What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Welcome to Our Forums. Once you've registered and logged in, you're primed to talk football, among other topics, with the sharpest and most experienced fantasy players on the internet.

Son has a transgendered child in his kindergarten class (1 Viewer)

fantasycurse42

fantasycurse42

Footballguy Jr.
I live in one of the most liberal areas in the country & I’m fairly liberal with my social views. I also have no issues at all with transgendered individuals, but I feel 5 years old is a little young for this kind of major decision to be made. 

Was just looking at school pictures with my son and I ask, who’s this child? He tells me that’s xyz, I’m just like oh okay. I ask my wife, do you know xyz is a girl? She tells me yes, I’ve told you about xyz, he has a transgendered child in his class, you never listen to anything I say. Xyz has been dressing as a girl her whole life, with the makeup and growing her hair long, & dresses, etc. 

I’m sorry Mrs Curse, this conversation would’ve registered, we never discussed this. 

Anyways, these liberal ######## parents have basically decided to turn their boy into a girl, from what I’ve gathered. At 2, 3, 4, 5 years old, this isn’t really a decision a child makes without the influence of parents. These parents disgust me, I can only imagine the conversations these super liberal yuk yuks have - oh Jimmy wants to be a girl, we have this amazing transgendered child and we’re so proud. That’s how I can picture their conversations going. 

This board is pretty liberal, is my line of thinking wrong? Just looking for some perspective.

 
we talking  surgery or just how they dress and act?  Seems early but we have a friend of the family who went from girl to boy (not sure if she had any work done, not that close) but her mom said since she was old enough to talk she said she felt like a boy trapped in a girls body.  Wasn’t until late teens she made the switch

 
Our girls are in middle school and while there aren’t any definitive transgender kids there are a few self proclaimed bi-sexual kids. 

I’m not suggesting they aren’t or won’t be, but I just can’t fathom the idea that you can definitively decide that you’re bisexual if you’ve never actually had sex. I remember this being a thing with mostly girls when I was their age too. 

Its almost a attention whoring thing, imo.

Again, and I should probably make this my signature, I’m a cro magnon in this day and age so I could be and more than likely I am either wrong, insensitive, or both.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
fantasycurse42 said:
What assumptions?
Click to expand...
Anyways, these liberal ######## parents have basically decided to turn their boy into a girl, from what I’ve gathered. At 2, 3, 4, 5 years old, this isn’t really a decision a child makes without the influence of parents. These parents disgust me, I can only imagine the conversations these super liberal yuk yuks have - oh Jimmy wants to be a girl, we have this amazing transgendered child and we’re so proud. That’s how I can picture their conversations going. 

 
Dan Lambskin said:
we talking  surgery or just how they dress and act?  Seems early but we have a friend of the family who went from girl to boy (not sure if she had any work done, not that close) but her mom said since she was old enough to talk she said she felt like a boy trapped in a girls body.  Wasn’t until late teens she made the switch
Click to expand...
As far as I know, dress and act, basically her entire life. 

 
Sinn Fein said:
Anyways, these liberal ######## parents have basically decided to turn their boy into a girl, from what I’ve gathered. At 2, 3, 4, 5 years old, this isn’t really a decision a child makes without the influence of parents. These parents disgust me, I can only imagine the conversations these super liberal yuk yuks have - oh Jimmy wants to be a girl, we have this amazing transgendered child and we’re so proud. That’s how I can picture their conversations going. 
Click to expand...
So a 2 year old is capable of making these decisions.

Your opinion is noted and appreciated.

 
I have a friend with a 4 year old girl that insists on dressing, playing and acting like a boy.   Haircut,  clothes and everything.

parents are not liberal and are actually concerned with the potential issues that come along with this.

Some kids are just born like this, guy.  Pull your head out.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Before a child is born, they get zero say in the decisions that effect their life. The moment they are born, they can decide whatever they want. 

Please pass the cake. 

 
Too young at age two to decide what gender. Boys play dress up all the time. 

This sounds exactly like FC42 is describing it. If this persists into the pubescent years, then yes, there's consideration to be had. But both boys and girls play with gender roles at young ages all of the time and wind up perfectly in line with their biological sex.  

 
fantasycurse42 said:
My wife showed me pictures on FB of this child from 2014, being dressed as a girl with makeup, etc - the parents are “deciding” their boy is a girl. 
Click to expand...
The boy is five now, so there’s pictures of “her”in makeup at 1 years old? That would off even for a biological girl.

 
Walking Boot said:
There was a really good Frontline episode on this. One of the kids they talked to was maybe 8 or 9, born a boy, felt he should have been a girl. Just from the interviews... you could absolutely tell. I would imagine it would have been obvious even younger. 
Click to expand...
In this case, per the OP, they were dressing the child as a girl beginning at the age of one (2014). That's a parental decision, not one the kid has made.

 
fantasycurse42 said:
I live in one of the most liberal areas in the country & I’m fairly liberal with my social views. I also have no issues at all with transgendered individuals, but I feel 5 years old is a little young for this kind of major decision to be made. 

Was just looking at school pictures with my son and I ask, who’s this child? He tells me that’s xyz, I’m just like oh okay. I ask my wife, do you know xyz is a girl? She tells me yes, I’ve told you about xyz, he has a transgendered child in his class, you never listen to anything I say. Xyz has been dressing as a girl her whole life, with the makeup and growing her hair long, & dresses, etc. 

I’m sorry Mrs Curse, this conversation would’ve registered, we never discussed this. 

Anyways, these liberal ######## parents have basically decided to turn their boy into a girl, from what I’ve gathered. At 2, 3, 4, 5 years old, this isn’t really a decision a child makes without the influence of parents. These parents disgust me, I can only imagine the conversations these super liberal yuk yuks have - oh Jimmy wants to be a girl, we have this amazing transgendered child and we’re so proud. That’s how I can picture their conversations going. 

This board is pretty liberal, is my line of thinking wrong? Just looking for some perspective.
Click to expand...
"XYZ has been dressing as a girl her whole life"

and

"these liberal ######## parents have basically decided to turn their boy into a girl"

are completely contradictory statements.

Also, when you say "this isn't really a decision a child makes without the influence of parents", you are undermining the conservative theory that boy/girl dynamics are genetic.

 
Walking Boot said:
There was a really good Frontline episode on this. One of the kids they talked to was maybe 8 or 9, born a boy, felt he should have been a girl. Just from the interviews... you could absolutely tell. I would imagine it would have been obvious even younger. 
Click to expand...
I watched that hoping to understand the phenomenon a little better, came away thinking there was some overstepping into grey areas of hormonal identity that science has yet to define clearly enough for those kind and timings of choices. Still believe that there's too much minding the business of others in this and society in general. The 'tolerant' appear to be using too little judgement in their enthusiasm for personal liberty and the 'decent' will always be using too much until they consider tolerance a part of decency.

 
I know, sadly, that everything is a right/left issue now. But this really doesn't seem like it should be. I'm sure there are plenty of studies that have been done that show when children develop gender identity. 

I have no idea if 5 is too young or not. But before declaring it absolutely is and this is crazy, it seems like I'd want to do some research to see what the science says.

 
STEADYMOBBIN 22 said:
Our girls are in middle school and while there aren’t any definitive transgender kids there are a few self proclaimed bi-sexual kids. 

I’m not suggesting they aren’t or won’t be, but I just can’t fathom the idea that you can definitively decide that you’re bisexual if you’ve never actually had sex. I remember this being a thing with mostly girls when I was their age too. 

Its almost a attention whoring thing, imo.

Again, and I should probably make this my signature, I’m a cro magnon in this day and age so I could be and more than likely I am either wrong, insensitive, or both.
Click to expand...


You don't middle school aged children are understanding/comprehending their sexuality? Whether or not they've had sex?

Are you straight? Did you need to have sex with a man before you could figure that out?

 
When I was 5 years old, I knew that I did not want to wear the same kinds of clothes that the girls in kindergarten wore. If my parents had tried to make me wear a dress, I would have taken it off as soon as possible. I can't imagine any non-LGBTQ boy feeling any differently.

 
We have 2 in my small NJ town, that i know of.

One the girls is like 4 and wants to be a boy. Actually hard to tell when the kid is running around with all the other kids.

My wife talks to the parents a bit and they're not super liberal or whatever unfortunate stereotype people want to label others as. 

Parents are having a difficult time with it but making the best of it. Basically playing along and following the lead of the child.

This has been going on for a few years now. Kid is probably 6 or 7 now? Family is well adjusted. Has other kids. Seems like they are dealing with it as best as they can, they haven't declared anything. I almost think other people have a harder time than they do with it.

That age does seem young to make any rash decision but all i can say, selfishly, is im glad i don't have to deal with it. If the alternative is to fight daily and insist on dressing the kid up in a skirt, growing her hair out and telling her she is a girl to the point the kid is daily in tears...i think i too would play along early on. That kid runs around playing with all the other kids and it's beautiful. It's the adults that make the situation ugly. The kid is loved by his parents, family and friends.

I don't fully understand that type situation and for everyone's sake i hope OP keeps his ignorant feelings to himself. I don't like to judge what other people do too much when i don't have to deal with it myself.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Educate yourself a little

This is clearly not something you know much about and it's strange (though not surprising) to have such a strong opinion on something like that.

Most transgenders know it early on, and yes, as early as 2-3 years of age. It's not a decision they make. 

Ask yourself this:  Do you think parents WANT their own kids to have to go through this? Even the most "liberal" parents don't go about trying to change the gender of their kid for no reason. These kinds of decisions are also made with the help of people in the field that deal with it on a regular basis. 

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Victory is the favorite pursuit of mankind. The second favorite pursuit of mankind is finding excuses for losing. When i was in adolescent psych - 30 yrs ago when everyone was underdiagnosed - i met with a lot of parents who had been dealing with a difficult child for a decade or more and were drowning in the business's inability to find sufficing labels and treatments. There was a reason for that - the cure for most juvenile behavioral problems is time - but parents were becoming more & more frustrated and impatient. The schools actually started the overdiagnosis/instant pharma phenomenon, but the psych profession quickly pursued such a beautiful dollar, especially since HMOs were beginning to clamp down on long-term inpatient care for brats, borderlines & incorrigibles.

Now diagnoses have become largely fads and, worse, self-fulfilling prophecies. Once guidance counselors who resolved 3 yrs of college partying by getting a teacher cert in their 4th but didn't want to grade papers started throwing around disorder initials, the size of the pharma industry & the DSM (Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) instantly doubled. The 'science' behind labeling is little less anecdotal than it was 30 years ago and, like most things in American society, is customer driven. Parents want answers, answers are provided - correct, destructive, invented or no. The industry serving the second favorite pursuit of mankind is booming & false. I fear this ugly phenomenon to cross over into the very delicate world of hormonal spectrums and do an awful lot of harm.

 
wikkidpissah said:
Victory is the favorite pursuit of mankind. The second favorite pursuit of mankind is finding excuses for losing. When i was in adolescent psych - 30 yrs ago when everyone was underdiagnosed - i met with a lot of parents who had been dealing with a difficult child for a decade or more and were drowning in the business's inability to find sufficing labels and treatments. There was a reason for that - the cure for most juvenile behavioral problems is time - but parents were becoming more & more frustrated and impatient. The schools actually started the overdiagnosis/instant pharma phenomenon, but the psych profession quickly pursued such a beautiful dollar, especially since HMOs were beginning to clamp down on long-term inpatient care for brats, borderlines & incorrigibles.

Now diagnoses have become largely fads and, worse, self-fulfilling prophecies. Once guidance counselors who resolved 3 yrs of college partying by getting a teacher cert in their 4th but didn't want to grade papers started throwing around disorder initials, the size of the pharma industry & the DSM (Diagnostic & Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders) instantly doubled. The 'science' behind labeling is little less anecdotal than it was 30 years ago and, like most things in American society, is customer driven. Parents want answers, answers are provided - correct, destructive, invented or no. The industry serving the second favorite pursuit of mankind is booming & false. I fear this ugly phenomenon to cross over into the very delicate world of hormonal spectrums and do an awful lot of harm.
Click to expand...
If this child has a juvenile behavioral problem, and the cure for most juvenile behavioral problems is time, then it seems like the parents are doing the right thing by letting the child wear a dress. If it's just a phase, then the child will naturally gravitate towards jeans and fire engines in a matter of time.

 
TripItUp said:
I have a friend with a 4 year old girl that insists on dressing, playing and acting like a boy.   Haircut,  clothes and everything.

parents are not liberal and are actually concerned with the potential issues that come along with this.

Some kids are just born like this, guy.  Pull your head out.
Click to expand...
Playing or acting like a boy doesn’t equal being a boy, though.  If it’s just actions at this point, I don’t see much harm. If they start some form of conversion at that age though, that’s concerning. 

 
Last edited by a moderator:
[scooter] said:
If this child has a juvenile behavioral problem, and the cure for most juvenile behavioral problems is time, then it seems like the parents are doing the right thing by letting the child wear a dress. If it's just a phase, then the child will naturally gravitate towards jeans and fire engines in a matter of time.
Click to expand...
sry - guess i didn't do a good enough job making my point. did not mean to suggest that hormonal spectrum issues are behavorial problems in any way. only made the point in that way to highlight parental impatience for answers in developmental matters

 
Last edited by a moderator:
wikkidpissah said:
[scooter] said:
If this child has a juvenile behavioral problem, and the cure for most juvenile behavioral problems is time, then it seems like the parents are doing the right thing by letting the child wear a dress. If it's just a phase, then the child will naturally gravitate towards jeans and fire engines in a matter of time.
Click to expand...
sry - guess i didn't do a good enough job making my point. did not mean to suggest that hormonal spectrum issues are behavorial problems in any way. only made the point in that way to highlight parental impatience for answers in developmental matters
Click to expand...
Do we know that "parental impatience" applies to the subject of this thread? It seems to me that the parents are being very patient by letting the child behave like a girl.

 
[scooter] said:
Do we know that "parental impatience" applies to the subject of this thread? It seems to me that the parents are being very patient by letting the child behave like a girl.
Click to expand...
In the PBS special on the topic that was brought up here, there was a wide spectrum of parental reactivity - some patient, some hurried.

 
whoknew said:
You don't middle school aged children are understanding/comprehending their sexuality? Whether or not they've had sex?

Are you straight? Did you need to have sex with a man before you could figure that out?
Click to expand...
Very good point. I just don’t think a 12-14 year old going through puberty knows enough about themselves to make a declaration of their sexual preferences. Certainly not concrete enough to announce it to their classmates. 

Again, I could be wrong, these are just my immediate thoughts on a subject that I fortunately don’t have to worry about so far.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
STEADYMOBBIN 22 said:
Our girls are in middle school and while there aren’t any definitive transgender kids there are a few self proclaimed bi-sexual kids. 

I’m not suggesting they aren’t or won’t be, but I just can’t fathom the idea that you can definitively decide that you’re bisexual if you’ve never actually had sex. I remember this being a thing with mostly girls when I was their age too. 

Its almost a attention whoring thing, imo.

Again, and I should probably make this my signature, I’m a cro magnon in this day and age so I could be and more than likely I am either wrong, insensitive, or both.
Click to expand...
did you not decide that you were heterosexual until you actually had sex?

 
I wouldn’t worry about it. Let them deal with their kid and you yours. Obviously if yours asks you about it address it however you feel is appropriate. 

FTR I think the whole identifying as thing is a mental illness in 99% of the trans folks. We don’t tell people that hear voices that they are indeed real and should listen to them. That being said I also believe those people should be able to live their lives as they wish. 

 
I think if the parents were dressing their male son in dresses and makeup when the child was an infant, then I think your disgust is warranted. However, if this child came to the conclusion he wanted to dress this way when he was-3-4, then I think these parents should be applauded for being forward thinking enough to not force their child to conform. I mean how do you know these parents aren't completely crushed with these developments?  I think you don't have enough info to make assumptions.

One of my 14 year old daughter's good friends is transgender. I feel terrible for her. Her parents live close by and they are bikers--I mean the whole Sons of Anarchy type scene and she has already told us she can't talk to them about this. So she hides it, but when she comes to our house (which is becoming more and more often), we call her Danny. 

 
Appreciate those that actually posted links or actual opinions without being ##### about it. 

The rest of this thread is about where I expected. Love when someone pulls out a decade old alias to post their opinion twice.

But again, I don’t think a child makes the choice to be dressed like a girl for their holiday photos right around 2 years old, that feels like a parental decision. 

 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

G
Help for a heartsick dad
Replies
47
Views
1K
Jaysus
Jaysus
GordonGekko
How Should Children Be Trained And Taught To Handle Bullies? (14/30)
Replies
9
Views
559
GordonGekko
GordonGekko
BobbyLayne
WEDDING PLANNING ADVICE Calling all FBG women, trans, cross dressers - if you wear dresses, get in here (NTTAWWT but I’m str8)
Replies
31
Views
509
Pip's Invitation
Pip's Invitation

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 2 (members: 0, guests: 2)
Top