What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Welcome to Our Forums. Once you've registered and logged in, you're primed to talk football, among other topics, with the sharpest and most experienced fantasy players on the internet.

Things that only Happen in Florida! (1 Viewer)

Something happened in South Florida today. The humidity was out of the air and a dry tropical breeze was present. Best weather in the world for the next 8 months, enjoy the winter everyone.

 
FLorida drive-through funeral home demolished

a large drive-through bank teller window was added to the Westside Serenity Funeral Home after the city denied a request for additional parking.

The deceased lay in state next to the window behind closed drapes that opened when the front tires of a car passed over a rubber cable on the ground. Mourners signed in at a register kept in a deposit drawer. When the car's back tires drove over the cable again, the drapes closed and the lights and music that mourners heard shut off.
 
FLorida drive-through funeral home demolished

a large drive-through bank teller window was added to the Westside Serenity Funeral Home after the city denied a request for additional parking.

The deceased lay in state next to the window behind closed drapes that opened when the front tires of a car passed over a rubber cable on the ground. Mourners signed in at a register kept in a deposit drawer. When the car's back tires drove over the cable again, the drapes closed and the lights and music that mourners heard shut off.
Awesome.

 
Florida mom (and 8000 other petition signers) gets Breaking Bad toys pulled from Toys R Us shelves.

The Fort Myers, Florida, mom, identified by news media as Susan Schrivjer, launched a petition on change.org last week, demanding that Toys R Us immediately stop selling the dolls. The mom, who wrote the petition under the name Susan Myers, said that the dolls are a "dangerous deviation from their family friendly values."
Good old Florida, can't even might their own business.

 
here is a true story. my grandmother, who i couldn't stand, was a severe manic. mega bi polar. back in the day she moved to florida out of the blue and into a 55+ community. well! when she was high it was bat #### crazy. she was one of the few that had a car and could drive though she likely was 70s. the bi polar kinda gave her super powers in her mind. as a way to make some cash she became what is now uber. she would drive people to the doctor and appointments. her best friend was a one armed one legged woman that i would call the gimp or slots (a one armed bandit). when high, my grandmother was oblivious and would drive like the 72 malibu had jet fuel. so, my mom gets a call one night about an accident. apparently, my grandmother was driving slots to the doctor at a high rate of speed and Made a sharp left..........you guessed it, slots must've not locked the door and she tried to grab something but opened the door and apparently rolled into the road. but my grandmother drove the 15 minutes to the doctor never realizing slots was gone or the door was flinging open. i always picture this woman rolling out of the car while my grandmother carried on her conversation. insurance company wouldn't pay either because they deemed her to be operating as a taxi. the #### that she accumulated that i just came across was epic.

 
here is a true story. my grandmother, who i couldn't stand, was a severe manic. mega bi polar. back in the day she moved to florida out of the blue and into a 55+ community. well! when she was high it was bat #### crazy. she was one of the few that had a car and could drive though she likely was 70s. the bi polar kinda gave her super powers in her mind. as a way to make some cash she became what is now uber. she would drive people to the doctor and appointments. her best friend was a one armed one legged woman that i would call the gimp or slots (a one armed bandit). when high, my grandmother was oblivious and would drive like the 72 malibu had jet fuel. so, my mom gets a call one night about an accident. apparently, my grandmother was driving slots to the doctor at a high rate of speed and Made a sharp left..........you guessed it, slots must've not locked the door and she tried to grab something but opened the door and apparently rolled into the road. but my grandmother drove the 15 minutes to the doctor never realizing slots was gone or the door was flinging open. i always picture this woman rolling out of the car while my grandmother carried on her conversation. insurance company wouldn't pay either because they deemed her to be operating as a taxi. the #### that she accumulated that i just came across was epic.
Don't tell me your Grandma and Slots lived in Margate, Florida

 
NEPTUNE BEACH, Fla. -

The Neptune Beach City Council race that ended with a tie vote finally has a resolution. Richard Arthur won a game of chance Saturday morning at the Supervisor of Elections office by drawing a higher numbered ping pong ball than his opponent, Rory Diamond.

It didn't take long -- Diamond won a coin toss to decide who would draw first and elected to choose second. Arthur pulled a 12 out of the bag and Rory drew a 4.

With that, months of campaigning and hard work came to an end.

"You just have to prepare mentally for either way because it can go either way. You can never prepare for a game of chance. You just have to go in with the best attitude either way however it turns out," said Arthur.

"The statute says a game a chance. I would have done a coin flip, because if it's good enough for the Super Bowl it's good enough for me. But ping-pong balls is just fine," said Diamond.

Both candidates agreed to the rules for the game of chance that Supervisor of Elections Jerry Holland came up with. Holland said he thinks there are two other tied races in Florida from this election that would be decided by game of chance, but he it was historic for Duval County.

"We've seen so many close races, as close as two votes, but I've never seen a tied race. So it's great to be a part of history," said Holland.

Now that Arthur knows that he will hold the council seat, he said he can focus on helping make Neptune Beach a better place to live.

"A lot of work to do. I am excited," said Arthur, who has already served for four years. "(This) gives me the opportunity to continue doing what I've been doing to improve the area."

With this race decided, Holland was able to certify all of the election results in Duval County from earlier this month.
http://www.news4jax.com/news/game-of-chance-decided-city-council-seat-in-neptune-beach/29738232

 
Last edited by a moderator:
NEPTUNE BEACH, Fla. -

The Neptune Beach City Council race that ended with a tie vote finally has a resolution. Richard Arthur won a game of chance Saturday morning at the Supervisor of Elections office by drawing a higher numbered ping pong ball than his opponent, Rory Diamond.

It didn't take long -- Diamond won a coin toss to decide who would draw first and elected to choose second. Arthur pulled a 12 out of the bag and Rory drew a 4.

With that, months of campaigning and hard work came to an end.

"You just have to prepare mentally for either way because it can go either way. You can never prepare for a game of chance. You just have to go in with the best attitude either way however it turns out," said Arthur.

"The statute says a game a chance. I would have done a coin flip, because if it's good enough for the Super Bowl it's good enough for me. But ping-pong balls is just fine," said Diamond.

Both candidates agreed to the rules for the game of chance that Supervisor of Elections Jerry Holland came up with. Holland said he thinks there are two other tied races in Florida from this election that would be decided by game of chance, but he it was historic for Duval County.

"We've seen so many close races, as close as two votes, but I've never seen a tied race. So it's great to be a part of history," said Holland.

Now that Arthur knows that he will hold the council seat, he said he can focus on helping make Neptune Beach a better place to live.

"A lot of work to do. I am excited," said Arthur, who has already served for four years. "(This) gives me the opportunity to continue doing what I've been doing to improve the area."

With this race decided, Holland was able to certify all of the election results in Duval County from earlier this month.
http://www.news4jax.com/news/game-of-chance-decided-city-council-seat-in-neptune-beach/29738232
Last year, I wrote my name in for Inspector of Elections for my township. Apparently, another guy wrote his name in. I go to the County Board of Elections were lots were drawn to decide who won. County election official drew for the other guy who wasn't there - he got 6. Official looks at me like I have this in the bag. I drew 2. :bag:

 
http://m.clickorlando.com/news/cops-woman-punches-2-dining-at-downtown-orlando-restaurant/29912188

A woman bonded out of the Orange County Jail on Monday night after being arrested in connection with a random attack in downtown Orlando.

Orlando police said Billie Jean Pryor (pictured below), 27, ran up to two people who were dining at the outside tables at Gringos Locos restaurant on East Washington Avenue at approximately 2:15 Monday morning. They said she punched an older man twice in the back of the head, and she then punched a younger woman in the face.

"This girl literally ran through and hit people for no reason," said restaurant worker Kris Pittman, who watched the attack through the front window.

He told Local 6 the punch that hit the younger woman knocked out at least one of her teeth and crushed several other back inside her mouth.

"She was bleeding a lot," he said. "Everybody freaked out and started calling 911. The girl took off running over toward Orange Avenue."

Billie Jean Pryor A man who happened to see what happened followed Pryor as she ran off. Orlando police investigators said he helped them track her down about a block away from the scene of the attack.

She was taken into custody and charged with felony battery and battery on a person 65 years of age or older.

As a term of her release, a judge told her to stay away from the victims and the restaurant

 
The Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office received a call at 2:48 a.m. Sunday reporting a man knocking over Christmas decorations and yelling at another person. When deputies arrived, they found 65-year-old Gloria Watkins slumped forward in a chair with arrows protruding from her head.

Her son, Michael Watkins, 42, admitted to the killing, according to an arrest report.

"You see that, that's death," Watkins said as he pointed to his mother, according to the report.

Watkins claimed his mother "stole his diamonds and also gave his father cancer" and that "he had to kill her because she was trying to kill him," the report said. The report did not say why or how she was trying to kill him.
http://bigstory.ap.org/article/7b70f4d048364444813dd9641d02188c/florida-woman-found-dead-arrows-head

 
Orion launch delayed at Cape Canaveral:

NASA @NASA Follow

#Orion is currently "no-go" due to a range issue. There's a boat in the launch area. Teams are working to remove the boat from the area.

6:50 AM - 4 Dec 2014

Probably some ding dong trying to get a better view.

 
Florida woman attacks twin sister over boyfriend, sex toy: cops

Heidi Creamer, 48, reportedly told cops that she and her sister Holly were fighting 'over a vibrator and her boyfriend' at their Ellenton apartment on Sunday. She has been charged with domestic battery.

BY LEE MORAN NEW YORK DAILY NEWS Wednesday, December 10, 2014, 7:12 AM
A Florida twin savagely battered her sister to the floor in a fight over one of their boyfriends and a sex toy, police said.

Heidi Creamer, 48, allegedly punched, kicked and scratched her sibling Holly at the Ellenton apartment they share with Heidi's partner on Sunday afternoon, reports The Smoking Gun.

Cops were called by concerned neighbors who heard the commotion.

They arrived to find Heidi Creamer locked outside.

She was pounding on the front door and "her body was shaking," an arrest report states.

Creamer, who has previously been arrested for drunk driving and assault, was charged with domestic battery.

Cops do not know exactly why the duo were arguing over the boyfriend or the sex toy.

But Heidi Creamer, who has previously been arrested for drunk driving and assault, was charged with domestic battery and booked into Manatee County jail.

Bond has yet to be set.
 
Florida woman attacks twin sister over boyfriend, sex toy: cops

Heidi Creamer, 48, reportedly told cops that she and her sister Holly were fighting 'over a vibrator and her boyfriend' at their Ellenton apartment on Sunday. She has been charged with domestic battery.

BY LEE MORAN NEW YORK DAILY NEWS Wednesday, December 10, 2014, 7:12 AM
A Florida twin savagely battered her sister to the floor in a fight over one of their boyfriends and a sex toy, police said.

Heidi Creamer, 48, allegedly punched, kicked and scratched her sibling Holly at the Ellenton apartment they share with Heidi's partner on Sunday afternoon, reports The Smoking Gun.

Cops were called by concerned neighbors who heard the commotion.

They arrived to find Heidi Creamer locked outside.

She was pounding on the front door and "her body was shaking," an arrest report states.

Creamer, who has previously been arrested for drunk driving and assault, was charged with domestic battery.

Cops do not know exactly why the duo were arguing over the boyfriend or the sex toy.

But Heidi Creamer, who has previously been arrested for drunk driving and assault, was charged with domestic battery and booked into Manatee County jail.

Bond has yet to be set.
Just the names Heidi & Holly Creamer alone makes this story. :thumbup:

 
Florida woman attacks twin sister over boyfriend, sex toy: cops

Heidi Creamer, 48, reportedly told cops that she and her sister Holly were fighting 'over a vibrator and her boyfriend' at their Ellenton apartment on Sunday. She has been charged with domestic battery.

BY LEE MORAN NEW YORK DAILY NEWS Wednesday, December 10, 2014, 7:12 AM
A Florida twin savagely battered her sister to the floor in a fight over one of their boyfriends and a sex toy, police said.

Heidi Creamer, 48, allegedly punched, kicked and scratched her sibling Holly at the Ellenton apartment they share with Heidi's partner on Sunday afternoon, reports The Smoking Gun.

Cops were called by concerned neighbors who heard the commotion.

They arrived to find Heidi Creamer locked outside.

She was pounding on the front door and "her body was shaking," an arrest report states.

Creamer, who has previously been arrested for drunk driving and assault, was charged with domestic battery.

Cops do not know exactly why the duo were arguing over the boyfriend or the sex toy.

But Heidi Creamer, who has previously been arrested for drunk driving and assault, was charged with domestic battery and booked into Manatee County jail.

Bond has yet to be set.
Just the names Heidi & Holly Creamer alone makes this story. :thumbup:
This.

 
KISSIMMEE, Fla. -

A longtime Osceola County teacher has been reassigned after taking a fake rifle to Neptune Middle School in Kissimmee.

Local 6 has learned the toy musket was used during the history teacher's lesson on the American Revolutionary War. The eighth-grade teacher, identified as Gema Evans, used the prop last week. But this week, students came forward with concerns. The Osceola County School District said several complained that they were frightened by the replica.

"If it was one of those, like a squirt gun looking thing, then by all means, that's fine," said one parent, Lauren Beck.

Another parent, Donna Smith, told Local 6, " I think she took it too far in today's times. Any other time, I would say 'no.'"

A woman who knows the teacher, and wanted to remain anonymous, told Local 6 the teacher shouldn't lose her job.

"She was doing her job. She was teaching a lesson and no way was she out of context, or going across the line. Maybe some parents might think that, but in reality, she was doing her job and she would never mean to scare kids on purpose," said the woman.

It was a lesson that the teacher taught regularly, but we're told it was the first time she used the replica.

"Personally, whenever I was a kid, that would've been acceptable. Why is it that nowadays that everything is just so taboo?" said Beck.

The student handbook prohibits students from bringing "look-a-like" weapons to school. An investigation is underway to see if the teacher's lesson plan is exempt.
 
JaxBill said:
KISSIMMEE, Fla. -

A longtime Osceola County teacher has been reassigned after taking a fake rifle to Neptune Middle School in Kissimmee.

Local 6 has learned the toy musket was used during the history teacher's lesson on the American Revolutionary War. The eighth-grade teacher, identified as Gema Evans, used the prop last week. But this week, students came forward with concerns. The Osceola County School District said several complained that they were frightened by the replica.

"If it was one of those, like a squirt gun looking thing, then by all means, that's fine," said one parent, Lauren Beck.

Another parent, Donna Smith, told Local 6, " I think she took it too far in today's times. Any other time, I would say 'no.'"

A woman who knows the teacher, and wanted to remain anonymous, told Local 6 the teacher shouldn't lose her job.

"She was doing her job. She was teaching a lesson and no way was she out of context, or going across the line. Maybe some parents might think that, but in reality, she was doing her job and she would never mean to scare kids on purpose," said the woman.

It was a lesson that the teacher taught regularly, but we're told it was the first time she used the replica.

"Personally, whenever I was a kid, that would've been acceptable. Why is it that nowadays that everything is just so taboo?" said Beck.

The student handbook prohibits students from bringing "look-a-like" weapons to school. An investigation is underway to see if the teacher's lesson plan is exempt.
SMH

 
Winter Garden woman and her landlord were arrested this week, accused of child abuse after clothing a boy in a dress and makeup as a punishment and posting photos on Facebook, an affidavit states.

According to the affidavit, the boy's uncle reported the photos to police after seeing them online, telling investigators 34-year-old Christle Marie Prado had been dressing the boy as a girl and calling him "Glenda." The pictures, which apparently were taken with a cell phone, showed the boy crying in the dress and makeup, police said.
Police also interviewed Prado, who said it was Driscoll's idea to put the boy in the dress, but admitted taking the pictures. She said she had been "frustrated" because the boy had wet himself several times.
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/breaking-news/os-boy-dressed-as-girl-child-abuse-arrests-20141212-story.html

 
KISSIMMEE, Fla. -

A longtime Osceola County teacher has been reassigned after taking a fake rifle to Neptune Middle School in Kissimmee.

Local 6 has learned the toy musket was used during the history teacher's lesson on the American Revolutionary War. The eighth-grade teacher, identified as Gema Evans, used the prop last week. But this week, students came forward with concerns. The Osceola County School District said several complained that they were frightened by the replica.

"If it was one of those, like a squirt gun looking thing, then by all means, that's fine," said one parent, Lauren Beck.

Another parent, Donna Smith, told Local 6, " I think she took it too far in today's times. Any other time, I would say 'no.'"

A woman who knows the teacher, and wanted to remain anonymous, told Local 6 the teacher shouldn't lose her job.

"She was doing her job. She was teaching a lesson and no way was she out of context, or going across the line. Maybe some parents might think that, but in reality, she was doing her job and she would never mean to scare kids on purpose," said the woman.

It was a lesson that the teacher taught regularly, but we're told it was the first time she used the replica.

"Personally, whenever I was a kid, that would've been acceptable. Why is it that nowadays that everything is just so taboo?" said Beck.

The student handbook prohibits students from bringing "look-a-like" weapons to school. An investigation is underway to see if the teacher's lesson plan is exempt.
Why would the teacher's lesson plan have anything to do with the student handbook?

 
Winter Garden woman and her landlord were arrested this week, accused of child abuse after clothing a boy in a dress and makeup as a punishment and posting photos on Facebook, an affidavit states.According to the affidavit, the boy's uncle reported the photos to police after seeing them online, telling investigators 34-year-old Christle Marie Prado had been dressing the boy as a girl and calling him "Glenda." The pictures, which apparently were taken with a cell phone, showed the boy crying in the dress and makeup, police said.
Police also interviewed Prado, who said it was Driscoll's idea to put the boy in the dress, but admitted taking the pictures. She said she had been "frustrated" because the boy had wet himself several times.
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/breaking-news/os-boy-dressed-as-girl-child-abuse-arrests-20141212-story.html
Seems relevant:http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c2/Glen_or_Glenda.jpg/215px-Glen_or_Glenda.jpg

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Winter Garden woman and her landlord were arrested this week, accused of child abuse after clothing a boy in a dress and makeup as a punishment and posting photos on Facebook, an affidavit states.According to the affidavit, the boy's uncle reported the photos to police after seeing them online, telling investigators 34-year-old Christle Marie Prado had been dressing the boy as a girl and calling him "Glenda." The pictures, which apparently were taken with a cell phone, showed the boy crying in the dress and makeup, police said.
Police also interviewed Prado, who said it was Driscoll's idea to put the boy in the dress, but admitted taking the pictures. She said she had been "frustrated" because the boy had wet himself several times.
http://www.orlandosentinel.com/news/breaking-news/os-boy-dressed-as-girl-child-abuse-arrests-20141212-story.html
Seems relevant:http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/c/c2/Glen_or_Glenda.jpg/215px-Glen_or_Glenda.jpg
Ed Wood is under-appreciated.

 
The Christmas spirit was lacking on Christmas Eve at a Stock Island trailer park.The Monroe County Sheriff's Office says the victim, 20, was playing Xbox games on his front porch in the trailer park at 6500 Maloney Avenue. For no apparent reason, a group of men showed up and began throwing bottles, cans -- and Christmas decorations -- at him.

Herrin said others in the trailer came out when they heard the commotion and "they all began to fight back as the suspects continued to throw things at them."

The Xbox player received five stitches in his head.
 
The Christmas spirit was lacking on Christmas Eve at a Stock Island trailer park.

The Monroe County Sheriff's Office says the victim, 20, was playing Xbox games on his front porch in the trailer park at 6500 Maloney Avenue. For no apparent reason, a group of men showed up and began throwing bottles, cans -- and Christmas decorations -- at him.

Herrin said others in the trailer came out when they heard the commotion and "they all began to fight back as the suspects continued to throw things at them."

The Xbox player received five stitches in his head.
I would pay money to watch that...around $3.78.
 
Woman smears poop in employees faces

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. - A shoplifting suspect, apparently out of options after being confronted by employees, smeared poop in their faces, police said. Marisol Toribio, 32, was arrested Tuesday by Coral Springs police. According to court documents, Toribio was caught stealing from Macy's, so she pulled some poop out of her pants and smeared it on the faces of the loss prevention employees who confronted her

Full story: http://m.local10.com/news/marisol-toribio-smears-poop-in-employees-faces-police-say/30386486

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Woman smears poop in employees faces

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. - A shoplifting suspect, apparently out of options after being confronted by employees, smeared poop in their faces, police said. Marisol Toribio, 32, was arrested Tuesday by Coral Springs police. According to court documents, Toribio (b]was caught stealing from Macy's, so she pulled some poop out of her pants and smeared it on the faces of the loss prevention employees who confronted her

Full story: http://m.local10.com/news/marisol-toribio-smears-poop-in-employees-faces-police-say/30386486
People think working in the LP department is all fun and games, but it also has its share of crappy moments.

 
Woman smears poop in employees faces

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. - A shoplifting suspect, apparently out of options after being confronted by employees, smeared poop in their faces, police said. Marisol Toribio, 32, was arrested Tuesday by Coral Springs police. According to court documents, Toribio was caught stealing from Macy's, so she pulled some poop out of her pants and smeared it on the faces of the loss prevention employees who confronted her

Full story: http://m.local10.com/news/marisol-toribio-smears-poop-in-employees-faces-police-say/30386486
Luckily for her she just happened to have some poop in her pants ready for smearing. Always be prepared.

 

Users who are viewing this thread

Top