GM's thread about nothing (38 Viewers)

[bostonfred]

STL, my sons gf gave him the sappiest card ever for his birthday. Front says "It's a Love Story" and inside says "and my happily ever after is you" while it plays Romeo take me somewhere we can be alone... that Taylor Swift song. Chicks like sappy.

This would make me vomit. But I have an unusually low tolerance for sap, I think.

You and I along with YSR and jamyp are not the traditional sappy chicks these guys marry. Thats why we're here...and they're not.

Interesting. I didn't marry a sappy girl, and I'm glad she's not here.

 

[Celph Titled]

Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pics at Tyler have rendered the rest of the female gender obsolete. Sorry, ladies.

 

[zander_s]

Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pics at Tyler have rendered the rest of the female gender obsolete. Sorry, ladies.

 

[McJose]

I just got out of bed like an hour ago. I should feel somewhat guilty but I don't.

 

[ffjunk]

I woke up in the middle of the night last night, my head pounding, and realized it is my 15th wedding anniversary next Thursday.

A quick Google search shows that for the 15th crystal is the traditional gift and glass is the modern gift.

Should I go with Irish crystal or Irish glasses?

Holy ####! My 15th is next Thursday too. Crystal? I don't think my idea of Crystal and her idea will be the same.

 

[Thorn]

So I used this one from the literal joke thread as my FB status today:

your mother is so obese she developed adult-onset type II diabetes and had to have her foot amputated.

and got this reply from a girl I went to high school with (who incidentally now teaches at the HS we went to, which I always found odd):

Wow you're harsh today.... It should say yo mama is so...... Haha

God I ####### hate people sometimes.

 

[jplvr]

God, I hate Facebook.

 

[EYLive]

Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pics at Tyler have rendered the rest of the female gender obsolete. Sorry, ladies.

Even after a baby, I still prefer her over Lima. And it's not close.

 

[kevzilla]

The immediate post after this one won't make any sense whatsoever. Whatever the hell it was I thought I was posting here initially was dumb. But what's not dumb is what's followed. It's a collective work, with contributions from some of this boards best and brightest. In here, you'll find wedding updates from me, adventures in the life of St. Louis Bob, a romantic epic from Homer Simpson, a recap of Bonzai's trip to Germany to watch their squad play in the World Cup, Cosjobs' masterpiece and snaptastic, witty replies by the best online miscreants I know...Bob Sacamano, Tanner Boyle, Truck, Shuke, Pickles, Krista, YSR, Fatguy, Boston Fred, Ferris, Frosty, Stu, Thorn, Gad, Kev, Charv and if I missed anyone, please let me know.

This thread is safeguarded by Rudnicki. He's got our back, and we've got his. Chip into the beer fund for Rude to keep this thread alive.

A tribute to what was, what should be and what can be: The FFA

Quoted for posterity...and so you don't have to go back to the OP after reading YSR's post above.

Schizophrenia's cousin is kinda hot.

 

[Exit 1]

Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pics at Tyler have rendered the rest of the female gender obsolete. Sorry, ladies.

Even after a baby, I still prefer her over Lima. And it's not close.

I saw that Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr got married.:biggamer4:

 

[Josie Maran]

The immediate post after this one won't make any sense whatsoever. Whatever the hell it was I thought I was posting here initially was dumb. But what's not dumb is what's followed. It's a collective work, with contributions from some of this boards best and brightest. In here, you'll find wedding updates from me, adventures in the life of St. Louis Bob, a romantic epic from Homer Simpson, a recap of Bonzai's trip to Germany to watch their squad play in the World Cup, Cosjobs' masterpiece and snaptastic, witty replies by the best online miscreants I know...Bob Sacamano, Tanner Boyle, Truck, Shuke, Pickles, Krista, YSR, Fatguy, Boston Fred, Ferris, Frosty, Stu, Thorn, Gad, Kev, Charv and if I missed anyone, please let me know.

This thread is safeguarded by Rudnicki. He's got our back, and we've got his. Chip into the beer fund for Rude to keep this thread alive.

A tribute to what was, what should be and what can be: The FFA

Quoted for posterity...and so you don't have to go back to the OP after reading YSR's post above.

I noticed that too.

 

[General Malaise]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

 

[urbanhack]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

jesus...this country is getting dumber by the second.

 

[Josie Maran]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

I'd love to be a fly on the tent during that meeting of the minds.

 

[Sammy3469]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

I'm pretty sure the good ol' US of A has passed me by. It's been fun

 

[Celph Titled]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

I'd love to be a fly on the tent during that meeting of the minds.

Pretty sure there are no flies in Alaska, GB.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I woke up in the middle of the night last night, my head pounding, and realized it is my 15th wedding anniversary next Thursday.

A quick Google search shows that for the 15th crystal is the traditional gift and glass is the modern gift.

Should I go with Irish crystal or Irish glasses?

Holy ####! My 15th is next Thursday too. Crystal? I don't think my idea of Crystal and her idea will be the same.

I'm sorry to hear that.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

I could put on a wig and fly on up.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Headline on Yahoo: KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

KATE Gosselin is set to meet up with Sarah Palin in Alaska — for a camping trip!

According to reports, the reality TV star and her eight kids will be heading to the northern state with cameras in tow to meet up with its most famous resident.

“Sarah, Kate and the kids will go camping,” a source told In Touch Weekly magazine.

“Sarah’s father, a retired science teacher, and brother, a third-grade educator, will conduct a hands-on natural history lesson for 9-year-old twins Mady and Cara, and 6-year-old sextuplets Aaden, Joel, Collin, Leah, Hannah and Alexis.

“Sarah’s excited because it will be fun and educational for the children. Sarah will even teach Kate how to avoid bears!”

Recent reports claimed Kate — who’s divorced from husband Jon — thinks it’ll be easy for her to find another man.

“Kate’s confidence is amazing,” a source told the PopEater website. “She thinks she is a fantastic catch. Not only does she think she has never looked better, Kate also now has a ton of money.

“As far as she’s concerned, there is nothing not to like. She’s beautiful, rich and thinks of herself as very easy to get along with.

“Kate is constantly flirting with all the hot male reporters she meets.

“She has a sparkle in her eye and gets all giddy when she’s bossing reporters around. At first, we thought she was happy because she was talking about herself. Then we realized she was looking for a date.”

Does the mafia have any way to contact a Grizzly Bear for hire?

:topsecret:

 

[Exit 1]

http://wonderful-russia.net/img/illustrations-WW2/1.jpg

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Use your points to get the cheapest round trip ticket they have and spend the remaining points on crystal.

Cornhole?

In Vegas? Maybe in the fall. When are you thinking?

I'm going to Vegas 9/21. My wallet and body couldn't take a Vegas trip that close together.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

or a vacuum cleaner

I've bought her a vacuum cleaner as a gift. Twice. She was really happy both times. Too bad she has some sort of "Momento" thing going on when it comes to using them.

I just got home and surpirse!, the whole house is vacuumed.

"Erase that now!"Although she saw me take it and even asked "what are you going to send that to somebody?"

Interesting. I didn't marry a sappy girl, and I'm glad she's not here.

Maybe a sappy girl poll needs to be set up?

 

[Disco Stu]

Unsolicited advice for my GBs...If your wife wants new boobs, just go ahead and spend the money on a divorce lawyer instead. Save yourself some time and money.

Totally agree. I have very little interest in fake cans and even less interest in the women who want them.What's the backstory here?

Met one last night who provided another example of the new boobs not being for the husband. They're for her and any random people she may come into contact with. This is a fairly new friend of a friend, who didn't know anyone else in the group. Two or three week old implants she was was very excited about. She ended up flashing the table a couple times. Appeared to be some solid work by the doctor. Realistic Cs. I had to pass on a quiet invitation to see and feel them somewhere a little more private though. Too many complications with another girl in attendance.

The husband should have a GPS on those 3 week old boobs. Why would he let his wife out of the house with her new boobs? Did he really think she wasn't going to want to show them off?What was the age of the chick?

Husband is SOL. She told him three days ago that she wanted a divorce. Quickest boob job to curb transition I've seen.Great timing since they've got a 10 day European cruise starting this weekend. That won't be awkward. And they're both 25. Married 3 years. No kids.

Just got off the phone with her.

 

[Celph Titled]

Just got off the phone with her.

:mityh:

 

[Sammy3469]

or a vacuum cleaner

I've bought her a vacuum cleaner as a gift. Twice. She was really happy both times. Too bad she has some sort of "Momento" thing going on when it comes to using them.

I just got home and surpirse!, the whole house is vacuumed.

Pretty sure you're screwed now

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

or a vacuum cleaner

I've bought her a vacuum cleaner as a gift. Twice. She was really happy both times. Too bad she has some sort of "Momento" thing going on when it comes to using them.

I just got home and surpirse!, the whole house is vacuumed.

Pretty sure you're screwed now

Ruh roh.Momento was that movie about the chick that vacuumed a lot, right?

 

[Disco Stu]

Just got off the phone with her.

:mityh:

I'm gonna have to call the Celph Help line to translate that one.

 

[guru_007]

love this thread

 

[Tremendous Upside]

Just got off the phone with her.

:mityh:

I'm gonna have to call the Celph Help line to translate that one.

Man In The Yellow Hat

 

[Sammy3469]

or a vacuum cleaner

I've bought her a vacuum cleaner as a gift. Twice. She was really happy both times. Too bad she has some sort of "Momento" thing going on when it comes to using them.

I just got home and surpirse!, the whole house is vacuumed.

Pretty sure you're screwed now

Ruh roh.Momento was that movie about the chick that vacuumed a lot, right?

That too...out of the blue vacuuming always leads to bad Honey-Do lists. Pretty sure SLB should have invested in maid service named Crystal.

 

[Disco Stu]

Just got off the phone with her.

:mityh:

I'm gonna have to call the Celph Help line to translate that one.

Man In The Yellow Hat

I should invite her on a camping trip?She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

 

[Thorn]

Just got off the phone with her.

:mityh:

I'm gonna have to call the Celph Help line to translate that one.

Man In The Yellow Hat

I should invite her on a camping trip?She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

This husband, how big a fella we talkin?

 

[Tremendous Upside]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

 

[Oh Yes!]

i got a piece of rice lodged way up in my nose.

 

[McJose]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

That's legally binding in Nevada, Vermont, Puerto Rico, and American Samoa.

 

[Thorn]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

That's legally binding in Nevada, Vermont, Puerto Rico, and American Samoa.

That is crack Hennipin County legal analysis right there.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

That too...out of the blue vacuuming always leads to bad Honey-Do lists. Pretty sure SLB should have invested in maid service named Crystal.

I like this idea.Mrs. SLB was playing Family Feud on Facebook yesterday and the fast money question was "Things wives nag their husband about." She couldn't think of anything.

Hey GM, check out my Twinkie.

 

[The_Man]

or a vacuum cleaner

I've bought her a vacuum cleaner as a gift. Twice. She was really happy both times. Too bad she has some sort of "Momento" thing going on when it comes to using them.

I just got home and surpirse!, the whole house is vacuumed.

She's got this place bugged.

 

[Early_10]

Alessandra Ambrosio bikini pics at Tyler have rendered the rest of the female gender obsolete. Sorry, ladies.

Until she's doing my husband, I have unlimited potential.

 

[Tremendous Upside]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

That's legally binding in Nevada, Vermont, Puerto Rico, and American Samoa.

I believe Guam and Maine still require an additional Tweeting and a comment on a youtube video before it's official

 

[St. Louis Bob]

or a vacuum cleaner

I've bought her a vacuum cleaner as a gift. Twice. She was really happy both times. Too bad she has some sort of "Momento" thing going on when it comes to using them.

I just got home and surpirse!, the whole house is vacuumed.

She's got this place bugged.

Then I'm screwed.

 

[Disco Stu]

This husband, how big a fella we talkin?

Looks pretty average.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

i got a piece of rice lodged way up in my nose.

Farmer blow?

 

[Sideshow Bob]

Good Newz. Not hugoverbad news. still drunk :banned

In what world is this bad news?

 

[Disco Stu]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

RECENT ACTIVITY

_____ is no longer listed as "married."

 

[Early_10]

That too...out of the blue vacuuming always leads to bad Honey-Do lists. Pretty sure SLB should have invested in maid service named Crystal.

I like this idea.Mrs. SLB was playing Family Feud on Facebook yesterday and the fast money question was "Things wives nag their husband about." She couldn't think of anything.

Hey GM, check out my Twinkie.

*** SPOILER ALERT! Click this link to display the potential spoiler text in this box. ***");document.close();

If it had ballls...

 

[jplvr]

That too...out of the blue vacuuming always leads to bad Honey-Do lists. Pretty sure SLB should have invested in maid service named Crystal.

I like this idea.Mrs. SLB was playing Family Feud on Facebook yesterday and the fast money question was "Things wives nag their husband about." She couldn't think of anything.

Hey GM, check out my Twinkie.

*** SPOILER ALERT! Click this link to display the potential spoiler text in this box. ***

");document.close();

If it had ballls...it would be your uncle?

 

[St. Louis Bob]

That too...out of the blue vacuuming always leads to bad Honey-Do lists. Pretty sure SLB should have invested in maid service named Crystal.

I like this idea.Mrs. SLB was playing Family Feud on Facebook yesterday and the fast money question was "Things wives nag their husband about." She couldn't think of anything.

Hey GM, check out my Twinkie.

*** SPOILER ALERT! Click this link to display the potential spoiler text in this box. ***

");document.close();

If it had ballls...My Twinkie. It's bigger. I think deserts can be very sensuous, don't you?

 

[Josie Maran]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

RECENT ACTIVITY

_____ is no longer listed as "married."

Good enough for me.Actually, good enough for me includes the husband being out of town, or out with his buddies, or in a different room. So maybe I'm not the best moral compass a guy could utilize.

 

[Thorn]

She hasn't filed for divorce yet but has changed her last name on facebook. Officialish.

Pretty sure that's all it takes these days

That's legally binding in Nevada, Vermont, Puerto Rico, and American Samoa.

I believe Guam and Maine still require an additional Tweeting and a comment on a youtube video before it's official

Actually Maine just requires both child seats be in the Cavalier instead of one in the F150.