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A week later, I am still crushed. The perspective of a mixed-race marriage and a loss of trust (2 Viewers)
- Thread starter Koya
- Start date
Da Guru
Fair & Balanced
I stopped watching cable news and shows like TMZ around five years ago. Watch a little local news here and there and read my towns news and sports in the small newspaper. It has made me a much happier, content person. Struggling and agonizing about things I can`t control was depressing me.
Now I feel the same today as I would have if Clinton won. Life goes on..
Now I feel the same today as I would have if Clinton won. Life goes on..
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Zegras11
Footballguy
exactly. This has been a major focus for me the last three years. What you focus on expands, which means I don't really give a #### what Trump thinks or does. I'll just go around doing the best I can help those less fortunate than me.
fantasycurse42
Footballguy Jr.
Koya
Footballguy
No. The rise in racist graffiti, and the active harassment of minority groups has nothing to do with the protests. That's another issue altogether.
FWIW, I'm strongly and vocally against the "not my president" line - by hypocritical to not accept the outcome of the eleciton when you were railing that Trump would do the same, now that the shoe's on the other foot.
I'm talking about the organic racism that has always been under the surface, but now gets a nod of approval because we have a President who gets full on support from the KKK and Nazi orgs and, if not embrace them, hardly distances himself from them... and then picks Bannon.
Please.
SIDA!
Footballguy
ORLY....
Buddy Ball 2K3
Footballguy
No worries bud. Pretty sure wikileaks will show some emails coming from the DNC that they are the ones behind this stuff and are just trying to get people riled up.
Koya
Footballguy
Sorry... personally I have not felt anything direct. Luckily, my wife "looks pretty white" and has not had any issues.
Don't know if that would be the same if she were darker, and/or if our kids turn out to be. That said, there has been a disturbing uptick in these events happening since Trumps election. I can hope it's just a short term thing, but when people here go ahead and laugh at my concerns, then say how they love "winning" - when winning for them clearly seems to entail others losing, makes me far from optimistic.
Just look at those who don't agree with my sentiments in this thread alone. Their tactics, flippancy, language, gloating at my pain (schadenfreude) as if that's a "bonus" in a nation where we should all strive to make one another better, not for one group to rise at the expense (and joy) of another's fall.
Koya
Footballguy
pantherclub
Footballguy
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It seems like you are taking out your frustrations on your long time friend without really giving him much of a chance. You are focusing strictly on one aspect of Trump before he is even in office to see how things work. How many times have candidates spouted crap that never happens once they reach office? All of this is supposition based on campaign issues. I don't like many the things that Trump spouted but there are many factors that go into who people chose to vote for.
The fact you are holding your long time friend responsible for all that is happening is pretty short sighted. I understand you are in conflict but if this is as good of a friend as you have stated he is prior to this you are really doing yourself a disservice by completely disregarding him at this point. He deserves the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise if he was indeed that good of a friend to you.
The fact you are holding your long time friend responsible for all that is happening is pretty short sighted. I understand you are in conflict but if this is as good of a friend as you have stated he is prior to this you are really doing yourself a disservice by completely disregarding him at this point. He deserves the benefit of the doubt until proven otherwise if he was indeed that good of a friend to you.
pantherclub
Footballguy
mr. furley
Footballguy
Card Trader
Footballguy
Koya
Footballguy
I want to do this, and my wife and I have tried to distract from the (in our opinion) very disturbing news. But I'm not one to tune out... if anything, and as noted before, I want to get more involved. Be part of positive change... at the local level which rarely has much to do with Politics and yet is most impactful, to the regional and national stage.
Mind you, I'm not a Liberal either, and voted for Gary Johnson (though, and I've been clear about this, would have voted Hillary has I been in a contested state, begrudgingly so as she's way too establishment big Liberal policies for me)... but my wife is a bleeding heart Lib. She has as much reason behind her policy positions as some of the idiots on this board on the other side (and anything contrary to what she believes is correct, regardless of facts of the matter, is simply wrong and not even worth discussing), which means as much as she and I share these fears, we have very different desired solutions.
NewlyRetired
Footballguy
Again, I might be completely out of touch here because I am a-political but from my perspective people seem to vote for Trump for three main reasons above all else:
1) He was not HRC (who, whether you like it or not, was seen as vile to vote for, for many, as voting for Trump was to Trump haters)
2) He some how connected with the mid west giving them hopes that the job situation would improve
3) A big middle finger "EFF You" to the establishment
I really think the people who voted for Trump because of issues mentioned in the original post are significantly in the minority. There is a decent chance that just as many "nuts" (define this how ever you want) voted for HRC as they did for Trump and I want to believe that number was a small % of both voting blocks.
1) He was not HRC (who, whether you like it or not, was seen as vile to vote for, for many, as voting for Trump was to Trump haters)
2) He some how connected with the mid west giving them hopes that the job situation would improve
3) A big middle finger "EFF You" to the establishment
I really think the people who voted for Trump because of issues mentioned in the original post are significantly in the minority. There is a decent chance that just as many "nuts" (define this how ever you want) voted for HRC as they did for Trump and I want to believe that number was a small % of both voting blocks.
Baloney Sandwich
Footballguy
The SNL skit with Chappelle and Chris Rock comes to mind when reading this thread
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SHG0ezLiVGc
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=SHG0ezLiVGc
RBM
Footballguy
You know what the two worst things we have seen since the election have been? One was the 3-4 blacks pulling the old white guy out of his car and beating the #### out of him like animals because he's white and they assumed he voted Trump. And the other was the black high school girl who beat the crap out of the white high school girl because she supported Trump on social media.
Since you're so quick to judge everyone else in here for not being up to your ####### standards, I think it says a lot about you that neither of those incidents registered enough for you to post a whiny ##### thread about them. I'll say it again, you're too arrogant, obnoxious, and self righteous to ever realize why your side lost. You'd rather just double down. Your crying makes Tim look like Brock Lesnar.
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fatguyinalittlecoat
Footballguy
Koya, thanks for the post. The people telling you to get a grip or to just get over it don't understand that there are millions of people just like you feeling the same way. I'm not sure if I'm really scared about anything but I've been depressed all week. This was bigger than just an ordinary election.
I don't want to stir up trouble, but you voted for Johnson right? Any regrets given the outcome?
I don't want to stir up trouble, but you voted for Johnson right? Any regrets given the outcome?
=Smackdown=
Footballguy
Koya
Footballguy
No. I'm also in a dem stronghold, Jewish area. Does this mean I ignore the fact that there appears to be a number more cases nationally, after seeing the rhetoric Trump has used, bolstered by the appointment of Bannon?
Excuse me for not waiting until I'm directly affected to begin to have concern that I may be.
SIDA!
Footballguy
Koya
Footballguy
I'm not holding my friend responsible for anything more than his vote and his support. In light of that, I can not in good concience think he'd be a good godparent for mixed-race children.
This isn't rocket science people, even if the emotions feel utterly intertwined.
pantherclub
Footballguy
IC FBGCav
Footballguy
I think his hateful comments had much to do with it. Hate and fear sells better than tolerance and equality.
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SIDA!
Footballguy
In The Zone
Footballguy
Andy Dufresne
Footballguy
Even if you think that Trump is exactly the same as Hitler then you have to continue on that path and recognize that neither our democratic institutions nor our entire body politic are anywhere near, as in not remotely close, to the conditions in Germany in the 1920's.
Germany was a homogeneous people - suffering under deplorable conditions - living in a freshly minted, unfamiliar, and unstable democracy - the exact opposite of 2016 America.
By looking at one part of a complex equation you're stereotyping the "opposition", including your friends.
Is Trump racist? Maybe. Even probably. But there were lots of issues in this election and race was way down the list for a lot of people even though it's obviously #1 with a bullet to you. Same with Trump's sexism.
Most Trump voters didn't vote for him because he's racist. They did so IN SPITE OF IT. I think it would behoove you to understand those reasons and not throw the friendship baby out with the bathwater.
Koya
Footballguy
Buddy Ball 2K3
Footballguy
Am I the only one that gets outraged when people so easily minimize who Hitler was and what he did? If you want to say Trump is = to David Duke, ok. But to compare him to someone who is responsible for millions of deaths is a bit sickening.
Grace Under Pressure
Footballguy
Agreed, even with the order. Hopefully Trump can help by denouncing violence on all sides. I see him and Obama working together during the transition as a positive, and hopefully emotions can settle down a bit. I don't think Trump to be a racist, even with his background, but it is concerning that certain factions are still so amped about "winning" the thing. Move on, both sides.
Koya
Footballguy
That's a very good, and positive, piece of advice.
I do understand much more than folks on this board recognize (like I said, at home I am the evil conservative, only here do I encounter the level of Conservative vitriol whereby I feel compelled to respond. The fact that I've become a "hillary defender" when I can't stand her points to that fact)... but, in this case, so too should my friend.
That said, until / unless he disavows his support, this won't change. And I think that's a fair perspective as well.
Hov34
Eephus's Great Great Great Love Child
This, we really give way too much credence to the roll of President - it really is just a figure head, and be it Dem. or Rep. it doesn't really matter - they are both just puppets.
But you are holding him responsible by changing your long time relationship. This election came down to many things and you are only reacting to one aspect. You said you spoke to your friend. Did you talk about the racial aspects directly? Did you give him a chance to explain his feelings and why he voted Trump? If he says, he did because of Trumps racists views then I can understand your point. If that had nothing to do with his vote then why change your view towards him. Everyone had their reasons for why they voted the way they did. The fact you are using this to say he isn't a good person anymore is sad (unless he comes out says he supports the racist portion of the platform but I doubt that to be the case). This was a tough election cycle for everyone. Why push away long time friends over it if it isn't warranted based on their true beliefs?
In The Zone
Footballguy
Koya
Footballguy
Dude, read my posts on this subject and the nuance I interject to attempt to answer your contention before you point it out.
Trumps rhetoric and his divisive approach based on race and ethnicity, his nationalist fervor fueled rise, and his appointment of the godfather of the white-nationalist movement is what I point to, and those can not be countered. They are real, and draw certain parallels, parallels I myself have stated may indeed be quite limited... but parallels nonetheless.
McGarnicle
Footballguy
I do think what we're seeing now is a release of a lot of pent-up emotion. It was a long, drawn out, contentious, hateful and soul-crushing election cycle and now it's finally over. The happy racists are feeling empowered to say racist things, and the ignorant trolls love to gloat. 8 years ago there was a lot of emotion too, obviously of a much different tone and content, but some of it was pretty ridiculous too. Then eventually we all realized nothing really changed, we still have to get up in the morning and go to work. Remember when Obama was going to completely transform Washington? 8 years later, half the electorate is as fed up as ever and willing to vote for an insane baby, because this time dammit, things really need to change. It ain't gonna change. Politics just sucks and it gets more depressing the more you follow it. Life's too short. I wish I could redo the last 18 months and pay zero attention to any of this.
Koya
Footballguy
fruity pebbles
Footballguy
Lol get some rest, you have a long day of moping and posting on facebook ahead
![[icon]](/data/avatars/m/5/5167.jpg?1660313464){kind=avatar}
[icon]
Insoxicated
Holy ####... I've heard some emo kvetching about their presidential candidate losing, but Jesus Christ dude. I expect this crap out of emotionally immature 18yo college kids who are still being coddled in the liberal bosom of the American higher education system..... but aren't you like 40 or 50?
Sorry man, but.... wow.
Sorry man, but.... wow.
fatguyinalittlecoat
Footballguy
I don't agree, but even if they're puppets, they have very different puppeteers.
This, we really give way too much credence to the roll of President - it really is just a figure head, and be it Dem. or Rep. it doesn't really matter - they are both just puppets.
Dr. Octopus
Footballguy
I honestly do not think day to day life for you or your future child will be effected one bit by who is President.
I don't say this to dismiss your feelings. I know it goes deeper than that for you based on your post - but I don't think your friends had ill thoughts by deciding to vote for Trump.
I don't say this to dismiss your feelings. I know it goes deeper than that for you based on your post - but I don't think your friends had ill thoughts by deciding to vote for Trump.
fruity pebbles
Footballguy
I can see that. Its like he labels everyone who votes for Trump as racist, redneck and uneducated.
Koya
Footballguy
I am not changing anything. He made a choice in not just voting for, but vocally supporting someone who has clearly spoken against and incited hatred toward people/families like us.
My only contention is those who did so must accept the responsibility for what they have done. And part of that is the responsibility of, in their judgement, voting for a clear bigot who purposely seeded racial and ethnic divide. I posted in response many times to him and others leading up to the election.
They knew what a vote for Trump meant for me, for my family. They had the right to make their own choice and judgement and they did just that. We both not have to live with those choices.
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