What's new
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Welcome to Our Forums. Once you've registered and logged in, you're primed to talk football, among other topics, with the sharpest and most experienced fantasy players on the internet.

Best Animal - Whatcha Got? (1 Viewer)

Man of Constant Sorrow said:
Kentucky Fried Chicken! 

It's a rather too common localized species here, and it's not healthy to eat AT ALL. 

But, damn... it's easy to capture and requires virtually no prep work. 

Alas, I cannot eat you anymore Mr. KFC. 😐

Roam free now my brother... roam free. 
:eek: There he is! 

 
tie: The Markhor and the Snow Leopard

On my old computer i had pretty much every link to footage of either & both of these two species who share the Upper Himalaya and Pamir Mountains of Asia.

This is weird, but i've been wanting to tell this story for over a decade. In the 00s, I developed a pilot of a TV show that was pretty much about PTSD. I have a great number of non-traditional theories about those kinds of mental disorders and, in the post-9-11/Iraq War days, i found a way to explore them in a police procedural format. Wrote a pilot about a midwestern precinct house that is blown up by a drug dealer trying to spring his brother from a holding cell. He had bought an Exocet missile from his cartel connections just for grins and, when his bro got busted, he used it not knowing its destructive power to try to get in, not realizing he'd be the perpetrator of a mini 9-11 for doing so. Fifty people, mostly police employees, were killed in the attack and resulting siege.

Now, of course, the city would have gotten the precinct back up & running as soon as possible to show strength in this gangified community and most of the cops sucked it up and got back to business but their personalities started to leak from post-siege PTSD  and spilled over into their police work.

if you haven't already quit reading, this is the time you ask "wtf does this have to do with Asian hi-altitude animal species?!". If you haven't given up yet, follow me a sec. I may be alone in thinking this, but i believe this to be the best story angle i ever pulled out my ###.

In an inn in Osh, Kyrgystan, Det. Lt. (Ret.) Roy McCoy watches his old precinct burning on CNN. How did he get there, you might ask? Several years before. McCoy had been involved in a shootout with the same gang that had just attacked his precinct and his partner & a female uniform were killed and him severely injured. At the time, he blamed himself (the precinct kinda blamed him too) to such an extent that he got a full disability for PTSD from it. After his physical therapy was completed, McCoy wanted to do something spectacular in the attempt to clear his head of his flashbacks. 

He decided he wanted to climb Everest, so he went to Nepal. When he found out it costs six figs and there are actual traffic jams and incidents of trail rage up there, he decided to use the summer to do some high-altitude hiking on his own (an actual treatment for psych disorders - the way one must breathe in order to maintain in a low-oxygen environment is actually a form of self-hypnosis/mindfulness). He hiked solo until fall, then wintered in Northern India, where trekkers told him about the Pamir Mountains. That range is just above Pakistan, near where the Taliban had been chased by US forces, so McCoy feared that would be a problem. Everybody told him, though, that the Taliban wouldn't enter the Pamirs because of some ancient tribal rivalry, so he decided to give it a try.

Got there, loved it, hiked&hiked&hiked. One day he saw a band of kids playing a very dangerous game. They were running down a pretty severe cliff face barefoot at top speed, it looking to McCoy as though they were trying to kill themselves. The kids invited McCoy to their settlement. The Hemli people were the reason the Taliban didn't go in the Pamir, because the Hemli people raised themselves with no sense of fear. Every time the Taliban had tried to overwhelm them as they had everyone else in the region, the Hemli would counter with quick, severe guerilla attacks til they gave the Mullahs a big case of "why bother?".

The Hemli raised their children to transcend their fear instincts because their tribal rite of passage was to chase BOTH the Markhor and the Snow Leopard down the Pamir cliffs as in the above clip. McCoy asked him if they could help him defeat his fears and....

So, when he saw his old precinct house burning on TV, he knew that he was the one who could help his old compatriots with the post-siege challenges to come. Went back to America, had a helluva time getting reinstated but, once he did he was able to recognize PTSD and use working cases with the afflicted to help them thru some of their problems with it. In the Season 1 outline, McCoy's story was a verrrrry slow rollout, but shows like Sopranos & Mad Men & Breaking Bad were pretty newly going that way and it was such a ton o' fun to work on. If any of you watched the old Fugitive series of the 60s, it rolls that way with that "briefly touching other people's lives while dealing with the madness of your own" kinda thing.

Unfortunately, after all that work i found out that my old, limited TV connections (i'd written a comedy pilot that got a "go" from ABC in the early 80s) were worthless and that the business had changed to not buying new script ideas unless you were already working on a show. It's been over a decade, never gonna sell, so i thought i'd roll out my story with the above clip. Sorry.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
tie: The Markhor and the Snow Leopard

On my old computer i had pretty much every link to footage of either & both of these two species who share the Upper Himalaya and Pamir Mountains of Asia.

This is weird, but i've been wanting to tell this story for over a decade. In the 00s, I developed a pilot of a TV show that was pretty much about PTSD. I have a great number of non-traditional theories about those kinds of mental disorders and, in the post-9-11/Iraq War days, i found a way to explore them in a police procedural format. Wrote a pilot about a midwestern precinct house that is blown up by a drug dealer trying to spring his brother from a holding cell. He had bought an Exocet missile from his cartel connections just for grins and, when his bro got busted, he used it not knowing its destructive power to try to get in, not realizing he'd be the perpetrator of a mini 9-11 for doing so. Fifty people, mostly police employees, were killed in the attack and resulting siege.

Now, of course, the city would have gotten the precinct back up & running as soon as possible to show strength in this gangified community and most of the cops sucked it up and got back to business but their personalities started to leak from post-siege PTSD  and spilled over into their police work.

if you haven't already quit reading, this is the time you ask "wtf does this have to do with Asian hi-altitude animal species?!". If you haven't given up yet, follow me a sec. I may be alone in thinking this, but i believe this to be the best story angle i ever pulled out my ###.

In an inn in Osh, Kyrgystan, Det. Lt. (Ret.) Roy McCoy watches his old precinct burning on CNN. How did he get there, you might ask? Several years before. McCoy had been involved in a shootout with the same gang that had just attacked his precinct and his partner & a female uniform were killed and him severely injured. At the time, he blamed himself (the precinct kinda blamed him too) to such an extent that he got a full disability for PTSD from it. After his physical therapy was completed, McCoy wanted to do something spectacular in the attempt to clear his head of his flashbacks. 

He decided he wanted to climb Everest, so he went to Nepal. When he found out it costs six figs and there are actual traffic jams and incidents of trail rage up there, he decided to use the summer to do some high-altitude hiking on his own (an actual treatment for psych disorders - the way one must breathe in order to maintain is actually a form of self-hypnosis). He hiked solo until fall, then wintered in Northern India, where trekkers told him about the Pamir Mountains. That range is just above Pakistan, near where the Taliban had been chased by US forces, so McCoy feared that would be a problem. Everybody told him, though, that the Taliban wouldn't enter the Pamirs because of some ancient tribal rivalry, so he decided to give it a try.

Got there, loved it, hiked&hiked&hiked. One day he saw a band of kids playing a very dangerous game. They were running down a pretty severe cliff face barefoot at top speed, it looking to McCoy as though they were trying to kill themselves. The kids invited McCoy to their settlement. The Hemli people were the reason the Taliban didn't go in the Pamir, because the Hemli people raised themselves with no sense of fear. Every time the Taliban had tried to overwhelm them as they had everyone else in the region, the Hemli would counter with quick, severe guerilla attacks til they gave the Mullahs a big case of "why bother?".

The Hemli raised their children to transcend their fear instincts because their tribal rite of passage was to chase BOTH the Markhor and the Snow Leopard down the Pamir cliffs as in the above clip. McCoy asked him if they could help him defeat his fears and....

So, when he saw his old precinct house burning on TV, he knew that he was the one who could help his old compatriots with the post-siege challenges to come. Went back to America, had a helluva time getting reinstated but, once he did he was able to recognize PTSD and use working cases with the afflicted to help them thru some of their problems with it. In the Season 1 outline, McCoy's story was a verrrrry slow rollout, but shows like Sopranos & Mad Men & Breaking Bad were pretty newly going that way and it was such a ton o' fun to work on. If any of you watched the old Fugitive series of the 60s, it rolls that way with that "briefly touching other people's lives while dealing with the madness of your own" kinda thing.

Unfortunately, after all that work i found out that my old, limited TV connections (i'd written a comedy pilot that got a "go" from ABC in the early 80s) were worthless and that the business had changed to not buying new script ideas unless you were already working on a show. It's been over a decade, never gonna sell, so i thought i'd roll out my story with the above clip. Sorry.
Honesty... 

... I was betting on The Possums of Comedy... 

... but, I like this answer too. 

 
I like the love the Liger is getting because it's super cool, but it's also a little sad as they are pretty unsustainable -- they have super short lifespans and have the tendency to be sterile. Kinda taps the brakes on the whole concept for me.

I throw my support behind the dog as the best animal, but also wanted to show the blobfish a little love. 

The blobfish primarily hunts by just floating along and letting creatures wander into its mouth, rather than expending any energy.
My spirit animal, it appears.

 

Users who are viewing this thread

Top