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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (27 Viewers)

Which reminds me...a pitcher who pitched in one of the playoff games this year has chlamydia.   This chick that was a nanny for a friend's family slept with him when he was playing AAA ball in Tacoma and she got it.  She passed it on to my friend when he banged the nanny.   My friend then gave it to his wife.   Fearing for the repercussions, he bought some antibiotics online and was secretly grinding them up and putting them in her morning protein shake.   Then her doctor called him, said that she had an STD and that he should get checked.   Turns out they were both cheating on each other, and she thought she gave it to him, so he ended up never having to come clean.

 
Which reminds me...a pitcher who pitched in one of the playoff games this year has chlamydia.   This chick that was a nanny for a friend's family slept with him when he was playing AAA ball in Tacoma and she got it.  She passed it on to my friend when he banged the nanny.   My friend then gave it to his wife.   Fearing for the repercussions, he bought some antibiotics online and was secretly grinding them up and putting them in her morning protein shake.   Then her doctor called him, said that she had an STD and that he should get checked.   Turns out they were both cheating on each other, and she thought she gave it to him, so he ended up never having to come clean.
I doubt that either of them will ever, really be clean

 
I need one of those murderdogs to send after my mortgage guy.
my mother was none to happy with my constant usage of this term, when discussing adopting a dog.  there are 100's of murder dogs and to a slightly lesser extent, chihuahuas available.  i don't want either.

 
came home from taking the dog to a dog park this morning. let her in the house, went to take a leak, come out in the living room and she's eating a chocolate bar my kid left on our table. 

maybe... 1 minute left unattended and she was already in to some ####.

we just had a new kennel liner/tray delivered this week BECAUSE SHE ATE THE OLD ONE. she's in a kennel during the day because SHE ####### EATS EVERYTHING IN SIGHT.

and i don't mean she ate the liner/tray over the course of a few weeks or months and we just lazily didn't do anything about it. i forgot to put her in her kennel one morning before leaving for work (because... that's my job), which apparently angered the dog... i guess???? so she ate 3/4ths of her liner/tray. ATE IT.

it's "indestructible". was.

prior to that she ate another "indestructible" doggie bed. my wife only buys "the best" for her pets. ####### bed was 100 bucks or some nonsense. dog ate it. ATE IT, TOMMY. ATE IT.
:lmao: :lmao:    ####### crying laughing over here. :lmao: :lmao:  

can't wait to be a dog owner.

 
Also I'm 99% sure Wendy Malick is narrating my Cub Scouts Youth Protection Training (basically don't diddle kids)
I have to get re-certified in that stuff in the next few weeks. 

The problem is that I LOVE Wendy Malick. Just hearing her voice gets me very aroused.

This is going to be awkward.

 
I went and got a snoot full in the old hood today.  Got home early to find my oldest. He has had some issues with self esteem, unlike all of us here, so I've been on him propping him up.  Cal at 13.5 is 5'9, size 11 shoe.180. He's a beast. ####er won't play football. Head injuries never stopped me I told him.  Not to mention he's strong and handsome*.

He decided to challenge me tonight.  Knocked my ### over. In a playful way. We wrestled for several minutes and I finally had to put my elbow in his throat to get him to stop. He laughed the entire time and said I was old.  Dylan, who was cheering, yelled at him he just got his ### kicked. Barely.

*Looks just like me

 
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I went and got a snoot full in the old hood today.  Got home early to find my oldest. He has had some issues with self esteem, unlike all of us here, so I've been on him propping him up.  Cal at 13.5 is 5'9, size 11 shoe.180. He's a beast. ####er won't play football. Head injuries never stopped me I told him.  Not to mention he's strong and handsome*.

He decided to challenge me tonight.  Knocked my ### over. In a playful way. We wrestled for several minutes and I finally had to put my elbow in his throat to get him to stop. He laughed the entire time and said I was old.  Dylan, who was cheering, yelled at him he just got his ### kicked. Barely.

*Looks just like me
Do either one of them have paypal?  I'll send them each $20 to gang up on you.

 
Is it "soiled/" $25
Auctioneer: We'll open this auction with a red hoodie Tanner confiscated off one of his students that says "Pismo Beach Life Guard" on it.
Cos: Fifty bucks!
Auctioneer: The student reportedly had nine STDs.
Cos: Forty-five bucks.
Auctioneer: When Tanner confiscated the hoodie, the student wet themselves.
Cos: Fifty bucks!!!

 
Needed an easy dinner last night with soccer all day in monsoon season so went with the Lazy Man's Pulled Pork recipe popular in the slow cooker thread.  It was....ok, kids loved it, but certainly not worth the acclaim.  It did, however, require me to buy a 2 litre bottle of root beer, and tonight, I used that left over root beer to make Hazel her first ever root beer float.  There is a new ruler in this castle now, for I am now her C3PO to her Ewok.  Move over, wifey. 

 
Needed an easy dinner last night with soccer all day in monsoon season so went with the Lazy Man's Pulled Pork recipe popular in the slow cooker thread.  It was....ok, kids loved it, but certainly not worth the acclaim.  It did, however, require me to buy a 2 litre bottle of root beer, and tonight, I used that left over root beer to make Hazel her first ever root beer float.  There is a new ruler in this castle now, for I am now her C3PO to her Ewok.  Move over, wifey. 
i didn't read Harry Potter

 

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