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Important breakfast sandwich question (1 Viewer)

Do you

  • Eat it however you picked it up

    Votes: 24 16.2%
  • Eat the extra meaty side first

    Votes: 36 24.3%
  • Eat the no meat side first

    Votes: 8 5.4%
  • Stop and fix the meat first so the bacon is evenly distributed

    Votes: 78 52.7%
  • Other (please specify)

    Votes: 2 1.4%

  • Total voters
    148

bostonfred

Footballguy
You get a breakfast sandwich. We'll call it bacon egg and cheese on a bagel, but if you like sausage or if your wife makes you get turkey bacon that's fine, and if you like English muffins or fancy rolls that's fine too. The important thing is it's a sandwich and the meat is not centered.  It's hanging off to one side, so there will be a couple bites with extra meat and a couple with no meat. 

Picture for reference

So what do you do?

 
Attempt to redistribute as best I can.  After that if it's still off I'd go with no meat side first (assuming bacon), however, I've noticed with sausage sometimes the meat will slide away from you as you eat, so I'd probably go meat side first there hoping that at the end the meat is evenly distributed into the previously meat free zone

 
Go for the kill, eat that bacon and cheese gooey goodness and remember how good it was when you're onto the all bun section. 

 
I consider myself an expert because this actually happened to me. 

Start with the no meat side.  Because going from no sandwich to meatless sandwich is still a mouth upgrade.

Then the next bite gets even better.  Your mouth is like holy #### is that bacon?  

And the anticipation builds.  

Then your last bite is like the sandwich you wish you'd been eating the whole time, all bacon and a little bit of egg.  And that's the bite that lingers in your mouth until you have a sip of coffee, so maybe you wait a little and just appreciate the bacony afterglow.

All you rearrangers are ruining the experience for yourselves.  

 
Go back into the place and throw the sandwich at them and scream "You expect me to eat this ####???? You vile mother####er!!!"

 
Attempt to redistribute as best I can.  After that if it's still off I'd go with no meat side first (assuming bacon), however, I've noticed with sausage sometimes the meat will slide away from you as you eat, so I'd probably go meat side first there hoping that at the end the meat is evenly distributed into the previously meat free zone
This is excellent analysis and I'm guessing from a fatty.  Nice work.

 
Rearrange for sure. If I wanted just a bacon and cheese i would have ordered it. If I had wanted just an egg and cheese, that's what I ordered. 

What I ordered was a bacon, egg, and cheese. I want all 3 in every bite. I want the crunch and saltiness of the bacon mixed with the silky smooth umami of the egg and the gooey richness of the cheese. The combination of those textures and flavors is what makes the sandwich and I want it in every bite.

 
Gotta melt the cheese over the bacon to help hold it in place and then get a nice firm grip that smashes everything a bit and holds it all together.
Is your cheese made of gorilla glue?  It would take significant adhesive power to counteract the effect of bite drag. I can demonstrate this mathematically. 

 
Is your cheese made of gorilla glue?  It would take significant adhesive power to counteract the effect of bite drag. I can demonstrate this mathematically. 
This is a good point - you have to put a little extra oomph in your bite in this situation and make sure you get all the way through to prevent said drag.

 
You get a breakfast sandwich. We'll call it bacon egg and cheese on a bagel, but if you like sausage or if your wife makes you get turkey bacon that's fine, and if you like English muffins or fancy rolls that's fine too. The important thing is it's a sandwich and the meat is not centered.  It's hanging off to one side, so there will be a couple bites with extra meat and a couple with no meat. 

Picture for reference

So what do you do?
I would sue.

 
Meat side first. I'm so afraid of losing any meat, and the easiest way to lose it is to bite from the other side and let the meat slip out. The meat has already proven it can move in the sandwich. The only way it's moving now is into my mouth.

 
Meat side first. I'm so afraid of losing any meat, and the easiest way to lose it is to bite from the other side and let the meat slip out. The meat has already proven it can move in the sandwich. The only way it's moving now is into my mouth.
There's nothing like meat moving in to your mouth.

-WD

 
The first few bites of anything are the best ones - you're wrong here.
Exactly why I voted for the eat the extra meat side first. 

Oh and the pic shows bacon on the other side of the sandwhich so you're not going to be deprived of bacon.

 
Option #1 - I'm going to eat it however I pick it up. I don't want to get bogged down with trying to alter the natural state of things as presented to me by the Breakfast Sandwich Gods. Its all going to the same place in the end, so I want to let the experience take me where it will and just enjoy the ride.

 
Option #1 - I'm going to eat it however I pick it up. I don't want to get bogged down with trying to alter the natural state of things as presented to me by the Breakfast Sandwich Gods. Its all going to the same place in the end, so I want to let the experience take me where it will and just enjoy the ride.
Very Buddhist of you. Except for the eating a slaughtered pig part. 

 
Rearrange for sure. If I wanted just a bacon and cheese i would have ordered it. If I had wanted just an egg and cheese, that's what I ordered. 

What I ordered was a bacon, egg, and cheese. I want all 3 in every bite. I want the crunch and saltiness of the bacon mixed with the silky smooth umami of the egg and the gooey richness of the cheese. The combination of those textures and flavors is what makes the sandwich and I want it in every bite.
I have nothing to add. 

/thread

 
Surprised none of the new yorkers have chimed in about how New York Bodegas have the best breakfast sandwiches 
Bodegas are disgusting.  I've never understood having unmonitored open air buffet style food in the middle of all that polluted air, cockroaches and  overpopulation.  It's beyond filthy.  

 
I unconsciously center the meat during my first bite. You hold the sandwich loosely and the second before you bite your tongue nudges the meat toward the center. It just happens without thinking about it. If something goes wrong I'll take a second quick bite of the non-meat part to even out the meat to sandwich overload in my mouth. That also happens unconsciously. Just don't overthink it. The male brain is equipped to handle these situations.

 
Voted other - Order scrapple, egg and cheese instead. That way, the scrapple covers the entire sandwich.

 
bostonfred said:
Bodegas are disgusting.  I've never understood having unmonitored open air buffet style food in the middle of all that polluted air, cockroaches and  overpopulation.  It's beyond filthy.  
And delicious.

 
fatguyinalittlecoat said:
You redistributors should probably just put the whole thing in a blender and drink it like a smoothie.
If your pizza toppings slide or shift do you just eat sauce/crust?

 
The picture is making me stabby.

not becuase the contents are distributed wrong, but because of the bread. Anyone that serves me a breakfast sandwich on a kaiser is getting a throat punch.

am I wrong here?

 
The picture is making me stabby.

not becuase the contents are distributed wrong, but because of the bread. Anyone that serves me a breakfast sandwich on a kaiser is getting a throat punch.

am I wrong here?
Very wrong. It should be served on a Kaiser unless you request a bagel or otherwise.

 
Very wrong. It should be served on a Kaiser unless you request a bagel or otherwise.
There's about 14 different makes of bread that come before a kaiser when it comes to what's right for a breakfast sandwich. There's a chance that even pllain white toast is better 

 
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There's about 14 different makes of bread that come before a kaiser when it comes to what's right for a breakfast sandwich. There's a chance that even pllain white toast is better 
Can you list the 14 so I can compare?

 
Last edited by a moderator:

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