General Sports Development Question (1 Viewer)

[Anarchy99]

I was discussing with someone yesterday the evolution (?) of youth sports compared to "back in the day." I grew up in the late 70s and early 80s, and there were noticeable differences in how sports were handled then vs. now. For starters, where I lived, you couldn't even play an organized sport until you were 8 years old. On top of that, every sport was pretty much seasonal only. You played baseball for 3 months or basketball for 4 months and then moved to another sport when that sport season ended. I ended up playing on our town's first travel / tournament baseball team and our first club / travel soccer program, both of which met with more dirty looks than anything else because we were playing "out of season." Whatever sport you played, you practiced once or twice a week and had a game or two each week, but the schedule was not hectic from what I remember.

Flash forward until today. It seems like any competitive sport is now played 12 months out of the year. There is a soccer season in the fall AND spring, along with indoor soccer and futsal in the winter months. And there are a million and one organizations and teams. In our town, there are soccer programs for 3 year olds. Football wise, the kids start playing now at 5 years old.

Basketball has year round AAU, travel teams, camps, clinic, never ending skills and drills, etc. Our son played baseball and there were leagues, AAU, American Legion, etc. to the point where they played even if it was snowing. And a week after the season "ended" in winter, they were already starting indoor practices and wanted pitchers and catchers to report ASAP.

Don't even get me started with hockey, as my nephews played and would have to practice at 4 or 5 in the morning, ended up playing on inline teams because they could never get ice time to play or practice, and generally had a nightmare schedule.

The saddest part being that if you don't enroll your kids in a lot of this stuff, it gets held against them and they won't make the next level team or school team.

So my big question is, with kids starting younger and younger and playing the same sport almost 365 days a year (and by extension having parents shell out thousands of dollars), has the quality of play gone up any vs. generations past? I ask because I just don't see an improvement. In some instances, my eyes tell me the quality of coaching and play has usually gotten worse. Do others feel the same way, or am I in the minority?

 

[Mr. Know-It-All]

Specialization has gone up and overuse injuries have gone up - but quality of athlete has gone up as well just due to advances in training and technology. But I agree with your point that coaching has gone down. Back in the early 80s there were 3-4 travel baseball teams. The best of the best kids made those teams and everyone else played rec ball....and it was not a bad thing. Coaches were pretty decent in rec. Now, the number of "select" teams has increased exponentially and has gone from ability to play at a higher level to ability to pay at a higher level. Not saying there are not storng travel teams out there that are worth every penny, but anymore if your kid doesn't make a top team - you start up your own team to get junior exposure.

Funny thing is, everyone wants to have their kid specialize to make the next level.. Talk to the coaches at the next level - they want well rounded athletes. So there seems to be a disconnect between what coaches want and what parents of athletes think coaches want.

 

[fatguyinalittlecoat]

Quality of play in competitive youth soccer has gone way up since I was a kid. Not even close.

 

[Cjw_55106]

Two things drive the "all year" sports phenomena. First, like everything else, money. Second, everyone thinks their kid is the next Michael Jordan, Bryce Harper, etc.

The quality of play has gone up. For as much as we long for the days of when we were kids with pick up games and such, my high school son is a much better athlete than I was at his age...and I was pretty decent compared to the other kids. Hyper bowl of course and many things can play into this. I don't think the coaching quality has gone down at all. It is probably watered down with the 20 options kids have for a single sport, so your kid's coach might be a volunteer that is doing it because no one else would. The top coaches are still great and probably are more knowledgeable than 30 years ago.

 

[fatguyinalittlecoat]

Quality of play in competitive youth soccer has gone way up since I was a kid. Not even close.

I should add, though, that the quality of play in rec league soccer may very well have declined since I was a kid. When I played rec league, we had some decent players who probably would be doing travel teams now.

 

[Bull Dozier]

Two things drive the "all year" sports phenomena. First, like everything else, money. Second, everyone thinks their kid is the next Michael Jordan, Bryce Harper, etc.

The quality of play has gone up. For as much as we long for the days of when we were kids with pick up games and such, my high school son is a much better athlete than I was at his age...and I was pretty decent compared to the other kids. Hyper bowl of course and many things can play into this. I don't think the coaching quality has gone down at all. It is probably watered down with the 20 options kids have for a single sport, so your kid's coach might be a volunteer that is doing it because no one else would. The top coaches are still great and probably are more knowledgeable than 30 years ago.

This is the biggest factor to me. When I was a kid, if you tried out for traveling ball, if you weren't good enough, you got cut and went to play rec ball. Now, most sports seem to be willing to make as many teams as they can get kids and coaches for. It seems to me to be all about the money. These travel teams cost a lot of money. While the local programs and most likely non profit, people are making money off of this so it gets pushed.

Heck, I know a lot of kids that refuse to play rec ball if they don't make the travel team. That just doesn't make sense to me. You're not that good, go have fun playing non-super competitive ball with other kids who are there to enjoy the game.

 

[Mookie]

Level of play, coaching, cost, commitment has all dramatically increased, but I too long for the days when kids could go through seasons and not be pressured into specialization. Someone also made a great point about repetition injuries, which are becoming a huge problem. If I had to have kids again, I would also make sure they were born earlier in the calendar year so they would have an age advantage in their age group. Yup, it's getting that bad.

 

[belljr]

So far we are lucky. This is for softball

I was against travel but as others have mentioned our rec leagues talent has decreased because the talent left for travel

We jumped because I didn't want my kid to "fall behind" Also I noticed the coaching even in travel seems bad.

I won't pretend to be the greatest coach in the world but I know my #### and it amazes me how little other coaches don't know.

3 coaches had no idea about the ####### infield fly rule. I also had to breakup and arguemtn with coaches FROM THE OTHER team and an umpire because they didn't know what a fair ball was.

I also see umpiring not as good as it once was, which is surprising.

Anyway, that being said our travel coach has been great, i'm the assistant and he has a "in season" policy.

You play a fall sport - that is you #1 priority. Winter same thing.

Once March hits Softball.

I'm sure that may change when we hit the 14U level but who knows. The last 2 years have been positive. We are also not a "club" level team so it's not crazy money and parents.

I agree with what much that has been posted and think I can argue/support both sides now

 

[Anarchy99]

The other thing I may not have accounted for is that back in the day, the kids that played even rec sports were the ones that athletes and really wanted to play. Now it seems that for some sports there are 3 times as many kids playing. So in my day, the better kids or more athletic kids were the ones really committed to sports. Now there are so many groups, teams, and organizations that the competitive talent pool is spread pretty thin.

For example, our somewhat small to mid sized town (30,000 people) ended up having 2 or 3 travel basketball teams per grade because so many kids wanted to play on them. I promise you that there are not 30-40 kids PER GRADE that are anywhere near skilled enough to be playing travel basketball. Add in the multitude of options including AAU teams, school teams, church teams, etc. and a lot of kids end up getting mixed in with kids that probably shouldn't be where they are and you end up with a hodge podge of good kids, so so kids, and kids that really should find another sport.

But like others have said, most parents think their kid is the next Steph Curry (I was going to say Michael Jordan but that was so long ago) and what organization will turn down a hefty sized check and turn kids away?

 

[Mr. Know-It-All]

So far we are lucky. This is for softball

I was against travel but as others have mentioned our rec leagues talent has decreased because the talent left for trouble.

We jumped because I didn't want my kid to "fall behind" Also I noticed the coaching even in travel seems bad.

I won't pretend to be the greatest coach in the world but I know my #### and it amazes me how little other coaches don't know.

3 coaches had no idea about the ####### infield fly rule. I also had to breakup and arguemtn with coaches FROM THE OTHER team and an umpire because they didn't know what a fair ball was.

I also see umpiring not as good as it once was, which is surprising.

Anyway, that being said our travel coach has been great, i'm the assistant and he has a "in season" policy.

You play a fall sport - that is you #1 priority. Winter same thing.

Once March hits Softball.

I'm sure that may change when we hit the 14U level but who knows. The last 2 years have been positive. We are also not a "club" level team so it's not crazy money and parents.

I agree with what much that has been posted and think I can argue/support both sides now

My now HS Sophomore was in an "in season" arrangement when he played travel baseball which was nice - and also nice is that at our HS that coach also encourages multi-sport athletes...but we are a mid-sized school. I hear at large schools the coaches are very much into specialization (at least in our area). My niece, who now plays collegiate basketball was a stud in Basketball, Volleyball and Softball - but as soon as she hit Sophomore year in HS, her volleyball coach told her she could not play basketball and softball. They wanted her to do club in summer, train year round and play HS volleyball in season. So, she quit volleyball - enjoyed her So-Sr years in basketball and softball and then was fortunate enough to get a bball scholarship. Let kids enjoy HS athletics, time is fleeting and they will never have that chance again. Screw the specialist coaches.

 

[Cjw_55106]

I know they exist, so maybe we have been lucky. We have yet to run into a coach or organization that thinks kids should play just one sport.

 

[Todem]

Travel Baseball is a big business down here in South Florida (hell the entire state). You have 70% of the teams that are simply just rec level players wearing fancy uniforms and hiring coaches who do this year round 7 days a week.

My son is turning 11 and on what is considered a "Majors" level team. And in that division his team is a .500-.600 team. We have won some decent tournaments (placed 7th out of 30th in the AAU Grand Nationals at Disney last summer) but for the most part all the parents on our team have a few key goals.

1) For our son's to develop and play the very best competition they can at their age level giving 100% effort all the time.

2) To develop into respectful young men who win and lose with class.

3) To travel out of the county lines and culminate the teams grand finale at The Cooperstown Field Of Dreams Tournament in Summer 2017.

After that this team will likely shut down. My son will be in middle school and we will see where he is at and if he wants to keep playing (I have a hunch he will as he loves the game). If so we will hopefully find a high level local travel team for him in the fall. And he can play on his middle school team in the spring.

It's not about win's and losses for our team. It's about the personal development of the boys. These are 11 year old kids. Half of them will not even be playing baseball by high school. It's a fact. I just want my son to love the game, have fun and keep growing. We are diligent in only pitching our boys 2 innings max or 40-50 total pitches. If a kid hits the 50 pitch count he will not pitch again for at least 6 days (the only exception is in a big tournament and he has at least 2 days to rest, that is the only exception but we rarely need them again as 9 kids do pitch). We insist at this age level every kid should be able to play 2 positions (INF and OF) with high competence and be able to come in for at least an inning and throw some strikes to help their team. So we will lose games because we truly believe in every kid's development on this team. We are not going to pitch a kid for 4-5 innings even if he is cruising. We have 12 boys. Some kids do sit more than one inning but they are very happy to be on the team and have top notch coaching. All the families are united. That is tough to have, but for long term success it is a must. Every parent signs the golden expectations document that we expect of them and their son before joining the team. If they can't abide by it for a season.....they need to find a new team. A few of the golden expectations are quite simple:

1) Absolutely no coaching from the stands

2) Never ever talk or be negative in the stands about any member of the team or any family member

3) 24 hour rule in talking with our head coach about only your son following a game. If you ever talk about another kid the discussion ends right there on the spot. But you must wait 24 hours before calling the coach to talk.

4) Absolutely no going over to your son in the dugout, talking to them, giving them water etc. They take their own bags in and out. And they should all have water in a cooler they bring with them.

5) In the stands we only cheer. We do not argue with umpires, get into any funny business with the opposing teams parents, nothing.

6) In the stands we don't even talk to our kids. No "bases loaded Johnny this is your time" We need a hit Johnny" none of that. Watch your kid, there is enough pressure they put on themselves and the coaches put on them that they don't need to hear Mommy and Daddy putting anymore on them. When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

It's amazing how relaxed our boys are when they play. But of course we always have one or two parents who eff up these rules set in place from time to time. But if it get's excessive you will blow it for your kid and have to explain to them why they have been released from the team. It took 2 seasons to get the "right kids and families" who "get it" on board with this team and vision.

My hope is my son keeps his passion and love for this amazing game and takes it as far as "he" wants to. We do play in the fall as well as spring but I make sure my son takes 7 weeks off in the fall (Late November thru the first two weeks of January) and then 8 weeks in the summer. Once we play our last summer tournament in June the only thing my kid does (and it is his choice) is go to the cages once a week to hit and if he wants I will take him out for ground balls and fly balls once a week. No pitching during his two breaks what so ever nor throwing. He plays tennis, pick up basketball, touch football and soccer in his off time.

However I know many parents who push their kids to the brink and then see numerous injuries and it is mind boggling. I never saw arm and legs injuries like I see today in youth sports.

When I was growing up playing ball (1978-1988) (I started playing baseball at age 5) I played January through June and there was no travel. The only travel was all-stars and select in the month of June. In high school I did play in the fall and spring but seasons were short. 3 months each. I had 6 months off from baseball.

The reason we play in the fall now is because we will fall far behind the other majors teams if we don't. Every team plays in the fall in our division. But in the fall we only play 12 games and one tournament a month (Sep-Nov) so about 24 games. We practice a lot more than play in the fall. In the spring we play 20 games and 5 tournaments so about 40 games. The great thing about the way we run our team is the pitching management. And with that comes the fact we will concede many games because we insist on all our boys (9 of the 12 pitch) to pitch, develop, and have fun. At the 9-14 age group I am a big believer that all kids should have the chance to pitch and experience that. It's fun being on the bump. And only a select few who continue on to high school and beyond will ever be real pitchers. So let them have fun while they are young and these games mean absolutely nothing.

There is a wonderful book written by Mike Matheny called The Matheny Manifesto. It is an awesome book on the problems with youth sports today and how he ran his 10-12U travel teams (before he became manager of the Cardinals). We pretty much follow his model. Oh I forgot to mention we also allow our catchers (we have 4 kids who rotate at catcher game to game) to call games now as well (11U). The boys are having so much fun with it and learning a ton.

There are great travel teams out there and I am a big believer in Travel baseball. But not every team is doing things right and many are doing it all wrong and for the wrong reasons.

Now I would have loved for my son to play rec/little league/pony like I did. But the big problem down here is every kid with good to great talent does not play rec. I was blown away. When my son hit 8 years old I thought he was going to kill some kids throwing them the ball. I had to get him out of rec so he could play with kids that could catch a baseball. Seriously....it was that bad. I went though two teams that were just all wrong for us as a family and my son as a player until we found the team we have been on since he turned 10 (I am the assistant/OF/1B Coach and team administrator). We have a hired paid professional coach now who used to run our practices. We hired him on to coach games and tournaments for us going forward. He is a former college pitcher and infielder as well. A tremendous coach, a real hard ### but in a very good way. All the kids respect him and he runs a very scripted tight practice. He is doing high level signals with them, and really focusing on important fundamentals, bunt coverage, proper hit and runs, run downs and pick off's, bunting, proper base running and stealing techniques etc. Great stuff.

So there is good going on in travel youth sports. But unfortunately it is saturated with a lot of mediocre and bad things going on. It has become not only a big business, but a twisted status symbol for parents. So freaking warped. My goodness.

 

[Cjw_55106]

I don't have an issue with not coaching from the stands, but this is just stupid:

When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

 

[belljr]

@Todem, that's why i switched. I thought my daughter was going to kill someone throwing to them.

 

[Todem]

I don't have an issue with not coaching from the stands, but this is just stupid:

When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

No it's not.

You don't need to get crazy at this age. They are not seasoned pitchers. There is a ton of pressure on them...more than enough noise coming from the opposing dugout, their own teammates are encouraging them enough/ the head coach throwing in some advice. They don't need to hear their parents from the stands before every pitch.

That is nonsense and not helping them. Trust me. The difference I saw in many kids developing as pitchers without that added parent noise factor is stark.

If that is your opinion so be it. If you don't believe 100% in the coaching and the expectations of the team it is not the right team for you and your son. Simple as that.

I am glad we allow our kids to pitch without parent noise before every pitch. Cheer all you want after the strike call. But while they are on the mound, focusing on the signs, managing base runners and zoning in....leave them the **ck alone.

When they hit 15-16....yeah whatever. They are young adults in the making and it is not nearly that big of a deal. But the maturity level and mental toughness of a 10/11 year old developing pitcher is vastly different then a teenage kid. And the amount of pressure at that age is even more intense as they want to please you so badly.

 

[Captain Fantastic]

Well spoken, Todem. I wish all parents kept that attitude.

From a macro perspective, I have a huge problem with today's parenting generation not allowing kids "free time". We seem so intent on filling every minute or every day to ensure our kids "keep up" and are developing to the highest possible levels.

Whatevs.

Some of my fondest memories of childhood were the SLOW days. The times we hung around the house and wandered the neighborhood and played in the backyard.

Today's kids (not all, but a big percentage) are being given a soccer ball or a bat and mitt or a basketball and being told, "this is important. You need to focus on this."

Simple truth - less than 1% of all kids will grow up to be professional athletes. That means the other 99% - if they're interested in sports as children - should be playing to LEARN and HAVE FUN.

Is it possible to do those things while playing 365 days a year? Sure, but I see way too many miserable kids (and, ironically, miserable parents who insist on keeping on keeping on) who do it because they "have to".

Says who?

I wish things were like the old days (begin rant here) but now, good luck if you want your kid to play one sport per season and only commit a couple evenings per week to a sport. Those days are gone.

 

[Todem]

Well spoken, Todem. I wish all parents kept that attitude.

From a macro perspective, I have a huge problem with today's parenting generation not allowing kids "free time". We seem so intent on filling every minute or every day to ensure our kids "keep up" and are developing to the highest possible levels.

Whatevs.

Some of my fondest memories of childhood were the SLOW days. The times we hung around the house and wandered the neighborhood and played in the backyard.

Today's kids (not all, but a big percentage) are being given a soccer ball or a bat and mitt or a basketball and being told, "this is important. You need to focus on this."

Simple truth - less than 1% of all kids will grow up to be professional athletes. That means the other 99% - if they're interested in sports as children - should be playing to LEARN and HAVE FUN.

Is it possible to do those things while playing 365 days a year? Sure, but I see way too many miserable kids (and, ironically, miserable parents who insist on keeping on keeping on) who do it because they "have to".

Says who?

I wish things were like the old days (begin rant here) but now, good luck if you want your kid to play one sport per season and only commit a couple evenings per week to a sport. Those days are gone.

Yeah. I hear you.

My kid goes over his buddies house everyday after school for 45 minutes to let off steam and play football, basketball, ping pong...whatever the flavor of the day is.

 

[belljr]

Todem - no idea he put out a book

I remember reading the manifesto way back

 

[Bull Dozier]

Specialization is a horrible trend. Every word I've heard from college coaches is they want to recruit well rounded atheletes, they don't want kids that have specialized for three plus years.

I know of two kids my daughters age (now a college freshman) that specialized and it worked against them. One was a basketball, football and baseball player. He thought his best chances were at a baseball scholarship, so he dropped the other two and worked at baseball for a couple of years. Never got a sniff at anything, so he wised up and played basketball against his senior year. Went to college and played nothing because he was burnt out on the process, but realized he missed the locker room so he walked on to a D-III baseball team.

The other thought basketball was his ticket, so he stopped playing baseball in high school. Wound up with only D-III interst in basketball so he went ahead and got back into baseball as a senior. Had such a good season, he got an offer from a D-II school.

You just never know how things are going to turn out, and most kids don't know really what their passions are going to be when they are 14 years old.

 

[Todem]

Specialization is a horrible trend. Every word I've heard from college coaches is they want to recruit well rounded atheletes, they don't want kids that have specialized for three plus years.

I know of two kids my daughters age (now a college freshman) that specialized and it worked against them. One was a basketball, football and baseball player. He thought his best chances were at a baseball scholarship, so he dropped the other two and worked at baseball for a couple of years. Never got a sniff at anything, so he wised up and played basketball against his senior year. Went to college and played nothing because he was burnt out on the process, but realized he missed the locker room so he walked on to a D-III baseball team.

The other thought basketball was his ticket, so he stopped playing baseball in high school. Wound up with only D-III interst in basketball so he went ahead and got back into baseball as a senior. Had such a good season, he got an offer from a D-II school.

You just never know how things are going to turn out, and most kids don't know really what their passions are going to be when they are 14 years old.

Bingo.

If my kid is done at 14...then he is done. My hope is he plays sports period throughout his life. But right now his passion is baseball. And I don't over kill him. He loves to play, practice etc. It's up to him to take it as far as he wants. If he tells me he just does not want to play anymore....well then that's that. By the end of his 8 week break he is chomping at the bit to play. I know other kids though that simply don't stop. Those are the ones likely to quit by 14.

 

[BobbyLayne]

My boss has 3 boys (10th grade, 8th and 1st.) The oldest two are on lax travel teams but not really elite. My boss captained a D1 program back in the 80s and as a coach he's tapped into the whole east coast lax network. I feel bad for the oldest boy - he likes (does not love) lacrosse, and feels like he's a failure because he hasn't excelled. Most elite sophomores have a scholarship waiting for them next year. So the kid took up fencing, and he's dominating at the h.s. level. There's another fencer at his school who spends every day getting one on one training from a former Olympian. That kid doesn't even go to his high school matches, but showed up out of the blue for the big conference tournament. He smoked everyone, didn't give up a single point, left before the meet was over and forgot to pick up his first place medal.

My kid wants to be in Curling club next year when he goes off to college. I'm kind of glad he never got caught up in competitive team sports (I played baseball & football.) He played tennis for awhile but he just isn't mentally built that way, and I never pushed him.

 

[Sabertooth]

My kids quit sports early. I thank my lucky stars for this.

 

[Cjw_55106]

I don't have an issue with not coaching from the stands, but this is just stupid:

When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

No it's not. You don't need to get crazy at this age. They are not seasoned pitchers. There is a ton of pressure on them...more than enough noise coming from the opposing dugout, their own teammates are encouraging them enough/ the head coach throwing in some advice. They don't need to hear their parents from the stands before every pitch.

That is nonsense and not helping them. Trust me. The difference I saw in many kids developing as pitchers without that added parent noise factor is stark.

If that is your opinion so be it. If you don't believe 100% in the coaching and the expectations of the team it is not the right team for you and your son. Simple as that.

I am glad we allow our kids to pitch without parent noise before every pitch. Cheer all you want after the strike call. But while they are on the mound, focusing on the signs, managing base runners and zoning in....leave them the **ck alone.

When they hit 15-16....yeah whatever. They are young adults in the making and it is not nearly that big of a deal. But the maturity level and mental toughness of a 10/11 year old developing pitcher is vastly different then a teenage kid. And the amount of pressure at that age is even more intense as they want to please you so badly.

So now cheering for your child is "getting crazy"? I'd love to see someone tell a parent that they aren't following the "gold standard" because they encouraged their child while they were on the mound.

 

[Todem]

I don't have an issue with not coaching from the stands, but this is just stupid:

When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

No it's not. You don't need to get crazy at this age. They are not seasoned pitchers. There is a ton of pressure on them...more than enough noise coming from the opposing dugout, their own teammates are encouraging them enough/ the head coach throwing in some advice. They don't need to hear their parents from the stands before every pitch.

That is nonsense and not helping them. Trust me. The difference I saw in many kids developing as pitchers without that added parent noise factor is stark.

If that is your opinion so be it. If you don't believe 100% in the coaching and the expectations of the team it is not the right team for you and your son. Simple as that.

I am glad we allow our kids to pitch without parent noise before every pitch. Cheer all you want after the strike call. But while they are on the mound, focusing on the signs, managing base runners and zoning in....leave them the **ck alone.

When they hit 15-16....yeah whatever. They are young adults in the making and it is not nearly that big of a deal. But the maturity level and mental toughness of a 10/11 year old developing pitcher is vastly different then a teenage kid. And the amount of pressure at that age is even more intense as they want to please you so badly.

So now cheering for your child is "getting crazy"? I'd love to see someone tell a parent that they aren't following the "gold standard" because they encouraged their child while they were on the mound.

You simply don't get it "what I am talking about"

I am talking about saying things like this before your kid pitches

"We need a strike here Johnny come on!!!"

"You gotta throw strikes here Johnny baseball loaded, no walks kid!!"

"Johnny bear down...win the battle, we need this"

"Play at home Johnny, if he hits it back to you Johnny"

'Watch the bunt Johnny! Know where your going with the ball"

This is not cheering or encouragement, this is coaching from the stands. You may think this is encouragement but that is putting immense added pressure to your kid.

He knows his job. He knows the situation. He does not need to hear the voice of his parents who he wants to please most saying these things. He already has the pressure of his teammates, coaches and the opposing dugout.

There is only one voice on our field, it is our head coach and our players who talk to each other. No parents voicing their advice or so called encouragement. These are 10,11 year old boys.

After the pitch he throws a strike, ball is hit and caught, whatever.....cheer loudly, clap make some noise. No worries.

Get what I am talking about now?

 

[Sabertooth]

Don't tell me how to parent my kid.

 

[Rogi]

I was at my 8 year old's basketball practice and another parent and I were talking about how every kid on the team can dribble between their legs. When I was that age it was rare to see kids do that.

I noticed with my daughter's volleyball that the kids that do year round volleyball clubs have a huge advantage. Sports just aren't as seasonal as they use to be.

I just encourage my kids to try various sports. Besides the health benefits I really believe kids can learn a lot of life skills through sports: teamwork, work ethic, winning, losing, etc. Not to mention seeing coaches that play favorites with some players...no different than some bosses picking their favorites at work not based on skill.

 

[Todem]

Don't tell me how to parent my kid.

Then dont play on our team. Just keep helicoptering your kid.You are fortunate your kids quit sports. You sound like a nightmare already.

 

[Cjw_55106]

I don't have an issue with not coaching from the stands, but this is just stupid:

When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

No it's not. You don't need to get crazy at this age. They are not seasoned pitchers. There is a ton of pressure on them...more than enough noise coming from the opposing dugout, their own teammates are encouraging them enough/ the head coach throwing in some advice. They don't need to hear their parents from the stands before every pitch.

That is nonsense and not helping them. Trust me. The difference I saw in many kids developing as pitchers without that added parent noise factor is stark.

If that is your opinion so be it. If you don't believe 100% in the coaching and the expectations of the team it is not the right team for you and your son. Simple as that.

I am glad we allow our kids to pitch without parent noise before every pitch. Cheer all you want after the strike call. But while they are on the mound, focusing on the signs, managing base runners and zoning in....leave them the **ck alone.

When they hit 15-16....yeah whatever. They are young adults in the making and it is not nearly that big of a deal. But the maturity level and mental toughness of a 10/11 year old developing pitcher is vastly different then a teenage kid. And the amount of pressure at that age is even more intense as they want to please you so badly.

So now cheering for your child is "getting crazy"? I'd love to see someone tell a parent that they aren't following the "gold standard" because they encouraged their child while they were on the mound.

You simply don't get it "what I am talking about"

I am talking about saying things like this before your kid pitches

"We need a strike here Johnny come on!!!"

"You gotta throw strikes here Johnny baseball loaded, no walks kid!!"

"Johnny bear down...win the battle, we need this"

"Play at home Johnny, if he hits it back to you Johnny"

'Watch the bunt Johnny! Know where your going with the ball"

This is not cheering or encouragement, this is coaching from the stands. You may think this is encouragement but that is putting immense added pressure to your kid.

He knows his job. He knows the situation. He does not need to hear the voice of his parents who he wants to please most saying these things. He already has the pressure of his teammates, coaches and the opposing dugout.

There is only one voice on our field, it is our head coach and our players who talk to each other. No parents voicing their advice or so called encouragement. These are 10,11 year old boys.

After the pitch he throws a strike, ball is hit and caught, whatever.....cheer loudly, clap make some noise. No worries.

Get what I am talking about now?

That's fine if you want to paint it as me not understanding. I was using the same words you did. You said "But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball."

"advice" and "encouragement" are two completely different and unrelated things.

 

[belljr]

There is thought that at a young age.

Even Yelling "You CAN do this" puts added pressure on the player. Even though you are trying to be positive it can still be counter productive.

 

[Todem]

I don't have an issue with not coaching from the stands, but this is just stupid:

When your kid is on the mound. Silence. You can cheer and clap when they throw strikes, get kids out...etc. But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball. Your just adding pressure. DO NOT COACH FROM THE STANDS.

No it's not. You don't need to get crazy at this age. They are not seasoned pitchers. There is a ton of pressure on them...more than enough noise coming from the opposing dugout, their own teammates are encouraging them enough/ the head coach throwing in some advice. They don't need to hear their parents from the stands before every pitch.

That is nonsense and not helping them. Trust me. The difference I saw in many kids developing as pitchers without that added parent noise factor is stark.

If that is your opinion so be it. If you don't believe 100% in the coaching and the expectations of the team it is not the right team for you and your son. Simple as that.

I am glad we allow our kids to pitch without parent noise before every pitch. Cheer all you want after the strike call. But while they are on the mound, focusing on the signs, managing base runners and zoning in....leave them the **ck alone.

When they hit 15-16....yeah whatever. They are young adults in the making and it is not nearly that big of a deal. But the maturity level and mental toughness of a 10/11 year old developing pitcher is vastly different then a teenage kid. And the amount of pressure at that age is even more intense as they want to please you so badly.

So now cheering for your child is "getting crazy"? I'd love to see someone tell a parent that they aren't following the "gold standard" because they encouraged their child while they were on the mound.

You simply don't get it "what I am talking about"

I am talking about saying things like this before your kid pitches

"We need a strike here Johnny come on!!!"

"You gotta throw strikes here Johnny baseball loaded, no walks kid!!"

"Johnny bear down...win the battle, we need this"

"Play at home Johnny, if he hits it back to you Johnny"

'Watch the bunt Johnny! Know where your going with the ball"

This is not cheering or encouragement, this is coaching from the stands. You may think this is encouragement but that is putting immense added pressure to your kid.

He knows his job. He knows the situation. He does not need to hear the voice of his parents who he wants to please most saying these things. He already has the pressure of his teammates, coaches and the opposing dugout.

There is only one voice on our field, it is our head coach and our players who talk to each other. No parents voicing their advice or so called encouragement. These are 10,11 year old boys.

After the pitch he throws a strike, ball is hit and caught, whatever.....cheer loudly, clap make some noise. No worries.

Get what I am talking about now?

That's fine if you want to paint it as me not understanding. I was using the same words you did. You said "But don't coach or talk to them or even encourage them while they are playing ball."

"advice" and "encouragement" are two completely different and unrelated things.

What happens is this. You have parents who think encouragement like "come on Johnny you can do this"! Is helping them. Actually it's not. Because if they strike out or fail they feel awful that they let "you" down. It really puts that much more pressure on them.

We want our boys to relax, have a clear head and focus and deal with the pressures on the field while they develop. Again we are talking about young kids in a huge transition stage.

I am not trying to be argumentative.

And I will tell you. When we held tryouts we handed every parent the "Golden Expectations" manifesto. We said read it carefully and if you have any questions please ask. If you don't agree with anything on there.....this is not the team for your son and your family.

It's not like any of what we expect is a surprise. Our parents sign this along with their son before they are offered a spot on the team. We had several parents leave the tryout before even letting their kid on the field. We were happy about that.

It's not for everyone. And it's not supposed to be for everyone. This is a Majors level travel team with clear goals, a clear vision and clear expectation of how we want our parents and players to conduct themselves.

You would be amazed at the compliments we get after almost every game from umpires and opposing parents of how well conducted our team is on and off the field and how pleasant our parents are during the game. We get numerous requests for tryouts all throughout the season. The reputation of our team is very good in the league we play in. One of the best in fact.

Sometimes parents slip....we get it. Heck I can slip every now and then. It's natural. But the obsessive and constant is not tolerated. It just does not work on our club.

Again......it's not for everyone. But it definitely weeds out what we don't want. And being on some awful travel teams in the past and seeing plenty as well (not skill wise I am talking insane parents and coaches) I learned what I want for my young son and how I hope he can develop and learn and mature into a young man. I was very forth coming with the Matheny Manifesto on this team when we joined it and that is why I was made an assistant coach and team admin. It's working for us. The boys are all very happy, playing hard and playing relaxed. It get's heated on the field, but not because parents are out of hand. It's the competition, and coaching that is intense. And they are eating it up and getting better and better.

. If that is not good for you no problem. This is not the right place for your family. It's OK. It's not for everyone. When we installed this "Golden Expectation" Document we lost 2 kids (families) right off the bat. And they were excellent ball players. But the parents did not agree with it. They liked to coach from the stands and were constantly giving so called encouragement. We want our parents to be their "Silent Source Of Encouragement" Read the book and you will understand that definition.

2 seasons later they begged to come back. But their spots were already filled. And the players (families) that took their spots were probably a little less skilled, but they bought in from the get go and have been awesome.

Anyway I will post how that document reads tonight so you can all see what every parent and player signs before they are offered a spot on the club. That will help clear up any vagueness.