how much would somebody have to pay you to eat a turd? (1 Viewer)

[Scoresman]

Okay lets assume there's this sick trillionaire with access to lots of money. but you dont wanna be greedy. cause see this dude is like "i want to see you eat a turd...and we can negotiate the price" but if you ask for too much he won't do it. you gotta go with your baseline price. also this is not my sick fetish.

so how much would you be paid to like eat a glistening creviced turd from a big nasty ######. slipping and sliding in the most poetic usage of "log flume" to date. i really think i could eat a big nasty turd for approximately 10,000 dollars. But if I was really hurting for money it might be less.

 

[Annyong]

tl:dr

10k

 

[Dan Lambskin]

No pole?

 

[Scoresman]

No pole?

Nope. you have to come up with a minimum number

 

[Rayderr]

Critical Bill: "This one scale offered me five centuries to do it."
Jimmy the Saint: "To do what Bill?"
Critical Bill: "Eat it, man! Not a lot, just a little piece. I'm sayin', Easy Wind is a lyin' moon cricket. But maybe on this one, he wasn't really lyin', 'cause I did it. For a small nickel. See, see, he leaves that part out. Five yards man. And it was only a little bitty piece of ####. I mean, it didn't really have no taste, either. Spongy."

 

[Dan Lambskin]

No pole?

Nope. you have to come up with a minimum number

$100K

 

[Binky The Doormat]

$1million+ or its not happening

 

[Keith R]

My own - $3 mil

Anyone else's - no go

 

[boots11234]

What kind of mind is required to even think up this question?

 

[Dinsy Ejotuz]

Couldn't do it for all the billions in the world.

 

[KarmaPolice]

for $10M I would consider eating it as it came out.

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

Is it my turd? Can I freeze it beforehand? Can I add flavor? Can I eat lots of corn beforehand and customize my turd?

Do you have to keep it down?

 

[KCitons]

Will I be eating it off my own chest, or someone else's chest?

 

[jomar]

How big of a turd are we talking?

 

[mad sweeney]

A horse or other grass eating turd, maybe as low as $500K. As described, a million per bite.

 

[fantasycurse42]

Gotta be better than Five Guys... I'm in.

 

[ummich10]

Is it my turd? Can I freeze it beforehand? Can I add flavor? Can I eat lots of corn beforehand and customize my turd?

Offshoot of the burger thread: you're only allowed one turd topping, what would it be?

 

[Fennis]

Okay lets assume there's this sick trillionaire with access to lots of money. but you dont wanna be greedy. cause see this dude is like "i want to see you eat a turd...and we can negotiate the price" but if you ask for too much he won't do it. you gotta go with your baseline price. also this is not my sick fetish.

so how much would you be paid to like eat a glistening creviced turd from a big nasty ######. slipping and sliding in the most poetic usage of "log flume" to date. i really think i could eat a big nasty turd for approximately 10,000 dollars. But if I was really hurting for money it might be less.

I think we have a deal. I am ready to take a ####, paypal me the $10K

 

[matuski]

Sounds a lot like Animal Style to me.

 

[Tick]

A horse or other grass eating turd, maybe as low as $500K. As described, a million per bite.

Moose for $100. It's sawdust.

 

[matuski]

What condiment would you put on a turd?

 

[Soulfly3]

this thread is giving me a boner.

Id do it for half value if they promised to piss on me during my meal

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

I think I'm in at $50k

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

Is it my turd? Can I freeze it beforehand? Can I add flavor? Can I eat lots of corn beforehand and customize my turd?

Offshoot of the burger thread: you're only allowed one turd topping, what would it be?

One gallon of V8

 

[Binky The Doormat]

this thread is giving me a boner.

Id do it for half value if they promised to piss on me during my meal

Would you have to wear anything special?

 

[Todd Andrews]

$87

 

[Politician Spock]

Gotta be better than Five Guys... I'm in.

TURD IN THE DOOR!!!

 

[Scoresman]

Is it my turd? Can I freeze it beforehand? Can I add flavor? Can I eat lots of corn beforehand and customize my turd?

If you want it to be. no freezing. no additional flavor. you may eat what you want beforehand.

What kind of mind is required to even think up this question?

Mine.

Is it my turd? Can I freeze it beforehand? Can I add flavor? Can I eat lots of corn beforehand and customize my turd?

Do you have to keep it down?

No, but the whole turd must be ingested.

 

[Widbil83]

$1k

 

[rockaction]

Can we puke repeatedly?

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

Will it be sprinkled with Jimmies?

How many ounces will I need to consume?

Do a get a taste beverage handy to wash it down?

Can I just eat the peanuts? Hell, I've heard plenty here offer to eat the peanuts out of various chicks stools just to get close to them. Maybe they are experienced.I like to learn from th experiences of others and they seem to think it well worth it.

 

[Otis]

Lol at 10k. Jesus.

Would have to be 1M and if I were sitting there looking at it considering this seriously, I suspect higher.

 

[parasaurolophus]

$1k

This would be my answer too, with one caveat... Nobody would be able to know I did it. 1k isnt worth everybody referring to you for the rest of your life as the dude that ate a turd. If it was to be public knowledge, it would have to be a sum of money that would really alter my life.

 

[KCitons]

$1k

This would be my answer too, with one caveat... Nobody would be able to know I did it. 1k isnt worth everybody referring to you for the rest of your life as the dude that ate a turd. If it was to be public knowledge, it would have to be a sum of money that would really alter my life.

Wha? Isn't being the guy that ate a turd, life altering enough?

 

[DrJ]

Being known as a guy willing to eat turds for cash seems like it might have some career potential.

 

[DrJ]

Especially if you're willing to do this for as little as 1K. Guys like scoresman might hire you out for parties at that rate, and if you can eat an acceptable amount of poop to satisfy them in say 5-10 minutes that's a pretty good hourly wage.

 

[Raider Nation]

So we can't freeze the turd.

Can we let it petrify for a month at room temp, or does it have to be a fresh steamer straight from the starfish?

 

[DrJ]

So we can't freeze the turd.

Can we let it petrify for a month at room temp, or does it have to be a fresh steamer straight from the starfish?

What benefit are you seeing here?

 

[parasaurolophus]

$1k

This would be my answer too, with one caveat... Nobody would be able to know I did it. 1k isnt worth everybody referring to you for the rest of your life as the dude that ate a turd. If it was to be public knowledge, it would have to be a sum of money that would really alter my life.

Wha? Isn't being the guy that ate a turd, life altering enough?

I'm a FBG. Would rather eat a turd than olive garden.

 

[attaché case]

Side shoot: what if it was Kate Upton's turd?

Otis' price just went to 10 million.

 

[jon_mx]

This would have to be a life altering amount. Anyone doing this for under $100k is nuts. It would have to be 7 figures before I would even entertain doing it.

 

[jon_mx]

So we can't freeze the turd.

Can we let it petrify for a month at room temp, or does it have to be a fresh steamer straight from the starfish?

Fresh out if the oven.

 

[Otis]

Side shoot: what if it was Kate Upton's turd?

Otis' price just went to 10 million.

That's likely a massive turd.

 

[xulf]

Just took a dump. No way I could actually eat this thing.

 

[Patriotsfatboy1]

Why would they have to pay me if they want to eat a turd? Have at it free of charge.

 

[Parrothead]

disgusting :X

 

[Guest]

I would do many things for a surprisingly low amount of money. This is not one of them.

 

[AAABatteries]

100k for my own

250k for a disease free turd (not my own)

100M for a random turd that hasn't been appraised

 

[gianmarco]

Another guy and a cup is all I'd need.

 

[Timmay]

How big is the turd? Solid or soft? Is this sitting a couple days after initial dumping or straight from the butt? Flavoring added or as is? After eating corn or no? A lot of questions need to be answered.