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Wooing my neighbor: I came. I hugged. I wooed. Now moving on. (1 Viewer)

She did offer that she hoped it wasn't too much and she is just very physically affectionate. I told her it was most definitely not too much. She says it's kind of a delicate situation, being as she lives right next door and she didn't want to make things awkward. I agreed and said there was no awkwardness from my point of view, with which she agreed. --so
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This is an extraordinarily worrisome paragraph for me. You need to nip this in the bud. Why would it be awkward when you're trying to date her? There is nothing delicate about the situation.

You need to put your cards on the table now. You think she's great, you want to get to know her better and continue the hugging and more. You can be cute about it, you don't have to be scummy, but I do not like the above at all. 

 
bananafish said:
Good job.

It's a pretty awesome feeling when someone you like a lot clearly likes you back. 

Seems well played to me.
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Agreed, GB. And I know it seems junior high to most probably, but I haven't had this feeling a long damn time, even through dating several chicks. This one feels different. I'm not so naive to think this is THE ONE, but it's definitely different, and I, for one, welcome it. 

 
Nathan R. Jessep said:
:lol: I knew this was coming. I expect 2-3 more pages of it. 
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Im being 100% honest. I think going in for the kiss would have been a HUGE mistake when she was so vulnerable last night. But things are infringing on friend zone status. You are almost there. You need to let her know you would like to be more than that and take her on a simple date. Its not the end of the world. Just ask.

 
LongDuckDong said:
This is an extraordinarily worrisome paragraph for me. You need to nip this in the bud. Why would it be awkward when you're trying to date her? There is nothing delicate about the situation.

You need to put your cards on the table now. You think she's great, you want to get to know her better and continue the hugging and more. You can be cute about it, you don't have to be scummy, but I do not like the above at all. 
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Exactly the way I read it. Lay your cards on the table now.

 
Not gonna lie...I chubbed up a bit reading her texts. If I was getting those, I'd be expecting that she would be relieving that tension within the hour. 

 
Nathan R. Jessep said:
:hands out vomit bags in advance: 

NRJ: I vote no on inappropriate. I'm a fan of hugs

M: K me too.

NRJ: " :thumbup:  "

...random few messages over the span of 15 minutes or so...

M: so if you happen to "need something out of your truck" and feel like I a hug I will come hug you very quickly? Yes? Ok deal. 

M: it's just a rare one time request, bc I especially need one.

NRJ (grinning like the ####### Cheshire cat): Haha yes. Deal. When?

M: Now? Just tell me

NRJ: OK. Yep. 

My kids are still up, but making preparations for bed, but still milling around the house.  My son is doing his nightly routine of shooting a few free throws on the Nerf hoop after brushing his teeth, so he's making all kinds of racket inside. I slip out onto the porch, and she's headed towards my house, through the yard. She says "heyyyy" and I meet her at the bottom of my steps. She grabs my shoulders and pulls me in, pressing her chest against mine tightly, and wrapping her arms around me. So I wrap mine around her as well and we just stand there for about 30 seconds, not saying a word, just soaking it in. About that time, my son shot a brick apparently and it bounced off the window/blinds, and scared the #### out of Marissa and I. We both jumped, thinking we were busted, then we started laughing. She quickly turned and tiptoed back to her yard, and I went back in and got the kids in bed, and they were none the wiser. 

NRJ: Damn kids.

M: Lol. Good hug. Thank you.

NRJ: Agreed. And thank you. 

M: anytime!

....mostly randomness, but I did work in a "that was not my best hug effort" and she insisted she liked it regardless...

M: Well I desperately needed a hug

NRJ: *nods* I thought so

M: You needed one too you just didn't know it ;)  

NRJ: I think you may be right

....M explains why she needed a hug (I will not disclose why here), I say I understand and glad I was able to help her out...

M: Me too. You have to initiate the next one though.

NRJ: I pretty much initiated that one hours ago didn't I? ( :bowtie:  )

M: well sort of, but I came up with the plan to actually make it happen

NRJ: yes you did

NRJ: Perhaps, theoretically, say I left something ELSE in my truck and had to go get it in a little while?

M: LOL what is a little while?

NRJ: Any time between right now and when I (you) go to bed?

NRJ: I mean my schedule is pretty wide open from not to bedtime. 

NRJ: Theoretically

M: How about right now? 

NRJ: :yes:  

This time, I wait for her to come all the way to my porch. She greets me again, and she kind of slithered up next to me and slinked her arms around me and laid her head on my shoulder/neck area and just sighed a long deep breath. She seemed content. I was definitely content. On the offdee quivalent of a hugs scale, it was a 9.5. it definitely felt "right" and it definitely felt like more than a friendly hug. 

Now, I'm sure I just opened myself up for some laughs and critique of my replies, but I posted the texts above just to give you an idea of her personality that I've gotten to know and probably haven't conveyed through my posts. She's very quick-witted and funny and gives me #### right back if I give her ####. I dig that in a chick. We have played very well off of each other thus far, I think. 

She did offer that she hoped it wasn't too much and she is just very physically affectionate. I told her it was most definitely not too much. She says it's kind of a delicate situation, being as she lives right next door and she didn't want to make things awkward. I agreed and said there was no awkwardness from my point of view, with which she agreed. --so

basically she's on the same page I am, I feel. Just proceeding with extreme caution, which I am fine with. I'm being cautious as well. There's a lot at stake here for all involved.  

There has been discussion of said hug this morning, and the analysis is good. Early prognosis is also good for future endeavors. No specific plans made just yet, but I'd expect that to be in the mix very soon. 

I don't know where it'll end up, or how fast, but it's absolutely been a much-needed fun couple of weeks for me, so I look forward to what lies ahead. So I understand if anyone or everyone wants to tap out of this thread now, but I can guaran-### ####-tee you it's not a fishing trip.  I appreciate the advice (well, most of it) and well-wishes, and the entertainment you SOBs have provided. :thumbup:  

As you were, men (and women). 
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next step is insertion and cervix bouncing

 
LongDuckDong said:
This is an extraordinarily worrisome paragraph for me. You need to nip this in the bud. Why would it be awkward when you're trying to date her? There is nothing delicate about the situation.

You need to put your cards on the table now. You think she's great, you want to get to know her better and continue the hugging and more. You can be cute about it, you don't have to be scummy, but I do not like the above at all. 
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Yeah, I thought about this when I included this part. I knew someone would ask and give me a chance to explain. This is at least partly due to the information that I have from her that has not and won't be disclosed in this thread.  I will make my intentions known to her and leave no doubts. We are getting there. There is no immediate rush. Especially given the signs and interaction we've had thus far. This I am confident of. 

 
Baloney Sandwich said:
Half base?
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Northern Louisiana Bases:

1st Base: any part of your body touches any part of her body.  This could be anything from accidentally bumping into someone to playing footsie.

2nd Base: Brief hand touching.  This can be anything from a firm handshake to a high five to actually holding hands.

3rd Base: Hugs

Homerun: Kiss on the cheek

Grand Slam: French Kissing

///Anything else is reserved for marriage and only done through holes cut in sheets.

 
no clothing updates?

next time you go for the hug make sure you have some super thin shorts on so she can feel the kielbasa

 
shadyridr said:
Im being 100% honest. I think going in for the kiss would have been a HUGE mistake when she was so vulnerable last night. But things are infringing on friend zone status. You are almost there. You need to let her know you would like to be more than that and take her on a simple date. Its not the end of the world. Just ask.
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Oh I agree completely, as believe me the thought was crossing my mind as my heart was beating out of my chest and I could feel hers doing the same. It's coming. 

 
Ok, this is about wrapped up. I'll send you my address in a PM for my wedding invitation. I'll go chicken instead of steak please. Please also put me at [icon]'s table,  :thumbup:

 
The Hank said:
In football terms, I equate it to dropping a pass for a first down, but there was pass interference on the play. So he got the first down w/o the completion and moved the chains.
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Defensive offsides due to anticipation of an overly long snap count...

5 yards gifted to the offense.

Still only first down and the offense has yet to run a play. 

 
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Best of luck to you, NRJ!   I'd think it might be a good idea to remain up front and honest with her about your attraction to her that way you can hopefully stay on the same page.  I'm definitely rooting for you here!

Any idea on when you think you'll propose? (totally kidding!!)

 
Im all for the way you have been playing it, but reading those texts, she was almost pleading with you to do her no?

I mean that is the way I was reading it

 
basically she's on the same page I am, I feel. Just proceeding with extreme caution, which I am fine with. I'm being cautious as well. There's a lot at stake here for all involved.  
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I think you are greatly overrating this.

 
There's no reason to rush at this point.  There was actually no reason to rush even prior to the coffee date.  It would be very confusing for the kids to watch their parents blow through a few month relationship with the neighbor. 

It's going to be hard to pass up the temptation to move fast though.

 
Taking things at a comfortable pace is fine, but for God's sake she was looking for a kiss on that 2nd hug.  She's into you.  A kiss won't blow it.

A third hug will be really weird at this point.  Pick up the pace, Colonel.  Double-time it.

 
I don't know if you guys realize how many diseases can be passed through a kiss... and cooties. 

Our hero has to be sure before he lets his lips cross into that realm. 

 
pats3in4 said:
Taking things at a comfortable pace is fine, but for God's sake she was looking for a kiss on that 2nd hug.  She's into you.  A kiss won't blow it.

A third hug will be really weird at this point.  Pick up the pace, Colonel.  Double-time it.
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He played it right.  He has played it right the whole time (except for the awful matching hat and t-shirt).  Things move slower with kids involved and that's the way it should be.

 
M: Me too. You have to initiate the next one though.

....

M: How about right now? 
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Dude, you're still being way too passive.  She outright telling you she wants you to take charge and you're acting like a middle school kid.

 
(HULK) said:
Nathan R. Jessep said:
M: Me too. You have to initiate the next one though.
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Even SHE is telling you to get more assertive here.
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That was my feeling too.

I was ok with the slow/cautious play until hug #1 was just a hug and not a kiss or ask out/etc. At some point, the "we're neighbors" has to take a back seat. 

Not saying you have to jump into the sack right away, but you need to make a real move, Colonial. I'm not a woman, but I'm guessing the guy insisting "let's take this slow" becomes a bit of a turn off.  

 
I mean it's not like either of you have spouses, sleeping with your neighbor in that situation would be a big deal.  even if you have a physical relationship and break it off it's not the end of the world for you or your kids. I mean both of you were willing to do that with kids involved, and things seem fine.  

Proximity should be the least of the concern.  

Just lock up the fact that bio dad is at least out of the pictures insofar as ever moving in there, then get the green light.  

 
pats3in4 said:
Taking things at a comfortable pace is fine, but for God's sake she was looking for a kiss on that 2nd hug.  She's into you.  A kiss won't blow it.

A third hug will be really weird at this point.  Pick up the pace, Colonel.  Double-time it.
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I'm no master at reading women but seriously WTF?  Did you actually think she wanted two hugs back to back?

 
I can see why some of you would think The Colonel committed a boner, but I feel his responses were swell.  There will always be people who are hard on you.  Kissing her out of the blue, vain as that is, could make you look like a nut; sacrificing your manhood at this stage has her standing at attention.  

 
NRJ--Why are you being so coy with some of the personal details that she's shared with you?  Please be specific.

 
wait a sec... I read through that twice, but I have no idea whether it was raining or not. :confused:  

big :thumbup:  CJ... all signals' go- I'm happy for you.

 
Nathan R. Jessep said:
basically she's on the same page I am, I feel. Just proceeding with extreme caution, which I am fine with. I'm being cautious as well. There's a lot at stake here for all involved.  
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There really isn't. You're proceeding as if this relationship will for certain be "the (next) one". You can't know that at this point.  This coffee/therapy sessions read as if you're planning some kind of contractual merger. Reminded me a little of Phillip from Back to School. You want to be more like Rodney.  Sally Kellerman wants to dance and have fun.  No matter how she masked it in the texts she came to the deck to swap saliva.

 
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