jamny
Footballguy
So, I left my house the other day and I couldn't believe it, Smoo and The Iron Sheik were playing croquet in my lawn! I yelled out “First of all, how are you, they deleted my Wiki page, but I'm doing okay!" Before I knew it, The Iron Sheik turned around and he was channeling Jim Cantore live on the Weather Channel while chained to a tree, thrashing & kvetching, he appeared to be having a good o'l time when he suddenly froze, his entire torso hit with a rolling heave, and that is when I realized he had entered an eating contest with Shuke and GM. The three of them decided to see who could devour the most Twinkee and Taqi sandwiches, with the only beverage choice being Tequila Sunrises. The Iron Sheik suddenly clutched his stomach while his shorts exploded with delight over the chance, for the very first time in human existence, to actually meet and talk to Antonio Gates, who was walking by and stopped to ask me "who would you start at TE?"
That's when Antonio flashed that world famous grin and said "Show Me Your Rooster"! Shuke immediately notified the authorities, who continued lecturing the offender even while people wearing nothing but MAGA codpieces with their hair on fire repeatedly pooped their pants. And then taking them off and hiding them in the ceiling, where the poop took on a life of it's own.
It got a Chair of Aesthletics position @ Berkeley, bought one of the few houses in the Oakland Hills that wasnt actively ablaze and started lecturing across the country on the subject of "is it pee?" where throngs of people showed up to learn and pay their newfound knowledge forward to embracing others, while still finding time to embrace one's self. This led us down the path to a Walgreens looking for hot pockets and woohoo when the store manager announces "will the person who left a roll of film to be developed an hour ago please pick it up? Our staff is disturbed looking at those pictures of models looking at pictures of themselves." Andy Warhol did it better than we could at Fotomat, which reminds me Rat, remember that girl with the hairy armpits and the face that looked like Olivia Wilde. The dichotomy was endured when she screamed, "run to the sunshine on your face!" and we'd settle in for Popcorn, Evian and replays of the Golden Girls. My mind thankfully drifted off to that wonderful weekend in Fiji when, after too many drinks, we decided to get naked and cliff dive with that group of pygmies, who then introduced us to mescaline and anal beads. That's when we erupted in yet more group pooping. That reminds me of this one time when on an early morning jog I happened to come across Yoga pants.
And they were incredible. So incredible, I lost my mind, and all of my kids at the mall. My wife was mad, but I made it to up to her by spending several hours with her shopping for a new robe but the shopping was instantly cut short because we realized we were an hour late for an appointment with our new sex therapist. We were hoping she could solve our problem of only being sexually aroused by playing a game of monopoly with each other while just wearing tube socks and sunglasses. As we were leaving the office our therapist stopped us and asked if she could join us in our next game of monopoly, as long as she could be the battleship. She said something about liking big guns as she grinned at me. I immediately said "yes, that would be great", while my wife said "F--- You, B----. I am the battle ship. You can be the dog. If you don't like it, you can kiss my grits at the crack of dawn. 'Let's go, Don!' Oh, so everyone is now all confused about
That's when Antonio flashed that world famous grin and said "Show Me Your Rooster"! Shuke immediately notified the authorities, who continued lecturing the offender even while people wearing nothing but MAGA codpieces with their hair on fire repeatedly pooped their pants. And then taking them off and hiding them in the ceiling, where the poop took on a life of it's own.
It got a Chair of Aesthletics position @ Berkeley, bought one of the few houses in the Oakland Hills that wasnt actively ablaze and started lecturing across the country on the subject of "is it pee?" where throngs of people showed up to learn and pay their newfound knowledge forward to embracing others, while still finding time to embrace one's self. This led us down the path to a Walgreens looking for hot pockets and woohoo when the store manager announces "will the person who left a roll of film to be developed an hour ago please pick it up? Our staff is disturbed looking at those pictures of models looking at pictures of themselves." Andy Warhol did it better than we could at Fotomat, which reminds me Rat, remember that girl with the hairy armpits and the face that looked like Olivia Wilde. The dichotomy was endured when she screamed, "run to the sunshine on your face!" and we'd settle in for Popcorn, Evian and replays of the Golden Girls. My mind thankfully drifted off to that wonderful weekend in Fiji when, after too many drinks, we decided to get naked and cliff dive with that group of pygmies, who then introduced us to mescaline and anal beads. That's when we erupted in yet more group pooping. That reminds me of this one time when on an early morning jog I happened to come across Yoga pants.
And they were incredible. So incredible, I lost my mind, and all of my kids at the mall. My wife was mad, but I made it to up to her by spending several hours with her shopping for a new robe but the shopping was instantly cut short because we realized we were an hour late for an appointment with our new sex therapist. We were hoping she could solve our problem of only being sexually aroused by playing a game of monopoly with each other while just wearing tube socks and sunglasses. As we were leaving the office our therapist stopped us and asked if she could join us in our next game of monopoly, as long as she could be the battleship. She said something about liking big guns as she grinned at me. I immediately said "yes, that would be great", while my wife said "F--- You, B----. I am the battle ship. You can be the dog. If you don't like it, you can kiss my grits at the crack of dawn. 'Let's go, Don!' Oh, so everyone is now all confused about
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