Does your wife (or SO) fart in front of you? (1 Viewer)

[xulf]

Well?

 

[Keerock]

Never once... and I've obviously seen her in every possible scenario after 30+ years.  Even giving birth... She may be alien.

 

[xulf]

poles broken if you vote no

I don't make polls often, no idea what to do.

 

[Ignoramus]

Neat pole.

No, my wife is not a disgusting savage.

I, on the other hand...

 

[jamny]

poles broken if you vote no

 

[xulf]

OK, added an option on Q2.

 

[Ignoramus]

I don't make polls often, no idea what to do.

Just make it into one question.

How often does your wife fart in front of you?

Monthly

Weekly

Daily

Multiple times per day

Never

 

[Zegras11]

Some people should not start threads 

 

[Ignoramus]

What do I choose if she farts (everyone does) but not in front of me?

 

[Ignoramus]

Multiple times per day?  :X

How's the sex life?

Aromatic

 

[Zegras11]

Never once... and I've obviously seen her in every possible scenario after 30+ years.  Even giving birth... She may be alien.

35 years in a few weeks.   Not once.   

 

[xulf]

What do I choose if she farts (everyone does) but not in front of me?

How would you know...

 

[xulf]

Is it in front of you if you hear it through a thin hotel bathroom door, or something?

Sure - anything audible is fair game.

 

[xulf]

But that's not intentionally in front of you. Your pole questions are flawed. 

Never said intentional.  If one slips on accident, that still counts.  My pole, my rules.

 

[El Floppo]

Well?

audibly? no. olfactorily? daily. nightly. all the timely. 

but she still has the gumption to complain about my nightly loud rips while watching tv. I guess it's bad to make noise- but melting metal is fine.

 

[xulf]

So we're not talking about physically in front of you. It could be an audible boom through bathroom walls when they think you're out grabbing coffee?

Holy smokes.  You are over thinking this.  Do you hear your lady toot or not?

Hell, I will let loud bombs go 3 rooms away and she can hear it.  That would count.

Also, just knowing they did (silent ones) still counts.

 

[ZenoRazon]

What do we really do with this info?

 

[MAC_32]

Voted once a day, but I don't pay attention so it's just a wild guess - it's probably less than that. I know she absorbs a lot more than she doles out though. 

 

[xulf]

What do we really do with this info?

I have big plans.

 

[E Street Brat]

I've actually seen my wife poop her pants...... Twice!

 

[Da Guru]

Never once... and I've obviously seen her in every possible scenario after 30+ years.  Even giving birth... She may be alien.

I think I have heard my wife fart 2-3 times..only when sneezing of coughing.

 

[El Floppo]

What do we really do with this info?

PIPE DOWN NEWB

Spoiler

 

 

[ZenoRazon]

I have big plans.

Big plans with fart info?   Hmmmm?

 

[El Floppo]

I've actually seen my wife poop her pants...... Twice!

I've watched mine get a c-section twice... trade ya.

 

[Zegras11]

I've actually seen my wife poop her pants...... Twice!

Any ceiling action?

 

[ZenoRazon]

PIPE DOWN NEWB

Spoiler

 

Shut up half pint.

 

[ZenoRazon]

Who n the hell cares about ....farts?  Are you kidding me?

I thought this place was all worried about quality threads?   Farts??????????

Wow~~~~~~~~

 

[xulf]

Who n the hell cares about ....farts?  Are you kidding me?

I thought this place was all worried about quality threads?   Farts??????????

Wow~~~~~~~~

This is serious business/research.  Move along.

 

[Henry Ford]

This is serious business, guy. Your question states "In front of you." 

Paging @Henry Ford to lawyer speak this question. If this were a deposition, based on my understanding of your question, id say NO.

I recommend that before you make any decisions about your deposition testimony you watch this short deposition instructional video that I like to show to my clients.

 

[H Jass]

In front of me?!?  How about on me. 

/dentist

 

[Bull Dozier]

I've actually seen my wife poop her pants...... Twice!

Sounds threadworthy.

 

[Ignoramus]

This is serious business, guy. Your question states "In front of you." 

Paging @Henry Ford to lawyer speak this question. If this were a deposition, based on my understanding of your question, id say NO.

No way, me farting silently in the office bathroom clearly counts as farting "in front of my wife."

 

[Mr. Mojo]

It's all out war at my house.

 

[the moops]

Never once... and I've obviously seen her in every possible scenario after 30+ years.  Even giving birth... She may be alien.

35 years in a few weeks.   Not once.   

How is this even possible? WTF is wrong with your ladies?

 

[Ignoramus]

Mods, please remove my vote from this stupid pole. TIA

 

[ZenoRazon]

This is serious business/research.  Move along.

Then break down exactly what you plan to do with this?

For a place all worried about thread quality........farts???

 

[Gianni Verscotchie]

Farting is not tolerated

 

[Henry Ford]

Then break down exactly what you plan to do with this?

For a place all worried about thread quality........farts???

I don't really have a dog in this fight, but I think the key difference here is probably that you've started more threads in the last 24 hours, than xulf has started since Trump took office.

 

[ZenoRazon]

I don't really have a dog in this fight, but I think the key difference here is probably that you've started more threads in the last 24 hours, than xulf has started since Trump took office.

Show me a thread I have started in the last 24 hours?  Love to see it.

What is the deal here with starting threads anyway, isn't that what we do here?

 

[EYLive]

Multiple times per day... and with gusto. 

 

[AAABatteries]

Of course.  It’s laughable that people think their SO of many years hasn’t.  You may not have heard it but they have.  It’s a natural bodily function that everybody does.  I get being demure but it’s also a little weird that they care enough to mask it.  No need to celebrate it but no reason to hide it either.

 

[-OZ-]

But that's not intentionally in front of you. Your pole questions are flawed. 

Thankfully the wife doesn't intentionally fart. Butt it happens. 

 

[Henry Ford]

Show me a thread I have started in the last 24 hours?  Love to see it.

What is the deal here with starting threads anyway, isn't that what we do here?

Again, I don't have an issue with it, and I was referring to the time period when people were upset with your thread starting (the 24 hours around Saturday and Sunday was probably the time people angered you about your thread starting) but here's a thread you started in the last 24 hours.

 

[Wrigley]

All the time

and as the father of 3 girls, they toot like freight trains too 

 

[ZenoRazon]

Again, I don't have an issue with it, and I was referring to the time period when people were upset with your thread starting (the 24 hours around Saturday and Sunday was probably the time people angered you about your thread starting) but here's a thread you started in the last 24 hours.

So...one...thread?  What happened to so many threads the last 24 hours?

Here we have two threads about farting, there goes worrying about quality threads.

 

[cosjobs]

Is it in front of you if you hear it through a thin hotel bathroom door, or something?

that wasn't a fart

 

[Henry Ford]

So...one...thread?  What happened to so many threads the last 24 hours?

Here we have two threads about farting, there goes worrying about quality threads.

I'm beginning to think you're not reading what I type.  That makes it rather a waste of time to do so.  

 

[Henry Ford]

that wasn't a fart

What if you're looking under the door at the time?

 

[apalmer]

Never once... and I've obviously seen her in every possible scenario after 30+ years.  Even giving birth... She may be alien.

First few years, no. After 30, she manages to look embarrassed when she does it.

 

[ZenoRazon]

I'm beginning to think you're not reading what I type.  That makes it rather a waste of time to do so.  

Yes I am, you said I posted more threads in the last 24hours than that guy did in months.  Which wasn't true..