GM's thread about nothing (23 Viewers)

[-fish-]

I have a date with a masseuse. Is there a protocol on number of dates before I try to get a massage?

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

I have a date with a masseuse. Is there a protocol on number of dates before I try to get a massage?

I think Seinfeld covered this.

 

[bostonfred]

holy crap (probably nsfw)

 

[bentley]

I love my kids but we have some tough days. 97% of my friends are in downtown Austin doing a pub crawl to support cancer research and I'm out here in the hinterlands threatening both boys with a beating if they don't stop arguing about Legos.

 

[Josie Maran]

Heading to bartend a high school graduation party. How many drunk 18 year old girls do you think will be out and about in Youngstown tonight? Keep in mind, it's a Catholic school, so you might want to adjust upward.

Oh and I'm already drunk.

In Youngstown most of 'em are gonna look like enforcers on the field hockey team. If you break through them you're probably in decent shape though.

Nah, that's the big Germans down around Columbus and Cincy. We get a bunch of little guineas and Irish chicks here.

I ran that campus pretty hard in my college days. Amazing what $2 pitchers will do.

YSU? Where'd you go to school?

 

[krista4]

I've been doing a little reconnaissance on possible GMFest attendees and have the following announcements:

proninja will join us at sometime somewhere. He works until 5 on Saturday but could join somewhere thereafter.

As if that weren't enough, the elusive Redmond Longhorn and his ridiculously hot wife are a tentative for the horsies.

 

[UniAlias]

I love my kids but we have some tough days. 97% of my friends are in downtown Austin doing a pub crawl to support cancer research and I'm out here in the hinterlands threatening both boys with a beating if they don't stop arguing about Legos.

Crawl For Cancer.

Did the Austin one a few years ago. The one in Dallas every year is just insane. I believe that's the first time I met GB Disco Stu in person.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Heading to bartend a high school graduation party. How many drunk 18 year old girls do you think will be out and about in Youngstown tonight? Keep in mind, it's a Catholic school, so you might want to adjust upward.

Oh and I'm already drunk.

In Youngstown most of 'em are gonna look like enforcers on the field hockey team. If you break through them you're probably in decent shape though.

Nah, that's the big Germans down around Columbus and Cincy. We get a bunch of little guineas and Irish chicks here.

I ran that campus pretty hard in my college days. Amazing what $2 pitchers will do.

YSU? Where'd you go to school?

2 years Miami University (OH) and 3 years at Wright State.

 

[kevzilla]

I love my kids but we have some tough days. 97% of my friends are in downtown Austin doing a pub crawl to support cancer research and I'm out here in the hinterlands threatening both boys with a beating if they don't stop arguing about Legos.

Legos is serious business. So is getting beaten, of course.

 

[trogg78]

Heading to bartend a high school graduation party. How many drunk 18 year old girls do you think will be out and about in Youngstown tonight? Keep in mind, it's a Catholic school, so you might want to adjust upward.

Oh and I'm already drunk.

I hope someone checked Wikipedia for the population of Youngstown.

 

[trogg78]

I love my kids but we have some tough days. 97% of my friends are in downtown Austin doing a pub crawl to support cancer research and I'm out here in the hinterlands threatening both boys with a beating if they don't stop arguing about Legos.

Throw the Legos out the window and tell them they're next.

 

[Frostillicus]

I went to my local liquor store tonight and grabbed a 750 of Knob Creek and the guy was like do you want the big one and I said no I'm good with this one and he said what about for the same price so I was like yeah. He said he doesn't carry the liter but the knob creek distributor gave him a couple and he'd swap for me at the same price because I'm a good customer. That's 33% more bourbon.

 

[YSR]

I went to my local liquor store tonight and grabbed a 750 of Knob Creek and the guy was like do you want the big one and I said no I'm good with this one and he said what about for the same price so I was like yeah. He said he doesn't carry the liter but the knob creek distributor gave him a couple and he'd swap for me at the same price because I'm a good customer. That's 33% more bourbon.

Your kid texted me a couple of nights ago.

 

[Abraham]

You realize the freebies don't count on inventory so he pocketed the $. You got a nice deal, but let's not act like the clerk didn't benefit too.

 

[Frostillicus]

I went to my local liquor store tonight and grabbed a 750 of Knob Creek and the guy was like do you want the big one and I said no I'm good with this one and he said what about for the same price so I was like yeah. He said he doesn't carry the liter but the knob creek distributor gave him a couple and he'd swap for me at the same price because I'm a good customer. That's 33% more bourbon.

Your kid texted me a couple of nights ago.

Which one?

 

[Frostillicus]

You realize the freebies don't count on inventory so he pocketed the $. You got a nice deal, but let's not act like the clerk didn't benefit too.

link

 

[Abraham]

You're up in chess.

 

[krista4]

Could someone explain to me how, if Mr. krista is going to the store and asks if we need anything (because I am the only one in the house who could possibly notice if, for instance, we are nearly out of toilet paper or trash bags or whatever), no matter how many items are on the list I give him, he comes back with N-1 items? If it's only two or three items, this still holds true. If I actually write down the list for him, this still holds true. TIA.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Could someone explain to me how, if Mr. krista is going to the store and asks if we need anything (because I am the only one in the house who could possibly notice if, for instance, we are nearly out of toilet paper or trash bags or whatever), no matter how many items are on the list I give him, he comes back with N-1 items? If it's only two or three items, this still holds true. If I actually write down the list for him, this still holds true. TIA.

Get the anylist app for your phones. You can have collaborative lists so you should be able to double check it before he heads home (or even follow in real time)

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Heading to bartend a high school graduation party. How many drunk 18 year old girls do you think will be out and about in Youngstown tonight? Keep in mind, it's a Catholic school, so you might want to adjust upward.

Oh and I'm already drunk.

Wherever you find four Catholics, you'll find a fifth.

 

[krista4]

Could someone explain to me how, if Mr. krista is going to the store and asks if we need anything (because I am the only one in the house who could possibly notice if, for instance, we are nearly out of toilet paper or trash bags or whatever), no matter how many items are on the list I give him, he comes back with N-1 items? If it's only two or three items, this still holds true. If I actually write down the list for him, this still holds true. TIA.

Get the anylist app for your phones. You can have collaborative lists so you should be able to double check it before he heads home (or even follow in real time)

You'd think it would be this easy. But no. I've given paper lists, texted lists, typed the list myself into his phone, etc. This does not work. Even if I could check in real time, he never answers his phone so there's no way to call and say paaaaaaper tooooooowels.

 

[Josie Maran]

Heading to bartend a high school graduation party. How many drunk 18 year old girls do you think will be out and about in Youngstown tonight? Keep in mind, it's a Catholic school, so you might want to adjust upward.

Oh and I'm already drunk.

Wherever you find four Catholics, you'll find a fifth.

The kid I'm working with (its his cousin's party) is absolutely shmammered. I am holding steady at "Moderately Impaired."

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

You realize the freebies don't count on inventory so he pocketed the $. You got a nice deal, but let's not act like the clerk didn't benefit too.

link

Anemone occultYusef ratchet yolo quoit of positive volvo for the guy

 

[mr. furley]

I'm watching the Lego movie

Is everything awesome?

Well , everything except the movie.

false

 

[mr. furley]

Ray "Total Gaybait" Nitschke

first the shot at Fonzie and now this???? i'll be in Bako by sundown to stab you in the liver, you farging saminabatch

 

[5-ish Finkle]

Could someone explain to me how, if Mr. krista is going to the store and asks if we need anything (because I am the only one in the house who could possibly notice if, for instance, we are nearly out of toilet paper or trash bags or whatever), no matter how many items are on the list I give him, he comes back with N-1 items? If it's only two or three items, this still holds true. If I actually write down the list for him, this still holds true. TIA.

He really wants you to go be the one going to the store.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Ray "Total Gaybait" Nitschke

first the shot at Fonzie and now this???? i'll be in Bako by sundown to stab you in the liver, you farging saminabatch

Honest to Ditka...I have recollection of posting that.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Could someone explain to me how, if Mr. krista is going to the store and asks if we need anything (because I am the only one in the house who could possibly notice if, for instance, we are nearly out of toilet paper or trash bags or whatever), no matter how many items are on the list I give him, he comes back with N-1 items? If it's only two or three items, this still holds true. If I actually write down the list for him, this still holds true. TIA.

He really wants you to go be the one going to the store.

Going grocery shopping is a great way to escape the wife and kids for a few

 

[proninja]

I have a date with a masseuse. Is there a protocol on number of dates before I try to get a massage?

I dated a masseuse. Guys asking for a massage was her #1 pet peeve.

The good news is after a couple dates she was so pleased I didn't ask that she brought it up and offered.

 

[mr. furley]

We aren't going to try "I don't like willie Nelson" shtick in here. Let's move along.

It's all in good fun. No one believes there are human beings who don't like the Red Headed Stranger.

can't say i know one song by the guy

 

[mr. furley]

Ray "Total Gaybait" Nitschke

first the shot at Fonzie and now this???? i'll be in Bako by sundown to stab you in the liver, you farging saminabatch

Honest to Ditka...I have recollection of posting that.

good answer

 

[krista4]

Could someone explain to me how, if Mr. krista is going to the store and asks if we need anything (because I am the only one in the house who could possibly notice if, for instance, we are nearly out of toilet paper or trash bags or whatever), no matter how many items are on the list I give him, he comes back with N-1 items? If it's only two or three items, this still holds true. If I actually write down the list for him, this still holds true. TIA.

He really wants you to go be the one going to the store.

Going grocery shopping is a great way to escape the wife and kids for a few

Yeah, in most circumstances I'd think 5-ish is right, but Mr. krista knows I can't shop. I'm terrible at it and get panicked. I'm not allowed near groceries nor near Target.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Ray "Total Gaybait" Nitschke

first the shot at Fonzie and now this???? i'll be in Bako by sundown to stab you in the liver, you farging saminabatch

Honest to Ditka...I have recollection of posting that.

good answer

It was uncalled for. Nitschke was badass...for a Packer.

 

[Osaurus]

Tender Mercies is kind of a depressing movie.

 

[krista4]

Tender Mercies is kind of a depressing movie.

Love that movie. Love Robert Duvall always.

 

[Annyong]

Took the little family to the local Mexican restaurant (La Mex, hi LD) and it went better than anticipated. A couple of margaritas and $12 of chicken on the floor and I made it home without making a scene.

 

[Osaurus]

Tender Mercies is kind of a depressing movie.

Love that movie. Love Robert Duvall always.

Very good acting. Great sense of desolation in the first half of the movie IMO

 

[krista4]

Tender Mercies is kind of a depressing movie.

Love that movie. Love Robert Duvall always.

Very good acting. Great sense of desolation in the first half of the movie IMO

Great description--sense of desolation is a perfect way to put it. It's a perfect little movie IMO.

 

[shuke]

Neighbors had a party tonight, all the kids decided they wanted to see the movie in the park in our subdivision. So now all the dads are just sitting here drinking unable to talk.

 

[Abraham]

You're up in chess

 

[YSR]

I went to my local liquor store tonight and grabbed a 750 of Knob Creek and the guy was like do you want the big one and I said no I'm good with this one and he said what about for the same price so I was like yeah. He said he doesn't carry the liter but the knob creek distributor gave him a couple and he'd swap for me at the same price because I'm a good customer. That's 33% more bourbon.

Your kid texted me a couple of nights ago.

Which one?

Whichever one had "Fjffgybjkkigvwxguvynfdrjg" to say to me.

 

[bentley]

Neighbors had a party tonight, all the kids decided they wanted to see the movie in the park in our subdivision. So now all the dads are just sitting here drinking unable to talk.

At least you were still able to post here about it. Dynamite drop-in.

 

[mr. furley]

Malloy> http://i.imgur.com/vykS6WW.jpg

 

[bentley]

I love my kids but we have some tough days. 97% of my friends are in downtown Austin doing a pub crawl to support cancer research and I'm out here in the hinterlands threatening both boys with a beating if they don't stop arguing about Legos.

Throw the Legos out the window and tell them they're next.

JR had a long day. He was grounded from every screen (and Minecraft) by 8 am and had a bowl of strawberries dumped down the garbage disposal because he was arguing with me about something just before lunch.

 

[Frostillicus]

I went to my local liquor store tonight and grabbed a 750 of Knob Creek and the guy was like do you want the big one and I said no I'm good with this one and he said what about for the same price so I was like yeah. He said he doesn't carry the liter but the knob creek distributor gave him a couple and he'd swap for me at the same price because I'm a good customer. That's 33% more bourbon.

Your kid texted me a couple of nights ago.

Which one?

Whichever one had "Fjffgybjkkigvwxguvynfdrjg" to say to me.

Sounds like both. They're always saying that.

Actually that has to be Ben, who if I recall always liked to call you too. Abby's text would have been "abby daddy mommy hi abby mommy daddy ben."

Maybe Ben has a crush.

 

[Otis]

BIL visiting with his GF. They're staying over. We got lit tonight. God she's so so hot.

 

[Abraham]

Well, you should #### her. Don't see how it could go wrong.

 

[Otis]

Well, you should #### her. Don't see how it could go wrong.

Right?? I wish she wouldn't wear the outfits she wears. Makes it really hard not to stare.

 

[bentley]

Well, you should #### her. Don't see how it could go wrong.

 

[Abraham]

How was the house hunting? You moving to my hood soon?