Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums
Sign in to follow this  
eoMMan

Best home defense weapons that are NOT firearms?

Recommended Posts

Whatcha got?

Anything creative?

Dogs, knives, baseball bats, moat with alligators, etc....what else?

:coffee:

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Land mines.  Careful when you mow, or weed wack

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Wasp Spray <20'

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Answer the door with it tucked like the dude in “Silence of the Lambs” welcome them in for some tea. 

  • Like 1
  • Laughing 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

crossbow

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

paint can tied to a rope

  • Like 8
  • Laughing 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, Ignoratio Elenchi said:

micro machines all over the floor

And Legos.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Serious answer: A dog like our 90 pound German Shepherd. Ours is a sweet boy and might not even do anything to somebody who broke in when we weren't home, but I have zero doubt he would defend us if somebody tried to hurt somebody in the family. But given his bark and the way he looks staring out the window, nobody would.

  • Like 7
  • Love 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Some nice big booming fireworks that my lovely redneck friends made.  May as well be grenades

Signs out front with pictures of MLK.

Sit out front with a couple kegs offering free beer.

Edited by ghostguy123

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dirty diapers

  • Like 1
  • Laughing 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I can weaponize myself by drinking milk.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

saw an ad a few days ago for a super bright flashlight and part of the sales pitch was that a blindingly bright setting could be used for self defense.  thought hmmm....

  • Like 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Fish bat.  Short, has some heft, can do damage in small spaces and easy to store near/under a bed.

  • Like 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, The General said:

Answer the door with it tucked like the dude in “Silence of the Lambs” welcome them in for some tea. 

Address?

 

 

  • Like 1
  • Laughing 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Captain Cranks said:

My uncle, who's a police officer, suggested pepper spray.  

Yeah I've got cougars in my area so for hikes I got some super powerful bear spray. $40 a canister. 

Stuff will knock you on your ### from 35 ft away.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 minutes ago, leftcoastguy7 said:

Yeah I've got cougars in my area so for hikes I got some super powerful bear spray. $40 a canister. 

Stuff will knock you on your ### from 35 ft away.

My ### after a big bowl of vegetarian chili is far more effective and would send looters retreating in fear.

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
10 minutes ago, leftcoastguy7 said:

Yeah I've got cougars in my area so for hikes I got some super powerful bear spray. $40 a canister. 

Stuff will knock you on your ### from 35 ft away.

pics?

  • Like 11
  • Thanks 2
  • Love 1
  • Laughing 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
13 minutes ago, leftcoastguy7 said:

Yeah I've got cougars in my area so for hikes I got some super powerful bear spray. $40 a canister. 

Stuff will knock you on your ### from 35 ft away.

You must be the mac daddy if you need bear spray to fend off the cougars.  

  • Like 3
  • Laughing 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Just now, Ned said:

You must be the mac daddy if you need bear spray to fend off the cougars.  

Where I live --- the OTHER kind of cougar --- trust me, no bueno

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
29 minutes ago, Captain Cranks said:

My uncle, who's a police officer, suggested pepper spray.  

Pepper spray sprinkler system?

 Hmmmmm

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'd learn the Crane kick.

If done right no can defend

  • Like 2
  • Thanks 1
  • Love 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Is it a good idea to blast pepper spray indoors?  I would think you'd get it too along with the intruder.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Dress up as a preacher
Your wife can be a nun
Your 4 adopted kids are all part of make-a-wish foundation
Your dog has 2 legs and is blind

If you steal from this family, you are going straight to hell

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Wasp killer..it sprays 20 feet.

Edited by Da Guru
  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
29 minutes ago, Pipes said:

Is it a good idea to blast pepper spray indoors?  I would think you'd get it too along with the intruder.

I got a can once, and sprayed it out the garage door... had to leave the garage. Definitely a "you get it too" thing. Wasp spray is probably a lot better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

In the United States, more blunt force trauma injuries resulting from domestic assaults are attributed to blows from a fireplace poker than any other weapon.  Just sayin'. Go with what works.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Pipes said:

Is it a good idea to blast pepper spray indoors?  I would think you'd get it too along with the intruder.

From someone who has been pepper sprayed twice, you don't want that #### inside.  

To answer the question "How did you get pepper sprayed twice??", one time was over a buddies house when I was like 20.  Everyone was super drunk and my buddy had a bottle of it and "accidentally" sprayed it in the room. Hit me directly in the face and caused everyone else to choke and cough like crazy in the room.  Everyone had to abandon the house and I had to rinse my eyes with warm water for a long time. Second time, my old man had a flashlight that doubled as a pepper spray dispenser. Probably bought that crap at the local flea market where he would get all his other weird things like this. I was trying to use it to look at his hot water tank that was giving him trouble and pushed the dispense button thinking it was the on off switch.  Not a direct blast, but right next to my head in a pretty confined area.  Once again choking, snotting, coughing.. was horrible. Who creates a flash light that has a button IN THE EXACT SPOT YOU WOULD EXPECT THE ON OFF TO BE THAT ACTUALLY DISPENSES A SPRAY OF DEATH???

Edited by top dog
  • Laughing 5

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

An extremely well trained pit bull and a flame thrower seem to do the trick.

  • Like 1
  • Laughing 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
35 minutes ago, Ron Swanson said:

In the United States, more blunt force trauma injuries resulting from domestic assaults are attributed to blows from a fireplace poker than any other weapon.  Just sayin'. Go with what works.

Nice research.  I'll go with this.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
40 minutes ago, top dog said:

From someone who has been pepper sprayed twice, you don't want that #### inside.  

To answer the question "Who did you get pepper sprayed twice??", one time was over a buddies house when I was like 20.  Everyone was super drunk and my buddy had a bottle of it and "accidentally" sprayed it in the room. Hit me directly in the face and caused everyone else to choke and cough like crazy in the room.  Everyone had to abandon the house and I had to rinse my eyes with warm water for a long time. Second time, my old man had a flashlight that doubled as a pepper spray dispenser. Probably bought that crap at the local flea market where he would get all his other weird things like this. I was trying to use it to look at his hot water tank that was giving him trouble and pushed the dispense button thinking it was the on off switch.  Not a direct blast, but right next to my head in a pretty confined area.  Once again choking, snotting, coughing.. was horrible. Who creates a flash light that has a button IN THE EXACT SPOT YOU WOULD EXPECT THE ON OFF TO BE THAT ACTUALLY DISPENSES A SPRAY OF DEATH???

Keep getting sprayed and build up a tolerance. Intruders won't stand a chance.

  • Laughing 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Pike

Edit:  the polearm not the fish 

Edited by Dan Lambskin

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, ChiefD said:

Shovels. 

I thought about you the other day when I added a nice scoop shovel to my collection to move some landscape rock.

  • Love 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Mel Gibson. You lose his sniper skills without the gun but he’s still very deadly in a fist fight.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I would assume a wood baseball batt with nails driven through it would do some damage. Weakness is it could get stuck on someone or something so you would want a back up weapon like a knife.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
25 minutes ago, Ilov80s said:

An extremely well trained pit bull and a flame thrower seem to do the trick.

pit bulls are not allowed to operate flame throwers in my state. 

  • Like 2
  • Laughing 4

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Ron Swanson said:

Claymore.

Username checks out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.