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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (5 Viewers)

General Malaise said:
Talking about this the other day with friends, we were discussing the utterly stupid things we did for the opposite sex to curry their affection or stay in their good nookie giving graces.  In my mid 20s I briefly dated a single mom who was dumber than a pile of dirt, but had a great body and was terrific in the sack.  She worked as a cocktail waitress at a dive bar, never learned how to drive and called me freaked out crying because she thought Bono of U2 had died.  She had confused Sonny Bono with the jagoff lead singer from Ireland.  

Anyhow, for my birthday she bought me this thin, leafy gold bracelet that looked a little like this.  I laughed when she gave it to me and she cried.  From that point forward, I had to wear it when I was around her to avoid any drama.  And I did.  Because sex.  All my friends ridiculed me for it, rightfully so.  After I dumped her, I pawned it.  I got $6 for it.  

I'm sure - no, I KNOW - I've done far more ridiculous things for ladies, but that one made my buddies laugh.  WHATCHAGOT?!?!??!?!
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One time I went shopping and got high with these 2 hot sluts but I had to sit in the back of a ####ty little Mazda (or some stupid car that didn't even have a real back seat, it was like a luggage rack) and had to buy them an ice cream because they wouldn't shut up.  I got nothing out of the deal.  Oh well, I'm sure they were chock full of STD's anyway

 
I went to a Nelson concert in high school.  I'm pretty sure that can't be topped.  Though it did result in relations.

No, not with a Nelson.

 
General Malaise said:
Talking about this the other day with friends, we were discussing the utterly stupid things we did for the opposite sex to curry their affection or stay in their good nookie giving graces.  In my mid 20s I briefly dated a single mom who was dumber than a pile of dirt, but had a great body and was terrific in the sack.  She worked as a cocktail waitress at a dive bar, never learned how to drive and called me freaked out crying because she thought Bono of U2 had died.  She had confused Sonny Bono with the jagoff lead singer from Ireland.  

Anyhow, for my birthday she bought me this thin, leafy gold bracelet that looked a little like this.  I laughed when she gave it to me and she cried.  From that point forward, I had to wear it when I was around her to avoid any drama.  And I did.  Because sex.  All my friends ridiculed me for it, rightfully so.  After I dumped her, I pawned it.  I got $6 for it.  

I'm sure - no, I KNOW - I've done far more ridiculous things for ladies, but that one made my buddies laugh.  WHATCHAGOT?!?!??!?!
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Sounds like my type, still have her number?

 
Didn't someone on this board used to dog-sit for an ex-girlfriend while she dated other guys?  I seem to recall lots of people mentioning that a year or so ago.

 
I got a new student in summer school today.  She's Chinese.  Her first name is something very Chinese like "Xiouxzoufanlung".  Her last name is Wang.

She goes by her American first name.....Cherry.

 
Sconch said:
I got a new student in summer school today.  She's Chinese.  Her first name is something very Chinese like "Xiouxzoufanlung".  Her last name is Wang.

She goes by her American first name.....Cherry.
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Sure.  Cherry Wang.  That's actually my stripper name from the 80s.

 
Rod Stewart Concert with this older MILF when I was in college. 

She could suck the cold out of an ice cube, though. 

 
Sconch said:
Nice!  Looks like the kind of place where the bouncer stops you at the door and asks if you have any weapons on you.  When you say "no" he asks if you want to buy a knife.
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Or if you have a button-up shirt on, he says "Are you a cop?  You know, you have to tell me if you're a cop."

 
Oh, God. I've probably forgotten most of the dumb #### I've done for booty out of self-preservation for my sanity. 

Terrified of roller coasters/heights/high bridges. Went on that damned Rebel Yell at King's Dominion in Virginia back in the late 70s. It was made of wood - WOOD! - and it creaked while taking seven lifetimes to climb the first hill. (paid off)

Same trip - drove across that demon-spawned bridge on US301 from MD into VA and got stopped by an accident right near the top. Watching that bridge sway while oncoming trucks - no divider; one lane each way - come straight at me was a barrel of fun, too. (see above)

Spent 3 weeks running dope from NC to MD because my supplier was hot (didn't pay off). 

I know there's more and dumber things..........

 
Uruk-Hai said:
Oh, God. I've probably forgotten most of the dumb #### I've done for booty out of self-preservation for my sanity. 

Terrified of roller coasters/heights/high bridges. Went on that damned Rebel Yell at King's Dominion in Virginia back in the late 70s. It was made of wood - WOOD! - and it creaked while taking seven lifetimes to climb the first hill. (paid off)

Same trip - drove across that demon-spawned bridge on US301 from MD into VA and got stopped by an accident right near the top. Watching that bridge sway while oncoming trucks - no divider; one lane each way - come straight at me was a barrel of fun, too. (see above)

Spent 3 weeks running dope from NC to MD because my supplier was hot (didn't pay off). 

I know there's more and dumber things..........
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I remember growing up with the Dragon Coaster at Rye Playland in NY.  The last wooden roller coaster in the US!  What a great advertisement: Hey, everyone!  You might die!

 
Uruk-Hai said:
Terrified of roller coasters/heights/high bridges. Went on that damned Rebel Yell at King's Dominion in Virginia back in the late 70s. It was made of wood - WOOD! - and it creaked while taking seven lifetimes to climb the first hill. (paid off)
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I love a wooden roller coaster.  They beat the #### out of you and could fall apart at any given moment but what a ride!

 
My first coaster ride was the (wooden) Timberwolf at Worlds of Fun when I was 8 years old. Not a good introduction to the world of roller coasters. That was one of two times I remember crying on a ride - the other when I was 5, on some really fast, spinning boat ride at the carnival. #### that thing.

 
General Malaise said:
Talking about this the other day with friends, we were discussing the utterly stupid things we did for the opposite sex to curry their affection or stay in their good nookie giving graces.  In my mid 20s I briefly dated a single mom who was dumber than a pile of dirt, but had a great body and was terrific in the sack.  She worked as a cocktail waitress at a dive bar, never learned how to drive and called me freaked out crying because she thought Bono of U2 had died.  She had confused Sonny Bono with the jagoff lead singer from Ireland.  

Anyhow, for my birthday she bought me this thin, leafy gold bracelet that looked a little like this.  I laughed when she gave it to me and she cried.  From that point forward, I had to wear it when I was around her to avoid any drama.  And I did.  Because sex.  All my friends ridiculed me for it, rightfully so.  After I dumped her, I pawned it.  I got $6 for it.  

I'm sure - no, I KNOW - I've done far more ridiculous things for ladies, but that one made my buddies laugh.  WHATCHAGOT?!?!??!?!
Click to expand...
I went to a Tupperware(tm) party.  Actually actually true. :bag:

 
Annyong said:
Hey Abe, are there going to be fireworks when you go on your boat on the 3rd? Next Friday. 
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I was replying to Bentley asking me "which Friday" to which I replied "next Friday."   Thanks for helping though. 

 
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