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Greater Problem: Toxic Masculinity or Lack of Masculinity (1 Viewer)

Which is the greater problem in 2018 America?

  • Toxic Masculinity

    Votes: 33 47.1%

  • Lack of Masculinity

    Votes: 37 52.9%
  • Total voters
    70
Al O'Pecia

Al O'Pecia

Footballguy
A male coworker recently told me that he's boycotting the NFL this season.  I know that he's into woke politics so I asked him if his boycott was because of the National Anthem controversy.

He replied, "No, I'm boycotting the NFL because it promotes toxic masculinity."

He was serious.

Then, this morning, I saw a comment that read:

43% of boys are raised by single mothers.

78% of teachers are female.

So almost 50% of boys have 100% feminine influence while at home &  an 8/10ish influence while at school.

Toxic masculinity isn't the problem. Lack of masculinity is.

(Ignore the statistics being slightly off and just consider the point being made.)

In 2018 America which is the greater societal ill: Toxic Masculinity or Lack of Masculinity?

 
For me the greatest problem is not knowing there was a problem with masculinity.  Seriously.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Ilov80s said:
Right as usual with these polls, it is far too simplistic. 
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Comments are for expanding thoughts on the subject which you're free to do.  Poll questions, which are limited by total character restrictions, are really just to get the conversation started.

 
I wouldn't stop watching football over it, but he is right that football is definitely near the epitome of "toxic masculinity". These guys destroy their bodies and often their minds and they sometimes intentionally try to hurt their co-workers. Ofcourse they do it for money, but lots of them would do it even if it didn't pay very well just because they love the game. Think about some of the old school heroes of the game. Guys choosing to amputate part of a finger as not miss a day of work, guys who legends because they would bite and spit on leaguemates, etc. Those old school guys didn't even make that much money either. 

 
Al O'Pecia said:
Comments are for expanding thoughts on the subject which you're free to do.  Poll questions, which are limited by total character restrictions, are really just to get the conversation started.
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I am certainly not blaming you for it- it is just a problem with polls in general. One question I might pose: is there a connection between toxic masculinity and the fact that there are so many single moms and disproportinate female teachers? Is there something bad about the stereotypical male gender idenity that causes them not to want to become teachers and not want to stick around to parent their kids?

 
belljr said:
wth is toxic masculinity
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The idea that the stereotypical role for guys can often lead them harm. Like the idea men aren't suppossed to express emotions except anger, that men should be aggressive and competitive, that men believe they are the dominant gender, etc. There is some research to show that men who strongly buy into a very traditional male role have more psychological problems (depression, drug abuse, etc).

 
Lack of masculinity is definitely the issue and it starts young. Woman at work post pics of her kid All the time on social media and he is either crying or has a look of terror on his face. Examples, "oh look,  little junior is frightened of the birds, I just want to hug him". Oh mommy leaving the house, junior is crying  because he can never be a foot away from her. Oh look, the sun is out but junior hides behind mommy because he plays video games all day and hasn't seen that bright orb before. And you can tell she makes it worse by coddling him. Scary part is, he has a dad. 

 
The problem is the lack of middle ground between the two poll options.   Sometimes not enough "traditional masculinity" is bad and sometimes too much of it is bad.  Balance is good.  

The problem isn't with either one of them, specifically.  It's that people are horrible for a variety of reasons.  

 
Just hold your head up high and be proud of who you are. Harbor a code of ethics, set personal goals and live up to them and you'll be fine. After that, just be sure you know how to swim good - because look out for the tidal wave of p*ssy that's coming your way.. also be sure to eat quality foods and get plenty of rest at night! Good luck!

 
Do we need a pole asking "How did you learn about TSS?" Probably not.

ETA: :bag:  

 
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Being a decent, functioning human being isn't gender specific. Glossing over swaths of behavioral problems with terms like "toxic masculinity" or "lack of masculinity" gets you off on the wrong foot from the start. Rather than focusing on what those terms mean, it'd be more productive if a person was specific about behaviors, actions, etc. they find undesirable.

 
Gr00vus said:
Being a decent, functioning human being isn't gender specific. Glossing over swaths of behavioral problems with terms like "toxic masculinity" or "lack of masculinity" gets you off on the wrong foot from the start. Rather than focusing on what those terms mean, it'd be more productive if a person was specific about behaviors, actions, etc. they find undesirable.
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In addition, I've found people (not you, OP) that harp on both concepts to be either misandrist or misogynist in some way. 

 
belljr said:
wth is toxic masculinity
Click to expand...
You know when a man feels like he has to sacrifice all of his dreams so he can be a provider for his wife and kids even though she’s perfectly capable of helping with the bills or even being the main breadwinner, or he’d be happier as a stay at home dad and he’d be great at it but he can’t admit it so he works a job that makes him miserable and won’t let her go back to work instead because he’s “being a man”?

 
Henry Ford said:
You know when a man feels like he has to sacrifice all of his dreams so he can be a provider for his wife and kids even though she’s perfectly capable of helping with the bills or even being the main breadwinner, or he’d be happier as a stay at home dad and he’d be great at it but he can’t admit it so he works a job that makes him miserable and won’t let her go back to work instead because he’s “being a man”?
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Good definition. Not what I was thinking, I was thinking more along the lines of Terry Crews but if he were unwilling to talk about the crap he put up with. 

 
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Definitely lack of. Guys spend their time playing video games instead of working out, learning about cars, hitting on chicks, etc.

Then, they go out into the world and fail to meet expectations and lash out at society.

 
Henry Ford said:
You know when you’re at a bar and one bro bumps into another bro and a quarter ounce of beer sloshes out of bro2’s cup and it leads to two guys getting arrested for fighting in a bar and one of their girlfriends gets an elbow in the face trying to stop them?
Click to expand...
Henry Ford bringing the funny.  :lmao:

 
Stuart Ullman said:
Definitely lack of. Guys spend their time playing video games instead of working out, learning about cars, hitting on chicks, etc.

Then, they go out into the world and fail to meet expectations and lash out at society.
Click to expand...
Would you say the incel movement is toxic or lack of?

 
Look:

I'm "masculine" in a lot of ways. I have some sweet-### Homer Simpson stubble that pops back up 10 seconds after I shave, I love to crush vage, I like sports and gambling, I have a deep, dopey-### voice. But there's nothing wrong with NOT being masculine, if you're a male. Some dudes are sort of effeminate or metro. Some women like that. It's fine.

There's plenty of masculinity to go around. If toxic masculinity is defined by being restricted emotionally, being violent, or having retrograde attitudes towards women and/or sex, then toxic masculinity is inherently a bad thing. 

But, the question is poorly formed. You can also be a complete ####head, like someone said, and it can not have anything to do with how masculine or non-masculine you are.

 
Regardless of the answer to this particular question, we love to analyze the #### out of everything in this society.

These issues have existed for 100 years and they'll exist 100 more.  Just way more people are "woke" now to those that deviate from traditional roles and these "woke" folks seem to need to stereotype, blame, and make fun of those they deem different.  

It's almost like they're bullies.

It's always been challenging to be a man's man in this country and it always will.  Some struggle with it very much and end up in one of Henry's scenarios. 

 
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