NFL's oldest cheerleader arrested... (1 Viewer)

[Tom Servo]

Fantasycurse42 to the yellow courtesy phone.

Former Baltimore Ravens cheerleader Molly Shattuck, the estranged wife of former Constellation Energy CEO Mayo Shattuck, has been accused of performing oral sex on a 15-year-old boy whom she "spotted" on Instagram. Molly, 47, was indicted on nine counts in an ongoing investigation, including two counts of third-degree rape.

 

[Buddy Ball 2K3]

You fail at life

 

[fantasycurse42]

Would bang!!

 

[James Daulton]

Ravens = class

 

[wadegarrett]

Lucky kid.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Sounds like she really blew it.

 

[Brony]

If that's rape, where can I get one?

 

[Dentist]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

 

[Insein]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

In the butt.

 

[Fennis]

and me only on pinterest.

 

[Tom Servo]

You fail at life

Just relaying the story, Che.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

I don't think it is all that strange, while her age helps her talents in the bj department it works against her in the clam department

 

[Dentist]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

I don't think it is all that strange, while her age helps her talents in the bj department it works against her in the clam department

yeah but that kid probably doesn't know that.. he doesn't likely have those types of reps.

just seems odd to turn it down

 

[TenTimes]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

I don't think it is all that strange, while her age helps her talents in the bj department it works against her in the clam department

yeah but that kid probably doesn't know that.. he doesn't likely have those types of reps.

just seems odd to turn it down

Maybe he was considering the amount of jail time that would have added to his woman's punishment?

 

[McGarnicle]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

I don't think it is all that strange, while her age helps her talents in the bj department it works against her in the clam department

yeah but that kid probably doesn't know that.. he doesn't likely have those types of reps.

just seems odd to turn it down

Maybe he's getting lots of prime young tail at school and said meh, I'll let this old lady suck me off but that's it.

 

[fatness]

Fantasycurse42 to the yellow courtesy phone.

Former Baltimore Ravens cheerleader Molly Shattuck, the estranged wife of former Constellation Energy CEO Mayo Shattuck, has been accused of performing oral sex on a 15-year-old boy whom she "spotted" on Instagram. Molly, 47, was indicted on nine counts in an ongoing investigation, including two counts of third-degree rape.

The kid should've waited. In 10 years she'll be able to take her teeth out.

 

[shadyridr]

Ill pray for the victim

 

[cstu]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

I don't think it is all that strange, while her age helps her talents in the bj department it works against her in the clam department

yeah but that kid probably doesn't know that.. he doesn't likely have those types of reps.

just seems odd to turn it down

Maybe he's getting lots of prime young tail at school and said meh, I'll let this old lady suck me off but that's it.

Then I hate him.

 

[(HULK)]

15 year old me is confused by the laws that categorize this as rape.

Heck, even 37 year old me thinks its unfair.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

so he took all the BJ's but turned down the actual secks?

strange.. but overall lucky kid

admittedly, I wonder where you go when you're a 15 y.o. kid after you've gotten sucked off by a 47 y.o. cheerleader.... I mean you're not going to get that kind of experience and talent out of your next 16 y.o. girlfriend

I don't think it is all that strange, while her age helps her talents in the bj department it works against her in the clam department

yeah but that kid probably doesn't know that.. he doesn't likely have those types of reps.

just seems odd to turn it down

he is a 15 year old in the age of the internet, i'm sure he has at least viewed enough pictures to know to stay away from roast beef that old.

 

[TenTimes]

15 year old me is confused by the laws that categorize this as rape.

Heck, even 37 year old me thinks its unfair.

Agree. Is it the judicial system pretending that a 15 y/o boy consenting with a 47 year old lady is the same as a 15 y/o girl consenting with 47 y/o man? From what I remember the adults are punished pretty differently based on gender.

 

[Aerial Assault]

What a blown opportunity.

 

[George Jefferson Airplane]

This is a tough one to swallow.

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

Maybe he plans to run for president one day?

 

[Henry Ford]

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2014/11/former-ravens-cheerleader-rapes-15-year-old-she-met-on-instagram-internet-idiots-call-him-lucky.html

On this edition of “Unsanctioned Uses of Instagram“, former Ravens Cheerleader Molly Shattuck has been charged with six counts of sexual assault, including 2 counts of third-degree rape after investigators found that the 47-year-old contacted a 15-year-old through the service. She reached out to the boy, offering up her cell number and encouraging him to contact her. This led to multiple *ahem* “meetings” between the two, at least one of which involved Shattuck leaving her three children alone and unsupervised at a rented beach house while she met with the teen. She reportedly offered sex to the teen multiple times, though he apparently eventually realized how weird this whole thing is and cut off contact with Shattuck.

Word isn’t out yet on how this will affect her weird-### health and fitness business, or how it will affect her marriage with Mayo Shattuck III, one of the richest men in Baltimore, but as of press time, there is confirmation that a bunch of 35-year-old men wearing fedoras have responded to the article by chuckling, elbowing their buddy in the ribs, and muttering “Lucky kid, huh?” while their friends are all wondering why they still hang out with that ###hole.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Looks like this old gal is still full of spunk

 

[James Daulton]

Looks like this old gal is still full of spunk

 

[Mr. Cross]

I do not see the problem.

 

[Tom Servo]

I do not see the problem.

Wait, what?

 

[Guest]

When I was 15 I thought 30 was old, and 40 was ancient. I have since grown out of those thoughts.

 

[rockaction]

When I was 15 I thought 30 was old, and 40 was ancient. I have since grown out of those thoughts.

In a weird coincidence, I only realized those ages weren't ancient in a sexual way because of Priscilla Presley in Naked Gun. Well, and the Herman's Hermits song in the background, which says something also, I think.

True story.

 

[HellToupee]

Would bang!!

, the documents say that Shattuck performed oral sex on the boy and told him, "If he wanted to have sex, she would. The boy opted out. He decided to leave. At that point, she told him to come back later but he did not go backreally?

 

[Zow]

Go Cougars!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxGcNWVc8hE

 

[Zow]

Would bang!!

, the documents say that Shattuck performed oral sex on the boy and told him, "If he wanted to have sex, she would. The boy opted out. He decided to leave. At that point, she told him to come back later but he did not go backreally?

Meh, kid was probably so overwhelmed with emotion he didn't know what to do. Kids are stupid.

 

[jon_mx]

I can sleep better knowing these criminals are behind bars.

 

[matttyl]

combine the first letter of her last name with the last 3 letters.

 

[Brony]

combine the first letter of her last name with the last 3 letters.

When she was married to Mayo Shattuck, as a couple they were M&M Shat tuck. Now imagine that one of the shat some M&Ms. And then did a 'tuck' of some sort. Yeah... awesome!

 

[Leroy Hoard]

combine the first letter of her last name with the last 3 letters.

I take my hat off to you.

 

[matttyl]

What kind of name is "Mayo" anyway?

 

[Grace Under Pressure]

Would bang!!

, the documents say that Shattuck performed oral sex on the boy and told him, "If he wanted to have sex, she would. The boy opted out. He decided to leave. At that point, she told him to come back later but he did not go backreally?

Meh, kid was probably so overwhelmed with emotion he didn't know what to do. Kids are stupid.

I was stupid but would have had no problem banging the daylights out of a NFL cheerleader at 15 without any of the emotion that must have held the kid back. That part is weird. He met her willingly.

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2014/11/former-ravens-cheerleader-rapes-15-year-old-she-met-on-instagram-internet-idiots-call-him-lucky.html

On this edition of “Unsanctioned Uses of Instagram“, former Ravens Cheerleader Molly Shattuck has been charged with six counts of sexual assault, including 2 counts of third-degree rape after investigators found that the 47-year-old contacted a 15-year-old through the service. She reached out to the boy, offering up her cell number and encouraging him to contact her. This led to multiple *ahem* “meetings” between the two, at least one of which involved Shattuck leaving her three children alone and unsupervised at a rented beach house while she met with the teen. She reportedly offered sex to the teen multiple times, though he apparently eventually realized how weird this whole thing is and cut off contact with Shattuck.

Word isn’t out yet on how this will affect her weird-### health and fitness business, or how it will affect her marriage with Mayo Shattuck III, one of the richest men in Baltimore, but as of press time, there is confirmation that a bunch of 35-year-old men wearing fedoras have responded to the article by chuckling, elbowing their buddy in the ribs, and muttering “Lucky kid, huh?” while their friends are all wondering why they still hang out with that ###hole.

I'm 41, and it's a trilby.

 

[Black Box]

Would bang!!

, the documents say that Shattuck performed oral sex on the boy and told him, "If he wanted to have sex, she would. The boy opted out. He decided to leave. At that point, she told him to come back later but he did not go backreally?

Meh, kid was probably so overwhelmed with emotion he didn't know what to do. Kids are stupid.

I was stupid but would have had no problem banging the daylights out of a NFL cheerleader at 15 without any of the emotion that must have held the kid back. That part is weird. He met her willingly.

Ex-cheerleader or not, she is still old enough to be his mom.

 

[Fennis]

combine the first letter of her last name with the last 3 letters.

too bad her last name is Argosnal or Taohits

 

[IC FBGCav]

I don't think at 15 a 47 year old would be a great prize. They fall into the mom category. Now 25 or 30 is a different story.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Just to add a thought, there are 47 year olds with grandkids about 15 years old.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

We call them GILFs Leroy

 

[Leroy Hoard]

We call them GILFs Leroy

I called one once: http://i.ytimg.com/vi/g1a86AdMdUo/hqdefault.jpg

 

[Fennis]

Just to add a thought, there are 47 year olds with grandkids about 15 years old.

or great-grand kids that are 2 years old.

 

[Premier]

Please make sure you look at the picture:

http://kissingsuzykolber.uproxx.com/2014/11/goodell-vows-to-use-any-means-necessary-to-track-down-and-view-video-evidence-related-to-former-ravens-cheerleader-sex-scandal.html

 

[Brony]

Thank you God