was my rule.  

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7 minutes ago, NutterButter said:

For the guys that have been through this more with the goal of meeting someone beyond just a hookup, do you think its a bad idea to be actively pursuing two women at the same time?  Wife and I finally separated 6 months ago and I've for some unknown reason decided to start talking to both women in the same period and now I'm planning dates with both of them.   

Nope. Not at all. 2 is the most I could juggle at once and actually give them attention. Just be honest it’s not exclusive, until it is. One will inevitably drift away from you when you realize you enjoy being with someone more.

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16 minutes ago, Bucky86 said:

Nope. Not at all. 2 is the most I could juggle at once and actually give them attention. Just be honest it’s not exclusive, until it is. One will inevitably drift away from you when you realize you enjoy being with someone more.

Is that something you would bring up or more of if the question is posed to answer it truthfully?

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1 minute ago, NutterButter said:

Is that something you would bring up or more of if the question is posed to answer it truthfully?

I don't see any reason to bring it up, but I'd also answer truthfully if they asked. 

 

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11 hours ago, NutterButter said:

For the guys that have been through this more with the goal of meeting someone beyond just a hookup, do you think its a bad idea to be actively pursuing two women at the same time?  Wife and I finally separated 6 months ago and I've for some unknown reason decided to start talking to both women in the same period and now I'm planning dates with both of them.   

My wife watched a movie over the weekend that I think is related to your situation:

Trailer

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3 hours ago, eoMMan said:

My wife watched a movie over the weekend that I think is related to your situation:

Trailer

I can see it.  I've been out of the game for 20 years and to be honest I wasn't a star player back then.    Hopefully it ends up the way it does in the trailer.   Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose.   

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On ‎11‎/‎7‎/‎2018 at 7:19 PM, Walking Boot said:

 

I'll confess, I was 39 and hooked up with an 18 year old and it's the kind of moment I'll treasure forever. It was a great night and well worth it. 

Not the kind of girl I'm looking to take home to the family, just a girl for the night, and nothing wrong with it.

Haven't been in here for a while but it looks like it's time for me to jump in again and defend this type of thing from the "creepy" crowd.  Totally worth it and absolutely nothing wrong with it.

I've got you beat.  I was 45.  :P  :hifive:

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:blackdot:Placeholder. Tinder is ridiculously easy, and surprisingly full of cool, down-to-earth women. Of course, i am devastatingly handsome, so that helps. I have 2 dates tomorrow.

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I'm now officially a sugar daddy. AMA. It's been fun and interesting and exactly what I need to get the hell away from relationships. 

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14 minutes ago, John Bender said:

I'm now officially a sugar daddy. AMA. It's been fun and interesting and exactly what I need to get the hell away from relationships. 

How old?

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1 hour ago, ProstheticRGK said:

How old?

I'm 36. My Las Vegas girl is 22 (I travel to Vegas about once a month).

My local girl is 29

My Southeast/Florida/Atlanta girl is 42 (and looks better than the younger ones). 

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Metting a new girl in Charleston next weekend. Shes 40, busty blonde, wants to be treated and taken care of, promises good sex. Will update here. If things work out, she'll accompany me to vegas in 3 weeks and we'll meet up with my girl there and all have some fun (Vegas girl is already in, just need to work on the South Carolina one). 

Edited by John Bender

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On 7/5/2019 at 8:23 PM, John Bender said:

I'm now officially a sugar daddy. AMA. It's been fun and interesting and exactly what I need to get the hell away from relationships. 

What's it cost to keep 3 in the stable?

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Not much, I insist on a pay per meet. not an allowance.  My best girl right now just want to travel, I pay, we have sex, she goes home, It's pretty easy

 

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23 minutes ago, John Bender said:

Not much, I insist on a pay per meet. not an allowance.  My best girl right now just want to travel, I pay, we have sex, she goes home, It's pretty easy

 

I thought you were just joking about being a sugar daddy.   :oldunsure:

Edited by NotSmart

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1 minute ago, NotSmart said:

I thought you were just joking about being a sugar daddy.   :oldunsure:

no joke. life is soo much better. 

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48 minutes ago, John Bender said:

Not much, I insist on a pay per meet. not an allowance.  My best girl right now just want to travel, I pay, we have sex, she goes home, It's pretty easy

 

Um, you sure that's being a sugar daddy?  Sounds more like a client/escort relationship.  Not judging.  Your name is John after all.

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52 minutes ago, eoMMan said:

Why pay? 

Sounds like a waste of money and a headache. 

He's paying them to leave.  Probably cheaper in the long run and less taxing emotionally than balancing a bunch of girls that all want a relationship.  

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13 hours ago, WDIK2 said:

Um, you sure that's being a sugar daddy?  Sounds more like a client/escort relationship.  Not judging.  Your name is John after all.

A strict escort relationship would involve just $ for sechs. This is dating, but dating where both parties get what they want, besides a relationship. The one lady wants to travel. He pays for the trip and she provides companionship.  In other cases, he probably pays for a nice meal, maybe a shopping trip or a show etc and they spend adult time together. There is no expectation on either party that the relationship is progressing towards exclusivity, marriage or moving in together etc. 

If you think about it, either way, the guy is going to pay for it. Whether it is a strict cash transaction to a marriage where the dude supports the household and/or makes other contributions.  I realize that there are relationships where the wife is the sole bread winner and the man stays at home without any responsibility,  that seems incredibly rare.   In fact, if anyone knows of a sugar mama looking for someone, send her my way, this working thing is getting old. Thanks!

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3 minutes ago, Angry Beavers said:

A strict escort relationship would involve just $ for sechs

No first hand knowledge, but I'm pretty sure you can hire escorts for dates and to attend events/travel with you.  In most cases I'm sure escort is just a synonym for prostitute, but I don't believe the strict definition of the two is the same.  :shrug:

Again, not judging at all.  Live like you wanna live. 

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3 minutes ago, WDIK2 said:

No first hand knowledge, but I'm pretty sure you can hire escorts for dates and to attend events/travel with you.  In most cases I'm sure escort is just a synonym for prostitute, but I don't believe the strict definition of the two is the same.  :shrug:

Again, not judging at all.  Live like you wanna live. 

Yep.  The GFE's are very popular.   It's really semantics imo.  Some women are comfortable calling themselves escorts or prostitutes while some would rather have the sugar baby title.  

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yeah I should clear up my situation. Im twice divorced at a young age. Im wealthy, I love to travel. So what I described last night sounds like prostitution and in many ways it is. 

That said, I'm fine with it. I dont want a LTR at all. I travel, I pay for ####, I pay her, we go out for dinner, in between of travel she gives me lots of attention, sex is pretty much implied and is always mind blowing. I think somebody said earlier, I'm paying them to go away after. That's exactly it. I don't want a girlfriend, but when I travel, I want a date/compianion and somebody to have sex with.

 

Most sugar babys ask for an "allowance" so monthly you pay them a stipend. I have insisted on a pay per meet. You travel with me somewhere, I pay on the front, we act as a couple, have sex and then go out separate ways.

 

I dunno, it works for me You get way better looking women I don't want a reltationship and I have the money to cover it. :shrug: 

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56 minutes ago, John Bender said:

yeah I should clear up my situation. Im twice divorced at a young age. Im wealthy, I love to travel. So what I described last night sounds like prostitution and in many ways it is. 

That said, I'm fine with it. I dont want a LTR at all. I travel, I pay for ####, I pay her, we go out for dinner, in between of travel she gives me lots of attention, sex is pretty much implied and is always mind blowing. I think somebody said earlier, I'm paying them to go away after. That's exactly it. I don't want a girlfriend, but when I travel, I want a date/compianion and somebody to have sex with.

 

Most sugar babys ask for an "allowance" so monthly you pay them a stipend. I have insisted on a pay per meet. You travel with me somewhere, I pay on the front, we act as a couple, have sex and then go out separate ways.

 

I dunno, it works for me You get way better looking women I don't want a reltationship and I have the money to cover it. :shrug: 

Sounds like a great situation for all parties involved.  I never understood the monthly allowance thing from the male perspective.  Seems like it would make them complacent and eventually ungrateful.  How much are you usually dropping on them during these outings/getaways?  

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5 minutes ago, eoMMan said:

Yeah, and I think there should be a separate thread for the sugar daddy stuff.

Please keep this thread for stories of guys not paying for it (at least directly). 

You’re all paying for it, guy 😂😂 He’s just guaranteeing getting something for his dinner and drinks.  

Keep posting Bender :thumbup: 

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:subscribe:

ETA: Assuming this women all work for themselves. The pimp construct turns my stomach.

Edited by Apple Jack
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2 hours ago, eoMMan said:

Yeah, and I think there should be a separate thread for the sugar daddy stuff.

Please keep this thread for stories of guys not paying for it (at least directly). 

I'm interested in both worlds and often see the two colliding.  The amount of sugar baby types that show up on my tinder/bumble feed has definitely peaked my interest.  And don't think for a second a lot of these Instagram 'models' are paying for all these fabulous vacations with influencer money.  There's normally a John Bender lurking in the background somewhere ;)

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7 hours ago, Apple Jack said:

:subscribe:

ETA: Assuming this women all work for themselves. The pimp construct turns my stomach.

Of course. With my Vegas gal sometimes there is no sex at all. She gets dressed up we go drinking dancing eating and gambling. In many ways it's similar to prostitution. In many ways it is not. Clear as mud. Local gal, sometimes we just sit on the couch and eat take out and watch TV (we've genuinely built a really good friendship over the months, she is cool as hell, wasn't even looking for an "arrangement" but I offered to pay for the time she'd have to take off work to spend time with me). The southern gal is my travel companion more than anyone else. If I want to go to a foreign country (I LOVE to travel) she comes with me, I pay her for the days she'd be away from work (hairdresser I think) plus for the trip etc. Sex isn't necessarily guaranteed or expected on either side. You sort of set those types of ground rules up front with what you both expect and come to an agreement. (I dont want to have sex with a girl who finds me unattractive. If she does find me attractive (middle aged overweight whale) then we do it. If she doesn't then the arrangement doesn't last too long - if she doesn't like me, why would I bring her places and buy her stuff?

Last time I was with the Vegas girl I didn't even pay her. I got a great massage and old fashion, and gave her one in return. We both agreed that was mutually beneficial and enough. So again - clear as mud. To be fair I was wasted for most of the trip and probably couldn't perform anyway. 

My last gal from the south/travel partner was also older. We went to Vegas a few times I paid for the trip bought her an expensive purse for her and her daughter (she didn't ask for it either, I just did it). Never gave her a dime otherwise. We had a wonderful time together, she just couldn't keep up with the travel.

Also, sex with older women waaaaaaaaaay better than with younger in my experience. They know what they're doing, have less boundaries, etc. Much prefer someone in her 40s to someone in her 20s 

Edited by John Bender

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5 hours ago, eoMMan said:

Yeah, and I think there should be a separate thread for the sugar daddy stuff.

Please keep this thread for stories of guys not paying for it (at least directly). 

 

:hey:

I'm not paying for it (directly), and the women I'm 'dating' know they're not getting a "leading to marriage" relationship out of me. They may end up long-term, but, they know there's a limit on what they're getting out of my time and attention.

They all know about the others and are cool with it. They all date other guys too and I'm cool with that. I just enjoy having time to myself when I want it, and companionship when I want it. I have no problem keeping it all casual and I like having some options. And when I do want to fly to Hawaii I've got someone to bring with, and when I'm in Vegas I have someone local I can call to spend time with. 

I have no problem with what @John Bender is doing, though. If I had money, maybe I'd do the same thing. It's probably just easier on him--I know finding girls who are cool with my situation is difficult for me--it's not easy to say "Hey, I'm a middle-aged overweight balding dude looking to hang out while I'm not with any of my other girlfriends" and have a lot of luck with that. It's kind of a miracle it's happened so much so far; I'm constantly surprised on how many women are actually cool with it and not asking to be compensated lol. It's weird how often they're all cheap dates. I'd say right now it's 50/50 on girls who will go for the sechs on the first date, and the most I've spent on a date is $28 in the last few years of doing this. 

The newest one is this girl in her early 20s I'm seeing. She's got 3 jobs, like all the millennials--she's an 'influencer', she works for some weed startup here in LA, and she's an actress too. She's loaded with daddy's money, already on her second BMW. Just typing that out, you'd think she was a prime gold-digger, but other than splitting a personal pizza with her once, I haven't spent a dime and she hasn't even hinted. We just text when we want to have the sechs and she comes over for a few hours. She texts me asking for it as much as I've texted her to hook up, it's been fun. 

Anyway, there's a wide spectrum of possibilities and arrangements. You'd be surprised what's out there when you're up front about what you're looking for and just ask. Some situations are just more direct to the point than others. Honestly recently I've been thinking I wouldn't mind having someone local to do dating stuff with that doesn't fit with the girls I'm currently seeing, so I'm probably going to go back to the pool to see about adding another girl into the rotation. I figure it might take me six to nine months to find someone new who's 1) fun 2) attractive 3) compatible, and 4) cool with my existing multiple-partner situation. Meanwhile JB can just order it off the menu. More power to him.

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On 7/6/2019 at 6:26 PM, John Bender said:

Metting a new girl in Charleston next weekend. Shes 40, busty blonde, wants to be treated and taken care of, promises good sex. Will update here. If things work out, she'll accompany me to vegas in 3 weeks and we'll meet up with my girl there and all have some fun (Vegas girl is already in, just need to work on the South Carolina one). 

Charleston is the best talent in one city I’ve seen when I partied there in my twenties. 

Its amazing how much things have changed since my dating days ending 2006.....living vicariously through you.  :popcorn:

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59 minutes ago, eoMMan said:

I never said I have a problem with it. Like you say, more power to him.

But it's basically prostitution and will result in this thread getting clipped.

That sounds unlikely but I'll step out of here for the purposes of this thread. I had previously documented dating life here and on :e: extensively, thought it was in bounds :shrug:

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2 minutes ago, eoMMan said:

Carry on. I'll shut up.

Nah I respect people and their opinions. It's totally fine and understandable where you're coming from. I brought something weird to this thread I think but don't really care. I thought it was unique enough to share for the men forever dating without being too non-jesus friendly. I know you're good people and I respect your opinion and I think you're half right. 

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1 hour ago, John Bender said:

Nah I respect people and their opinions. It's totally fine and understandable where you're coming from. I brought something weird to this thread I think but don't really care. I thought it was unique enough to share for the men forever dating without being too non-jesus friendly. I know you're good people and I respect your opinion and I think you're half right. 

I’d prefer you continue :(

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1 hour ago, John Bender said:

Nah I respect people and their opinions. It's totally fine and understandable where you're coming from. I brought something weird to this thread I think but don't really care. I thought it was unique enough to share for the men forever dating without being too non-jesus friendly. I know you're good people and I respect your opinion and I think you're half right. 

Way to go eoman 

 

cant imagine how much of a travesty it would be is this thread “got clipped” 

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2 hours ago, John Bender said:

Nah I respect people and their opinions. It's totally fine and understandable where you're coming from. I brought something weird to this thread I think but don't really care. I thought it was unique enough to share for the men forever dating without being too non-jesus friendly. I know you're good people and I respect your opinion and I think you're half right. 

Once the possibility of the thread getting the ax was brought up, although I hadn’t even thought of it that way, I agree that it’s possible since the crackdown. It’s sad that it needs to be a consideration. It would be a shame to lose the idating thread. Maybe start a new one JB with a fairly innocuous title so it’s separate? I concur that you should continue. Great stuff!

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3 minutes ago, Johnny Rock said:

Once the possibility of the thread getting the ax was brought up, although I hadn’t even thought of it that way, I agree that it’s possible since the crackdown. It’s sad that it needs to be a consideration. It would be a shame to lose the idating thread. Maybe start a new one JB with a fairly innocuous title so it’s separate? I concur that you should continue. Great stuff!

Talking about sex without giving intimate or pornographic details among men dating shouldn't be something to be shamed or banned IMO. I couldn't believe at first eom was serious but realized now I might have f'd up the politics here with thread bannings. I'll think of how to proceed. I'm going to SC this weekend with one of my gals and would love to share. Let's see how the temperature in here goes in between now and when I return on Tuesday of next week. I wish e was still around. 

Edited by John Bender
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