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My life after the passing of my wife - 6 years later!!! (1 Viewer)

bananafish said:
Very moving words Mr. Poof. Glad you are finding some peace and moving forward. Good luck with the lady friend.

You must be very proud of your son as well.
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Thank you.  Yes I am.  He's really good kid and following his passion for cooking.  He seemingly thrives in the hectic kitchen environment.

 
Well here we go.  Slightly over 15 months.  A few new things going on.

On the medical front:

My blood pressure has been teetering on the edge of high 1357/75 to 145/80 so my Dr. put me on a low dose of BP medicine.  SO that's been about 6 weeks.  Generally my BP has been between 135/70 to 140/75.  She wants me to lose another 10 pounds and incorporate some exercise.  

Speaking of weight, I have plateaued at around 75 lbs lost, and as low as 82 lbs lost.  Vacations and general life stresses have affected that.  I haven't really been focusing in on losing more, but I know I have to rededicate myself now.  It's all good. 

On the diabetes front.  As a follow up on the blood pressure stuff, they took blood work to check a couple of things.  My fasting blood sugar in the morning had stabilized around 115-120 (before food and meds).  Evening, depending on what I ate and how long after I ate I tested my sugar I would be between 90-130.  So not to bad considering I was at 440 when diagnosed with an 11.1 A1c.  The blood test came back and showed my A1c at 4.9.  So I was directed to stop taking both my diabetes meds.  So apparently i "cured" myself.  But I need to be cognizant of not falling back into old habits.

Work:

Work is good.  The 2 employees I supervise are great and make my job of managing them super easy.  The atmosphere we operate under can get stressful though as we are swamped.  But My managers like the job we're doing and the amount of work we get out.  So that's good.

Personal:

My son is good.  Back at Culinary school and working in the city.  He graduates in June.  Then full time into the work force.

The dating scene sucks, but is seemingly going to get better.  The relationship I was chasing with my long time friend never materialized and essentially blew up about 6 weeks ago.  Screw it.  Her loss based upon what I know of the relationship she stayed in.

Asked another woman out in early September,  After initially agreeing to dinner, she became apprehensive.  A mutual friend that advocated her to me, also advocated me to her.  She eventually came around.  Long story short, we are going to dinner Sunday night.  We'll see how it goes.

Thanks for all your support this past year plus.  I truly appreciate it.

Cheeseypoof.

 
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cheeseypoof said:
Well here we go.  Slightly over 15 months.  A few new things going on.

On the medical front:

My blood pressure has been teetering on the edge of high 1357/75 to 145/80 so my Dr. put me on a low dose of BP medicine.  SO that's been about 6 weeks.  Generally my BP has been between 135/70 to 140/75.  She wants me to lose another 10 pounds and incorporate some exercise.  

Speaking of weight, I have plateaued at around 75 lbs lost, and as low as 82 lbs lost.  Vacations and general life dresses have affected that.  I haven't really been focusing in on losing more, but I know I have to rededicate myself now.  It's all good. 

On the diabetes front.  As a follow up on the blood pressure stuff, they took blood work to check a couple of things.  My fasting blood sugar in the morning had stabilized around 115-120 (before food and meds).  Evening, depending on what I ate and how long after I ate I tested my sugar I would be between 90-130.  So not to bad considering I was at 440 when diagnosed with an 11.1 A1c.  The blood test came back and showed my A1c at 4.9.  So I was directed to stop taking both my diabetes meds.  So apparently i "cured" myself.  But I need to be cognizant of not falling back into old habits.

Work:

Work is good.  The 2 employees I supervise are great and make my job of managing them super easy.  The atmosphere we operate under can get stressful though as we are swamped.  But My managers like the job we're doing and the amount of work we get out.  So that's good.

Personal:

My son is good.  Back at Culinary school and working in the city.  He graduates in June.  Then full time into the work force.

The dating scene sucks, but is seemingly going to get better.  The relationship is was chasing with my long time friend never materialized and essentially blew up about 6 weeks ago.  Screw it.  Her loss based upon what I know of the relationship she stayed in.

Asked another woman out in early September,  After initially agreeing to dinner, she became apprehensive.  A mutual friend that advocated her to me, also advocated me to her.  She eventually came around.  Long story short, we are going to dinner Sunday night.  We'll she how it goes.

Thanks for all your support this past year plus.  I truly appreciate it.

Cheeseypoof.
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So glad you are doing well! Many people shut down after such a tragic loss of a loved one or keep saying they need more time and then the time never comes to try and rebuild their lives back up. But you've taken the bull by the horns in all aspects of your life and are working toward making more improvements. Very admirable.

As far as the dating scene, imo that is the least important. Friendships are far more valuable and if it turns romantic, even better. But as you continue to make strides in all your goals for yourself, you will look and feel better which will lead to more self confidence and becoming more attractive to the opposite sex, and vice versa. Once we reach a certain age it becomes more important that you line up well and are each other's best friend than say in your 20s and maybe 30s.

Take care of yourself and continued best wishes to you and  your son. xxx

 
jamny said:
I would not trust a doctor that suggested BP medicine with those numbers.
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My intention is to try and get off the BP med by the end of the year.  Those were "averages", there were reading that were higher that just happened while in the Drs office.

She was looking at many factors.  My diabetes, weight, life style and activity levels and other issues/concerns I had.  She knows I didn't want to go on it and is working with me to try and be able to get off of them as soon as I can.  And the dose I'm on is the lowest available dose of the med she chose.

 
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major props cheesy!  you really brightened my day!  

we really can heal ourselves, especially if we caused the original problem.  my triglycerides were off the chart 6/7 years ago.  now they are in the low end of normal.  keep at it!

 
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cheeseypoof said:
Dinner went great.  We were at the restaurant from 6-10:30pm just talking.  They were closing the place around us.  Mutually agreed to do it again.  Have been texting back and forth almost constantly since.  Looking promising!  Going to see if she would like to do something on Sunday.
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Nice!

 
cheeseypoof said:
Dinner went great.  We were at the restaurant from 6-10:30pm just talking.  They were closing the place around us.  Mutually agreed to do it again.  Have been texting back and forth almost constantly since.  Looking promising!  Going to see if she would like to do something on Sunday.
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It's truly awesome and inspiring to follow along your progress.   You've made major strides working on your health and are now working on improving things in your personal life.  It's also great to see that things are going well at work and that your son is doing well.  Keep up the great work and please keep us in the loop!! With all of the crazy, stressful negativity going on in the world--it's great to see a person that we are all rooting for doing so well.   

 
cheeseypoof said:
Dinner went great.  We were at the restaurant from 6-10:30pm just talking.  They were closing the place around us.  Mutually agreed to do it again.  Have been texting back and forth almost constantly since.  Looking promising!  Going to see if she would like to do something on Sunday.
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Nice job. Good to hear.

 
jvdesigns2002 said:
It's truly awesome and inspiring to follow along your progress.   You've made major strides working on your health and are now working on improving things in your personal life.  It's also great to see that things are going well at work and that your son is doing well.  Keep up the great work and please keep us in the loop!! With all of the crazy, stressful negativity going on in the world--it's great to see a person that we are all rooting for doing so well.   
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Thank you for the kind words.

She can't go this weekend.  She's working and it's her daughters 18th bday.  They have plans but she suggested after work one night next week.  Look at me go!!! Haha

 
Guess this is as good a time as any to update this thread.

January 24th is 19 months since my wife passed.  A lot has happened since my last update in September.

As previously stated, had blood work done in September.  While my diabetes related numbers were great, my iron and hemoglobin levels were low so my primary ordered a Fecal Occult Blood Test.  That test came back as positive for blood in the stool so I was referred to a GI doc.  The GI scheduled both an upper endoscopy and colonoscopy.

The upper endoscopy was on 11/9.  The results showed areas of non bleeding erosive gastropathy.  Biopsies were negative.  I was put on medication to reduce the acid in my stomach.

The colonoscopy was on 11/20.  The colonoscopy revealed a golf ball size mass partially obstructing the cecum (where the small intestine joins the large intestine).  The biopsy came back negative.  However, I think the GI doc thought it was cancer because he ordered a CEA (carcinoembryonic antigen) blood test and CT scans of my chest, abdomen and pelvis.  The CEA blood test came back normal indicating the Cecal mass wasn't cancer.

CT scans were performed on 12/1.  Had my GI follow up that same day and he had the CT scan results already.  CT scan of the abdomen showed a large mass on my right kidney.  At that point my GI doc essentially punted me to urologists and colon rectal specialists at the University of Pennsylvania.

i made my appointments with Colon Rectal surgeon for 12/22 and Urology on 12/28 and waited seemingly forever.  Bottom line was both the Cecal mass and kidney mass needed to be removed (kidney mass wasn't biopsied which is standard protocol as I understand it).  Combined surgery was scheduled for 1/31 and I started the pre-op testing.  The Urologist ordered an MRI of the right kidney to see how involved the mass was into the inferior vena cava.  Turned out it was much more significant than anticipated so surgery was moved up to 1/17 and they were going to also have a vascular surgeon assist.  The MRI report stated the mass was stage 3 Renal Cell Carcinoma.

So on 1/17 I had a radical nephrectomy to remove my right kidney and a partial colectomy to remove the Cecal mass and the right side of my colon.  The vascular surgeon also had to patch the inferior vena cava.  Surgery was 6 hours long but went very well.

I'm almost a week removed from surgery and I feel really good.  Much better than I was expecting.  Surgery was Wednesday and I was  released from the hospital on Sunday.  There really isn't a lot of pain, just some general soreness when Imstand up or cough.  Getting around ok, albeit slowly.  My return to work date is 3/1.  I see the urologist on 1/25 for my post op visit.  Im assuming the pathology reports on both masses will be in. 

Other fun things that happened during that time period.  

My 20 yo old son was diagnosed as a Type 1 diabetic.  He spend 4 days in the hospital in October.  He came home from school thinking he has food poisoning.  A trip to urgent care discovered his blood sugar was 700+ and his A1c was 16.1.  He's doing great though.  His endocrinologist is pleased with how well he's managing it.

Started dating a woman October first.  Things were going well, I thought.  Sunday of thanksgiving weekend she broke it off out of nowhere.  Essentially she said she couldn't give me what she felt I wanted, needed and deserved in a relationship so she ended it instead to stringing me alone.  Not what I needed to hear in the middle of my medical stuff.  But I eventually decided she messed up and threw away a good guy instead of facing her own issues.  I'm better off in the long run.  The search for a woman is on hold as I work on healing.

I appreciate all the support this board has offered me the past 19 month.

Thanks,

Cheeseypoof 

 
Thank you for the update Cheeseypoof.  I have to tell you that your strength, courage and perseverance are beyond inspiring. The obstacles, hurdles, and tragedies seem to come your way--but you keep fighting and bouncing back--and that is something that is truly admirable.  I think we should change your name from "cheeseypoof" to "bulletproof"--and I mean that as a big compliment.  I wish you the best in regards to your recovery--and I'm glad that your son is okay.  I wouldn't worry too much about the relationship thing as you will have plenty of options for those in the future.  Your family and health are what matters the most.  Best wishes and positive vibes.  

 
I sure hope removing the kidney also removed the problem.  I figure you have great doctors since they have the sense to pass you on to the correct guy when needed.

Hope you are well otherwise.

 
I'm sorry life seems to be serving you a lot of #### sandwiches lately, but the manner in which you gobble them down with a smile on your face is inspiring.  Hoping fate replaces the #### with some delicious Braunschweiger in the near future, man.

 
Mrs. Rannous said:
I sure hope removing the kidney also removed the problem.  I figure you have great doctors since they have the sense to pass you on to the correct guy when needed.

Hope you are well otherwise.
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Thanks.

The doc said they got it all.  There is no sign that it had spread beyond the kidney, so removal is the only treatment.

I forgot to put this in my update.  The kicker to all this medical stuff was, despite the positive test for blood in the stool, I was having no symptoms of either issue.  There was no visible blood in the stool or urine.  No other physiological symptoms whatsoever.  In fact I had been feeling as well as I had in years, so I was floored by the diagnosis.

 
Two weeks after surgery and things are going great.  I've had post op follow up appointments with both the Urologist and Colon Rectal surgeons.  The staples were removed 8 days after surgery.  Both surgeons are extremely pleased with how I'm doing.  At this point I don't need to go back to either doctor, unless another issue arises.

Pathology came back with the expected results.  The cecal mass was not cancerous and the kidney mass was renal cell carcinoma.  The Urologist set up an appointment with an Oncologist at Penn to see if I qualify for any studies/trials for renal cell carcinoma, otherwise there is not further treatment.  I'm willing to participate in a study that involves increased surveillance but don't think I'd want to participate in chemo trial if I don't need to.

Overall I feel great.  No pain.  Minor soreness in my abdomen, mostly when I need to cough.  I'm getting stronger everyday.  Eating regular food with no issues.  I'm amazed at how well, and how quickly, I'm recovering.

Thanks for all the kind words and your continued support.

Cheeseypoof

 
No idea how I missed this whole thread, but what a roller coaster. 

So glad after all this that you and your son are doing well.

 
eoMMan said:
Sweet! From what I hear, UPenn is a top place to go for healthcare. Glad to hear the recovery is going well
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My stepmother was a surgeon there.  I don't think she is anymore and she didn't do colorectal surgeries anyway, so you wouldn't have crossed paths with her.  Which is good, because she's a wicked old hag that, if given my druthers, I would fling filled colostomy bags at.

Glad things are looking up cheeseypoof.  Keep kicking ### at life, GB.

 
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