I did want to share this little nugget from the conversation with my stepmother.
After we talked about the major issue, she said she was surprised, had no idea I felt this way, etc. And then she went into defense mode to try and explain their behavior. And the first line of defense was to essentially blame my daughter from when she was a 6-month old infant. Stepmom said [paraphrasing] “Do you remember when we first came down to meet her, and you said that you cannot hold her because she will freak out?”
My dad and stepmom did not come down to see their granddaughter until she was around 6 months old. Now by that time, she had some personality, and she was able to recognize people, and feel safe with those she knew. And she would be afraid of strangers. As any ####### infant baby would!! But for some reason, my stepmom thought this is a legitimate reason for not being more of a presence in our lives. As if to say that they didn’t want to be a presence because my 6-month old daughter didn’t like them. It was so weird. I had to call bull#### on that, and after thinking more about it later, it was just such a weird exchange. I still can’t make any sense of it.
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