Need some advice for writing my novel

[Zow]

I'm impressed....but the aliens planted humans on earth about 2 million years ago. That "science" part needs a little work.

I took that to mean they planted some among the ones already here. Maybe I took it wrong.

No they created humans and helped guide them to doing the work gathering resources for them

Okay, this doesn't make sense given what we know about evolution and how old the Earth is. If this really was their plan, it'd take forever and be a really dumb plan.

 

[MC Gas Money]

A good name would be "Time Passes Slowly"

It doesnt jump all over the place. The prologue explains what happened on earth and with the asteroid then the main story takes place almost 1000 years from today.

As an editor, I advise you to chuck the prologue in the trash and start the story where the story starts.

I have to explain how things got this way. I was going to use a device in between certain chapters as excerpts from an old historians writings that have been long forbidden by the elites. That will explain some of the backstory.

Maybe its difficult to convey what im thinking

I like that device way better than I do the prologue idea. [/quote

I wasnt to call it a prologue but it serves the same purpose

 

[Freelove]

A good name would be "Time Passes Slowly"

It doesnt jump all over the place. The prologue explains what happened on earth and with the asteroid then the main story takes place almost 1000 years from today.

As an editor, I advise you to chuck the prologue in the trash and start the story where the story starts.

I have to explain how things got this way. I was going to use a device in between certain chapters as excerpts from an old historians writings that have been long forbidden by the elites. That will explain some of the backstory.

Maybe its difficult to convey what im thinking

Follow your muse.

ETA: to me, that sounds less like the prologue/backstory and more like a revelation that becomes both the sci-fi payoff AND the cognitive dissonance that drives the plot later on.

 

[MC Gas Money]

I'm impressed....but the aliens planted humans on earth about 2 million years ago. That "science" part needs a little work.

I took that to mean they planted some among the ones already here. Maybe I took it wrong.

No they created humans and helped guide them to doing the work gathering resources for them

Okay, this doesn't make sense given what we know about evolution and how old the Earth is. If this really was their plan, it'd take forever and be a really dumb plan.

They do it all over the galaxy. Plant intelligent life at different intervals that will eventual make their planet prosperous and collect tons of resources neccessary for life. Then come and take it.

They have these projects running at all different times. It doesnt always work. Humans almost destroyed their planet so they send them the asteroid to get them off the planet to sustain themselves instead of letting the experiment go bust.

They plant or change the evolution off different lifeformd on different planets

 

[Ilov80s]

Sounds cool, I like the historian idea inbetween chapters. Good luck. I also think you should consider making it a graphic novel or illustrated in some way.

 

[[icon]]

I can see how investing the better part of a year in a project with a fraction of a chance of earning any money would be a priority for an unemployed fella.

 

[Ilov80s]

A good name would be "Time Passes Slowly"

It doesnt jump all over the place. The prologue explains what happened on earth and with the asteroid then the main story takes place almost 1000 years from today.

As an editor, I advise you to chuck the prologue in the trash and start the story where the story starts.

I have to explain how things got this way. I was going to use a device in between certain chapters as excerpts from an old historians writings that have been long forbidden by the elites. That will explain some of the backstory.

Maybe its difficult to convey what im thinking

I like that device way better than I do the prologue idea. [/quote

I wasnt to call it a prologue but it serves the same purpose

It can just be the first of your historian excerpts.

 

[MC Gas Money]

The premise

In about 100 years earth is close to being destroyed until a very large and resource rich asteroid mysteriously enters the solar system and takes orbit around the sun.

The humans transplant themselves to the asteroid and heal the earth using it to maximum efficiency for food, air and water. Only a small population of workers and "nature warden" live and work on earth. The wardens use nanotechnology to control things like weather and are basically superheroes .

Nanotechnology is forbidden on the asteroid.

Now several hundred years later the asteroid has turned in to a totalitarian society where everyone has to work for even things like oxygen. The elites who control things have massive stockpiles of air, watet, etc

Aliens arrive to take these resources. Turns out they planted humans on earth thousands of years ago and even sent the asteroid all along manipulating man in to doing their work of collecting resources and also basically removing themselves from earth. They do it all over the galaxy.

The humans fight and win with the help of the nanobot infused wardens that the elites lose control of. They liberate themselves from the aliens and the elites.

Have you considered writing under the pseudonym MC. Ron Hubbard?

How is this similiar to hubbard?

 

[Ilov80s]

I'm impressed....but the aliens planted humans on earth about 2 million years ago. That "science" part needs a little work.

I took that to mean they planted some among the ones already here. Maybe I took it wrong.

No they created humans and helped guide them to doing the work gathering resources for them

Okay, this doesn't make sense given what we know about evolution and how old the Earth is. If this really was their plan, it'd take forever and be a really dumb plan.

But maybe the aliens live so damn long that human existence is very short to them or they live in some dimension/realm/vacuum where time is not what it is to us.

 

[MC Gas Money]

I can see how investing the better part of a year in a project with a fraction of a chance of earning any money would be a priority for an unemployed fella.

Its not a huge time investment and im looking for work.

Even if I just write a minimum of one page a day it will onpy take a year. Not a large time investment

 

[MC Gas Money]

I'm impressed....but the aliens planted humans on earth about 2 million years ago. That "science" part needs a little work.

I took that to mean they planted some among the ones already here. Maybe I took it wrong.

No they created humans and helped guide them to doing the work gathering resources for them

Okay, this doesn't make sense given what we know about evolution and how old the Earth is. If this really was their plan, it'd take forever and be a really dumb plan.

But maybe the aliens live so damn long that human existence is very short to them or they live in some dimension/realm/vacuum where time is not what it is to us.

Hominids didnt show up except for a few hundred thousand years ago. What does the age of the earth matter?

Maybe the alien civilization is only a couple million years old and knows how to manipulate other civilizations to do what they want within a certain timeframe. Like each planet is their own petri dish

 

[MC Gas Money]

The aliens will be way beyond clean energy but will still need organic matter. Each planet is just a farm to them and they take what they want when the time is right. Rinse and repeat

 

[Al O'Pecia]

The premise

In about 100 years earth is close to being destroyed until a very large and resource rich asteroid mysteriously enters the solar system and takes orbit around the sun.

The humans transplant themselves to the asteroid and heal the earth using it to maximum efficiency for food, air and water. Only a small population of workers and "nature warden" live and work on earth. The wardens use nanotechnology to control things like weather and are basically superheroes .

Nanotechnology is forbidden on the asteroid.

Now several hundred years later the asteroid has turned in to a totalitarian society where everyone has to work for even things like oxygen. The elites who control things have massive stockpiles of air, watet, etc

Aliens arrive to take these resources. Turns out they planted humans on earth thousands of years ago and even sent the asteroid all along manipulating man in to doing their work of collecting resources and also basically removing themselves from earth. They do it all over the galaxy.

The humans fight and win with the help of the nanobot infused wardens that the elites lose control of. They liberate themselves from the aliens and the elites.

Have you considered writing under the pseudonym MC. Ron Hubbard?

How is this similiar to hubbard?

Xenu was, according to Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard, the dictator of the "Galactic Confederacy" who 75 million years ago brought billionsvof his people to Earth.

By the way, I agree with everyone saying that you should do a graphic novel. You're a talented artist and you seem to enjoy drawing. Why not incorporate that skill into your story? It's provides both another way for the reader to enjoy the story and for you to potentially get noticed.

 

[MC Gas Money]

The premise

In about 100 years earth is close to being destroyed until a very large and resource rich asteroid mysteriously enters the solar system and takes orbit around the sun.

The humans transplant themselves to the asteroid and heal the earth using it to maximum efficiency for food, air and water. Only a small population of workers and "nature warden" live and work on earth. The wardens use nanotechnology to control things like weather and are basically superheroes .

Nanotechnology is forbidden on the asteroid.

Now several hundred years later the asteroid has turned in to a totalitarian society where everyone has to work for even things like oxygen. The elites who control things have massive stockpiles of air, watet, etc

Aliens arrive to take these resources. Turns out they planted humans on earth thousands of years ago and even sent the asteroid all along manipulating man in to doing their work of collecting resources and also basically removing themselves from earth. They do it all over the galaxy.

The humans fight and win with the help of the nanobot infused wardens that the elites lose control of. They liberate themselves from the aliens and the elites.

Have you considered writing under the pseudonym MC. Ron Hubbard?

How is this similiar to hubbard?

Xenu was, according to Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard, the dictator of the "Galactic Confederacy" who 75 million years ago brought billionsvof his people to Earth.

By the way, I agree with everyone saying that you should do a graphic novel. You're a talented artist and you seem to enjoy drawing. Why not incorporate that skill into your story? It's provides both another way for the reader to enjoy the story and for you to potentially get noticed.

I dont see any glaring similiarities to hubbards work.

If I do it as a comic can I publish that online?

 

[MC Gas Money]

That xenu stuff is the most ridiculous thing ive ever read and none of it is similiar to my idea

 

[Freelove]

Sure. Amazon Kindle does graphic novels.

If you're willing to go the graphic novel route, and are willing to tweak the plot a little to make it about your hero's erotic gay space adventures, you'd be in the top 100 in your category the day you published.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Sure. Amazon Kindle does graphic novels.

If you're willing to go the graphic novel route, and are willing to tweak the plot a little to make it about your hero's erotic gay space adventures, you'd be in the top 100 in your category the day you published.

No its going to be serious. Doing it as a graphic novel is going to make it take much longer to finish and I will not be able to color

 

[Freelove]

Sure. Amazon Kindle does graphic novels.

If you're willing to go the graphic novel route, and are willing to tweak the plot a little to make it about your hero's erotic gay space adventures, you'd be in the top 100 in your category the day you published.

No its going to be serious. Doing it as a graphic novel is going to make it take much longer to finish and I will not be able to color

Yeah, I don't know #### all about comic publishing. No advice other than the gay space adventures stuff.

 

[Zow]

That xenu stuff is the most ridiculous thing ive ever read and none of it is similiar to my idea

Well, it was apparently a brilliant enough sci-fi story that it sparked an entire new religion so...

 

[MC Gas Money]

I could publish the comic online too but id rather just do this as a book. I can start it now . I dont have the art equipment.

If it becomes popular at all I could always do the graphic novelization to appeal to a larger audience

 

[MC Gas Money]

That xenu stuff is the most ridiculous thing ive ever read and none of it is similiar to my idea

Well, it was apparently a brilliant enough sci-fi story that it sparked an entire new religion so...

If I wrote a book and formed my own multi billion dollar cult that should shut up the haters

 

[Freelove]

That xenu stuff is the most ridiculous thing ive ever read and none of it is similiar to my idea

Well, it was apparently a brilliant enough sci-fi story that it sparked an entire new religion so...

If I wrote a book and formed my own multi billion dollar cult that should shut up the haters

Because if there's one guy whose life never engendered any ridicule, it was L. Ron Hubbard's.

 

[Sarnoff]

The humans should also play marbles a lot.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Upon reading further about Hubbard it seems we have a lot in common.

Persecution complex

Delusions of grandeur

Borderline paranoid schizophrenia

Obviously I think his scientology writing is ridiculous but I did enjoy Battlefield Earth when I was a kid. This was long before I ever heard of scientology.

I think I am a better writer than he is and my ideas are much more realistic. Maybe I do have the makings of a successful science fiction writer.

I would never try to pass them off as anything other than fiction though. I dont believe in religions and cults as a philosophy.

 

[Freelove]

Upon reading further about Hubbard it seems we have a lot in common.

Persecution complex

Delusions of grandeur

Borderline paranoid schizophrenia

Obviously I think his scientology writing is ridiculous but I did enjoy Battlefield Earth when I was a kid. This was long before I ever heard of scientology.

I think I am a better writer than he is and my ideas are much more realistic. Maybe I do have the makings of a successful science fiction writer.

I would never try to pass them off as anything other than fiction though. I dont believe in religions and cults as a philosophy.

Hell, stop asking advice and get crackin'. Easy damn money to be made if you're better than a sci-fi legend.

 

[trogg78]

Upon reading further about Hubbard it seems we have a lot in common.

Persecution complex

Delusions of grandeur

Borderline paranoid schizophrenia

Obviously I think his scientology writing is ridiculous but I did enjoy Battlefield Earth when I was a kid. This was long before I ever heard of scientology.

I think I am a better writer than he is and my ideas are much more realistic. Maybe I do have the makings of a successful science fiction writer.

I would never try to pass them off as anything other than fiction though. I dont believe in religions and cults as a philosophy.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Upon reading further about Hubbard it seems we have a lot in common.

Persecution complex

Delusions of grandeur

Borderline paranoid schizophrenia

Obviously I think his scientology writing is ridiculous but I did enjoy Battlefield Earth when I was a kid. This was long before I ever heard of scientology.

I think I am a better writer than he is and my ideas are much more realistic. Maybe I do have the makings of a successful science fiction writer.

I would never try to pass them off as anything other than fiction though. I dont believe in religions and cults as a philosophy.

Hell, stop asking advice and get crackin'. Easy damn money to be made if you're better than a sci-fi legend.

Battlefield Earth was a good book but that Xenu stuff he wrote is ridiculous and not very creative or interesting. Other than reading BE and a little bit online about Xenu its my opinion that he had some highs and lows. BE had some really ridiculous things and spotty dialogue in it too, and was way longer than it had to be.Besides being able to brainwash people with Dianetics and Scientology was he really that well renowned as just a science fiction writer?

 

[johnnycakes]

MC dude... I'm telling you, you could roll this schtick into some hard cash if you played your cards right..... you'd need to get some 1:1 interviews with real FBGs... roll it out as "who do you really meet on the innerwebs" type of deal... some may provide some good insight, than turn to bite their handler like a viper. Or something like that.

 

[Sweet J]

What about E-publishing? Cant you put it up and people can buy the dl for a few bucks and maybe it gets good word of mouth and a publisher takes interest?

PM Jamny. He epublished his father's books.

Jamny can you help?

there is just no piece of advice this guy will take

well, in fairness the last time he PM'd someone on here it seemed to blow up

Yeah im not sending out random PMs right now. I dont want to get reported for spamming

Jesus you are a dumb-###. I don't know how many people on these boards I have PM'd random questions too, and they all (even shuke) have given kind, thoughtful replies. If you can't be trusted to send a random poster on a football forum an inocuous question, then people need to take all sharp objects (including pens and pencils) away from you, and you need to buy a sippy cup so you don't drool on yourself. And a bib to protect your clothes even after unsuccessfully trying to use the sippy cup.

 

[Sarnoff]

You should drink a lot of alcohol and consider doing some strong drugs. All great writers have done this.

 

[johnnycakes]

You should drink a lot of alcohol and consider doing some strong drugs. All great writers have done this.

I have made a similar suggestion. Only sans alcohol.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Anyway, if you guys want to help in any way with the story I would love to hear some suggestions for futuristic human names, first and last, and alien names, but nothing that sounds too ridiculous like Xenu or other campy alien names.

The aliens are humanoid with some strange physiology like forearms and shins much longer than a humans. 2 fingers oj each hand with 2 opposable thumbs on both sides of the palm. Sharp teeth and claws, skeleton like nose and no eyes ( they have different sensory organs in their heads). Despite looking dangerous they are civilized and able to communicate well and have an advanced peaceful society among themselves.

Im also having trouble thinking of a name for thr inhabited asteroid. I want something that sounds religious because it is viewed as the mysterious saviour of mankind. Earth is now just knows as "the surface"

Im also going to use some of your avatar names as the names of some of the human battleships where it fits, if that ok with you guys.

 

[Zow]

:

Anyway, if you guys want to help in any way with the story I would love to hear some suggestions for futuristic human names, first and last, and alien names, but nothing that sounds too ridiculous like Xenu or other campy alien names.

The aliens are humanoid with some strange physiology like forearms and shins much longer than a humans. 2 fingers oj each hand with 2 opposable thumbs on both sides of the palm. Sharp teeth and claws, skeleton like nose and no eyes ( they have different sensory organs in their heads). Despite looking dangerous they are civilized and able to communicate well and have an advanced peaceful society among themselves.

Im also having trouble thinking of a name for thr inhabited asteroid. I want something that sounds religious because it is viewed as the mysterious saviour of mankind. Earth is now just knows as "the surface"

Im also going to use some of your avatar names as the names of some of the human battleships where it fits, if that ok with you guys.

Sure, for a percentage of royalties.

 

[MC Gas Money]

What about E-publishing? Cant you put it up and people can buy the dl for a few bucks and maybe it gets good word of mouth and a publisher takes interest?

PM Jamny. He epublished his father's books.

Jamny can you help?

there is just no piece of advice this guy will take

well, in fairness the last time he PM'd someone on here it seemed to blow up

Yeah im not sending out random PMs right now. I dont want to get reported for spamming

Jesus you are a dumb-###. I don't know how many people on these boards I have PM'd random questions too, and they all (even shuke) have given kind, thoughtful replies. If you can't be trusted to send a random poster on a football forum an inocuous question, then people need to take all sharp objects (including pens and pencils) away from you, and you need to buy a sippy cup so you don't drool on yourself. And a bib to protect your clothes even after unsuccessfully trying to use the sippy cup.

You must have missed the thread that im referring to. Chill out I wasnt being serious.

 

[MC Gas Money]

:

Anyway, if you guys want to help in any way with the story I would love to hear some suggestions for futuristic human names, first and last, and alien names, but nothing that sounds too ridiculous like Xenu or other campy alien names.

The aliens are humanoid with some strange physiology like forearms and shins much longer than a humans. 2 fingers oj each hand with 2 opposable thumbs on both sides of the palm. Sharp teeth and claws, skeleton like nose and no eyes ( they have different sensory organs in their heads). Despite looking dangerous they are civilized and able to communicate well and have an advanced peaceful society among themselves.

Im also having trouble thinking of a name for thr inhabited asteroid. I want something that sounds religious because it is viewed as the mysterious saviour of mankind. Earth is now just knows as "the surface"

Im also going to use some of your avatar names as the names of some of the human battleships where it fits, if that ok with you guys.

Sure, for a percentage of royalties.

For using some of your avatar names as an homage?

I was going to mention everyone in the "thank you" section

 

[trogg78]

Anyway, if you guys want to help in any way with the story I would love to hear some suggestions for futuristic human names, first and last, and alien names, but nothing that sounds too ridiculous like Xenu or other campy alien names.

The aliens are humanoid with some strange physiology like forearms and shins much longer than a humans. 2 fingers oj each hand with 2 opposable thumbs on both sides of the palm. Sharp teeth and claws, skeleton like nose and no eyes ( they have different sensory organs in their heads). Despite looking dangerous they are civilized and able to communicate well and have an advanced peaceful society among themselves.

Im also having trouble thinking of a name for thr inhabited asteroid. I want something that sounds religious because it is viewed as the mysterious saviour of mankind. Earth is now just knows as "the surface"

Im also going to use some of your avatar names as the names of some of the human battleships where it fits, if that ok with you guys.

You can't use mine. I've already email it to myself. It's my intellectual property!

 

[MC Gas Money]

:

Anyway, if you guys want to help in any way with the story I would love to hear some suggestions for futuristic human names, first and last, and alien names, but nothing that sounds too ridiculous like Xenu or other campy alien names.

The aliens are humanoid with some strange physiology like forearms and shins much longer than a humans. 2 fingers oj each hand with 2 opposable thumbs on both sides of the palm. Sharp teeth and claws, skeleton like nose and no eyes ( they have different sensory organs in their heads). Despite looking dangerous they are civilized and able to communicate well and have an advanced peaceful society among themselves.

Im also having trouble thinking of a name for thr inhabited asteroid. I want something that sounds religious because it is viewed as the mysterious saviour of mankind. Earth is now just knows as "the surface"

Im also going to use some of your avatar names as the names of some of the human battleships where it fits, if that ok with you guys.

Sure, for a percentage of royalties.

For using some of your avatar names as an homage?

I was going to mention everyone in the "thank you" section

 

[MC Gas Money]

Anyway, if you guys want to help in any way with the story I would love to hear some suggestions for futuristic human names, first and last, and alien names, but nothing that sounds too ridiculous like Xenu or other campy alien names.

The aliens are humanoid with some strange physiology like forearms and shins much longer than a humans. 2 fingers oj each hand with 2 opposable thumbs on both sides of the palm. Sharp teeth and claws, skeleton like nose and no eyes ( they have different sensory organs in their heads). Despite looking dangerous they are civilized and able to communicate well and have an advanced peaceful society among themselves.

Im also having trouble thinking of a name for thr inhabited asteroid. I want something that sounds religious because it is viewed as the mysterious saviour of mankind. Earth is now just knows as "the surface"

Im also going to use some of your avatar names as the names of some of the human battleships where it fits, if that ok with you guys.

You can't use mine. I've already email it to myself. It's my intellectual property!

Yours isnt one I think would work

 

[MC Gas Money]

MC dude... I'm telling you, you could roll this schtick into some hard cash if you played your cards right..... you'd need to get some 1:1 interviews with real FBGs... roll it out as "who do you really meet on the innerwebs" type of deal... some may provide some good insight, than turn to bite their handler like a viper. Or something like that.

I dont understand what you mean

 

[Sweet J]

Ahh, eff it. I'm just a grump old man at this point.

 

[MC Gas Money]

You should drink a lot of alcohol and consider doing some strong drugs. All great writers have done this.

I have made a similar suggestion. Only sans alcohol.

Ive got that covered but no drugs man. I put that stuff behind me

 

[Sarnoff]

All great writers write from within a deep pit of personal self-loathing. I do not feel as if you have enough internal despair yet. You should live more and lose more and then you'll be ready.

 

[bluemagic]

This is great.

Years ago you claimed you had sex with your mom and you needed help with writing song lyrics. Now you're claiming some mental disorder and asking for help with writing a book.

Heroin addiction.

Alcohol addiction.

Needed alcohol to have sex with the fat girl.

All stories you have tried.

Jason, when do you plan to stop with the fishing and act like a normal person?

 

[MC Gas Money]

Sweet j

I know it was stupid

Ill talk to jamny when I need to. Im not sure how he even feels about me right now

 

[Sarnoff]

You should drink a lot of alcohol and consider doing some strong drugs. All great writers have done this.

I have made a similar suggestion. Only sans alcohol.

Ive got that covered but no drugs man. I put that stuff behind me

That's unfortunate. Where would a sober Hunter S Thompson be? Who would read that? Time to start the drugs again.

I know of no writer who was better after giving up drugs. Every one got worse the fewer drugs he did.

 

[MC Gas Money]

This is great.

Years ago you claimed you had sex with your mom and you needed help with writing song lyrics. Now you're claiming some mental disorder and asking for help with writing a book.

Heroin addiction.

Alcohol addiction.

Needed alcohol to have sex with the fat girl.

All stories you have tried.

Jason, when do you plan to stop with the fishing and act like a normal person?

Dude just cut it out please. I am going to write the book. I wasnt fishing with the drawings was I? I never go on fishing trips, this is all serious

 

[McGarnicle]

If the book is as stupid as this thread, who knows. Americans are pretty dumb.

 

[Sweet J]

This is great.

Years ago you claimed you had sex with your mom and you needed help with writing song lyrics. Now you're claiming some mental disorder and asking for help with writing a book.

Heroin addiction.

Alcohol addiction.

Needed alcohol to have sex with the fat girl.

All stories you have tried.

Jason, when do you plan to stop with the fishing and act like a normal person?

If they are interesting stories and fun to read, I'm not sure anyone cares if they are true. Of course, I haven't really followed these particular issues you mention. . . So I have no reference. I'm like a child who wanders into the middle of a movie and wants to know. . .

 

[MC Gas Money]

Im trying to turn over a new leaf, im trying to act normal and trying to do something productive with myself.

Please stop bringing up my past. I never lied about anything that happened to me so I dont want to be reminded. Just leave me be.

Im trying to do something good with my life and talents

 

[bluemagic]

This is great.

Years ago you claimed you had sex with your mom and you needed help with writing song lyrics. Now you're claiming some mental disorder and asking for help with writing a book.

Heroin addiction.

Alcohol addiction.

Needed alcohol to have sex with the fat girl.

All stories you have tried.

Jason, when do you plan to stop with the fishing and act like a normal person?

Dude just cut it out please. I am going to write the book. I wasnt fishing with the drawings was I? I never go on fishing trips, this is all serious

You've been fishing since day 1. You planned on writing songs about your anguish with having sex with your mom. You planned on drawing people in some sort of cathartic apology for the world doing you wrong. Days later, you suddenly have a book planned for years (that people you've talked to like yet you have claimed you never talk to people because of your mental illness) that you want help with.

You're still getting gratification from those that coddle or nurture you in your weird homosexual internet fantasy.