Heather, of "Heather has two mommies" comes out against Gay Ma (1 Viewer)

[Joe Summer]

She had a "deep-down unquenchable ache for" the parent who rejected her, not because he was a man.

She had two parents. She longed for a daddy. Unless you have a daughter, you have no idea. Its different. Every father of a daughter I know knows it. I'm a man, so I don't know what its like from the daughter's perspective, but its not the same as with a mother. Genders are different in both physiology and psychology. To insist that it doesn't matter is head in the sand thinking.

Please explain how a gay marriage ban would have prevented this girl from longing for her dad.

 

[Tennessee_ATO]

She had a "deep-down unquenchable ache for" the parent who rejected her, not because he was a man.

She had two parents. She longed for a daddy. Unless you have a daughter, you have no idea. Its different. Every father of a daughter I know knows it. I'm a man, so I don't know what its like from the daughter's perspective, but its not the same as with a mother. Genders are different in both physiology and psychology. To insist that it doesn't matter is head in the sand thinking.

Please explain how a gay marriage ban would have prevented this girl from longing for her dad.

Exactly. The fact that her mom married her step-mom is irrelevant to her problem. Had her mom just co-habitated with her step-mom instead, the result is the same. Had she simply chosen to never engage in a heterosexual relationship ever again in her life, the result is the same.

FWIW, I think it's a valid complaint for a heterosexual child of a gay marriage to raise -- she did not have the opportunity to watch how a heterosexual man and woman interact in a marriage setting. There is no doubt that my kids watch my interaction with my wife (and vice versa) for cues and examples of how to treat members of the opposite sex in a relationship. If either of my kids were deprived of that, it would necessarily make it more difficult for them as they become adults. That's what happens to children of divorce whose custodial parents don't remarry or children who lose a parent and the surviving parent doesn't remarry.

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

It's just something that parents need to understand and try to address in raising their kids. Gay marriage is just a red herring in all of this. It's an issue that needs to be kept in mind for gay parenting.

 

[Fennis]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

 

[Jayrod]

She had a "deep-down unquenchable ache for" the parent who rejected her, not because he was a man.

She had two parents. She longed for a daddy. Unless you have a daughter, you have no idea. Its different. Every father of a daughter I know knows it. I'm a man, so I don't know what its like from the daughter's perspective, but its not the same as with a mother. Genders are different in both physiology and psychology. To insist that it doesn't matter is head in the sand thinking.

Please explain how a gay marriage ban would have prevented this girl from longing for her dad.

I can't and that is an unrelated issue. I was talking about her actually longing for a man which was in response to cstu.

But hey, you keep knocking down those strawmen.

 

[Tennessee_ATO]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

So hetero kids can learn about relationships from gay parents? Or is that just a one-way street?Edit: Fixed the obvious error.

 

[Fennis]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

So gay kids can learn about relationships from gay parents? Or is that just a one-way street?

Any kid, regardless of orientation, can learn from any parent, regardless of orientation, how to have a relationship.

 

[Tennessee_ATO]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

So gay kids can learn about relationships from gay parents? Or is that just a one-way street?

Any kid, regardless of orientation, can learn from any parent, regardless of orientation, how to have a relationship.

I don't profess to know the ins and outs of gay courtship, but I'm assuming there is a different dynamic than heterosexual courtship. I can talk to my son about how to ask a girl out, what to do on a date, etc. I don't know what "protocol" would be for him to have a date w/ a guy. I could "educate" myself -- but that's a poor substitute for actual knowledge.

I get that you treat your date/girlfriend/spouse with respect and dignity regardless of sexual orientation. But I try to treat everyone I encounter that way. I'm only romantically involved with 1 of them though. I had to court her following the norms and mores applicable to a heterosexual relationship. I'm guessing those norms and mores are different for a homosexual relationship.

 

[jonessed]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

So gay kids can learn about relationships from gay parents? Or is that just a one-way street?

Any kid, regardless of orientation, can learn from any parent, regardless of orientation, how to have a relationship.

Assuming the child isn't gay it would be more helpful to learn how to emulate a healthy heterosexual relationship.

If the child was gay then it would be more useful to emulate a homosexual relationship (given the same sex).

Either of these would be preferable to learning how to emulate a bad relationship.

Right?

 

[Fennis]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

So gay kids can learn about relationships from gay parents? Or is that just a one-way street?

Any kid, regardless of orientation, can learn from any parent, regardless of orientation, how to have a relationship.

Assuming the child isn't gay it would be more helpful to learn how to emulate a healthy heterosexual relationship.

If the child was gay then it would be more useful to emulate a homosexual relationship (given the same sex).

Either of these would be preferable to learning how to emulate a bad relationship.

Right?

No, I don't believe that is the case. I think more importantly is the values a parent wants to instill in their children. And even that isn't perfect, we have all seen good parents end up with horrible children or bad parents who end up with good children.

 

[Grace Under Pressure]

Heather, of "Heather has two mommies", is damn cute.

 

[cstu]

Assuming the child isn't gay it would be more helpful to learn how to emulate a healthy heterosexual relationship.

If the child was gay then it would be more useful to emulate a homosexual relationship (given the same sex).

Either of these would be preferable to learning how to emulate a bad relationship.

Right?

Why do you assume there's a huge difference healthy homo/hetero relationships?

 

[cstu]

I don't profess to know the ins and outs of gay courtship, but I'm assuming there is a different dynamic than heterosexual courtship. I can talk to my son about how to ask a girl out, what to do on a date, etc. I don't know what "protocol" would be for him to have a date w/ a guy. I could "educate" myself -- but that's a poor substitute for actual knowledge.I get that you treat your date/girlfriend/spouse with respect and dignity regardless of sexual orientation. But I try to treat everyone I encounter that way. I'm only romantically involved with 1 of them though. I had to court her following the norms and mores applicable to a heterosexual relationship. I'm guessing those norms and mores are different for a homosexual relationship.

Somewhere in between the advice I'd give my straight son or straight daughter.

 

[dhockster]

Assuming the child isn't gay it would be more helpful to learn how to emulate a healthy heterosexual relationship.

If the child was gay then it would be more useful to emulate a homosexual relationship (given the same sex).

Either of these would be preferable to learning how to emulate a bad relationship.

Right?

Why do you assume there's a huge difference healthy homo/hetero relationships?

Because Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus. Besides the differences in personalities that can cause stress in a relationship, gender differences also create stress within a relationship. Hetero relationships have to learn to deal with the stress caused by gender differences. Homo relationships don't have to deal with gender differences. I think it would be useful for a hetero child to learn that it requires significant work in a hetero relationship to overcome the stress caused by gender differences. They may not get that lesson in a same sex household (especially if they are the same sex as the same sex parents)

 

[jonessed]

Assuming the child isn't gay it would be more helpful to learn how to emulate a healthy heterosexual relationship.

If the child was gay then it would be more useful to emulate a homosexual relationship (given the same sex).

Either of these would be preferable to learning how to emulate a bad relationship.

Right?

Why do you assume there's a huge difference healthy homo/hetero relationships?

Male and female role tendencies in relationships differ whether gay or straight. It impacts homosexual relationships as well (the differences between two male partners and two female partners).This is pretty well known. Are you disagreeing that there are differences or are you saying that it doesn't matter?

 

[Joe Summer]

Slightly off topic, but the search function sucks, so...

Adopted son of gay parents attempts to testify before Florida legislature

 

[Clifford]

I think a big part of her situation is born out of the insistence by these women that none of them needs a man. And it is damaging trying to tell a child that they can do without the opposite gender. Half of the world's population is the opposite gender. The vast majority of the population seeks romance with the opposite gender. Teaching a child those things is self-serving and not in the best interest of the child.

Plus that flannel and jeans shorts are acceptable clothing.

 

[Clifford]

It's also a problem for homosexual kids who don't have the opportunity to see how homosexual couples interact. If one of my kids is homosexual, he or she is not going to get much help watching my wife and me interact because it will be alien to them, just as a homosexual relationship will be alien to a kid who is heterosexual. (And note, I'm not intending any type of slur by using the term "alien".)

you really think your gay kids cant learn from how to have an relationship based on the relationships you have?

So gay kids can learn about relationships from gay parents? Or is that just a one-way street?

Any kid, regardless of orientation, can learn from any parent, regardless of orientation, how to have a relationship.

I don't profess to know the ins and outs of gay courtship, but I'm assuming there is a different dynamic than heterosexual courtship. I can talk to my son about how to ask a girl out, what to do on a date, etc. I don't know what "protocol" would be for him to have a date w/ a guy. I could "educate" myself -- but that's a poor substitute for actual knowledge.

You owe it to your gay kid to spend some time in a bath house