What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Welcome to Our Forums. Once you've registered and logged in, you're primed to talk football, among other topics, with the sharpest and most experienced fantasy players on the internet.

What’s the penalty here? Halloween edition (1 Viewer)

Otis

Otis

Footballguy
So these privileged fat kids pillaged our candy bucket tonight. My bad for not putting a stupid TAKE ONE sign, but it’s pretty clear these animals knew what they were doing. Some more diverse kids, probably from the next town over, came afterwards and didn’t get any candy. This isn’t a race relations thing though; it’s a fat kids with no respect thing. Also, minus brain points for being hockey fans  

My bad for not bringing the candy bucket in. We had been out trick or treating with our girls, and had just gotten home and were going through the mayhem that is their various bedtime routines. The bucket was completely full when we got home and I just assumed low traffic year and I would take it in after the girls are all in bed. 

I hope these beasts end up in juvie where they belong. These guys remind me of a 13 year old Brett Kavanaugh.  You just know he did this  

Happy Halloween!

 
Damnit. It didn’t show the whole video and didn’t include sound. 

- they were marveling at the candy. I forget what it was or which that excited them, but it was like OH MAN REESES or some nonsense. Insert whatever candy is popular in the shuke candy ranking threads. 

- after they were startled and ran away, they came back to finish the job. 

 
Rirruto said:
They're too old to trick or treat anyway. Hunt them down and egg their houses. 
Click to expand...
No such thing as too old. It’s better that teenagers are out trick or treating as  opposed to running around the neighborhood shirtless with homemade sharpened spears, tripping on acid and destroying every pumpkin in the neighborhood like My friends and I did.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
DA RAIDERS said:
100% your fault.  there is no other outcome.  
Click to expand...
Well there is one other outcome actually. Like if it were me or my kids and we weren’t total a—holes. And we took a few. And not the whole bucket. 

That’s a different outcome. Though I understand you and many Americans like you raise your kids to behave this way and think it’s totally fine. Hence the predicament we’re in currently. 

 
Sounds like it was near the end of the official trick or treating prescribed time frame.

As such, they realized that if they didn't take that candy, the fat guy that lived in the house would gorge himself on that candy - and probably that very night.

I commend them for their selfless and forward thinking. ?

 
Otis said:
Well there is one other outcome actually. Like if it were me or my kids and we weren’t total a—holes. And we took a few. And not the whole bucket. 

That’s a different outcome. Though I understand you and many Americans like you raise your kids to behave this way and think it’s totally fine. Hence the predicament we’re in currently. 
Click to expand...
nope.  100% your fault

and it aint my kid either.  unusually stinky bait there.

 
a couple halloween back we put out one bowl with candy (people) and one bowl with bones (dog). so jimmy and me go do our trick of treating and when we get back the candy bowl was full but all them bones were gone. I look at jimmy like dang, can you believe it? we must have had like 50 dogs come over. later that night jimmy say he gotta meet someone. so I am sitting there watching pumpkinhead and I hear some growlin in the back yard. i look out and there is somethin happening at the back fence. I grab my night vision and I see it's jimmy, pabalo and couple other dog i never met. They was dividing up the bones that we left in that bowl at our house. Just like that movie Heat. Jimmy comes in and I am waiting for him. I'm like jimmy, I saw you with them bones. Why you steal them? He played dumb but I told him I saw him in the night vision that he gave me for my birthday so he have to admit it. I'm like lol why didn't you just ask me for the bones? You didn't have to steal them. He say didnt know what the halloween rules were. He say that dogs don't get it. While he was saying that I remembered we had like 12 bags of chuck wagons suddenly disapear a few years before and I bet jimmy tipped pabalo off to teh load. dogs is mans best friend but when you aint lookin theyll take everything.

 
Otis said:
So these privileged fat kids pillaged our candy bucket tonight. My bad for not putting a stupid TAKE ONE sign, but it’s pretty clear these animals knew what they were doing. Some more diverse kids, probably from the next town over, came afterwards and didn’t get any candy. This isn’t a race relations thing though; it’s a fat kids with no respect thing. Also, minus brain points for being hockey fans  

My bad for not bringing the candy bucket in. We had been out trick or treating with our girls, and had just gotten home and were going through the mayhem that is their various bedtime routines. The bucket was completely full when we got home and I just assumed low traffic year and I would take it in after the girls are all in bed. 

I hope these beasts end up in juvie where they belong. These guys remind me of a 13 year old Brett Kavanaugh.  You just know he did this  

Happy Halloween!
Click to expand...
You know, it IS possible for you to split the duties. I handed out the candy while Mrs. Servo took the boys around the hood.

Your penalty is to stand in line at Circuit City on Black Friday.

 
Otis said:
Well there is one other outcome actually. Like if it were me or my kids and we weren’t total a—holes. And we took a few. And not the whole bucket. 

That’s a different outcome. Though I understand you and many Americans like you raise your kids to behave this way and think it’s totally fine. Hence the predicament we’re in currently. 
Click to expand...
He actually thinks his kid wouldn't have taken the whole bucket if he wasn't around. ?

 
Last edited by a moderator:
You are lucky kids like me don't live in your neighborhood. We would have taken the candy and egged your house for being to lazy too answer the door.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Seems like everyone won.

Kids got more candy from your house than they expected. 

You didn't have to answer the door and got to go trick or treating with your family. You also didn't end up eating a bunch of candy that was left over because not enough kids came to your house. 

 
I was going to say leave a bucket of potatoes next year, but then you’d probably end up with broken windows.  Maybe baked potatoes?

 
Weebs210 said:
You are lucky kids like me don't live in your neighborhood. We would have taken the candy and egged your house for being to lazy too answer the door.
Click to expand...
I agree.  We are all lucky kids like you don't live in our neighborhoods.

Edit: that came off meaner than I meant it, reading it back.  My apologies if I offended.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Oh, but on the candy - when you leave a bucket out, you also leave a bag of candy in the house in case of something like this.  Then if it gets emptied and you come home, you have candy for the "diverse" kids you now feel guilty about.

 
Otis, you should become like an old Kung Fu movie hero.  It's now your mission to find the criminals who've taken so much from you.  You must track them down, encounter each one separately, and engage them in a Kung Fu battle til death or submission.  You must take each of these thugs out for you to regain your family's honor.

Get it all on video and post it here. Definite "Thread of the Year" candidate.

 
How are we supposed to believe you when you aren't even capable of posting the video?

 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Lehigh98
The Battle Against Teens and Screens
Replies
17
Views
627
Jayrod
Jayrod
AndrewClark
Putting together Halloween "buckets" for kids in my neighborhood. Need non candy suggestions.
Replies
5
Views
207
The Z Machine
The Z Machine
GordonGekko
How Has The Widespread Normalization Of Social Media Impacted Your Life / Your Children's Lives? (22/30)
Replies
4
Views
377
GordonGekko
GordonGekko

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 2 (members: 0, guests: 2)
Top