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Scary Story For My Son's Birthday Party (1 Viewer)

chet

chet

Footballguy
My son's having some friends sleep over for his 10th birthday party later this week, and he's requested a scary story. Anyone have any best practices? I told one last year off the top of my head that was OK but I want this one to be better.

 
Tell them that you are broke and that this is the last time they will all see each other because you are moving to government assisted housing.

 
There was a thread once upon a time started by The Man In The Yellow Hat about a camping trip...the Search Function is your friend.

IIRC - that was pretty scary for all parties involved.

 
Tell those boys to gather a little closer... a little closer... c'mon a little closer.... as you tell them a story about your mentor, Jerry Sandusky.

 
Tell them about a 19 year old guy that got in all kinds of trouble because a girl lied to him. Never too young to learn.

 
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A YOUNG girl named Lisa often had to spend time alone at home at night, as her parents worked late. They bought her a dog to keep her company and protect her. The dog slept under her bed at night.

One night Lisa was awakened by a dripping sound. She got up and went to the kitchen to turn off the tap properly. As she was getting back into the bed she stuck her hand under the bed, and the dog licked it.

The dripping sound continued, so she went to the bathroom and made sure the tap was turned off there, too.

She went back to her bedroom and stuck her hand under the bed, and the dog licked it again.
But the dripping continued, so she went outside and turned off all the faucets out there. She came back to bed, stuck her hand under it, and the dog licked it again.

The dripping continued: drip, drip, drip. This time she listened and located the source of the dripping — it was coming from her closet! She opened the closet door, and there found her poor dog hanging upside down with its neck cut.

 
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I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
 
About 8 weeks ago, I dropped my car off because the seats were malfunctioning. I just picked the car up again today. In the 8 weeks, it was released 4 times (including today) only to have the same problem resurface almost immediately the first 3 times. The first time, they replaced the pump; the second time, driver seat bladder; the third time, the passenger seat bladder; and the fourth time, apparently a pin was loose in one of the connections. It was all covered by warranty but took much longer than it should have IMO and they were sloppy.

I like my service advisor and have voiced my concerns to him. He suggested I drive the car for the next several days to ensure the problem is solved and then he will talk to the facility manager.
 
I relied heavily on FBG projections and software this year in both of my leagues. The Rate My Team feature had me as odds on favorite in both leagues. I am the only FBG subscriber in either league.

I am well on the way to having the low score in both leagues. How can they be so bad?

 
Tell them the story about a friend who mooched off of you, but then tried to gouge you on Kentucky Derby hotel room prices.

 
General Malaise said:
I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
Click to expand...
:lol:

Next week I will be playing in that one again.

 
A lady orders dominos pizza for herself and the kids having a party upstairs.

The pizza guy delivers the pizza but it's not the actual pizza guy. It's the guy who murdered the pizza guy on the way to the house!

You can take it from there....

Have him have sexy time with the lady, murder the kids, whatever floats your boat I guess.

 
chet said:
General Malaise said:
I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
Click to expand...
:lol:

Next week I will be playing in that one again.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

I still don't get what the problem was. I don't golf much. :bag:

 
General Malaise said:
chet said:
General Malaise said:
I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
Click to expand...
:lol:

Next week I will be playing in that one again.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

I still don't get what the problem was. I don't golf much. :bag:
Click to expand...
Guy was a complete ####### and I called him on it.

 
chet said:
General Malaise said:
chet said:
General Malaise said:
I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
Click to expand...
:lol:

Next week I will be playing in that one again.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

I still don't get what the problem was. I don't golf much. :bag:
Click to expand...
Guy was a complete ####### and I called him on it.
Click to expand...
You pick up, you lose the hole. It sounds like he went too far but he was right.

 
Willie Neslon said:
chet said:
General Malaise said:
chet said:
General Malaise said:
I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
Click to expand...
:lol:

Next week I will be playing in that one again.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

I still don't get what the problem was. I don't golf much. :bag:
Click to expand...
Guy was a complete ####### and I called him on it.
Click to expand...
You pick up, you lose the hole. It sounds like he went too far but he was right.
Click to expand...
Guy told him he got a 5, though. That's pretty much giving him the putt.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
TheIronSheik said:
Willie Neslon said:
chet said:
General Malaise said:
chet said:
General Malaise said:
I played in the member/guest tournament at my club and the following situation ensued.

I had a 6 foot putt for par on the second hole. My opponent (Don--the other member) was already in for par and the two guests were out of the hole. I missed my putt and picked up my ball and Don said, "You got a 5 and I got a 4."

As we were driving up to the next hole, he was out of his cart waiting for us and before we stopped, he was pointing and yelling at us. "You got a stroke on that hole. I didn't give you that putt. You lost the hole."

I told him to stop yelling and pointing and also to stop cross examining us. I explained that I didn't know I got a stroke and that had I known, I'd have tapped in. I also added that he gave us a 5 on the hole. He continued yelling and accusing and I told him that I'd ask the golf director what we should do.

At the next hole, he again approached us and said very aggresively, "I apologize. You didn't get a stroke on the hole. I gave you a 5 and you still lost." I didn't respond and simply continued with the game.

A couple of holes later, he tried to make small talk. I looked at him and said, "Don, I don't appreciate how you handled the situation. None of my friends would have handled it remotely closely to how you did. I don't have any respect for you. I don't like you. I don't want to talk to you ever again unless it's directly related to the match at hand."

He looked at me and said, "Well that's very rude. I apologized."

I responded with, "You set the tone of this relationship and have been ruder than anyone I've ever met here. You didn't apologize for your behavior either. Like I said, I don't want to talk to you again."

He comes back with, "Well, you guys are cheaters."
Click to expand...
:lol:

Next week I will be playing in that one again.
Click to expand...
:lmao:

I still don't get what the problem was. I don't golf much. :bag:
Click to expand...
Guy was a complete ####### and I called him on it.
Click to expand...
You pick up, you lose the hole. It sounds like he went too far but he was right.
Click to expand...
Guy told him he got a 5, though. That's pretty much giving him the putt.
Click to expand...
It isn't. You need to say "that's good" or physically pick up his ball and hand it to him for the putt to be good.

 
Have they seen the movie Scream? Just regurgitate that story. You can replace Scream with any othe horror movie. They're only 10 so there is a good chance that none of them have seen Scream.

 
I once went out to the bar with my buddy and proceeded to get super smashed. It was not good. I remember swearing off alcohol the next day, but not because of alcohol.

It was a Tuesday or Wednesday evening. We went to a local sports bar. I proceeded to start hitting on this girl. My friend tells me that she was fairly attractive. He was sober and is extremely shy. So anyways I am giving this lady my best sales pitch to see if I can get her to buy something off the clearance rack. She invites me outside to have a smoke.

This is where the story takes a nice twist as this is really the last thing I remember in detail.

My buddy says I went out to the patio with her and proceeded to make fun of her for smoking. Which obviously ruined my chances with this young lady.

Not to worry (give the kids some hope like the hero may pull through) My arguing caught the eye of a fellow bar patron and we ended up talking. She was a tall lady and I ended up convincing her to come back to my place. I completely ditched my friend and jumped in this strangers car and raced home. (This is a great time to teach them a lesson, women are terrible drivers and you know don't drink and drive)

Anyway we made it home and got into my bed. I know your audience is young so I suggest you clean this up but use your best judgement.

Long story short we tried we tried making love like dogs usually do. Problem was this lady was too tall for me. Real hefty one she was. We tried but just couldn't. She ended up petting me politely and I passed out. It was awful.

The next morning my alarm rang and I got up and looked over. She was slumbering away, quite loudly, in fact. I also thought she must have been cold because she had on a couple extra blankets.

I hopped in the shower and got ready for work. As I got out of the shower I tried making as much noise as possible to wake her up. Finally, I had to wake her up. I gave her a few nudges and she growled her way back to life. She rolled out of bed and that is when I realized I had slept with an unholy beast of a woman.

I have no shame but this troll was a new low. She was not hiding extra blankets, it was all her. I am not in shape by any means, but she was full. I had to reconsider my life as I went to work. It was not pretty. To this day I'm pretty sure she stole my iPad charger.

So you see chet, there are horror stories and whore stories.

 
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