jomar
Footballguy
My oldest son is in 8th grade. This came up kind of quick as he is pretty shy and awkward, but he somehow has a 'girlfriend'. They've been 'dating' for one month and spend a whole lot of time messaging each other on Instagram. We just discovered this in the last week or so. We've read the messages and the theme of almost all of them are: 'I'm not pretty', 'I'm fat', 'no one else likes me but you', 'you are all I have', etc... But there are others where she talks about taking sleeping pills to kill herself, jumping off of the roof of her house, or cutting herself. We talked to our son over the weekend about it but I'm not exactly sure what route to take here. We've told him that this is not normal, she needs some help, and that she is manipulating him. Following their messages since our talk, he seems to believe us but thinks that he can 'save' her. when my wife asked if she has cut herself in the past (something she gleaned from the messages), he said yes but that 'he put a stop to that'.
If I just tell him he can't 'date' this girl, it could make things worse. I'm leaning this direction anyway as he's only in 8th grade so I can play it off like you can't date any girl, not just this one. I'll cut off any lines of communication and they could only talk/see each other at school, not much I can do about that. I could even make him transfer schools if it really came to that.
not really sure what else we can do. From what we've been able to gather, her mom has OD'd twice (or so the gf has said, not sure what she OD'd on if that matters), and she is the 3rd of 3 girls so the parents don't really care too much what she does. Letting the school know could backfire too but I'm just not sure what is the correct way to go here.
what would you do? any advice would be appreciated. thanks in advance
If I just tell him he can't 'date' this girl, it could make things worse. I'm leaning this direction anyway as he's only in 8th grade so I can play it off like you can't date any girl, not just this one. I'll cut off any lines of communication and they could only talk/see each other at school, not much I can do about that. I could even make him transfer schools if it really came to that.
not really sure what else we can do. From what we've been able to gather, her mom has OD'd twice (or so the gf has said, not sure what she OD'd on if that matters), and she is the 3rd of 3 girls so the parents don't really care too much what she does. Letting the school know could backfire too but I'm just not sure what is the correct way to go here.
what would you do? any advice would be appreciated. thanks in advance