GM's thread about nothing (44 Viewers)

[Fuller]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

My buddy's wife is a teacher (5th or 6th grade i think) She said at her last parent/teacher conference she had one set of parents that after 5 minutes of discussing the normal stuff the father says "ok, be honest, is our kid an a##hole? Because if he is then that's a reflection on us. Seems like most kids are a##holes and I think it's because their parents are a##holes. Be honest, I won't be offended, it's not your fault if he's an a##hole." She tried not to laugh and told them that their kid was one the nicest students she has and the Dad looks at the Mom and says "I don't know, he could turn into an a##hole at any point, lets stay on top of this." She said it was the best conference she ever had.

I like that dad. We need more like him because he's right, most kids are a##holes.

 

[Buck Bradcanon]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

Whoa. There's a human being behind the cat pics!

Much respect..I enjoy the sincere posts from you, even if it was the sauce talking last night.

 

[Frostillicus]

Tomorrow I have to listen to a 3 hour presentation on some market research, and then lead a 2.5 hour brainstorming session which includes things like giving everyone in the group 10 stickers they can use to vote for the best ideas (all ideas will be written on a giant post-it note) but plot twist you can use as many stickers as you want for one idea. 10 stickers for one idea. 5 for 2. Even something crazy like 5 for one, 3 for another, and then 1 for two others.

Seriously this makes me want to die.

Also known as "power dotting"

This sounds like more your thing than mind. Can you fly in quick?

 

[mr roboto]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

My buddy's wife is a teacher (5th or 6th grade i think) She said at her last parent/teacher conference she had one set of parents that after 5 minutes of discussing the normal stuff the father says "ok, be honest, is our kid an a##hole? Because if he is then that's a reflection on us. Seems like most kids are a##holes and I think it's because their parents are a##holes. Be honest, I won't be offended, it's not your fault if he's an a##hole." She tried not to laugh and told them that their kid was one the nicest students she has and the Dad looks at the Mom and says "I don't know, he could turn into an a##hole at any point, lets stay on top of this." She said it was the best conference she ever had.

This is good shtick.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I don't need any more ####### girl scout cookies. Jeez.

Damn, I haven't seen a single Girl Scout all year and would love some Tagalongs and Thin Mints right now. :(

(This sounded a little like a Homer post, except without the cookie references.)

We have a few boxes left over from my daughter's indentured servitude fundraising efforts. If you really want some, send me a PM with your next address.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Tomorrow I have to listen to a 3 hour presentation on some market research, and then lead a 2.5 hour brainstorming session which includes things like giving everyone in the group 10 stickers they can use to vote for the best ideas (all ideas will be written on a giant post-it note) but plot twist you can use as many stickers as you want for one idea. 10 stickers for one idea. 5 for 2. Even something crazy like 5 for one, 3 for another, and then 1 for two others.

Seriously this makes me want to die.

Idea: lets not do this

Stickers: all

Seriously, that sounds so awful. T&P's GB.

There are people that eat exercises like that up. They all need to die.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

A little late (much like the promotion), but congrats Drifter!!!

Congrats, gb!

 

[Bob Sacamano]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

You might be able to purify polluted water, but you can't turn piss into Cabernet. You do what you can with the ones you can. Anybody who asks more from you - even if that somebody is you - is being unrealistic.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Have we gotten a post Wrestlemania report from Tigerfan?

Please don't encourage this.

Edit: too late

 

[Bob Sacamano]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

 

[proninja]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

Yeah, I hate golfing in the sun too

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

Whoa. There's a human being behind the cat pics!

Much respect..I enjoy the sincere posts from you, even if it was the sauce talking last night.

in vino* veritas

*30 proof King Cake flavored vodka.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

Better hydrate, homie

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Have we gotten a post Wrestlemania report from Tigerfan?

Some people yelled into a microphone.

A couple of guys got oiled up and became uncomfortably close, while touching each other in sensitive areas.

Some small dude improbably beat a guy who was much larger than him.

Somebody who was bad turned good. Or somebody who was good turned bad.

Something shocking that could never possibly happen actually happened, and the announcers were apoplectic about it.

A bunch of rednecks and virgins got drunk and WAY too into it all.

People outside the ring got into fights.

My guy is better than your guy, 'cause your guy sucks. And probably won't let ric flair shoot a load in his pooper.

The end.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

Better hydrate, homie

There's water in beer.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

Yeah, I hate golfing in the sun too

I suck at golf. I golf to drink beer and to enjoy being outside. Being outside when it's 100 and sunny in April is not enjoyable. And it turns out they serve beer in air conditioned buildings.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Have we gotten a post Wrestlemania report from Tigerfan?

Some people yelled into a microphone.

A couple of guys got oiled up and became uncomfortably close, while touching each other in sensitive areas.

Some small dude improbably beat a guy who was much larger than him.

Somebody who was bad turned good. Or somebody who was good turned bad.

Something shocking that could never possibly happen actually happened, and the announcers were apoplectic about it.

A bunch of rednecks and virgins got drunk and WAY too into it all.

People outside the ring got into fights.

My guy is better than your guy, 'cause your guy sucks. And probably won't let ric flair shoot a load in his pooper.

The end.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

if you don't like the weather in April, it must really suck in July/August.

 

[Tiger Fan]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

My buddy's wife is a teacher (5th or 6th grade i think) She said at her last parent/teacher conference she had one set of parents that after 5 minutes of discussing the normal stuff the father says "ok, be honest, is our kid an a##hole? Because if he is then that's a reflection on us. Seems like most kids are a##holes and I think it's because their parents are a##holes. Be honest, I won't be offended, it's not your fault if he's an a##hole." She tried not to laugh and told them that their kid was one the nicest students she has and the Dad looks at the Mom and says "I don't know, he could turn into an a##hole at any point, lets stay on top of this." She said it was the best conference she ever had.

This is going to be my strategy with teachers I think. Mrs. TF and I are pretty laid back and realistic. Although the boys are only in a day care and not really a full fledged school; their teachers have pulled us to the side and basically thanked us that we're not crazy like some of the other parents.

In reality, they'll spend most of they day with their teachers; so I want to hear the gods honest truth about how they are when they're outside from us.

Teachers are freaking saints, don't know how they do it

 

[Bob Sacamano]

if you don't like the weather in April, it must really suck in July/August.

Not at all. You expect it to be 115 in July/August. As long as you don't hang out in the sun for 4.5 hours in the middle of the day, it's not that bad. And in September/October, 98 feels glorious. It might be my favorite weather here.

But on April 9, when it's been 83 forever, 98 sucks.

But mostly, I was looking for an excuse to call JTG an ###hole.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

Better hydrate, homie

There's water in beer.

Exactly

 

[Idiot Boxer]

if you don't like the weather in April, it must really suck in July/August.

Not at all. You expect it to be 115 in July/August. As long as you don't hang out in the sun for 4.5 hours in the middle of the day, it's not that bad. And in September/October, 98 feels glorious. It might be my favorite weather here.

But on April 9, when it's been 83 forever, 98 sucks.

But mostly, I was looking for an excuse to call JTG an ###hole.

Wait. You're golfing with Tigs?

 

[Bob Sacamano]

if you don't like the weather in April, it must really suck in July/August.

Not at all. You expect it to be 115 in July/August. As long as you don't hang out in the sun for 4.5 hours in the middle of the day, it's not that bad. And in September/October, 98 feels glorious. It might be my favorite weather here.

But on April 9, when it's been 83 forever, 98 sucks.

But mostly, I was looking for an excuse to call JTG an ###hole.

Wait. You're golfing with Tigs?

Going to be ugly imo

 

[T Bell]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

You might be able to purify polluted water, but you can't turn piss into Cabernet. You do what you can with the ones you can. Anybody who asks more from you - even if that somebody is you - is being unrealistic.

My late mother, who was a damn fine teacher*, felt it was realistic to "reach" one kid per year, meaning out of all of her classes. This was out of recognition of how little time you actually have with the kids versus other influences in their lives, especially versus their family lives.

Most parents love their kids but there's a lot of parental incompetence, and you also have to remember that a "bad" parent's close, open-eyed examination of their kid must necessarily lift the lid on the parents' and the family's dysfunction, which most people are terrified to do, much less in the presence of a stranger.

*She loved teaching 7th grade, which as most people will tell you is the toughest grade to teach.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I think I mentioned it before but if you forced me to generalize I would say that Indian (7-11, not casino) parents are the greatest.

I have this exact conversation about 3 or 4 times every year at parent/teacher conferences:

Me: Your son is doing great. He has a 99% in the class and there are no behavioral issues. He's a very positive addition to the class.

Parent: Thank you. That's very good to hear. But you be sure to let me know right away if there is any problem at all.

Me: I will do that.

Parent: No, I mean it. Let me know right away if he gives you any problem at all or if he starts to slack-off. We'll fix that right away.

 

[T Bell]

It's been beautiful here for the better part of 9 months, and I've managed to get onto a golf course exactly once. Today we push 100 for the first time, about 15 degrees above normal temps (#### you, Al Gore), and some ###hole is making me go play golf in it.

###hole>

Yeah, I hate golfing in the sun too

I suck at golf. I golf to drink beer and to enjoy being outside. Being outside when it's 100 and sunny in April is not enjoyable. And it turns out they serve beer in air conditioned buildings.

Thropawishes

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

JFC, that's ridiculous.

Yes, yes it is.

It is messed up on so many levels. Earlier today I was telling the wife "the worst part is that one facet of my job, aside from all of the other obvious things, is to try to make these kids better people. I may only have them 45 minutes a day but I do whatever I can to help them become better people. No just 'more successful' in the traditional sense but just better human beings."

But when you run across parents like this that absolutely have no clue or totally deny that their kid is major dooshspout it's like a kick in the nards.

As cynical and "miserable" as I come across on this board I am an idealist. I wouldn't be in this business if I wasn't. Having this kid go through 95% of the school year with me and then knowing he's leaving without improving one iota in terms of his behavior/attitude/outlook on life bugs the piss out of me.

You might be able to purify polluted water, but you can't turn piss into Cabernet. You do what you can with the ones you can. Anybody who asks more from you - even if that somebody is you - is being unrealistic.

My late mother, who was a damn fine teacher*, felt it was realistic to "reach" one kid per year, meaning out of all of her classes. This was out of recognition of how little time you actually have with the kids versus other influences in their lives, especially versus their family lives.

Most parents love their kids but there's a lot of parental incompetence, and you also have to remember that a "bad" parent's close, open-eyed examination of their kid must necessarily lift the lid on the parents' and the family's dysfunction, which most people are terrified to do, much less in the presence of a stranger.

*She loved teaching 7th grade, which as most people will tell you is the toughest grade to teach.

I think they're all tough. It really depends on your skills and disposition. I have no idea how kiddygarden teachers do it. It even freaks me out a little when I do summer school and I've got 10 year olds. I'm sure other teachers think that we junior high teachers are a little crazy.

 

[T Bell]

I think I mentioned it before but if you forced me to generalize I would say that Indian (7-11, not casino) parents are the greatest.

I have this exact conversation about 3 or 4 times every year at parent/teacher conferences:

Me: Your son is doing great. He has a 99% in the class and there are no behavioral issues. He's a very positive addition to the class.

Parent: Thank you. That's very good to hear. But you be sure to let me know right away if there is any problem at all.

Me: I will do that.

Parent: No, I mean it. Let me know right away if he gives you any problem at all or if he starts to slack-off. We'll fix that right away.

The more I think about it the more I wish you'd have suggested (with a straight face of course) home schooling. That would have been hilarious.

 

[Idiot Boxer]

if you don't like the weather in April, it must really suck in July/August.

Not at all. You expect it to be 115 in July/August. As long as you don't hang out in the sun for 4.5 hours in the middle of the day, it's not that bad. And in September/October, 98 feels glorious. It might be my favorite weather here.

But on April 9, when it's been 83 forever, 98 sucks.

But mostly, I was looking for an excuse to call JTG an ###hole.

Wait. You're golfing with Tigs?

Going to be ugly imo

Jiggly pubs have beer, air conditioning, maybe even a Golden Tee machine. Among other things.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

if you don't like the weather in April, it must really suck in July/August.

Not at all. You expect it to be 115 in July/August. As long as you don't hang out in the sun for 4.5 hours in the middle of the day, it's not that bad. And in September/October, 98 feels glorious. It might be my favorite weather here.

But on April 9, when it's been 83 forever, 98 sucks.

But mostly, I was looking for an excuse to call JTG an ###hole.

Wait. You're golfing with Tigs?

Going to be ugly imo

Jiggly pubs have beer, air conditioning, maybe even a Golden Tee machine. Among other things.

I'm hoping he reads this beforehand so I can fully enjoy his reaction when I take him to an outdoors/open air bar afterwards.

I just can't wait to see how he manages to order a Negroni on the golf course.

 

[YSR]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

 

[YSR]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

tl;dr for everyone: I don't think I've "bonded" with my kid yet and it's kind of bumming me out.

 

[proninja]

I think I mentioned it before but if you forced me to generalize I would say that Indian (7-11, not casino) parents are the greatest.

I have this exact conversation about 3 or 4 times every year at parent/teacher conferences:

Me: Your son is doing great. He has a 99% in the class and there are no behavioral issues. He's a very positive addition to the class.

Parent: Thank you. That's very good to hear. But you be sure to let me know right away if there is any problem at all.

Me: I will do that.

Parent: No, I mean it. Let me know right away if he gives you any problem at all or if he starts to slack-off. We'll fix that right away.

I probably mentioned this the last time you mentioned this, but my wife teaches music and probably 85% of her students are Indian (and about 10% east asian). Lots of tech around here. Their kids are well behaved and actually practice. The white parents don't want to make it a fight and end up not making the kids practice. The Indian parents, well, their kids practice, and they get a lot better, thus enjoying it a lot more.

Indian parents are awesome, except when they're trying to buy something from you. Retail makes you a bit racist.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Spoiler

tl;dr for everyone: I don't think I've "bonded" with my kid yet and it's kind of bumming me out.

I'm pretty sure my wife actually hated our daughter for the first 18-24 mos. Between hormones and constantly having to give attention to something that has completely uprooted a life/lifestyle, routine, and marriage to which you've grown accustomed, I don't think it's an uncommon thing. He's a part-time parent. This thing that didn't even exist a few months ago now monopolizes your time. I didn't get it at all at the time, and it caused LOTS of issues for us. You'll get there eventually. There are lights at the end of the tunnel. She'll develop a personality that you'll completely see that you've helped mold. And that'll be awesome. She'll become less needy over time and start being abl to do some things for herself. And that'll help. And worst case, at the point she gets into school, she'll make friends who will force you to interact with people with whom you currently do not have easy introductions. Even daycares are excellent for that, if you can swing a decent one even a day or two per week.

 

[T Bell]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Some of this is mommy guilt, but some of this is just you. You strike me as someone who's going to enjoy your daughter more as she gets older and can talk and interact with you. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Just understand that with kids, it keeps getting better and better as you watch them and their lives and personalities develop.

 

[T Bell]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Spoiler

tl;dr for everyone: I don't think I've "bonded" with my kid yet and it's kind of bumming me out.

Spoiler

I'm pretty sure my wife actually hated our daughter for the first 18-24 mos. Between hormones and constantly having to give attention to something that has completely uprooted a life/lifestyle, routine, and marriage to which you've grown accustomed, I don't think it's an uncommon thing. He's a part-time parent. This thing that didn't even exist a few months ago now monopolizes your time. I didn't get it at all at the time, and it caused LOTS of issues for us. You'll get there eventually. There are lights at the end of the tunnel. She'll develop a personality that you'll completely see that you've helped mold. And that'll be awesome. She'll become less needy over time and start being abl to do some things for herself. And that'll help. And worst case, at the point she gets into school, she'll make friends who will force you to interact with people with whom you currently do not have easy introductions. Even daycares are excellent for that, if you can swing a decent one even a day or two per week.

 

[Captain Quinoa]

If you run into 10 buttholes during the day: you're the butthole. Wet Dream

Fixt

 

[T Bell]

If you run into 10 buttholes during the day: you're the butthole. Wet Dream

Fixt

You misspelled Clifford.

 

[Captain Quinoa]

Guys, I've got some good news and some bad news.

Good news: My prostate is healthy!

Bad news: I was unexpectedly finger-raped by a 40 year old man today.

Good news: He used a lot of lube.

Bad news: It's all in my underpants now.

Good news: We really bonded, I think he could be the one.

Bad news: He's not returning my texts.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

There is nothing wrong with seeing your kid as special. There is nothing wrong with wanting to defend/protect your kid. There is nothing wrong with being your kid's strongest advocate.

But you have to be realistic. Kids, all kids, can be rapey dickmittens at times. I just love it when I hear parents say stupid crap like "my daughter doesn't lie" or "my child doesn't use that kind of language" or "my child would never do [insert whatever]". Bull####. Some kids are better than others but to pretend that your child is perfect is ridiculous.

 

[YSR]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Spoiler

tl;dr for everyone: I don't think I've "bonded" with my kid yet and it's kind of bumming me out.

I'm pretty sure my wife actually hated our daughter for the first 18-24 mos. Between hormones and constantly having to give attention to something that has completely uprooted a life/lifestyle, routine, and marriage to which you've grown accustomed, I don't think it's an uncommon thing. He's a part-time parent. This thing that didn't even exist a few months ago now monopolizes your time. I didn't get it at all at the time, and it caused LOTS of issues for us. You'll get there eventually. There are lights at the end of the tunnel. She'll develop a personality that you'll completely see that you've helped mold. And that'll be awesome. She'll become less needy over time and start being abl to do some things for herself. And that'll help. And worst case, at the point she gets into school, she'll make friends who will force you to interact with people with whom you currently do not have easy introductions. Even daycares are excellent for that, if you can swing a decent one even a day or two per week.
Thank you. It's supremely helpful to hear I'm not alone in this. I agree with everything you've said for the most part. But, one little note is that Romo stayed home with her while I worked for the first 8.5 months of her life. He misses her terribly when he's on the road and he genuinely believes that every moment with her is valuable. So when I begin to complain about being exhausted at 8:30 PM when she's in bed, I get a "you do realize how lucky you are to be with her all day, right"? I swear it's not emotional warfare - he really feels this way.

And I just don't yet.

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Some of this is mommy guilt, but some of this is just you. You strike me as someone who's going to enjoy your daughter more as she gets older and can talk and interact with you. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Just understand that with kids, it keeps getting better and better as you watch them and their lives and personalities develop.

I think you're right. For instance, I CANNOT WAIT to teach her to read. My siblings taught me when I was really young so I'm counting down the days. But at the same time, I just packed up a bunch of her old clothes and got a little sad about her getting older. Crap, maybe it IS hormones.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

If you run into 10 buttholes during the day: you're the butthole. Wet Dream

Fixt

my link

 

[Tiger Fan]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Probably a natural reaction. You're doing the grunt work for the majority of the day and then when Romo gets home, you probably just want to take a break...whereas he's at "real work" and seeing the kid is something awesome to look forward to.

I know Mrs. TF had planned all along to stay home with the boys; but after 3 weeks decided she wanted to go back to work. She's much better for it. Not saying you're the same way, but maybe there's an absence makes the heart grow fonder thing going on.

Just my $.02, but you need to figure out some sort of "network" for you to latch on to. You need communication with other adults or you're going to go crazy.

 

[Captain Quinoa]

There is nothing wrong with seeing your kid as special. There is nothing wrong with wanting to defend/protect your kid. There is nothing wrong with being your kid's strongest advocate.

But you have to be realistic. Kids, all kids, can be rapey dickmittens at times. I just love it when I hear parents say stupid crap like "my daughter doesn't lie" or "my child doesn't use that kind of language" or "my child would never do [insert whatever]". Bull####. Some kids are better than others but to pretend that your child is perfect is ridiculous.

We've got one of these moms on my son's hockey team. Kid has gotten into it with at least 10 different teammates on and off the ice.. but he's not the problem.

Last night was the final night of tryouts for next season. She found out a bunch of returning players already had been offered spots on the team but not her little angel. She flipped out. Way to live in reality, Toots.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I think I mentioned it before but if you forced me to generalize I would say that Indian (7-11, not casino) parents are the greatest.

I have this exact conversation about 3 or 4 times every year at parent/teacher conferences:

Me: Your son is doing great. He has a 99% in the class and there are no behavioral issues. He's a very positive addition to the class.

Parent: Thank you. That's very good to hear. But you be sure to let me know right away if there is any problem at all.

Me: I will do that.

Parent: No, I mean it. Let me know right away if he gives you any problem at all or if he starts to slack-off. We'll fix that right away.

I'm generally in constant contact with Cal's teachers so I always know what that jerkoff is doing. Of course he's been really good the last 3 months or so which has been nice.

Dylan got into trouble three days in a row about a month ago so the teacher sent a not home and requested I sign it as proof I saw it. Why she doesn't use e-mail, I don't know. So I signed my name and wrote "this will be fixed" on it. I told Dylan if he ever wanted to play Minecraft again, this stopped now. Then I bribed his teacher with 8 dozen glue sticks.

Worked pretty well.

 

[YSR]

BTW, Annyong, I think of you every time I want to scream when my daughter is being difficult. A while back you posted something about how you just have to remind yourself that they are babies and don't know what they're doing. It's pretty common sensual, but it's been really helpful for me to step back and garner the patience I need.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Spoiler

tl;dr for everyone: I don't think I've "bonded" with my kid yet and it's kind of bumming me out.

Spoiler

I'm pretty sure my wife actually hated our daughter for the first 18-24 mos. Between hormones and constantly having to give attention to something that has completely uprooted a life/lifestyle, routine, and marriage to which you've grown accustomed, I don't think it's an uncommon thing. He's a part-time parent. This thing that didn't even exist a few months ago now monopolizes your time. I didn't get it at all at the time, and it caused LOTS of issues for us. You'll get there eventually. There are lights at the end of the tunnel. She'll develop a personality that you'll completely see that you've helped mold. And that'll be awesome. She'll become less needy over time and start being abl to do some things for herself. And that'll help. And worst case, at the point she gets into school, she'll make friends who will force you to interact with people with whom you currently do not have easy introductions. Even daycares are excellent for that, if you can swing a decent one even a day or two per week. Thank you. It's supremely helpful to hear I'm not alone in this. I agree with everything you've said for the most part. But, one little note is that Romo stayed home with her while I worked for the first 8.5 months of her life. He misses her terribly when he's on the road and he genuinely believes that every moment with her is valuable. So when I begin to complain about being exhausted at 8:30 PM when she's in bed, I get a "you do realize how lucky you are to be with her all day, right"? I swear it's not emotional warfare - he really feels this way.

And I just don't yet.

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Some of this is mommy guilt, but some of this is just you. You strike me as someone who's going to enjoy your daughter more as she gets older and can talk and interact with you. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Just understand that with kids, it keeps getting better and better as you watch them and their lives and personalities develop.

I think you're right. For instance, I CANNOT WAIT to teach her to read. My siblings taught me when I was really young so I'm counting down the days. But at the same time, I just packed up a bunch of her old clothes and got a little sad about her getting older. Crap, maybe it IS hormones.

It is. And I'm not being sexist here. Right now your hormones are about as stable as a drunk 5 year old on stilts.

 

[T Bell]

Guys, I've got some good news and some bad news.

Good news: My prostate is healthy!

Bad news: I was unexpectedly finger-raped by a 40 year old man today.

Good news: He used a lot of lube.

Bad news: It's all in my underpants now.

Good news: We really bonded, I think he could be the one.

Bad news: He's not returning my texts.

You don't have to be embarrassed that you liked it.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Spoiler

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Spoiler

tl;dr for everyone: I don't think I've "bonded" with my kid yet and it's kind of bumming me out.

Spoiler

I'm pretty sure my wife actually hated our daughter for the first 18-24 mos. Between hormones and constantly having to give attention to something that has completely uprooted a life/lifestyle, routine, and marriage to which you've grown accustomed, I don't think it's an uncommon thing. He's a part-time parent. This thing that didn't even exist a few months ago now monopolizes your time. I didn't get it at all at the time, and it caused LOTS of issues for us. You'll get there eventually. There are lights at the end of the tunnel. She'll develop a personality that you'll completely see that you've helped mold. And that'll be awesome. She'll become less needy over time and start being abl to do some things for herself. And that'll help. And worst case, at the point she gets into school, she'll make friends who will force you to interact with people with whom you currently do not have easy introductions. Even daycares are excellent for that, if you can swing a decent one even a day or two per week. Thank you. It's supremely helpful to hear I'm not alone in this. I agree with everything you've said for the most part. But, one little note is that Romo stayed home with her while I worked for the first 8.5 months of her life. He misses her terribly when he's on the road and he genuinely believes that every moment with her is valuable. So when I begin to complain about being exhausted at 8:30 PM when she's in bed, I get a "you do realize how lucky you are to be with her all day, right"? I swear it's not emotional warfare - he really feels this way.

And I just don't yet.

I like to think that I'm going to be one of those "is my kid an #######" parents, which I think is great down the line.

Spoiler because I am about to whine/ramble/seek advice so if you don't care about kid stuff please ignore.

Problem is, I'm kind of that parent now. There is a marked difference between the way Romo is with our kid and the way I am. He thinks she is the most amazing thing ever and while I agree that she's awesome and the best thing to happen to us... well, I don't know. When he's gone for work, I'm a single mom 24/7 - we don't have many friends here (mostly my fault because I've been pretty miserable here and haven't wanted to put down roots) and neither of us trust her with his family. But I'm not getting the joy out of it that he seems to when he stays with her.

When he's here, he has an unending amount of patience and desire to engage her (hugs, kisses, baths, feeding, playing, etc.). They are best friends. When I am with her, I play with her and read to her and feed her and bathe her, but I feel like there's a chip or something missing. Some of it has to do with the fact that I'm trying to work enough hours during the week to keep my job in good standing, but still.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble. All of this is to say that down the line, he might not be able to see her faults but I think I will (because maybe I already do?)

Some of this is mommy guilt, but some of this is just you. You strike me as someone who's going to enjoy your daughter more as she gets older and can talk and interact with you. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Just understand that with kids, it keeps getting better and better as you watch them and their lives and personalities develop.

I think you're right. For instance, I CANNOT WAIT to teach her to read. My siblings taught me when I was really young so I'm counting down the days. But at the same time, I just packed up a bunch of her old clothes and got a little sad about her getting older. Crap, maybe it IS hormones.

It's also possible he's just a better person than you.



:ducks:

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

YSR - I'm a dad to be this July and travel a lot for work. Any advice for me to keep the wife happy and maintain the bond with her and baby? I probably won't travel at all for 4-8 weeks but then I will be back to a few days per month.