GM's thread about nothing (26 Viewers)

[St. Louis Bob]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

Sorry to hear about your trouble making friends

 

[cosjobs]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

I think you meant to use the present participle and not the gerund.

 

[Marvin]

I like when girls come over for morning sex. Surprising, I know, but it's really enjoyable. Recommend.

Let us know when it finally happens.

 

[Marvin]

http://louisvsrick.com/post/22385502243/episode-15-to-belittle-and-to-be-little

Finally!"i know thats what makes it so horrifying"

 

[Marvin]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

You make that dog walk that whole 5 miles?About a week ago the wife and I took the dogs on about a 2 mile walk. They're both midgets so that was like 20 miles for them. About halfway through one of them looked at me like "Oh, this is bull####".

 

[Marvin]

Speaking of dogs driving

 

[phishphan]

Speaking of dogs driving

 

[Drifter]

shammered. my day included knuckles, paralegal and all three twenty-somethings. it was like an episode of battle of the network stars, only with crazy chicks.

I should have gotten drunk tonight. Fat chance of me having ANY fun this weekend. Relay for Life related events Fri-Sun. At the risk of sounding like a total jerkbag I don't see the point in attending the actual Relay. We've raised around $17,000 since January or so (a big thanks again to everyone here who donated). We might actually make another couple of hundred at the event from selling raffle tickets but we could have done that at our other 2 fundraisers. I'm still trying to figure out how walking around some track, in shifts, for 24 hours is going to do jack. It's not a jog-a-thon. Yeah, I'm pretty much a tool.

I wondered about this, too. I assumed that it was some kind of deal where you got a pledge of X dollars per mile or lap. Apparently it's nothing like that at all.Nobody's going to know whether you actually show up and walk it.

seattle question--I signed up for a free month on match.com. why is it that there are so many mid-30s hot chicks in Bothell?

My thoughts -It's North, not South (that matters to "young urban professionals" here)It's kind of East side in price but not East side (married with kids land)It's not as expensive as downtown and at mid 30s they really don't want to be downtown any moreLots of new construction and that trendy manufactured urban center/town center feel that chicks this age seem to love

 

[proninja]

huh. I guess that 9-5 thing just went out the window.

Does this mean she just reached out to you???

yep. guess having her break up with knuckles stirred up some stuff.

Your signature is finally accurate

So I finally broke through email and got green-lighted to meet this Bothell chick for after-work drinks. If I'm in Seattle and she lives in Bothell, where's a good place halfway between?

Bellevue

 

[proninja]

I'm about to embark on my first ever crossfit workout. I haven't done a pushup in ages. If I'm too sore to type for a few weeks, I'll catch you guys later.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

Thank god GM taught you to spell lightning.

 

[nysportsfan]

My secretary just farted. Loud. How does this stuff happen?

 

[Tiger Fan]

gone for 3 days and have 10 pages to catch up on

and don't forget the now mandatory "Falling Slowly" thread. Godspeed GB on your reading.

pretty sure you can forget that thread. It be goners

finally caught up.

 

[Marvin]

My secretary just farted. Loud. How does this stuff happen?

Flatulence is the expulsion through the rectum of a mixture of gases that are byproducts of the digestion process of mammals and other animals. The medical term for the mixture of gases is flatus, informally known as a fart, or simply (in American English) gas. The gases are expelled from the rectum in a process colloquially referred to as "passing gas", "breaking wind" or "farting". Flatus is brought to the rectum by the same peristaltic process which causes feces to descend from the large intestine. The noises commonly associated with flatulence are caused by the vibration of the anal sphincter, and occasionally by the closed buttocks.

 

[Marvin]

Ambush foiled times infinities

 

[phishphan]

My secretary just farted. Loud. How does this stuff happen?

Flatulence is the expulsion through the rectum of a mixture of gases that are byproducts of the digestion process of mammals and other animals. The medical term for the mixture of gases is flatus, informally known as a fart, or simply (in American English) gas. The gases are expelled from the rectum in a process colloquially referred to as "passing gas", "breaking wind" or "farting". Flatus is brought to the rectum by the same peristaltic process which causes feces to descend from the large intestine. The noises commonly associated with flatulence are caused by the vibration of the anal sphincter, and occasionally by the closed buttocks.

get a look at Mr. wizard over here. <_<

 

[Tiger Fan]

If you're not following Jesus on twitter...you should be.

Again, sorry Yankees fans. Dad was trying to get LeBron's knee. He's as ####### inaccurate as Tebow lately.

You know when you hear a friend repeat something you said, but mess it up completely? Now imagine a billion people doing that.

That Last Supper painting got it all wrong. Where's the kick ### Ray-Bans I was wearing that night?

A few other good ones in there that might get me banned

 

[krista4]

gone for 3 days and have 10 pages to catch up on

and don't forget the now mandatory "Falling Slowly" thread. Godspeed GB on your reading.

pretty sure you can forget that thread. It be goners

Did I miss something in the middle of the night? What happened?

I assume that krista asked to have it killed.

Si, senor. It was causing unnecessary pain and embarrassment (not to me).

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

Thank god GM taught you to spell lightning.

You're so smart. I thought it was like a Stephen King Thinner moment for him.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

gone for 3 days and have 10 pages to catch up on

and don't forget the now mandatory "Falling Slowly" thread. Godspeed GB on your reading.

pretty sure you can forget that thread. It be goners

Did I miss something in the middle of the night? What happened?

I assume that krista asked to have it killed.

Si, senor. It was causing unnecessary pain and embarrassment (not to me).

I assume you will fight for custody of all of us?

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

Thank god GM taught you to spell lightning.

You're so smart. I thought it was like a Stephen King Thinner moment for him.

 

[Marvin]

gone for 3 days and have 10 pages to catch up on

and don't forget the now mandatory "Falling Slowly" thread. Godspeed GB on your reading.

pretty sure you can forget that thread. It be goners

Did I miss something in the middle of the night? What happened?

I assume that krista asked to have it killed.

Si, senor. It was causing unnecessary pain and embarrassment (not to me).

I assume you will fight for custody of all of us?

Does this mean we get TWO Christmases?

 

[Sweet J]

If you're not following Jesus on twitter...you should be.

Holy crap there are some funny ones:

I spoke in parables because #### you, that’s why.

My mom is bragging about the time her water and her hymen broke at the same time.

Just had to chase Whitney Houston away from my baking powder for the third time this week.

 

[phishphan]

gone for 3 days and have 10 pages to catch up on

and don't forget the now mandatory "Falling Slowly" thread. Godspeed GB on your reading.

pretty sure you can forget that thread. It be goners

Did I miss something in the middle of the night? What happened?

I assume that krista asked to have it killed.

Si, senor. It was causing unnecessary pain and embarrassment (not to me).

I assume you will fight for custody of all of us?

Does this mean we get TWO Christmases?

oooohhhh. I'm starting my list now!

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Had a christmas list joke, but it's probably too soon.

 

[Marvin]

This Relay for Life thing is just destroying my weekend. I've had to turn down all kinds of invites. Here's the butcher's bill so far:

Drinks after work today with the cool kids.

Happy hour tonight with my buddy and his wife at my favorite wine/beer bar. Another good buddy and his wife also asked earlier in the week if we wanted to go tonight.

Fights/beer/bbq over at my boss's house on Saturday.

Not sure if it has screwed up my Sunday yet but there's still plenty of time.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

Sorry to hear about your trouble making friends

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

You make that dog walk that whole 5 miles?About a week ago the wife and I took the dogs on about a 2 mile walk. They're both midgets so that was like 20 miles for them. About halfway through one of them looked at me like "Oh, this is bull####".

Actually I've been walking 8 miles a day since the beginning of February. The dog loves it and mopes around all morning until we go.and @ bolded

Thank God some chick offered me & the dog (kinky) a ride. I was really close to being hit by lightening.

Thank god GM taught you to spell lightning.

GBAM

This Relay for Life thing is just destroying my weekend. I've had to turn down all kinds of invites. Here's the butcher's bill so far:

Drinks after work today with the cool kids.

Happy hour tonight with my buddy and his wife at my favorite wine/beer bar. Another good buddy and his wife also asked earlier in the week if we wanted to go tonight.

Fights/beer/bbq over at my boss's house on Saturday.

Not sure if it has screwed up my Sunday yet but there's still plenty of time.

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

 

[Marvin]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

 

[Marvin]

Actually I've been walking 8 miles a day since the beginning of February.

Good luck in your new career as a Jehovah's Witness mail-carrier.

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

I'll have a few for you this weekend, Marvin.

 

[Marvin]

I'll have a few for you this weekend, Marvin.

I feel better already.

 

[King_Kelly]

Holy smokes. I think something just happened with one of my post surgical stitches. I'll be back.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

Oh, yeah that's stupid. I thought the MS walk was stupid but I've at least had people say they saw us walking from there car. Not sure what walking in a circle does. Oh wait, YOU'RE RAISING AWARENESS!!! Because nobody has ever heard of cancer.

Actually I've been walking 8 miles a day since the beginning of February.

Good luck in your new career as a Jehovah's Witness mail-carrier.

I either pulled a muscle in my groin, have a hernia or ball cancer. I plan on drinking my pain away. Possibly in Margaritaville, tonight.

 

[King_Kelly]

Holy smokes. I think something just happened with one of my post surgical stitches. I'll be back.

Yep. It popped. I bet the guy who came into the mens room when I was investigating the situation in the mirror wishes he would have picked a different time to poop.I don't feel too bad since he was an interloper from another floor that uses our mens room to go #2. We call them poopetrators.

 

[Sweet J]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

I don't understand while getting drunk doesn't square up with this. Can't you walk in a circle drunk? And then pass out on the field? Then wake up and walk some more? Seems to me the ONLY way to do this would be drunk.

 

[proninja]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

I don't understand while getting drunk doesn't square up with this. Can't you walk in a circle drunk? And then pass out on the field? Then wake up and walk some more? Seems to me the ONLY way to do this would be drunk.

This one. It's not like you're going to be doing anything super high intensity. Bring a flask. Smile a lot.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

I don't understand while getting drunk doesn't square up with this. Can't you walk in a circle drunk? And then pass out on the field? Then wake up and walk some more? Seems to me the ONLY way to do this would be drunk.

This one. It's not like you're going to be doing anything super high intensity. Bring a flask. Smile a lot.

These guys get it. Rent a segway while you're at it.

 

[General Malaise]

Trying to sorta catch up...1. GL Krista... and Mr Krista.2. ####### Mavs.2. Kinda drunk but taking the day off tomorrow.3. GM, hire movers. Totally worth it.4. Speaking of movers, I might put an offer on a house in the next twelve hours.5. Is Catfish Cal's pirate shirt just a coincidence? Or is he intentionally matching the treasure hunting theme?6. GF will be invited to move into the new house, which means I"m ever closer to being a poor, dumb *******.7. There seems to be some sort of "responsible adult" thing happening here.8. I just made crock pot chicken to pics/videos from my "glory days". RIP9. Wish I hadn't numbered these.

Congrats, you poor dumb *******

 

[Marvin]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

Can't you drink after you walk? It'll be even better then.

I supposed I could but...Tonight/this evening I have to help with set up. No idea how long that will take. Doesn't really matter because I have to be at the Relay site at like 6:freaking 30AM.Not sure how long I have to stay on Saturday but there is a good chance that even if I am not there all day I will have to be "on call" to ferry crap out to the site (which is on the absolute opposite side of town from me).Then back Sunday AM for break down and clean up.

 

[Marvin]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

I don't understand while getting drunk doesn't square up with this. Can't you walk in a circle drunk? And then pass out on the field? Then wake up and walk some more? Seems to me the ONLY way to do this would be drunk.

No alcohol allowed. I'm tempted to sneak stuff in but I want to be able to drive away at the first sign that I can leave.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Trying to sorta catch up...1. GL Krista... and Mr Krista.2. ####### Mavs.2. Kinda drunk but taking the day off tomorrow.3. GM, hire movers. Totally worth it.4. Speaking of movers, I might put an offer on a house in the next twelve hours.5. Is Catfish Cal's pirate shirt just a coincidence? Or is he intentionally matching the treasure hunting theme?6. GF will be invited to move into the new house, which means I"m ever closer to being a poor, dumb *******.7. There seems to be some sort of "responsible adult" thing happening here.8. I just made crock pot chicken to pics/videos from my "glory days". RIP9. Wish I hadn't numbered these.

Congrats, GB. Don't worry. I'm sure this one is different. This time it's true love imo.

 

[Marvin]

Damn, I was so wrapped up in my own pity-party I didn't see the part about Disco Stu moving in with his GF.

Good job going full homo on us, guy.

 

[Disco Stu]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

If it makes you feel better, next weekend I'm going to be curing cancer by drinking obscene amounts of beer.

 

[Marvin]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

If it makes you feel better, next weekend I'm going to be curing cancer by drinking obscene amounts of beer.

How was the mullet toss?

 

[Disco Stu]

Congrats, GB. Don't worry. I'm sure this one is different. This time it's true love imo.

Damn, I was so wrapped up in my own pity-party I didn't see the part about Disco Stu moving in with his GF.Good job going full homo on us, guy.

Thanks friends.

 

[Disco Stu]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

If it makes you feel better, next weekend I'm going to be curing cancer by drinking obscene amounts of beer.

How was the mullet toss?

I haven't heard. Probably lame, since none of the guys who like talking to girls could make it this year.I decided to use my time off on a week of fishing in Canada instead. Early June with my Dad's fishing buddies. That's where he wanted his ashes. Bringing my son too. Should be special.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Trying to sorta catch up...1. GL Krista... and Mr Krista.2. ####### Mavs.2. Kinda drunk but taking the day off tomorrow.3. GM, hire movers. Totally worth it.4. Speaking of movers, I might put an offer on a house in the next twelve hours.5. Is Catfish Cal's pirate shirt just a coincidence? Or is he intentionally matching the treasure hunting theme?6. GF will be invited to move into the new house, which means I"m ever closer to being a poor, dumb *******.7. There seems to be some sort of "responsible adult" thing happening here.8. I just made crock pot chicken to pics/videos from my "glory days". RIP9. Wish I hadn't numbered these.

Congrats, GB. Don't worry. I'm sure this one is different. This time it's true love imo.

Plus the sex. WHOA THE SEX!! It's pretty awesome really. Air traffic controllers and the guys that make sure the trains run on time got nothing on me.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

If it makes you feel better, next weekend I'm going to be curing cancer by drinking obscene amounts of beer.

How was the mullet toss?

I haven't heard. Probably lame, since none of the guys who like talking to girls could make it this year.I decided to use my time off on a week of fishing in Canada instead. Early June with my Dad's fishing buddies. That's where he wanted his ashes. Bringing my son too. Should be special.

:( Good for you, GB.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Sorry to hear you have to get drunk this weekend.

No, I CAN'T get drunk this weekend. Those are the things I don't get to do this weekend because I'M GOING TO BE CURING CANCER BY WALKING IN A CIRCLE.

If it makes you feel better, next weekend I'm going to be curing cancer by drinking obscene amounts of beer.

How was the mullet toss?

I haven't heard. Probably lame, since none of the guys who like talking to girls could make it this year.I decided to use my time off on a week of fishing in Canada instead. Early June with my Dad's fishing buddies. That's where he wanted his ashes. Bringing my son too. Should be special.

Catch the fish you intend to eat before you dump his ashes in the lake. Sounds like a good experience for the boy. Should be time to pop him a beer imo.