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My life after the passing of my wife - 6 years later!!! (1 Viewer)

This is also why I'm a huge fan of organ donation. I don't get people who say no. You're gone. You don't need it anymore. Give it to someone who does.
Amen!

Had the talk with our son tonight about going through the living donor evaluation to see if he's a candidate.  Trying to make sure he understands it will be his decision and we aren't making him do it.  Extremely fine line we're walking.

 
Amen!

Had the talk with our son tonight about going through the living donor evaluation to see if he's a candidate.  Trying to make sure he understands it will be his decision and we aren't making him do it.  Extremely fine line we're walking.
To me this is the greatest gift you can give someone, the gift of life. I'd love nothing more to know that my passing has given life back to a few people. I can only imagine how even better it would be if you saved a loved one's life. Good idea not to push it. Seeing first hand how someone is saving his mother's life ought to do it. :)

 
Ugh, her roommate is annoying.

Thanks for all the well wishes.  Much appreciated.
Aren't they always? The last time I was hospitalized they brought in this lady who was chatty as hell telling her sob story of how she broke her hip in a fluke bike accident over and over. To boot she had diarrhea. I had infection as well and thought wtf? This person with such issues should not be in with me. I put up a stink, not being a bully or mean, but just nice about it and once she was released, they put a note not to give me a roomie unless it's the last resort. The last week I was there I was in peace, well as peaceful as it can be when you are interrupted every hour with taking bp, vitals and changing IV bags and such. And they tell you to rest, get some sleep! Yeah, righto! I'd put in a request for her to be left alone. I don't see why they wouldn't honor it unless they are short on beds.

 
Thinking of you guys this morning. I know how hard the waiting is. I had a bff that needed a heart transplant and minutes felt like hours. May you post good news soon!

 
Thinking of your wife and family. Hang in there as I'm sure you're giving all you have to be strong for her 
I'm doing my best but inside I feel like a fraud.  I try to project strength for her despite not feeling it internally.  Decided she is a much stronger person than I am.

 
I'm doing my best but inside I feel like a fraud.  I try to project strength for her despite not feeling it internally.  Decided she is a much stronger person than I am.
Being by her side is strength. There were times my friend's husband would go MIA and that was ok. He was there for what he could handle and relied on the rest of us to help. She wanted it that way. That's what a support system is about. And I don't know your wife but I'm willing to bet she'd like for you to give yourself a break and credit. Do what you can, but you have to take care of yourself too. Use your support system.

 
Being by her side is strength. There were times my friend's husband would go MIA and that was ok. He was there for what he could handle and relied on the rest of us to help. She wanted it that way. That's what a support system is about. And I don't know your wife but I'm willing to bet she'd like for you to give yourself a break and credit. Do what you can, but you have to take care of yourself too. Use your support system.
You're correct and she does.  I have difficulty asking for help even though it's available in abundance.  I get my breaks hanging out with our son at his bowling tournaments.  

Thank you for your kind words and encouragement.  It truely is appreciated.

 
You're correct and she does.  I have difficulty asking for help even though it's available in abundance.  I get my breaks hanging out with our son at his bowling tournaments.  

Thank you for your kind words and encouragement.  It truely is appreciated.
You'd be amazed how much your support system wants to help your family. I loved it when her husband would call me for favors. And for me even though I'm pretty independent, my bffs beg me to tell them what they can do to help. I think if you ask for help from someone who cares, you'll make their day. Win/Win.

 
She kicked me out early and sent me home to get some sleep.  I haven't been sleeping well and I was starting to nod off.  Heading to bed at 8:30pm on a Saturday night.  Man I'm old.

 
how you making out cheesey?
I'm doing ok, all things considered.  Just completely mentally exhausted.  Putting life on hold while waiting for an organ to become available is very draining and stressful at the same time.  

Hopefully my wife will be discharged in the next day or two.  She felt ok when her Dr. admitted her, it's just her blood counts were whacked.  They got the sodium levels up, now working on the hemoglobin.   She still feels okay, relatively speaking.  Just wants to go home and wait for the call.

I'm out of here early tonight to have dinner with friends.  Eating crap from Wawa, Jimmy Johns and Quick Check alone really blows.  It will be nice to hang with people outside of a hospital setting.

Staff here has been great for the most part.  Just waiting for her main liver specialist to stop by to get the latest update.

Thanks for asking.

 
Looks like she'll be going home tomorrow.  Blood counts are within acceptable levels and stable.  Hopefully nothing else crops up over night.

Her liver doctor signed my wife's temporary disability paperwork.  She will be out of work for up to a year.  Guessing that is dependent upon when the transplant happens and her recovery.  Typical recovery times, as I understand it, are:  surgery is 10-12 hours, 24 hours ICU, 10-14 days hospitalized, weekly doctors visits for a month, and monthly doctors visits for 3-6 months.  

She is eligible for donated leave at work, so hopefully she'll receive enough to cover that time frame at full pay.  I know a bunch of my works friends said they'll donate time.  I assume many of her friends will as well.  The rest is hopefully the generosity of good hearted strangers.

That's all for now.

Thanks,

Cheeseypoof

 
Well that didn't go as planned.  She didn't have a good night.  She developed severe pain in her lower abdomen so now they are trying to figure that out.  Has a CT scan scheduled in about an hour.

It looks like she'll be in the hospital another night, at least.

We just keep plodding along as best we can.

 
Yes.  90% survival after one year, 70% after five years.
Good good.  Hang on to that excellent prognosis for your family.  I know from personal experience that it's very easy to get bogged down in the incredibly unfair here and now, which takes emotions and energy away from focusing on a hopeful future.  Stay strong man.

 
I'm down in that area Mon/Tue and Thursdays....if you wanted to meet up after I get out of work and like....have awkward conversations with some dude you never met...just to break things up and stuff...we can eat Wawa subs in the car together or go somewhere else and eat...or not...just throwing it out there.

Hang in there man.
Any idea on how long the wait for a donor could be? Are we looking at days/weeks/months or years?

 
I'm down in that area Mon/Tue and Thursdays....if you wanted to meet up after I get out of work and like....have awkward conversations with some dude you never met...just to break things up and stuff...we can eat Wawa subs in the car together or go somewhere else and eat...or not...just throwing it out there.

Hang in there man.
Any idea on how long the wait for a donor could be? Are we looking at days/weeks/months or years?
I get the impression from her doctor it's probably in the weeks/months range.  She has my wife listed as desperate and the team is proactive looking for an organ.  But in reality, we really just don't know.  The best option is at this point is a living donor, but that route doesn't seem to be leading anywhere either.

 
From the "You can't make this stuff up" file.  Just received word that my wife's best friend passed away today.  It was not unexpected since she was in hospice care the past few weeks.  Still, not the emotional stress she needs right now.

On a positive note, looks like she'll be discharged from the hospital within the hour.

I'm just completely numb right now.

 
From the "You can't make this stuff up" file.  Just received word that my wife's best friend passed away today.  It was not unexpected since she was in hospice care the past few weeks.  Still, not the emotional stress she needs right now.

On a positive note, looks like she'll be discharged from the hospital within the hour.

I'm just completely numb right now.
sorry for your loss and happy for your wife. hang in there

 

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