United Airlines.. ruining vacations step by step- ama (1 Viewer)

[El Floppo]

Never had a problem with them before. 

flew from NYC to SF a few days ago... Their crew didn't show up. We waited at Newark for four hours, after choosing an earlish flight so we'd have the afternoon out there. 

Now we're on our way from SF to HI, taxiid out and now taxiing back because of a water leak in the galley. I'm assuming we're not going anywhere tonight. Our short vacation getting ####ed step by step by United.

Plus, both full flights and the seat structure/posts makes it so there's nowhere for your legs. It's as if they laid out as many seats as inhumanly possible and forgot where or how to connect them to the plane. #### it! People don't need that leg/footroom, their knees are already rammed into the seatbacks and fat asses squeezed between the armrests.

Sitting jammed in the plane at the gate waiting for a mechanic to get on board. 

Ask me whatever the #### you want and I'll be pissed off either way.

Look at me! I'm not flying in lolchet class 

 

[ChiefD]

Never had a problem with them before. 

flew from NYC to SF a few days ago... Their crew didn't show up. We waited at Newark for four hours, after choosing an earlish flight so we'd have the afternoon out there. 

Now we're on our way from SF to HI, taxiid out and now taxiing back because of a water leak in the galley. I'm assuming we're not going anywhere tonight. Our short vacation getting ####ed step by step by United.

Plus, both full flights and the seat structure/posts makes it so there's nowhere for your legs. It's as if they laid out as many seats as inhumanly possible and forgot where or how to connect them to the plane. #### it! People don't need that leg/footroom, their knees are already rammed into the seatbacks and fat asses squeezed between the armrests.

Sitting jammed in the plane at the gate waiting for a mechanic to get on board. 

Ask me whatever the #### you want and I'll be pissed off either way.

Look at me! I'm not flying in lolchet class 

Is the aisle wet and bumpy?

 

[El Floppo]

Is the aisle wet and bumpy?

I will stab you with a vuvuzela

 

[Ron Swanson]

Feel for you.  I flew Continental for years religiously.  Then United happened. Ooof.  Exactly like you are experiencing. Mismanagement on top of mismanagement.  They left me stranded multiple times overnight 2 years ago.  Haven't flown them since.

But since we're asking questions, do you think that beefy flatulence is coming from the rotund elderly woman in 13B or the vegan hippie in 14D?

 

[El Floppo]

Feel for you.  I flew Continental for years religiously.  Then United happened. Ooof.  Exactly like you are experiencing. Mismanagement on top of mismanagement.  They left me stranded multiple times overnight 2 years ago.  Haven't flown them since.

But since we're asking questions, do you think that beefy flatulence is coming from the rotund elderly woman in 13B or the vegan hippie in 14D?

Old Hawaiian dude sitting in 34g  behind me to my right. Came in screaming at "his lady" and the two of them have basically not let up. 

Or the old deaf chinese dude yelling in the seat right behind me. Same guy who seems to be trying to locate my spleen through the seat back while yelling in mandarin to his lady sitting 11 inches to his left.

 

[El Floppo]

Yes. This vacation is all kinds of awesome.

 

[zamboni]

Feel for you.  I flew Continental for years religiously.  Then United happened. Ooof.  

That’s exactly it - United sucks and they destroyed Continental. Know a few people who worked for Continental and they said the same. Sucks that they corner the market in Newark, NJ where I always fly from. 

Also have the most heinous and surly flight attendants. 

 

[Da Guru]

Never had a problem with them before. 

flew from NYC to SF a few days ago... Their crew didn't show up. We waited at Newark for four hours, after choosing an earlish flight so we'd have the afternoon out there. 

Now we're on our way from SF to HI, taxiid out and now taxiing back because of a water leak in the galley. I'm assuming we're not going anywhere tonight. Our short vacation getting ####ed step by step by United.

Plus, both full flights and the seat structure/posts makes it so there's nowhere for your legs. It's as if they laid out as many seats as inhumanly possible and forgot where or how to connect them to the plane. #### it! People don't need that leg/footroom, their knees are already rammed into the seatbacks and fat asses squeezed between the armrests.

Sitting jammed in the plane at the gate waiting for a mechanic to get on board. 

Ask me whatever the #### you want and I'll be pissed off either way.

Look at me! I'm not flying in lolchet class 

Want a vacation screwed up? Try flying Spirit...

 

[El Floppo]

That’s exactly it - United sucks and they destroyed Continental. Know a few people who worked for Continental and they said the same. Sucks that they corner the market in Newark, NJ where I always fly from. 

Also have the most heinous and surly flight  attendants. 

Fwiw, our flight attendants out here and now have all been really nice. 

But #### this.

 

[Osaurus]

Flying into Honolulu or somewhere else?

 

[Osaurus]

Fwiw, our flight attendants out here and now have all been really nice. 

But #### this.

What kind of scarves are they wearing?

 

[El Floppo]

What kind of scarves are they wearing?

Yeah. I ####### get it. Scarves. Harhar har.

 

[El Floppo]

Flying into Honolulu or somewhere else?

Hopefully.

They just announced 45 minutes to get this fixed.

Over/under...

 

[Osaurus]

Hopefully.

They just announced 45 minutes to get this fixed.

Over/under...

Hawaiian Airlines is worse.  Seriously.  No dixie cup of guava juice is gonna make those flights better.  Oof.

 

[El Floppo]

Hawaiian Airlines is worse.  Seriously.  No Dixie cup of guava juice is gonna makes those flights better.  Oof.

Flying the red eye back to NYC on Hawaiian, so I have that going for me.

Last time I flew them was for work, first class- it was great. Also 20 years ago.

Whoah...Chinese fella... That wasn't my spleen there.

 

[IMAX 3D]

What’s the temperature there?

 

[El Floppo]

How bags of free peanuts have you gorged on so far?

How? Free? Yeah...right.

 

[El Floppo]

What’s the temperature there?

Combo of sweaty balls and ####ed

 

[cockroach]

Do you get panic attacks?

OMG, what if you have a panic attack!!!!

What's that feeling in your head, are you having a stroke!?!?!?!? 

 

[Osaurus]

Flying the red eye back to NYC on Hawaiian, so I have that going for me.

Last time I flew them was for work, first class- it was great. Also 20 years ago.

Whoah...Chinese fella... That wasn't my spleen there.

My island hopping between BI, Oahu, and Kauai took 4x longer than it was supposed to.  Delayed 2 freakin hours out of Honolulu.  The poi was maginificent though.

 

[El Floppo]

Do you get panic attacks?

OMG, what if you have a panic attack!!!!

What's that feeling in your head, are you having a stroke!?!?!?!? 

I'd probably just marry gb furls.

 

[El Floppo]

Ok. Hawaiilan "old lady" standing with her ### in my face now.

Tropical

 

[Osaurus]

Mahalo #######

 

[El Floppo]

How bags of free peanuts have you gorged on so far?

No peanuts...but very generously offered half cups of water.

 

[El Floppo]

45 minutes.

What are the chances we even leave tonight.

 

[Osaurus]

45 minutes.

What are the chances we even leave tonight.

Just think of it as already being on island time.

 

[Ron Swanson]

45 minutes.

What are the chances we even leave tonight.

.12%

 

[El Floppo]

45 minutes.

What are the chances we even leave tonight.

Saying problem has been resolved and just having to go through paperwork..  another 15-20 minutes 

And there goes the crying baby.

United

 

[El Floppo]

Jfc.

Just now got a text from United telling me our flight is delayed.

Thanks for the update! 

 

[Osaurus]

Jfc.

Just now got a text from United telling me our flight is delayed.

Thanks for the update! 

Timely.

 

[comfortably numb]

Fondle your wife?

 

[IMAX 3D]

Do you have to poop?

 

[Osaurus]

Old Hawaiian dude sitting in 34g  behind me to my right. Came in screaming at "his lady" and the two of them have basically not let up. 

Or the old deaf chinese dude yelling in the seat right behind me. Same guy who seems to be trying to locate my spleen through the seat back while yelling in mandarin to his lady sitting 11 inches to his left.

 

[Galileo]

I flew United a couple weeks ago from Cleveland > Chicago > Seattle and then the return through Denver instead of Chicago.  Everything was great.  In fact we got to Seattle a little early and were right on time for the return to CLE.  Top notch experience.  I think the problem may be you, El Floppo.

Now, American on the other hand... 

 

[Angry Beavers]

Want a vacation screwed up? Try flying Spirit...

Spirit... never had any problems with them

Ask for free drinks #sharkmove

 

[saintfool]

we flew to costa rica on United a few years ago. we were AirBnB'ing in this remote part of the country and made arrangements with our host to catch a bus from the airport. the bus left daily only at this time. flight was delayed, of course, as we circled the Miami airport for the connecting flight. this delayed our arrival to CR and we missed the bus - despite customs which is normally a time sink - by about 10 minutes. we had to hire a driver to take us - like a 7 hour drive - to the town. 

there was the time that my ex-wife and i were leaving Peru and flying United. i was travelling a ton for work at the time and was like platinum diamond AAA status. they called me before the 12 hour flight to let me know that because of my preferred flyer status that i had been upgraded to first class. first class! my wife and i were thrilled!!! no, wait, it was just one seat upgrade? what do you mean you don't have 2 seats in FC available when you make this kind of offer? you know i'm married, right? i have to turn it down because i can't take a 12 hour flight in first class while my future ex-wife is stuck in economy.

 

[culdeus]

I'm gonna guess this is him

https://flightaware.com/live/flight/UAL1509/history/20180731/2355Z/KSFO/PHNL

 

[gianmarco]

Mahalo for nothing, United.

 

[Beef Ravioli]

In flight WiFi must be down also...I saw it coming! 

 

[Galileo]

there was the time that my ex-wife and i were leaving Peru and flying United. i was travelling a ton for work at the time and was like platinum diamond AAA status. they called me before the 12 hour flight to let me know that because of my preferred flyer status that i had been upgraded to first class. first class! my wife and i were thrilled!!! no, wait, it was just one seat upgrade? what do you mean you don't have 2 seats in FC available when you make this kind of offer? you know i'm married, right? i have to turn it down because i can't take a 12 hour flight in first class while my future ex-wife is stuck in economy.

LINK

 

[Dickie Dunn]

Want a vacation screwed up? Try flying Spirit...

I vowed never to fly Spirit again but when AA tried to screw up my Vegas trip for March Madness by cancelling a flight because of snow two days ahead of time, Spirit came to the rescue and got us there non-stop.

 

[Zegras11]

How do you fly to Hawaii and not pay for internet so you can keep us updated?

United sucks balls so hard. Had major issues with them twice last year.  To Hawaii and the other from Tulsa to Boise.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

the other from Tulsa to Boise.

I don't think the airline can fix this.

 

[zoonation]

Flying that long in cattle is inhumane. 

 

[Hastur]

I can say I was on an American Airlines flight in Chicago(O'Hare) about 8 hours ago.  A United flight was on the tarmack  surrounded by police and fire trucks.  Didn't look fun.

 

[James Daulton]

I'm watching the news and I haven't seen anything about a soccer loving New Yorker going bonkers on a flight to the Hawaii.  So I'm assuming they were able to restrain Floppo pretty quickly and keep his psychotic outburst on the downlow. 

 

[El Floppo]

I'm going to need recs for a cheap bail-bondsman here. 

TIA

Old chines dude had his feet bare and digging into my innards through the seatback all flight. 

Hawain dude had his old lady read to him out loud, emphasis on the loud. Louder than my crap headphones. All members of both parties used my seat back and arm rest for some form of geriatric calisthenics.

United

 

[James Daulton]

Only 20 more minutes...

 

[John Bender]

Always go Jet Blue when possible. To me they are the best around. Free internet that actually works, free entertainment and live TV on every seatback even for short flights. 

What feels like much roomier seats than other airlines. 

 

[stbugs]

we flew to costa rica on United a few years ago. we were AirBnB'ing in this remote part of the country and made arrangements with our host to catch a bus from the airport. the bus left daily only at this time. flight was delayed, of course, as we circled the Miami airport for the connecting flight. this delayed our arrival to CR and we missed the bus - despite customs which is normally a time sink - by about 10 minutes. we had to hire a driver to take us - like a 7 hour drive - to the town. 

there was the time that my ex-wife and i were leaving Peru and flying United. i was travelling a ton for work at the time and was like platinum diamond AAA status. they called me before the 12 hour flight to let me know that because of my preferred flyer status that i had been upgraded to first class. first class! my wife and i were thrilled!!! no, wait, it was just one seat upgrade? what do you mean you don't have 2 seats in FC available when you make this kind of offer? you know i'm married, right? i have to turn it down because i can't take a 12 hour flight in first class while my future ex-wife is stuck in economy.

Turned it down? Why? No chance my wife or I would have turned that down. I’d rather she enjoy it or vice versa. 12 hour flight and we wouldn’t need to be cramped together. Heck if she’s in the middle (I love the aisle, so usually what we do if we fly together) and no new passengers you both get more room. Maybe if you let her sit in first it might not have gone down hill from there.