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You've been stranded on an island for a year (1 Viewer)

TheIronSheik

TheIronSheik

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There's only been coconuts, fish and maybe some bacon from boars that, when they die, their meat cooks instantly into bacon.

On day 367 (yes, it was a leap year), a boat comes into view.  You know your time of solitude is over as you being to wave wildly at the freighter and it turns course to you.  A small boat eventually lands on shore to whisk you away, back to the boat, and happiness flows through your entire core.  As you approach the vessel, the savior sailor says to you, "You must be starving.  We have pretty much everything on this ship.  What can I get you to eat?"

So, you can ask for anything that is not prepared food.  This is something that can be given to you right away.  Because of some weird regulation that the ship goes by, you can only request out one item at a time.  So no asking for multiple things.  You eat something.  Than you can request something else later.  The captain doesn't believe in wasting things so he's strict on this rule and will not break it for any reason.

What's the one thing you want after being away for a year?

I'm not sure if I'd go sweet with a Snickers bar.  Or salty with Pringles.    

 
All that bacon I consumed likely satisfied my desire for salt, so I'll go with something sweet. 

And for that, only a dark Reeses PB cup will do the trick. 

 
Godsbrother said:
Wait a minute, that wasn't in the original scenario, that's cheating!   Oh hell: if there is a lactating breast there, whether male or female,  , I'll go for it. 
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I thought it was common knowledge that sea men was associated with males.

 
If I haven't talked myself crazy in my own head yet, prime rib. End Cut. Med/med rare. Thanks. Easy peeze.

 
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Ramblin Wreck said:
Raw meat?   Can't be something that is prepared.
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Maybe I learned Jedi mind tricks on the island or convinced myself in a fit of crazy that I no longer needed terms or conditions.

If so, I'm probably going for ice cream cake of the Coldstone Creamery variety. Assuming unprepared.

If need be, then cookies and cream ice cream will suffice. 

 
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Ice cream is a solid choice.

I was going to say cheeseburger or spaghetti and meatballs if prepared was allowed.

 
I don't understand the "not a prepared food".  Does that mean cheeseburgers are out?  Can I ask for ground beef, cheese, and buns and cook one myself?  Are we not allowed to use condiments, salt & pepper, etc?

 
Buckychudd said:
I don't understand the "not a prepared food".  Does that mean cheeseburgers are out?  Can I ask for ground beef, cheese, and buns and cook one myself?  Are we not allowed to use condiments, salt & pepper, etc?
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You're not having anything fired up from the kitchen or having a chef make.  They have a pantry filled with almost everything.  Ask for it, and I'm guessing they have it.  It's crazy like that.  

 
To clarify, you might have a prime rib eventually on the boat, but that takes a while to cook.  So you're probably going to grab a snack before your actual meal is made.  

 
If the ##### captain will allow it, I'll ask for eggs and fry one up real quick. Otherwise, I'm probably asking for a block of cheddar cheese or rainier cherries. 

 
I love how people who haven't eaten snacks in a year, when offered anything in the world they could think of, would be like, "I'm good,  thanks.  I'll just wait 90 minutes for the chef to fire up the kitchen and cook me a meal."

 
How can an island cure meats for me, but this captain can't microwave a can of Spam? You aren't presenting the Dutch in a very good light here. Is this a veiled prejudice rant?

 
Monkian said:
How can an island cure meats for me, but this captain can't microwave a can of Spam? You aren't presenting the Dutch in a very good light here. Is this a veiled prejudice rant?
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As someone of 12.5% Dutch decent, I will be watching for this answer closely.

 
IvanKaramazov said:
You know what, I've had just about with this captain.  I'd like to be returned to my island with all the magic bacon-pigs, please.
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Unfortunately, he's on a tight schedule and can't make any more stops.  Honestly, I was surprised he made the initial stop to rescue you.  Although, he did tell his crew not to expect overtime.

 
Monkian said:
How can an island cure meats for me, but this captain can't microwave a can of Spam? You aren't presenting the Dutch in a very good light here. Is this a veiled prejudice rant?
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The island can't cure meats.  It's not some fantasy island.  It's just that this type of pig automatically cooks and turns into bacon when it dies.  You know, island boars.  And the captain is busy sailing the boat.  He's not cooking anything.  Dude can barely cook toast.  He attended culinary school when he was young and failed out.  It was sad.  They hadn't even really gotten to the tough classes yet.  Guy was having trouble with the basics of cooking.  After that, he decided to go into the Navy.  Sailing was in his blood but he had always wanted to pursue his dream of being a Michelin starred chef in the restaurant he owned.  But alas, that dream had been crushed.  And he would become a ship's captain like his father and his father before him.

Also, you can get a can of Spam.  Just not microwaved.

 
TheIronSheik said:
I love how people who haven't eaten snacks in a year, when offered anything in the world they could think of, would be like, "I'm good,  thanks.  I'll just wait 90 minutes for the chef to fire up the kitchen and cook me a meal."
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If I've learned anything from reading diet... excuse me... nutritional lifestyle threads, it's that if you just eat things like bacon, fish, and coconut oil for a while then you don't crave snack food ever again.

 
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