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Why do we protect our kids from seeing sex more than violence? (1 Viewer)

Captain Cranks

Footballguy
I was searching for a scary movie for me and my 11 year old to watch and as I was perusing the Parental Guidance sections on IMDB, I found that I was screening movies based on their sexual content and not their violent aspects .  I assume most people judge what's ok for their kids in this same way.  But why are we (society) so afraid of sex but ok with violence?  You'd think it would be the other way around.   

 
Could be the same reason we are more comfortable with our male and female kids punching each other than them being a little too close.

 
US was founded on religion. Religion still controls our politics. Politics control every facet of our society and culture.
We’d think that violence would violate those religious norms as well. 

I think it’s easier to explain violence to kids than it is to explain sex so we try to avoid those conversations.

 
We’d think that violence would violate those religious norms as well. 

I think it’s easier to explain violence to kids than it is to explain sex so we try to avoid those conversations.
One might think that, but then again the history of some religions is riddled with examples of the church as the source of, or inspiration for, violence

 
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Kid gets in a fight, it will hurt for a few days, but heal. 

Kid gets pregnant, this is life changing.
Yeah luckily violence in TV and movies is only showing a few punches and bruises and not guns, explosions and death.      Literally life changing.   

 
Why do we protect our kids from seeing sex more than violence?
You think it has to do with them learning about sex and then having an unwanted pregnancy?  Because they aren't aware of how that stuff works and would learn about it the first time in a movie?  You aren't connecting the thought with logic.  

 
Yeah luckily violence in TV and movies is only showing a few punches and bruises and not guns, explosions and death.      Literally life changing.   
Get with the program, ok?  I don't WANT my kids watching anything having to do with sex or violence but can only do so much.

 
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You think it has to do with them learning about sex and then having an unwanted pregnancy?  Because they aren't aware of how that stuff works and would learn about it the first time in a movie?  You aren't connecting the thought with logic.  
What does sex have to with young kids, yep, nothing.  While having some ideas about how to protect themselves when it comes to violence, ok.  But, both not for kids.

 
I think I've told this story in another thread. But, it's Friday, so I'll tell it again.

When I was 17, I asked my Dad to videotape the movie American Graffiti. Keep in mind that it was airing on regular tv (yes, I'm old. But not too old since vcr's were around). So, the movie was already censored for language and nudity. I went to watch it a couple of days later and realized that my Dad had paused the recording to cut out the scene where Toad and Debbie were making out in the back seat of the car. Unbeknownst to my Dad, the reason I needed him to record the movie was because I was having sex with a girl that night. 

 
What % of girls will go that route?  And that isn't a life changing moment, knowing you just stamped out a life?
Not enough considering how many kids are living below the poverty line.  How life changing is it to have a child you can't afford to raise financially or emotionally?

 
A movie that shows a knife or bullet through the chest is PG-13.
A movie that shows hands on or kissing a boob is rated R.
Our society is pretty weird. 

 
Watching Deadpool wihth my 14 year old, all the f-bombs and gory horrible violence. Guess which part was (by far) the worst, for both of us, sitting on the couch together?

Calendar Girl

 
My kids get more uncomfortable when a sexual scene comes on, not sure why. Maybe wired that way? They also don’t really like violent stuff either but not “embarrassed” by it like sex. Tried to watch Step Brothers with my 13 year old daughter and she freaked out when Ferrell put his junk on the drum kit. I thought it was hilarious, daughter scolded me and said that wasn’t her type of humor. Poor choice on my part I suppose. 

14 year old super horny me saw Risky Business in the theater with my mom!!! Didn’t know anything about it. That super hot train scene sex made me so uncomfortable I tried ti disappear in my seat. Mom didn’t seem to be fazed by it. Strange thing.

 
Watching Deadpool wihth my 14 year old, all the f-bombs and gory horrible violence. Guess which part was (by far) the worst, for both of us, sitting on the couch together?

Calendar Girl
I’m no prude but amazed when I hear from my 8 year old that kids in class saw that movie. No way I let my kids see that.

 
I'd say it's the capacity for what they can deal with. They've been conditioned to violence since they were toddlers. Cartoons are violent. Other kids will shove and push. They will have fights. By the time they're 11 they have a good understanding of violence, the pros and cons, what's too much and what's ok. 

Most do not have the understanding or capacity to understand sex because they have never experienced anything like that yet and still won't for a number of years. We as parents shield them from this things because out if context, it will completely confuse them and they might draw the wrong conclusions from it. Obviously as parents we help guide them through those topics but a 10 year old may hear you and not understand what you are telling them about the subject. They have a better capacity to understand when they get to 12 or older.

That's my take on it anyway. 

 
People are really weird about sex. Fathers often obsess about their daughters' sexual purity to a creepy degree, IMO. 

 
I don't get it either, but I have found that I seem to be in the minority.   Basically, it boils down to parents don't want to have any uncomfortable conversations with their kids.  

I am not even talking about sex scenes, but when I was doing the video store thing, I would get grilled all the time on if there were even boobs in a movie.  Wait, you are letting your 9 year old watch Hellraiser and Saw, but you care if they see a pair of ta-tas in the movie?

 
I'd say it's the capacity for what they can deal with. They've been conditioned to violence since they were toddlers. Cartoons are violent. Other kids will shove and push. They will have fights. By the time they're 11 they have a good understanding of violence, the pros and cons, what's too much and what's ok. 

Most do not have the understanding or capacity to understand sex because they have never experienced anything like that yet and still won't for a number of years. We as parents shield them from this things because out if context, it will completely confuse them and they might draw the wrong conclusions from it. Obviously as parents we help guide them through those topics but a 10 year old may hear you and not understand what you are telling them about the subject. They have a better capacity to understand when they get to 12 or older.

That's my take on it anyway. 
I just assume that if a kid is able to process what is right and wrong with a violent movie, they could do the same with some nudity.   I mean, in your example you are talking about the difference of a year or so.  

Plus, in my experience (like I posted above) parents weren't even asking about sex scenes - they wouldn't let the kid watch a movie if it had nudity in it.   

 
I just assume that if a kid is able to process what is right and wrong with a violent movie, they could do the same with some nudity.   I mean, in your example you are talking about the difference of a year or so.  

Plus, in my experience (like I posted above) parents weren't even asking about sex scenes - they wouldn't let the kid watch a movie if it had nudity in it.   
True. I guess that comes in to play with what we as adults think of nudity and a lot of the time we project what we know onto the kids when in reality they aren't thinking anything sexual about nudity. Usually though, movies with nudity have other content that may not be suitable for children so it just gets lumped in.

 
True. I guess that comes in to play with what we as adults think of nudity and a lot of the time we project what we know onto the kids when in reality they aren't thinking anything sexual about nudity. Usually though, movies with nudity have other content that may not be suitable for children so it just gets lumped in.
Fair point, but I guess that is where I would think that if a kid can handle all the violence, they could handle that, but it's mostly just the parents don't want to deal with it.  

Maybe I am just not thinking about many examples since we haven't dipped our toes into the R movies with the kid yet.  I think there has been a little bit of nudity and suggestive stuff in the pg-13 movies we watch - new and old (Grown Ups, nudity in 80s movies, etc. ).   Since the ratings board are prudes on sex too, I can't think of many R movies that a teen would want to watch that has an extensive or graphic sex scene in it.  

ETA:  I guess Deadpool is the main example so far?

 
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Haha asking myself this very question right now as I let me son watch stranger things for the very first time and I know there's a scene when the girl takes her shirt off with bra on that im worried about. 

 
People are really weird about sex. Fathers often obsess about their daughters' sexual purity to a creepy degree, IMO. 


I wouldn't say often but popular culture likes to suggest this.


Really? Read all the posts in this example from this week, right on this board. It's often and it's a deeply ingrained, weirdly accepted part of our society:

https://forums.footballguys.com/forum/topic/773341-daughter-has-a-boy-coming-over-today/

 
Really? Read all the posts in this example from this week, right on this board. It's often and it's a deeply ingrained, weirdly accepted part of our society:

https://forums.footballguys.com/forum/topic/773341-daughter-has-a-boy-coming-over-today/
Not sure then. I always took it as anecdotal because I've never seen anyone act that way in real life. I've only ever seen it depicted that way in TV and movies. Then with things on the internet as well it feels more like posting how we think we're supposed to as opposed to what we would actually do in real life.

 
Not sure then. I always took it as anecdotal because I've never seen anyone act that way in real life. I've only ever seen it depicted that way in TV and movies. Then with things on the internet as well it feels more like posting how we think we're supposed to as opposed to what we would actually do in real life.
That's totally possible. I doubt Otis is really planning to hang around with a shotgun when his daughter's future prom date shows up. You never know, I'm sure many of the posts were serious and they just see it as being protective (even though they'd never do it for a son). Just the fact that it's universally considered either funny or the expected thing to post in that thread shows the pervasiveness of it though. 

 
EYLive said:
A movie that shows a knife or bullet through the chest is PG-13.
A movie that shows hands on or kissing a boob is rated R.
Our society is pretty weird. 
You kiss boobs with your hands?   :confused:  

 
shadyridr said:
Haha asking myself this very question right now as I let me son watch stranger things for the very first time and I know there's a scene when the girl takes her shirt off with bra on that im worried about. 
Come on.  

 
shadyridr said:
Haha asking myself this very question right now as I let me son watch stranger things for the very first time and I know there's a scene when the girl takes her shirt off with bra on that im worried about. 
Imagine what happens when you guys go to the beach for the 1st time!

Lol...Im busting but i get what you mean. Thats the engrained shamefullness that people have been raised up in within our culture. 

 
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