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The Manchurian Quarterback (1 Viewer)

EmpireMaker

Footballguy
The Manchurian Quarterback

As the title implies, this QB was bred and raised to be a top NFL quarterback, no matter what the cost. His father was a QB, his brothers are QB’s. His mission: to win a NFL title that his father never achieved.

Peyton Manning is a robotic quarterback with no personality and no apparent desire to have any fun. His words to the media are always the perfectly scripted clichés. He plays the game with an uncanny mechanical style; that is, with no style.

His off the field behavior is normal and boring. He does all of the approved, scripted, do-gooder acts of donating to poor, helping the community, and all of the other nice things that people with his kind of money are supposed to do. And he gets plenty of coverage for it. He doesn’t do much else outside of football.

He’s too socially inept to realize that his commercials condescending the little guys are patronizing and offensive to all of the working class. He’s nauseatingly and unrealistically polite, except when accusing his kicker Vanderjerk of getting “liquored up and running off his mouth,” an act he strictly disapproves of.

Like the name implies, the Manchurian QB is the unwitting center of a conspiracy to vault him into a Superbowl title, Hall of Fame career, and possible Senatorial campaign. He does what he’s brainwashed to do: study football, play football, and try his best to win games.

Some NFL officials are obviously part of the plot. How else can you explain the overturned interception by Polamalu against the Colts? The horrific replay call resulted in a robotic TD drive by Manning, including a 2 point conversion, rather than the Steelers running out most of the clock. The game might have ended up in OT if Vanderjackass had made his field goal.

The NFL continues to bend its will toward crowning Manning with a Superbowl and remarkable career that he has been brainwashed for his entire life. What they don’t realize is that you can’t manufacture a hero.

A hero is created by divine intervention: an unconventional renegade like Brett Favre; an unbelievable gunslinger like Dan Marino; a gangly, fast freak like Randy Moss; a devastatingly quick Barry Sanders or Mike Vick; a grocery store clerk that walks on to the NFL an unknown, only to win a Superbowl and MVP award.

A hero can not be created by an institution, a conspiracy, brainwashing, or any other artificial means. Fans are people, humans. They need a human connection. They want the man that’s flawed like they are, and yet has talent and drive, above and beyond. A people’s hero is the guy they can relate to, the guy they want to watch a football game, cook hamburgers, and drink a beer with.

The Manchurian Quarterback will never be the people’s hero.

http://ffreview.com/articles/manchurianqb.htm

 

Wilbur Wood

Footballguy
The Manchurian Quarterback

As the title implies, this QB was bred and raised to be a top NFL quarterback, no matter what the cost. His father was a QB, his brothers are QB’s. His mission: to win a NFL title that his father never achieved.

Peyton Manning is a robotic quarterback with no personality and no apparent desire to have any fun. His words to the media are always the perfectly scripted clichés. He plays the game with an uncanny mechanical style; that is, with no style.

His off the field behavior is normal and boring. He does all of the approved, scripted, do-gooder acts of donating to poor, helping the community, and all of the other nice things that people with his kind of money are supposed to do. And he gets plenty of coverage for it. He doesn’t do much else outside of football.

He’s too socially inept to realize that his commercials condescending the little guys are patronizing and offensive to all of the working class. He’s nauseatingly and unrealistically polite, except when accusing his kicker Vanderjerk of getting “liquored up and running off his mouth,” an act he strictly disapproves of.

Like the name implies, the Manchurian QB is the unwitting center of a conspiracy to vault him into a Superbowl title, Hall of Fame career, and possible Senatorial campaign. He does what he’s brainwashed to do: study football, play football, and try his best to win games.

Some NFL officials are obviously part of the plot. How else can you explain the overturned interception by Polamalu against the Colts? The horrific replay call resulted in a robotic TD drive by Manning, including a 2 point conversion, rather than the Steelers running out most of the clock. The game might have ended up in OT if Vanderjackass had made his field goal.

The NFL continues to bend its will toward crowning Manning with a Superbowl and remarkable career that he has been brainwashed for his entire life. What they don’t realize is that you can’t manufacture a hero.

A hero is created by divine intervention: an unconventional renegade like Brett Favre; an unbelievable gunslinger like Dan Marino; a gangly, fast freak like Randy Moss; a devastatingly quick Barry Sanders or Mike Vick; a grocery store clerk that walks on to the NFL an unknown, only to win a Superbowl and MVP award.

A hero can not be created by an institution, a conspiracy, brainwashing, or any other artificial means. Fans are people, humans. They need a human connection. They want the man that’s flawed like they are, and yet has talent and drive, above and beyond. A people’s hero is the guy they can relate to, the guy they want to watch a football game, cook hamburgers, and drink a beer with.

The Manchurian Quarterback will never be the people’s hero.

http://ffreview.com/articles/manchurianqb.htm
On the other hand a similar lab experiment turned out Todd Marinovich.
 

Facenda's Voice

Footballguy
I'll be glad when most of the talk in this forum is about the draft and other meaningful football news. How many Manning or Colts choke threads, conspiracy theories, and hate threads do we have to get out of our system before the fun stuff comes back to this forum?

 

EmpireMaker

Footballguy
manchurianqb.jpg


It's just a parody / allegory. I'm trying to have some fun here. Lighten up, will ya?

;)

 

PatsFanCT

Footballguy
A hero is created by divine intervention: an unconventional renegade like Brett Favre; an unbelievable gunslinger like Dan Marino; a gangly, fast freak like Randy Moss; a devastatingly quick Barry Sanders or Mike Vick; a grocery store clerk that walks on to the NFL an unknown, only to win a Superbowl and MVP award.

http://ffreview.com/articles/manchurianqb.htm
And, as anyone in the New England area Saturday night can attest, can make hell freeze over just by losing a playoff game.
 

Fear & Loathing

Footballguy
I'll be glad when most of the talk in this forum is about the draft and other meaningful football news. How many Manning or Colts choke threads, conspiracy theories, and hate threads do we have to get out of our system before the fun stuff comes back to this forum?
Yukon: Fog's as thick as peanut butter.Hermey: You mean "pea soup."

Yukon: You eat what you like, and I'll eat what I like!

I thought that article was one of the most fun items I've read on this forum. It was creative. It was funny.

You eat your Facenda, and stats and draft projections. I'll eat my witty articles about a QB who can do no wrong in so many peoples' eyes.

 

Sinrman

Footballguy
The Manchurian Quarterback

As the title implies, this QB was bred and raised to be a top NFL quarterback, no matter what the cost. His father was a QB, his brothers are QB’s. His mission: to win a NFL title that his father never achieved.

Peyton Manning is a robotic quarterback with no personality and no apparent desire to have any fun. His words to the media are always the perfectly scripted clichés. He plays the game with an uncanny mechanical style; that is, with no style. 

His off the field behavior is normal and boring. He does all of the approved, scripted, do-gooder acts of donating to poor, helping the community, and all of the other nice things that people with his kind of money are supposed to do. And he gets plenty of coverage for it. He doesn’t do much else outside of football.

He’s too socially inept to realize that his commercials condescending the little guys are patronizing and offensive to all of the working class. He’s nauseatingly and unrealistically polite, except when accusing his kicker Vanderjerk of getting “liquored up and running off his mouth,” an act he strictly disapproves of.

Like the name implies, the Manchurian QB is the unwitting center of a conspiracy to vault him into a Superbowl title, Hall of Fame career, and possible Senatorial campaign. He does what he’s brainwashed to do: study football, play football, and try his best to win games.

Some NFL officials are obviously part of the plot. How else can you explain the overturned interception by Polamalu against the Colts? The horrific replay call resulted in a robotic TD drive by Manning, including a 2 point conversion, rather than the Steelers running out most of the clock. The game might have ended up in OT if Vanderjackass had made his field goal.

The NFL continues to bend its will toward crowning Manning with a Superbowl and remarkable career that he has been brainwashed for his entire life. What they don’t realize is that you can’t manufacture a hero.

A hero is created by divine intervention: an unconventional renegade like Brett Favre; an unbelievable gunslinger like Dan Marino; a gangly, fast freak like Randy Moss; a devastatingly quick Barry Sanders or Mike Vick; a grocery store clerk that walks on to the NFL an unknown, only to win a Superbowl and MVP award.

A hero can not be created by an institution, a conspiracy, brainwashing, or any other artificial means. Fans are people, humans. They need a human connection. They want the man that’s flawed like they are, and yet has talent and drive, above and beyond. A people’s hero is the guy they can relate to, the guy they want to watch a football game, cook hamburgers, and drink a beer with.

The Manchurian Quarterback will never be the people’s hero.

http://ffreview.com/articles/manchurianqb.htm
On the other hand a similar lab experiment turned out Todd Marinovich.
:lmao: :lmao: :lmao: That whole artcile deflated by one simple sentence...

 

jeff_eaglz

Moderator
The Manchurian Quarterback

As the title implies, this QB was bred and raised to be a top NFL quarterback, no matter what the cost. His father was a QB, his brothers are QB’s. His mission: to win a NFL title that his father never achieved.

Peyton Manning is a robotic quarterback with no personality and no apparent desire to have any fun. His words to the media are always the perfectly scripted clichés. He plays the game with an uncanny mechanical style; that is, with no style.

His off the field behavior is normal and boring. He does all of the approved, scripted, do-gooder acts of donating to poor, helping the community, and all of the other nice things that people with his kind of money are supposed to do. And he gets plenty of coverage for it. He doesn’t do much else outside of football.

He’s too socially inept to realize that his commercials condescending the little guys are patronizing and offensive to all of the working class. He’s nauseatingly and unrealistically polite, except when accusing his kicker Vanderjerk of getting “liquored up and running off his mouth,” an act he strictly disapproves of.

Like the name implies, the Manchurian QB is the unwitting center of a conspiracy to vault him into a Superbowl title, Hall of Fame career, and possible Senatorial campaign. He does what he’s brainwashed to do: study football, play football, and try his best to win games.

Some NFL officials are obviously part of the plot. How else can you explain the overturned interception by Polamalu against the Colts? The horrific replay call resulted in a robotic TD drive by Manning, including a 2 point conversion, rather than the Steelers running out most of the clock. The game might have ended up in OT if Vanderjackass had made his field goal.

The NFL continues to bend its will toward crowning Manning with a Superbowl and remarkable career that he has been brainwashed for his entire life. What they don’t realize is that you can’t manufacture a hero.

A hero is created by divine intervention: an unconventional renegade like Brett Favre; an unbelievable gunslinger like Dan Marino; a gangly, fast freak like Randy Moss; a devastatingly quick Barry Sanders or Mike Vick; a grocery store clerk that walks on to the NFL an unknown, only to win a Superbowl and MVP award.

A hero can not be created by an institution, a conspiracy, brainwashing, or any other artificial means. Fans are people, humans. They need a human connection. They want the man that’s flawed like they are, and yet has talent and drive, above and beyond. A people’s hero is the guy they can relate to, the guy they want to watch a football game, cook hamburgers, and drink a beer with.

The Manchurian Quarterback will never be the people’s hero.

http://ffreview.com/articles/manchurianqb.htm
On the other hand a similar lab experiment turned out Todd Marinovich.
:goodposting: you beat me to it. I was thinking of him the whole way through....
 

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