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General Malaise

By General Malaise,
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Homer J Simpson

HELLO FROM REHAB!!!!   Not sure if anything's been shared but Sunday dinner at my parents' a couple weeks ago was in fact an elaborate ruse to stage an intervention.  Actually it wasn't very

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Reg Lllama of Brixton

Reg Lllama of Brixton 11,956

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14 hours ago, Dan Lambskin said:

My oldest boy (8) always seems to be into older girls.  We're at a indoor Waterpark thing and he was claiming he was bored so the wife jokes that he should go find a girlfriend 

Comes back like 10 minutes later with some middle school girl with purple hair :lmao:

 

"Pssst...son...ask her if the carpet matches the drapes...just do it"

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St. Louis Bob

St. Louis Bob 6,290

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I got a massage yesterday.  Usually get one every couple of weeks, just need to relax.  I never ask for anyone in particular, just give me a whatever female is available. Which is really a mistake because some are so much better than others but you know me, I like to roll the dice.

So yesterday I get this gal, about 250 I guess and I'm optimistic because usually in the past when I've had a big gal massage me it was always good. Plus she was a southern girl with that sweet tone. Score. However she decided it was time to talk. I sort of have that effect on people. It went from Trump is a maniac to Big Foot. She seemed surprised that I didn't believe they existed. #### got all squatchy real quick. I thought I shut her up but no. It then went to reiking which I never heard of. You see, she was qualified to reik.  Then talk about the Mothman. After that something about aluminum and how there's one source in the world and everything is crazy there. I'm thinking to myself "I know this isn't right but Bob, don't say anything for ####s sake".   Well that didn't work. Just kept talking.  She finished with a talk about her divorce in progress and 16 year old cat with Krone's that she spends $40 a week to feed. Gdamnit. :lmao:

Edited by St. Louis Bob
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St. Louis Bob

St. Louis Bob 6,290

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On 2/25/2017 at 11:55 AM, St. Louis Bob said:

I got a massage yesterday.  Usually get one every couple of weeks, just need to relax.  I never ask for anyone in particular, just give me a whatever female is available. Which is really a mistake because some are so much better than others but you know me, I like to roll the dice.

So yesterday I get this gal, about 250 I guess and I'm optimistic because usually in the past when I've had a big gal massage me it was always good. Plus she was a southern girl with that sweet tone. Score. However she decided it was time to talk. I sort of have that effect on people. It went from Trump is a maniac to Big Foot. She seemed surprised that I didn't believe they existed. #### got all squatchy real quick. I thought I shut her up but no. It then went to reiking which I never heard of. You see, she was qualified to reik.  Then talk about the Mothman. After that something about aluminum and how there's one source in the world and everything is crazy there. I'm thinking to myself "I know this isn't right but Bob, don't say anything for ####s sake".   Well that didn't work. Just kept talking.  She finished with a talk about her divorce in progress and 16 year old cat with Krone's that she spends $40 a week to feed. Gdamnit. :lmao:

Oh yeah, how could I forget, her nephew stole a bike and got 100 hours of community service because of it.  By "stole"  he was walking to school and saw a bike so he rode it to school.  He has Autism. He is also 8. That's ####### disturbing. This was in NY. 

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St. Louis Bob

St. Louis Bob 6,290

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31 minutes ago, Reg Lllama of Brixton said:

And you people wonder why I don't like massages.

:lmao: They're normally pretty great.   She also said she LOVES India and Hinduism but doesn't like the class system (her words, sure she meant caste)  or Indian people. Something about Hitler and WWI too.  Whack job.  I never tried to correct her because I just wanted her to ####.  First time ever I didn't get a little aroused from being rubbed all over. 

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GroveDiesel

GroveDiesel 9,332

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These guys are more talented at table tennis than I will ever be anything. The shot where he hits the orange ball, then the white ball, the white ball takes out all but one pin and then the orange ball takes out the last pin blows my mind.

https://youtu.be/HYz73W_dufc

Edited by GroveDiesel
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cosjobs

cosjobs 15,364

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I haven't talked of it for quite a while, but my movie will be premiering at the Dallas International Film Festival.

The festival is Mar 30 - Apr 10 or something. I will post our screening dates as soon as I get them.

Who's in?

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the rover

the rover 5,557

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1 hour ago, cosjobs said:

I haven't talked of it for quite a while, but my movie will be premiering at the Dallas International Film Festival.

The festival is Mar 30 - Apr 10 or something. I will post our screening dates as soon as I get them.

Who's in?

Interested.  I threw some money at that and I've been following it.  I'm also a failed screenwriter from my life before law and made a couple films that never got bought.

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cosjobs

cosjobs 15,364

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Just now, the rover said:

Interested.  I threw some money at that and I've been following it.  I'm also a failed screenwriter from my life before law and made a couple films that never got bought.

I think you're referring to my friend Nena's film, Stray. Its on AMazon. (give it a watch a good review)

This is about Mustang Island and Dallas will be ther world premiere.

It would be really cool to see you there.  

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mr. furley

mr. furley 12,421

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18 hours ago, the rover said:

Stripper broke up with me by text tonight.  Totally caught me by surprise because I didn't know we were still going out.

being blindsided like that is the worst

t&p in this difficult time

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Binky The Doormat

Binky The Doormat 12,945

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21 minutes ago, Sheriff Bart said:
18 hours ago, the rover said:

Stripper broke up with me by text tonight.  Totally caught me by surprise because I didn't know we were still going out.

:lmao:

 

Looking forward to "Project Stripper - Season 2".  

Not to imply there has only been one season of strippers for you.  That would be insulting. 

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