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Little brother addicted to pillsUPDATE Needles now :( (1 Viewer)

STEADYMOBBIN 22

Footballguy
My younger brother has been using pills for a little while now (3 years) and I knew about it and had some talks with him but had no idea it was (or wasn't) this bad. I was no saint growing up so while I have busted his balls, I laid back hoping he would eventually grow out of it like I did. Well I received this little gem on from a complete stranger on FB:

WARNING about MOOBINS LITTLE BROTHER, He is addicted to heroin and if your part of his family than you might want to get him into a rehab. But he will need more than a 30 day program. If youre a friend of his than be careful of lending him money. All he is going to do is shoot it up and you may not see your money come back to you. He will start out asking for a little at first and pay that back, but he will build up your trust and ask for more till he wont be able to pay you. I know he has done this with several other people. So the best thing to help him is to not feed his habit. He had a friend named BILL who died from an over dose about 6months ago. He has another friend who has try to get him to go to a methadone clinic but he wont go there either. So if any of you care about him your try to get him so help.
Now this dude may just have an axe to grind but I'm leaning to the its more then true. Besides running over to my moms house and beating the #### out of him, what should I/we do? I need the power of the FFA for a real cause this time folks. This has me upset. My little brother is a good kid (27) but isn't the brightest. If it comes down to it I can still #### him up so if I need to drag him into rehab I will - but I'm pretty sure he needs to want to go.

It's4:15 am I gotta go back to bed for an hour. ####.

 
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Even if the FB post is complete BS(which it probably isnt), he's been doing pills for 3 years and that's enough to put him into rehab.

No need for violence or to threaten him. It's never worked with junkies and never will. You can't beat the craving for dope out of him. No matter what he's stolen off people you care about or idiotic hurtful things he's done don't waste time slapping him around.

You can't drag a person to rehab they gotta go on their own. If they're going for you or your mom he's never gonna stay clean.

When you eventually have an intervention with him or just sit him down to talk about things he's gonna lie. He's gonna lie about anything and everything and he's gonna swear on people's lives that he's doing ok. He'll look you in the eyes, probably crying, and promise you he's ok. He's most likely lying. Junkies are the best liars you'll ever encounter.

Good luck. Its not an over exaggeration to say your brother is now fighting for his life because it's some sick #### he's on and his life will never be the same. Start talking to him today about it, about getting help, start being proactive.

 
You're not going to be able to force him to go to rehab.

If he doesn't want to go you could always try kidnapping him and locking him up somewhere for a couple weeks.

 
OK - I guess I needed to be clear in that I was kidding about beating his ###.

Anybody have experience with an intervention? Should I just talk to him man to man so he can just lie to me?

He lives with my mom - Should she kick him out unless he goes to rehab?

 
OK - I guess I needed to be clear in that I was kidding about beating his ###.

Anybody have experience with an intervention? Should I just talk to him man to man so he can just lie to me?

He lives with my mom - Should she kick him out unless he goes to rehab?
Unless he is creating an environment that is unhealthy, I wouldn't threaten him at all. The last thing that needs to happen is have the only people that care about him turn on him.

 
OK - I guess I needed to be clear in that I was kidding about beating his ###. Anybody have experience with an intervention? Should I just talk to him man to man so he can just lie to me? He lives with my mom - Should she kick him out unless he goes to rehab?
Unless he is creating an environment that is unhealthy, I wouldn't threaten him at all. The last thing that needs to happen is have the only people that care about him turn on him.
Every situation and person can be different, but with heroin addicts often the only thing that works is convincing them to go in rehab far away from any connections they have for 3-6 months. When. He comes back he needs to live by himself. Familiar environments can be triggers and easily lead back into old habits. That doesn't mean you don't support him, but he'll need to change his environment.And he'll need to find something to do as a replacement when the urge hits. Running is a great replacement. You can be hugely supportive by offering to run with him any time he needs it. 3am or whenever.Good luck. Heroin addiction ends badly so very often. The poster who said your brother is in a fight for his life is right. You should consider him the equivalent of someone with Stage 2 or 3 cancer.
 
OK - I guess I needed to be clear in that I was kidding about beating his ###. Anybody have experience with an intervention? Should I just talk to him man to man so he can just lie to me? He lives with my mom - Should she kick him out unless he goes to rehab?
Unless he is creating an environment that is unhealthy, I wouldn't threaten him at all. The last thing that needs to happen is have the only people that care about him turn on him.
I am a big believer in this but it is difficult having a junkie around your family. I think your a big problem for you mobbin, is that you brother is rather young; correct? Most people get to a point where they want to quit their addictions but he may not be there yet. I wish I had better advice for you but I do not. Walking the fine line between being supportive and being an enabler, is nearly impossible and your delineation of it will most assuredly not be his. My niece is a heroin addict, she has spent the better part of the last seven years in jail and in prison; she has certainly been clean while in jail but it does not last long when she gets out. I have no way of connecting with her that I know and I also believe that she has no idea on how to have fun without heroin. I have tried to talk to her, and tell her that I will help her, but I will not give her cash; this is where she usually disappears from my sight. I think daily about her dying but I do not know how to communicate in a meaningful way with her. I hope the best for you and will be reading here for suggestions from others.
 
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OK - I guess I needed to be clear in that I was kidding about beating his ###.

Anybody have experience with an intervention? Should I just talk to him man to man so he can just lie to me?

He lives with my mom - Should she kick him out unless he goes to rehab?
Unless he is creating an environment that is unhealthy, I wouldn't threaten him at all. The last thing that needs to happen is have the only people that care about him turn on him[b/].
I am a big believer in this but it is difficult having a junkie around your family. I think your a big problem for you mobbin, is that you brother is rather young; correct? Most people get to a point where they want to quit their addictions but he may not be there yet. I wish I had better advice for you but I do not. Walking the fine line between being supportive and being an enabler, is nearly impossible and your delineation of it will most assuredly not be his.My niece is a heroin addict, she has spent the better part of the last seven years in jail and in prison; she has certainly been clean while in jail but it does not last long when she gets out. I have no way of connecting with her that I know and I also believe that she has no idea on how to have fun without heroin. I have tried to talk to her, and tell her that I will help her, but I will not give her cash; this is where she usually disappears from my sight. I think daily about her dying but I do not know how to communicate in a meaningful way with her. I hope the best for you and will be reading here for suggestions from others.
Sorry to hear about your niece. I sincerely hope she manages to pull it together and get clean.

 
I wish had some good advice but the reality is it comes down to the addict wanting to change their life. Not sure you can force them. Some people go tough love but boy is that hard on everyone. Really no good one size fits all answer.

Best wishes to your brother and your family I hope it all works out for you guys.

 
Take him on a trip to Vancouver, Canada

Go to East Hastings Street, and let him soak it in... while sober

If that doesn't straighten a man from heroin, I can guarantee you that nothing will

not even a hollywood film could replicate what goes on there. the environment, the smell, the feel, the death and lifelessness.. it's truly one of the world's wonders

 
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OK - I guess I needed to be clear in that I was kidding about beating his ###.

Anybody have experience with an intervention? Should I just talk to him man to man so he can just lie to me?

He lives with my mom - Should she kick him out unless he goes to rehab?
Unless he is creating an environment that is unhealthy, I wouldn't threaten him at all. The last thing that needs to happen is have the only people that care about him turn on him[b/].
I am a big believer in this but it is difficult having a junkie around your family. I think your a big problem for you mobbin, is that you brother is rather young; correct? Most people get to a point where they want to quit their addictions but he may not be there yet. I wish I had better advice for you but I do not. Walking the fine line between being supportive and being an enabler, is nearly impossible and your delineation of it will most assuredly not be his.My niece is a heroin addict, she has spent the better part of the last seven years in jail and in prison; she has certainly been clean while in jail but it does not last long when she gets out. I have no way of connecting with her that I know and I also believe that she has no idea on how to have fun without heroin. I have tried to talk to her, and tell her that I will help her, but I will not give her cash; this is where she usually disappears from my sight. I think daily about her dying but I do not know how to communicate in a meaningful way with her. I hope the best for you and will be reading here for suggestions from others.
Sorry to hear about your niece. I sincerely hope she manages to pull it together and get clean.
Thanks NCC.
 
You do everything you can think of to help him. You talk to your mother about helping him too. Enlist professional advice.

Heroin addiction is brutal. The odds of him getting and staying clean is not in his favor. Be ready for a tremendous battle with many setbacks on the way. You have to step up though and do everything you can to help. Threatening to kick him out is the opposite of what should be done.

 
I wish had some good advice but the reality is it comes down to the addict wanting to change their life. Not sure you can force them. Some people go tough love but boy is that hard on everyone. Really no good one size fits all answer.

Best wishes to your brother and your family I hope it all works out for you guys.
This. t&p dude

 
Take him on a trip to Vancouver, Canada

Go to East Hastings Street, and let him soak it in... while sober

If that doesn't straighten a man from heroin, I can guarantee you that nothing will

not even a hollywood film could replicate what goes on there. the environment, the smell, the feel, the death and lifelessness.. it's truly one of the world's wonders
Scared straight is not going to work on a junkie.

 
Start looking into an intervention and pray he's not on heroin in the meantime.

I had a similar instance with my younger brother and as many have mentioned above your brother is going to have to want this. If you're close with him, try just talking to him...preferably early in the morning when he isnt high and see if you can make any sense to him. I'm not sure of the relationship you have with him but if you're close you'll be able to tell or get an idea if he's feeding you a bunch of BS regarding what you learned from this friend on FB. Either way, its better to be safe then sorry. Sadly, if he's made the jump to heroin already and is shooting it, you and your family are in for a long, disappointing time with him.

 
If he is open to getting clean, be very careful with Subutex/Suboxone. Tell him to not build up a tolerance because it's probably worse to get off of than whatever he's on. A lot of junkies just start taking subs hand over fist without realizing what they're doing. A) There is a ceiling on it's effectiveness, B) a little goes a long, long way, and C) withdrawal is excruciating and long. Like months. End up with a big sub dependency and you are all caps ####ed. A lot of doctors, even some addiction specialists, are still not at all up to speed on the stuff and are doling it out like it's candy then advising people with extremely bad info on how to stop taking it. Really messing people up from what I've read. I guess if he's a high relapse risk, which everybody is, the opiate blocker in Suboxone is a good idea, but I'd look into whether there are other options out there in the way of blockers. There has to be by now. His underlying issue could be depression and when the heroin is removed some use the Suboxone as an anti-depressant. Don't do that. There are much safer, less painful anti-depressants that he can get.

 
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Unfortunately you can't force someone to go to rehab and what's worse, you can't force them to stay til they get better. They have to make up their mind that they need to clean up. Most the time, these people delude themselves into believing that they aren't really addicts.

 
Take him on a trip to Vancouver, Canada

Go to East Hastings Street, and let him soak it in... while sober

If that doesn't straighten a man from heroin, I can guarantee you that nothing will

not even a hollywood film could replicate what goes on there. the environment, the smell, the feel, the death and lifelessness.. it's truly one of the world's wonders
Scared straight is not going to work on a junkie.
Ive seen Hastings works twice, on a friend and an acquaintance.

Gave them the ammunition to at least head to rehab

 
Thanks for the input. I'm meeting with him later today to play basketball. This is just a feeler. I haven't brought up the FB post at all even though he posted a response to it online.

 
GordonGekko said:
Anybody have experience with an intervention?
Had a guy who used to work for me, about 25 years ago, who was hooked on heroin. Locked him into an abandoned house for two months. With a four man team rotating overwatch, feeding him, cleaning him and making sure he was alive. He spent the entire time basically chained to a bed. Rehab centers, IMHO, are like most mental health facilities, they aren't there for help, they are there for babysitting. No offense to anyone working in that industry. They are there so no one dies and no one gets sued and everyone can say something is being done when usually very little long term help is going on. Rehab centers will also caution against the legal and emotional ramifications of a snatch and grab op. But this is because it would cut into their bottom line. Rehab centers make money by keeping you coming. No offense, but most of my lawyers I have on retainer call them "carwashes" They don't fix the problem, they "wash the car" so it doesn't look dirty. Then when the car sputters later, people send it back and you can charge them some more. If it was my brother, I'd get a crew of 3-4 trusted men. Hired if needed. And a secure soundproof location. With the cost considered mitigated against the total cost of a rehab stay and a lifelong dependency and daily worry as a stressor to you. Let him detox out for two months. Put a needle in front of him. Ask him if wants to use. If he does, then sadly, if it was my brother, he would tragically die of an overdose. If I found out he was using ever again after what I consider a high level detox, I suspect he would tragically die of an overdose. If it was my sister, it would be different, the burdens and responsibility in my eyes are not the same. Here's the problem, you are older, maybe the oldest, your priority is to "protect your family" As a junkie, he's not your brother, he's a zombie, and a threat to you and your mother and any other family you have. It's not just the theft, it's the kind of element the drugs attracts and could be brought near your Mom. Most of the time, when people say love is sacrifice, they mean money, or time, or effort, or will or struggle or heart ache. But sometimes, it's just that, sacrifice. Sometimes you carry the weight, so your family doesn't have to, that's how you protect them. My observation and experience is 99 percent of people heavily addicted to drugs never come out of the other side. If it was my brother, and it's not, I'd offer him, with all the love in the world, a pure opportunity and, if needed, a completely pure solution. Given no intervention, given free reign, IMHO, he will hurt your mother and family more than just emotionally and financially. When you pay for distance, you trade for weight. That's the price of being responsible for the safety of the people you love. Most people don't understand real sacrifice. Maybe you do. Maybe you will. I'm sorry for this situation and for your mother's sake, I'm sorry for what she's lost in a son. Good luck. ( Pittstown, sorry to hear about your niece. My genuine sympathies to your family. )
Thanks. Your post is sobering but (unfortunately) I share the same views as you.
 
Non Schtick answer is tell your mom to start hiding money. By that I mean that I have seen how the junkies start stealing everything that isn't nailed down, forging checks and selling everything when they need the cash. It is seriously a family killer this heroin and all the opiates, including Oxy. I hope that rehab works, but from what I have seen, the person really has to hit bottom before they are willing to finally make that change. What that bottom is will be different for everyone, hope your brother doesn't have to hit a really low one.

 
Call the Sherrifs and 5150 him. The 3 days under observation without the goods will be hell. It's a starting point.

 
Take him on a trip to Vancouver, Canada

Go to East Hastings Street, and let him soak it in... while sober

If that doesn't straighten a man from heroin, I can guarantee you that nothing will

not even a hollywood film could replicate what goes on there. the environment, the smell, the feel, the death and lifelessness.. it's truly one of the world's wonders
Cool, I'll be in Vancouver month, putting it on my tourist itinerary.

 
sorry to hear man. Hope he turns around. I had 2 uncles die of heroin and my best friend's beautiful 23 year old daughter is a junkie now in a 12 month program. Heroin ruins lives. Lots of lives. Really hope your brother turns it around.

 
No advice as thankfully I've never had to deal with this. Good luck and I hope you can get through to him.

 
My brothers response:

To all my fb friends if u got a mess from a BILL dont pay not mind its not true. Will give a test to prove it. Hes mad bc he lost his doc oh I mean money make. U suppose to take ur meds not tell them. Also check my body see any track marks no sir I dont think so. So thank u very much for the few who car and have a nice day.
Yes, I do nothing but bust his balls about his spelling - something I'm horrendously poor at myself. I swear, everybody under the age of 30 can't spell or worse - don't care.

So he bailed on playing ball with me yesterday.....

I think the truth lies somewhere in the middle. The dude who sent the original FB message to all of my brothers contacts is obviously crazy and has an axe to grind - at the same time - people don't take the time to go to all your friends and individually send them messages like that. (He isn't on my brother's friends list so he had to take the time to do that - all at 2AM.)

Thanks fo all the well wishes and advice. There isn't much I can do other then try to spend more time with him and support him. Cant force him to do anything so we shall see.

 
One thing you and your mother can do is get into a family of addicts support group. Not sure of the one for drugs but a group similar to al-anon. This will give you the tools to recognize and deal with his behavior if it escalates into full blown addiction. Most addicts will not reach out for help until they have hit their bottom and anything you or your mother do to delay that will only increase the length of his suffering. Providing a place to live and help with expenses are fine as long as he is not using. If he is using then you are only postponing the inevitable. He will lie, cheat and steal to get his fix and there will be a path of destruction in his wake. I will pray for you and your family to get the help you need to deal with this problem.

 
My brothers response:

To all my fb friends if u got a mess from a BILL dont pay not mind its not true. Will give a test to prove it. Hes mad bc he lost his doc oh I mean money make. U suppose to take ur meds not tell them. Also check my body see any track marks no sir I dont think so. So thank u very much for the few who car and have a nice day.
Yes, I do nothing but bust his balls about his spelling - something I'm horrendously poor at myself. I swear, everybody under the age of 30 can't spell or worse - don't care. So he bailed on playing ball with me yesterday..... I think the truth lies somewhere in the middle. The dude who sent the original FB message to all of my brothers contacts is obviously crazy and has an axe to grind - at the same time - people don't take the time to go to all your friends and individually send them messages like that. (He isn't on my brother's friends list so he had to take the time to do that - all at 2AM.) Thanks fo all the well wishes and advice. There isn't much I can do other then try to spend more time with him and support him. Cant force him to do anything so we shall see.
The proper response is to ask him what time to meet you to take that drug test today.
 
If he is offering to take a drug test, I'd take him up on it. Find a place that will take a blood and hair sample and pay to have him tested for a whole drug panel. None of this home pee test stuff that can be easily rigged.

Frame it as you want to protect his reputation and have the best evidence possible to discredit this Bill character.

 
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Geez that denial makes it clear he has intimate knowledge of a heroin user.

good luck

kids go from a $$$ oxy habit to a much cheaper heroin.

 
The east coast heroin is so pure that you don't have to shoot it if that's an issue for you. No track marks doesn't mean jack ####. Plus, some people will shoot between their toes to avoid the visible signs of IV use. I'd say that denial is more evidence for him using than against.

 
So long story short....

My mom was woken by a random naked girl and found my brother asleep on the bathroom floor with a needle in his arm, complete with a spoonful of herion.

I know other here have said you can't kick him out but I'm putting my foot down. He's going to rehab or I'm kicking him out of my mothers place.

Kid is toast. :(

 
Damn. You can't let him destroy all the lives around him. Time for action. Sounds like you already understand this.

 
That sucks moobin, hopefully he will take the rehab route. Good luck to you and your brother GB.
good luck, Moobin- can't imagine what you and your family are going through... including your brother.

how has the last year been? have you seen much of your brother? any evidence that he was using after that FB denial?

 
My younger brother has been using pills for a little while now (3 years) and I knew about it and had some talks with him but had no idea it was (or wasn't) this bad. I was no saint growing up so while I have busted his balls, I laid back hoping he would eventually grow out of it like I did. Well I received this little gem on from a complete stranger on FB:

WARNING about MOOBINS LITTLE BROTHER, He is addicted to heroin and if your part of his family than you might want to get him into a rehab. But he will need more than a 30 day program. If youre a friend of his than be careful of lending him money. All he is going to do is shoot it up and you may not see your money come back to you. He will start out asking for a little at first and pay that back, but he will build up your trust and ask for more till he wont be able to pay you. I know he has done this with several other people. So the best thing to help him is to not feed his habit. He had a friend named BILL who died from an over dose about 6months ago. He has another friend who has try to get him to go to a methadone clinic but he wont go there either. So if any of you care about him your try to get him so help.
Now this dude may just have an axe to grind but I'm leaning to the its more then true. Besides running over to my moms house and beating the #### out of him, what should I/we do? I need the power of the FFA for a real cause this time folks. This has me upset. My little brother is a good kid (27) but isn't the brightest. If it comes down to it I can still #### him up so if I need to drag him into rehab I will - but I'm pretty sure he needs to want to go.

It's4:15 am I gotta go back to bed for an hour. ####.
Is your first reaction to any problem to hit it with your fists? Your brother has a very serious, life-threatening addiction, and since he is an adult you can not force him into rehab.

I've known three guys that have had serious issues with heroine. Two are still struggling with it today and have been in and out of rehab programs. One has been clean for about 4 years but it basically cost him everything. Lost his job at a big lawfirm and is still struggling to get back everything he lost.

They are right about 30-day program won't cut it. He needs to move away from the area where he knows no one and get in an intensive treatment program. And I wouldn't wait.

 
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