Marital Advice - Friendly camping trip too friendly? (1 Viewer)

[bigbottom]

A couple things that haven't been mentioned. Your friend George played his cards right. Friends with both. Tried to have you find out on your own. Didn't work. Left a couple time bombs with other people to let you know. Now enough time has passed where his other buddy Steve has sworn him to secrecy etc. I am thinking George is very close o tell you everything. He wants to but is trying to play by the man rules.

What are the man rules here? First of all, if one of my buddies is hooking up with another friend's drunk wife, I'm putting a stop to it right then and there. And after the fact, I sure as hell am not going to participate in the cover-up.

 

[bigbottom]

Life would be a lot easier(and funner) if we didn't make such a big deal about sex. Everyone would be much happier.

funner?

 

[Real Man of Genius]

The Internet is kind of depressing today.

hi

When did you get back?

 

[ElvisMonster]

Now imagine Steve was black.

SOMEBODY HAD TO DO IT!!!! IT'S BEEN OVER 30 PAGES!!!

 

[PizzaDeliveryGuy]

Now imagine Steve was black. SOMEBODY HAD TO DO IT!!!! IT'S BEEN OVER 30 PAGES!!!

He's not? Then what is the big deal?

 

[General Malaise]

You know, this has become like the new spot to hang out all day. I like it here. Thanks ManHat.

 

[General Malaise]

So I'll ask again. What's the longest relationship you've been in?

I had no idea of mine's value for over 10 years and I am continually thankful my youthful folly did not lose what I have later come to appreciate do dearly. Luckily for me, it was I who was indiscrete and my wife who was wise in the early years.

What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?

He's not going have this figured out in the next couple of days, what he wants to do. He should inform himself. I stand by that. Telling him to stick his head in the sand is bad advice, and I don't care if you've been married happily for infinity years.

Stil no answer, so I presume we can assume you've never been in a longterm relationship, yet you are in here spouting advice on a topic in which you have no personal frame of reference and understanding. THe value of the tea is very important.

Ugh, I'm 30, I've had a 4 year relationship that didn't work out, and I'm engaged to my girlfriend of 3+ years.This have no bearing on wether or not Yellow Hat should consult a divorce attorney just to find out what he can do to protect himself in the event of a divorce.

No offense intended, but I think a 30 year old bachelor might not be giving the wisest advice here. This is an innernet message board and you're free to chime in, but maybe you should not push your agenda as the only viable solution when its really about something you do not yet comprehend.

Man, I find it strange that you are so vehemently attacking Hulk who is offering a decent option up. He hasn't said divorce her (which is what you are really arguing against). He is suggesting that the OP learn how to protect himself should this end up in divorce. Remember that he has a wife that apparently commited adultery. It's very possible that reconciliation will not be an option BY HER CHOICE. It's a huge leap of faith to think that this was a mistake that any loyal loving wife could make if they drank too much. Maybe she isn't sorry. Maybe she doesn't want to commit to their marriage any longer. Maybe this was a symptom of something much larger. Should he wait for her to file for divorce before he figures out how to protect himself? I would do EXACTLY what Hulk has suggested. The situation is unfortunate but choosing not to go to a lawyer doesn't make it "less unfortunate". Nothing he can do will make it "less unfortunate". If he decides to forgive then it's something that he's going to do in the face of thinking about divorce whether or not he sees an attorney. That's just the hand he's been dealt.Personally, I think your point of view is one that you "believe" because you have rationalized your behavior so you don't have to admit to yourself that, in fact, it was your behavior that devalued your marriage, and that it was you who had stolen something from your wife that she'll never get back. Your wife chose to not end it, but she'll never have what you originally promised her when you were married. It's easier for you to believe that your wife just did what every wife or husband who loves and is committed to their marriage should.

You have to think that because it's what allowed you to screw around and not lose your wife. But, trust me, every time she lays down with you she does it knowing that you layed down with someone else during your marriage. You have the luxury of ignoring it. She doesn't.

The salient point that cos was trying to make was that if he chooses the wrong divorce lawyer to sit down with, the lawyer may just see ManHat as a dollar bill and point him in a direction out of personal self interest. I think you can discern a lot about the divorce process without sitting down in the office of a lawyer and there is always a risk he chooses the wrong guy. Just slow down a little because now might not be the best time to have a salesman errrr lawyer bending your ear. Fair enough? Don't be rash to the divorce attorney.At least that's what I came away with. I think we all agree there's a time and a place for divorce.

 

[Steve in Minneapolis]

Did anyone else find it that his friends name is George? I have visions of Curious George in the bathroom watching this live pron going on...

 

[Widbil83]

A couple things that haven't been mentioned. Your friend George played his cards right. Friends with both. Tried to have you find out on your own. Didn't work. Left a couple time bombs with other people to let you know. Now enough time has passed where his other buddy Steve has sworn him to secrecy etc. I am thinking George is very close o tell you everything. He wants to but is trying to play by the man rules.

What are the man rules here? First of all, if one of my buddies is hooking up with another friend's drunk wife, I'm putting a stop to it right then and there. And after the fact, I sure as hell am not going to participate in the cover-up.

You never want to be "that" guy.

 

[PizzaDeliveryGuy]

Did anyone else find it that his friends name is George? I have visions of Curious George in the bathroom watching this live pron going on...

Did this camping trip take place in Minneapolis by any chance.:cough: :cough:

 

[Capella]

What's the latest update, I don't have time to read all of this. Last I checked around 1 PM, he found out she was holding his pud while he took a leak.

 

[General Malaise]

Did anyone else find it that his friends name is George? I have visions of Curious George in the bathroom watching this live pron going on...

Hi Steve in Minneapolis, General here in Portland. That is damn funny.

 

[General Malaise]

What's the latest update, I don't have time to read all of this. Last I checked around 1 PM, he found out she was holding his pud while he took a leak.

It was not pee.

 

[Capella]

What's the latest update, I don't have time to read all of this. Last I checked around 1 PM, he found out she was holding his pud while he took a leak.

It was not pee.

I'm listening..

 

[tdoss]

I...think...I...agree...with...tdoss...

I'll get the oil and alcohol ready...let me know when you're in my area...

 

[General Malaise]

What's the latest update, I don't have time to read all of this. Last I checked around 1 PM, he found out she was holding his pud while he took a leak.

It was not pee.

Then what the hell is it? Seriously. It's got to be pee.

My best guess? Schmegma. But I don't know what that is, really. I do know it's something, though.

 

[tdoss]

Life would be a lot easier(and funner) if we didn't make such a big deal about sex and grammar. Everyone would be much happier.

funner?

 

[falconeyed]

Has anyone commented on the general "yuck" factor of holding someone else's peepee while in a CAMPGROUND bathroom? Those places are THE last place on Earth I'd ever want to even consider getting it on in.

 

[tdoss]

Has anyone commented on the general "yuck" factor of holding someone else's peepee while in a CAMPGROUND bathroom? Those places are THE last place on Earth I'd ever want to even consider getting it on in.

I could be standing barefoot in the hole of a full port-a-john after a Jets game if that means a chick will be holding my ding-a-ling...add my willing wife to the equation and I'll need treatment for priapism...stat!

 

[Shrek]

Has anyone commented on the general "yuck" factor of holding someone else's peepee while in a CAMPGROUND bathroom? Those places are THE last place on Earth I'd ever want to even consider getting it on in.

Not that it's all that important, but I routinely camp with my family at campgrounds that have fully finished, nice bathrooms with clean showers and even stalls for getting dressed, putting your clothes, etc. They're not all glorified outhouses.

 

[Shrek]

FWIW, I have a very good friend who recently told me about how he and his wife pulled off a threesome with another chick. My friend's wife (who I have known longer than my friend BTW) is a sexual freak. Not that I have personally tapped it- but I know several people who have. She always flashes her rack when she gets drunk, and it's a very nice rack too. She has even gotten butt nekkid a few times over the years (once when hot tubbing, once on a dare) and everyone knows that's just her personality.

Furthermore, over the past 12+ years, she has made it known in no uncertain terms that she has always been bi-curious. Of course my friend has always been like about the prospect, but never thought it would amount to anything. The point is that she has always pushed that envelope.

So it happened, he brags to me about it (of course), I'm jealous (of course), and I even know the chick they had their tryst with. She is young and adventurous too. I may be jealous, but I'm actually glad that it isn't me and my wife in that situation because I think they may regret it later on. But I digress.

The point of relating this story is this. Maybe Steve and his wife are similar. Maybe she was involved a little bit (or a lot) with the sctual goings on in the stall. I personally know women that have told me that they love to see their man get excited around other women. Add in a little bi-curious angle and you've got the recipe for a spontaneous sexual situation.

So going to Steve's wife may be the exact WRONG thing to do.

 

[General Malaise]

FWIW, I have a very good friend who recently told me about how he and his wife pulled off a threesome with another chick. My friend's wife (who I have known longer than my friend BTW) is a sexual freak. Not that I have personally tapped it- but I know several people who have. She always flashes her rack when she gets drunk, and it's a very nice rack too. She has even gotten butt nekkid a few times over the years (once when hot tubbing, once on a dare) and everyone knows that's just her personality.Furthermore, over the past 12+ years, she has made it known in no uncertain terms that she has always been bi-curious. Of course my friend has always been like about the prospect, but never thought it would amount to anything. The point is that she has always pushed that envelope.So it happened, he brags to me about it (of course), I'm jealous (of course), and I even know the chick they had their tryst with. She is young and adventurous too. I may be jealous, but I'm actually glad that it isn't me and my wife in that situation because I think they may regret it later on. But I digress.The point of relating this story is this. Maybe Steve and his wife are similar. Maybe she was involved a little bit (or a lot) with the sctual goings on in the stall. I personally know women that have told me that they love to see their man get excited around other women. Add in a little bi-curious angle and you've got the recipe for a spontaneous sexual situation.So going to Steve's wife may be the exact WRONG thing to do.

:hawt:I had to edit this. I suck.

 

[tommyboy]

Has anyone commented on the general "yuck" factor of holding someone else's peepee while in a CAMPGROUND bathroom? Those places are THE last place on Earth I'd ever want to even consider getting it on in.

don't kid yourself. Given enough booze and drugs, I've seen chicks getting railed in broad daylight in dumpsters at Lollapalooza.

 

[tommyboy]

due to this thread, I sat and watched a full, yes a full HOUR of Temptation Island Australia on the Fox Reality Channel. It was awesome.

 

[tommyboy]

after much consideration, the only option is to #### the life out of Steves wife like she was a 3 dollar vietnamese hooker and you just spent 3 months crawling through rat tunnels. then send the video to Steve with a note "we're even".

 

[Strumey]

Manhat, sorry about all this. There are several on here who are being very supportive. I know I have leaned on this and another bored with personal problems before. One more opinion that thinks your wife cheated isnt going to help, but I think you should check email, text and phone records. Then I would confront the wife on what guy#3 told you. I have blacked out several times, but when reminded of what happened, several of those pieces came back to me. One of those was sex stuff. It can be forgotten in a blackout (not sure with chicks), but they certainly come back to a degree when reminded.

Most of us are behind you in this, so hang in there.

One last thing, regarding Hulk's advise to seek a lawyer, I dont know if a lawyer is the right move at this moment, but I sure as hell would stash a large sum of cash somewhere. Make sure it isnt trackable and build that up while you figure this all out. Once you start the divorce process, it all gets locked up.

 

[DrJ]

FWIW, I have a very good friend who recently told me about how he and his wife pulled off a threesome with another chick. My friend's wife (who I have known longer than my friend BTW) is a sexual freak. Not that I have personally tapped it- but I know several people who have. She always flashes her rack when she gets drunk, and it's a very nice rack too. She has even gotten butt nekkid a few times over the years (once when hot tubbing, once on a dare) and everyone knows that's just her personality.Furthermore, over the past 12+ years, she has made it known in no uncertain terms that she has always been bi-curious. Of course my friend has always been like about the prospect, but never thought it would amount to anything. The point is that she has always pushed that envelope.So it happened, he brags to me about it (of course), I'm jealous (of course), and I even know the chick they had their tryst with. She is young and adventurous too. I may be jealous, but I'm actually glad that it isn't me and my wife in that situation because I think they may regret it later on. But I digress.The point of relating this story is this. Maybe Steve and his wife are similar. Maybe she was involved a little bit (or a lot) with the sctual goings on in the stall. I personally know women that have told me that they love to see their man get excited around other women. Add in a little bi-curious angle and you've got the recipe for a spontaneous sexual situation.So going to Steve's wife may be the exact WRONG thing to do.

See, the only thing I don't understand is why Steve's wife came back with George then. So, she likes that Steve's getting his 'weiner' felt, she starts getting in on the action, and then decides to just go back with George and let the other 2 do their thing? I dunno, but it seems like it would take a real crazy freak for that.

 

[SuperJohn96]

Has anyone commented on the general "yuck" factor of holding someone else's peepee while in a CAMPGROUND bathroom? Those places are THE last place on Earth I'd ever want to even consider getting it on in.

I could be standing barefoot in the hole of a full port-a-john after a Jets game if that means a chick will be holding my ding-a-ling...add my willing wife to the equation and I'll need treatment for priapism...stat!

:lookingupthisword:Hmm...

 

[Steve in Minneapolis]

Did anyone else find it hilarious that his friends name is George? I have visions of Curious George in the bathroom watching this live pron going on...

Did this camping trip take place in Minneapolis by any chance.:cough: :cough:

 

[SuperJohn96]

Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood is on the radio right now.

 

[Franknbeans]

Really? Im surprised at how many guys in this thread would stick around after their wife ****ed another man.

I actually don't think that number is that high, and that most guys in here would be looking for a divorce. I've been with my wife for 15 years, married 11. If one drunken night she has an affair, I am not going to let that ruin 15 years of being together, and I don't even have kids. I am sure that it won't be easy, and will take a lot of time to get over, but its not worth throwing nearly half of my life away for. If she came to me and said that she fell in love with another man, that would be another story.

wow, 17 years here and she would be out the door if she cheated.eta: unless it was with a woman.

what if the woman looked like a man, say your dad

 

[Sweet J]

Dear Man in the Yellow Hat: If you ever get in a situation again where someone is screwing with your wife, I suggest you take the lead of one of the most respected posters here. This is how he handled a similar situation, just today:

JESUS ####### CHRIST, I WILL ABSOLUTELY THROW MY FIST INTO YOUR MOUTH WITH ALL I'VE GOT IF I EVER EVER SEE YOUR ####### FACE FOR EVEN SUGGESTING THAT I'D FIND THAT FUNNY OR OKAY IT.YOU'VE GOT A LOT OF NERVE, MOTHER ####ER.that's right, i went all caps.

See? Easy as pie.

Who is that and where is it from?

IvanKaramasov wanted to show YankeeFan23's wife the Democratic talking points. That's bad judgment right there.

 

[prosopis]

Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood is on the radio right now.

That song turns me on.

 

[PsychoMan]

Looking into a divorce at this stage is a little crazy if you ask me. The guy has been married for years, and has children. He needs to keep seeking the truth about what happened that night. Even if he finds out that the wife did something that hurts their marriage, he should at least do everything in his power to save it, at the very least, for his kids. To even consider bailing out on his wife and kids at this point seems like a knee-jerk reaction to a lot of circumstantial evidence.

I would first get the facts straight, then have a long talk with the wife about what exactly happened, what they need to change in their relationship (like being too flirty with their friends, getting too wasted, etc), and how they're going to repair the broken trust and hurt feelings in their marriage.

 

[3C's]

Looking into a divorce at this stage is a little crazy if you ask me. The guy has been married for years, and has children. He needs to keep seeking the truth about what happened that night. Even if he finds out that the wife did something that hurts their marriage, he should at least do everything in his power to save it, at the very least, for his kids. To even consider bailing out on his wife and kids at this point seems like a knee-jerk reaction to a lot of circumstantial evidence.I would first get the facts straight, then have a long talk with the wife about what exactly happened, what they need to change in their relationship (like being too flirty with their friends, getting too wasted, etc), and how they're going to repair the broken trust and hurt feelings in their marriage.

 

[riverrat]

Looking into a divorce at this stage is a little crazy if you ask me. The guy has been married for years, and has children. He needs to keep seeking the truth about what happened that night. Even if he finds out that the wife did something that hurts their marriage, he should at least do everything in his power to save it, at the very least, for his kids. To even consider bailing out on his wife and kids at this point seems like a knee-jerk reaction to a lot of circumstantial evidence.I would first get the facts straight, then have a long talk with the wife about what exactly happened, what they need to change in their relationship (like being too flirty with their friends, getting too wasted, etc), and how they're going to repair the broken trust and hurt feelings in their marriage.

Talking to a lawyer and starting divorce proceedings are two different things. I would talk to one, explain the situation, tell them I haven't made up my mind exactly what happened or what to do, and wanted some advice on some steps to safeguard myself and kids. The lawyer could also advise on how to continue checking things out. Also, if it gets to the point where he feels he needs an investigator, the lawyer could recomend some.Also, if he gets a line that "I'm sorry, we have a conflict of interest and can't talk to you" he will know his wife has consulted that lawyer.

 

[Warhogs]

This thread has been one of the most interesting ina long time. Here is my best piece of advice for MITYH....

DO NOT SEEK ADVICE HERE!!!

Actually, I think some of the advice here might be helpful but a large portion of the advice is pretty bad. But very entertaining.

 

[patrickmcgroin]

Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood is on the radio right now.

That song turns me on.

If Toby Keith or some other male country singer did a song called "Before She Cheats" it would have been protested against for domestic abuse.

 

[3C's]

This thread has been one of the most interesting ina long time. Here is my best piece of advice for MITYH....DO NOT SEEK ADVICE HERE!!!Actually, I think some of the advice here might be helpful but a large portion of the advice is pretty bad. But very entertaining.

Seriously. The "kick his ###" "confront him" "kick her out of the house" type of advice based on pretty sketchy circumstantial evidence is bad.

 

[prosopis]

Before He Cheats by Carrie Underwood is on the radio right now.

That song turns me on.

If Toby Keith or some other male country singer did a song called "Before She Cheats" it would have been protested against for domestic abuse.

I dont care. That song gives me fanatasy's of Carrie Underwood beating the hell out of me and I like it.

 

[prosopis]

This thread has been one of the most interesting ina long time. Here is my best piece of advice for MITYH....DO NOT SEEK ADVICE HERE!!!Actually, I think some of the advice here might be helpful but a large portion of the advice is pretty bad. But very entertaining.

Seriously. The "kick his ###" "confront him" "kick her out of the house" type of advice based on pretty sketchy circumstantial evidence is bad.

How is confronting the guy bad advice?

 

[3C's]

This thread has been one of the most interesting ina long time. Here is my best piece of advice for MITYH....DO NOT SEEK ADVICE HERE!!!Actually, I think some of the advice here might be helpful but a large portion of the advice is pretty bad. But very entertaining.

Seriously. The "kick his ###" "confront him" "kick her out of the house" type of advice based on pretty sketchy circumstantial evidence is bad.

How is confronting the guy bad advice?

Confronting in the "confrontational manner" which some here would suggest is bad.

 

[Sweet J]

I'm sorry to bring up old advice, but I STILL think the best option is pooping on Steve's couch.

The things it accomplishes:

1) You establish to Steve that you are a little bit crazy. Would you ever, ever, ever screw with a guy who would drive 2 hours just to break into your house and crap on your furniture, in broad daylight, without even talking to you? If you are capaple of that, MITYH, you are capable of anything. You come off a little like Gene Wilder doing Karate in Stir Crazy. You'd better get Bad, Jack! You get Bad, they don't mess wit ya.

2) You want your wife to know that you are extremely serious in your disappointment of her behavior, but you don't want to divorce her, and you don't want to do anything that will make her leave you. Bingo -- this strikes the perfect balance of "my husband can be a crazy, dangerous man" and "well, it wasn't that bad what he did. It's not like he hit me or is violent."

3) This may be the very thing to get you back in good graces, sexually, with your wife. THINK about it: where did all of this trouble start? IN THE BATHROOM!! Now, interpret that how you will, but you gotta at least bring it full circle here.

 

[Keerock]

Looking into a divorce at this stage is a little crazy if you ask me. The guy has been married for years, and has children. He needs to keep seeking the truth about what happened that night. Even if he finds out that the wife did something that hurts their marriage, he should at least do everything in his power to save it, at the very least, for his kids. To even consider bailing out on his wife and kids at this point seems like a knee-jerk reaction to a lot of circumstantial evidence.I would first get the facts straight, then have a long talk with the wife about what exactly happened, what they need to change in their relationship (like being too flirty with their friends, getting too wasted, etc), and how they're going to repair the broken trust and hurt feelings in their marriage.

 

[code]

due to this thread, I sat and watched a full, yes a full HOUR of Temptation Island Australia on the Fox Reality Channel. It was awesome.

Interesting...my twin nephews are staying with us and I watched an entire episode of Curious George with them this morning...saw it in a whole new light...

 

[JNox3]

OP Still hasn't given any details. You people are such suckers.

 

[wildbill]

Looking into a divorce at this stage is a little crazy if you ask me. The guy has been married for years, and has children. He needs to keep seeking the truth about what happened that night. Even if he finds out that the wife did something that hurts their marriage, he should at least do everything in his power to save it, at the very least, for his kids. To even consider bailing out on his wife and kids at this point seems like a knee-jerk reaction to a lot of circumstantial evidence.

I would first get the facts straight, then have a long talk with the wife about what exactly happened, what they need to change in their relationship (like being too flirty with their friends, getting too wasted, etc), and how they're going to repair the broken trust and hurt feelings in their marriage.

Talking to a lawyer and starting divorce proceedings are two different things. I would talk to one, explain the situation, tell them I haven't made up my mind exactly what happened or what to do, and wanted some advice on some steps to safeguard myself and kids. The lawyer could also advise on how to continue checking things out. Also, if it gets to the point where he feels he needs an investigator, the lawyer could recomend some.Also, if he gets a line that "I'm sorry, we have a conflict of interest and can't talk to you" he will know his wife has consulted that lawyer.

You don't go to a divorce lawyer to safeguard your kids, you go to safeguard your finances. If you want to safeguard your kids then see a marriage counselor and keep the family together.But if you just want to get back at your wife regardless of how it affects your kids, then yeah go ahead and see a lawyer.

 

[Colin Dowling]

 

[PsychoMan]

i can't believe i have read every post in this 38 page thread over the last 4 days. this is so interesting i don't want to miss a single post!

the curious george goes camping was classic too

 

[Rayderr]

OP Still hasn't given any details. You people are such suckers.

Back when I had my marital crisis and posted about it on this board, after the first day, i took several days before I posted again. Yet, it was all legit.