Who steals sausage biscuits? (1 Viewer)

[chauncey]

So I stopped at McDonald's this morning because I wasn't really sure if I should be driving and I was hungry. Order a bacon egg and cheese biscuit, sausage biscuit, hash browns, and coke. I sit at a table next to some dirty hippy/drifter looking kids. I'm minding my own business, eating this breakfast of kings and looking at my phone. I decide to go purchase some buffalo sauce for the sausage biscuit. When I return to my table the sausage biscuit has disappeared!

I ask the hippy girl if she saw what happened, she plays dumb. Her two hippy chick friends have snuck off to the bathroom. An old (60ish?) Hispanic lady is at the next table over, watching me. I look her in the eye trying to determine if she is the thief, she doesn't flinch. I go to the employees, all of whom look like they are 13 yr old, and they think I'm drunk/making #### up. The manager goes and checks the security cameras (2 right above my table) and says they are not aimed at my table, of course.

I need the ffa's help in solving this mystery of the missing sausage biscuit. Did the hippie/drifter chicks take it to the bathroom and scarf it down? Did the old lady stick it in her purse? I am so drunk I ate the sausage biscuit and didn't realize it?

 

[TLEF316]

I woukd. They're freaking delicious

 

[Limp Ditka]

People that take advantage of idiots who leave their food unattended while in public?

 

[Limp Ditka]

I woukd. They're freaking delicious

I'd probably leave it, not a McD sausage fan. A steak McMuffin wouldn't have stood a chance

 

[Ghost Rider]

People that take advantage of idiots who leave their food unattended while in public?

This reminds of women who go out and leave the purses at tables unattended for long lengths of time, whether it be at weddings, bar, etc.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Was it Unialias?

 

[Quint]

should have gone McGriddle. nobody steals McGriddles.

 

[pollardsvision]

should have gone McGriddle. nobody steals McGriddles.

I'd imagine a McGriddle can get a man shot in some parts.

 

[pollardsvision]

So I stopped at McDonald's this morning because I wasn't really sure if I should be driving and I was hungry. Order a bacon egg and cheese biscuit, sausage biscuit, hash browns, and coke. I sit at a table next to some dirty hippy/drifter looking kids. I'm minding my own business, eating this breakfast of kings and looking at my phone. I decide to go purchase some buffalo sauce for the sausage biscuit. When I return to my table the sausage biscuit has disappeared!

I ask the hippy girl if she saw what happened, she plays dumb. Her two hippy chick friends have snuck off to the bathroom. An old (60ish?) Hispanic lady is at the next table over, watching me. I look her in the eye trying to determine if she is the thief, she doesn't flinch. I go to the employees, all of whom look like they are 13 yr old, and they think I'm drunk/making #### up. The manager goes and checks the security cameras (2 right above my table) and says they are not aimed at my table, of course.

I need the ffa's help in solving this mystery of the missing sausage biscuit. Did the hippie/drifter chicks take it to the bathroom and scarf it down? Did the old lady stick it in her purse? I am so drunk I ate the sausage biscuit and didn't realize it?

It was the old lady. This ain't her first rodeo. She's not going to give it away when you look at her like some young punk.

 

[ROCKET]

I would have just spit in it and left it for you when you got back.

 

[peaces]

They did you a favor

 

[Das Boot]

You should have subtly nodded toward the kids while looking at the old lady. She would have subtly nodded back confirming your suspicions.

 

[Christo]

The hippies, Hispanic woman and manager were all in it together. You're lucky you made it out alive.

 

[matuski]

I steal sausage biscuits all the time. This isn't normal?

 

[pollardsvision]

You should have subtly nodded toward the kids while looking at the old lady. She would have subtly nodded back confirming your suspicions.

She's no snitch.

 

[loser]

LET'S GO TO THE TAPE!

 

[Mario Kart]

I would have stormed out of there while throwing pennies at all of them. You don't touch another man's food.

As an alternative, if you think you might have eaten it, then you need to check your bowel movements. Case will be either solved or a new mystery will develop. You will either eliminate yourself as a suspect or conclude that you are the suspect.

 

[Hot Diggity Dog]

You should have subtly nodded toward the kids while looking at the old lady. She would have subtly nodded back confirming your suspicions.

She's no snitch.

Snitches be #####es.

 

[Das Boot]

You should have subtly nodded toward the kids while looking at the old lady. She would have subtly nodded back confirming your suspicions.

She's no snitch.

I think she was an undercover cop that couldn't blow her cover.

However her keen sense of justice would have compelled her to verify the hippy kid's guilt via a nearly imperceptible nod coupled with direct eye contact.

 

[Donny Loved Bowling]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?

That's the real crime.

 

[Doctor Detroit]

You should have subtly nodded toward the kids while looking at the old lady. She would have subtly nodded back confirming your suspicions.

She's no snitch.

Biscuit snitches get stitches

 

[McGarnicle]

I could see myself stealing a sausage biscuit.

 

[Doctor Detroit]

The part I like best is when you reported the alleged crime to the McDonalds staff. This way they won't be surprised when they get a grand jury subpoena to testify on what really happened.

 

[jon_mx]

So now when we see stickers poping up on every table at McDonalds which say "we are not responsible for unattended food items", we will know which fool was responsible for it.

 

[Raider Nation]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?

That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

 

[Cjw_55106]

Asking the workers to check the video? Really?

 

[gianmarco]

No chance they checked video instead of handing you a new sausage biscuit that costs them all of $.03 to make.

 

[chauncey]

I wanted to see the video so I could determine if the hippie chick was lying or maybe I just ate the sausage biscuit myself and didn't remember. I can't believe the manager actually went and looked at it, or at least pretended to look at it. If I was him I would have called the cops on my drunk ### but I suppose McD's is used to having drunk/crazy patrons. This location was right off an I-10 exit, if that helps.

 

[chauncey]

No chance they checked video instead of handing you a new sausage biscuit that costs them all of $.03 to make.

I bought a second $1 sausage biscuit. I was a little surprised he didn't offer a free one.

 

[chauncey]

Mickey Ds sells buffalo sauce ? WTF is all that aboot ?

For the nuggets I think. They charged me some amount less than $1 for two containers of the buffalo sauce. On principle I never get the sauce because it is ridiculous for a fast food place to nickel and dime you on condiments. If I had stuck to my principles this morning that sausage biscuit would have never went missing.

 

[Mr. Retukes]

Poor people.

 

[AAABatteries]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?

That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

You never drink a soda for breakfast?

 

[cstu]

They did you a favor

Exactly what I was going to post.

 

[cstu]

should have gone McGriddle. nobody steals McGriddles.

I'd imagine a McGriddle can get a man shot in some parts.

If it doesn't come with the necessary peripherals and accompaniments.

 

[Das Boot]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?

That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

He only ordered a Coke because McD's doesn't serve whiskey.

 

[Raider Nation]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?

That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

You never drink a soda for breakfast?

I couldn't even fathom it. The other stuff he ordered demands an orange juice.

 

[Tom Servo]

I would have just spit in it and left it for you when you got back.

Better yet, mark your territory by farting over your table.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

You never drink a soda for breakfast?

I couldn't even fathom it. The other stuff he ordered demands an orange juice.

:X

 

[Raider Nation]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

You never drink a soda for breakfast?

I couldn't even fathom it. The other stuff he ordered demands an orange juice.

:X

Coffee works too. But soda??

 

[Bucky86]

Adults still eat Mcdonalds? :X

 

[pollardsvision]

Mickey Ds sells buffalo sauce ? WTF is all that aboot ?

For the nuggets I think. They charged me some amount less than $1 for two containers of the buffalo sauce. On principle I never get the sauce because it is ridiculous for a fast food place to nickel and dime you on condiments. If I had stuck to my principles this morning that sausage biscuit would have never went missing.

Yep. Seen it a hundred times.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

You never drink a soda for breakfast?

I couldn't even fathom it. The other stuff he ordered demands an orange juice.

:X

Coffee works too. But soda??

Oddly enough, just about the only time I drink any kid of coke is when hungover and eating McDonalds breakfast

 

[mquinnjr]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?

That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

Our hero needed some caffeine for the second leg of the drunk drive home, and just preferred the cold stuff over some hot coffee.

 

[STEADYMOBBIN 22]

Mcdonalds and a coke is the breakfast of hangover champions. That soda is like the nectar of the gods.

 

[Peyton Marino]

exactly how hard did you go last night?

 

[AAABatteries]

Got to disagree with RN - nothing like some greasy McDonalds breakfast with one of their Coke's. It's great.

 

[Limp Ditka]

#teamcancerwater

 

[Christo]

Got to disagree with RN - nothing like some greasy McDonalds breakfast with one of their Coke's. It's great.

Yeah, a Coke always helps more than coffee when I'm hung over. It has the caffeine, sugar, and the bubbles help settle the stomach.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Buffalo sauce on a sausage biscuit?That's the real crime.

I couldn't get past ordering a Coke with breakfast. :X

You never drink a soda for breakfast?

I couldn't even fathom it. The other stuff he ordered demands an orange juice.

:X

Coffee works too. But soda??

The peppery fizz from a good coke helps clean the remaining crud from inside your morning-after mouth.

 

[urbanhack]

I assume the hippies were white? You mentioned the woman was Hispanic, so why no race reference on the hippies??