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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing


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"If you ever come near my sister again, I'm going to make you take care of twin boys for a year."

Should I do this in my best Liam Neeson voice?

" . . . but what I do have are a very particular set of strange Internet friends. Internet friends acquired over the course of a very long (now "upgraded") thread. Threads that make me a nightmare for people like you."

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Moo.

HELLO FROM REHAB!!!!   Not sure if anything's been shared but Sunday dinner at my parents' a couple weeks ago was in fact an elaborate ruse to stage an intervention.  Actually it wasn't very

Everybody take a minute tonight (or today) to raise a glass to HeckDad.  My sister just called to tell me that he passed away at home.  Don't have details other than he fell, but he was 94 with a bad

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Is the amount of eye shadow a good indicator of the amount of sluttiness? I hypothesize yes.

1. Tattoos

2. Cleavage

eye shadow is up there, but varies by ethnicity. latinas love eye shadow, but it doesn't necessarily mean anything. eye shadow on a white chick, sure.

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Every once in a while I like to see what Tim's thread is doing and compare it to here.

There: a directed discussion of the death penalty, centered around Tim's theory of the basis of western morality.

Here: best indicators of sluttiness.

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Report: Mother, daughters open bag of bananas to find ‘massive’ nest of world’s deadliest spiders

Linkage

While reading the story with interest as a bananaphile/arachnaphobe, this caught my eye:

They are aggressive and venomous spiders which can lead to death and serious injury – including a painful four-hour erection for men.

Are the spiders made of Viagra? :unsure:

Is Viagra made of spiders? :mellow:

Whoever wrote/edited that sentence should be fired. :lmao:

Edited by RedmondLonghorn
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I used to work with an ex-convict nicknamed Spider. He carved shanks and eventually parked a truck on top of a concrete barricade cuz he was drinking vodka all day.

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Is the amount of eye shadow a good indicator of the amount of sluttiness? I hypothesize yes.

My sister wears too much. People think she's a whore.

I always liked Better off Dead.

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I mentioned in the OGmtan how there has been a dead black cat on the side of the road that I walk past every day every morning.

I finally got around to acquiring all necessary materials to bury the cat. (not an euphemism)

Link

Of course a cop was driving by right as I was about to do this. I was wearing a bright orange worker's vest though that I found on the side of the road last week so I guess my attempt to look like some sort of official worker was successful.

how long did it lay there?

Late last Fall. There was one more time to cut the grass and the workers just mowed around it. Now they get to mow around it forever.

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I used to work with an ex-convict nicknamed Spider. He carved shanks and eventually parked a truck on top of a concrete barricade cuz he was drinking vodka all day.

Never saw him with a boner though

He did have spiderwebs tattooed in his ears though.

:lmao:

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"If you ever come near my sister again, I'm going to make you take care of twin boys for a year."

Should I do this in my best Liam Neeson voice?

I dunno, hearing two very, very white adolescent boys having east indian accents with an attitude might be worth it.

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:wub:

:goodposting: and all my likes for the rest of the week

Sorry to hear about your sister GM.

Me too ( :( and TPW), didn't mean to come off like a Viagra-enhanced, 3:59-mark dong with the Attempted Neeson Humor

Edited by Aerial Assault
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Report: Mother, daughters open bag of bananas to find ‘massive’ nest of world’s deadliest spiders

Linkage

While reading the story with interest as a bananaphile/arachnaphobe, this caught my eye:

They are aggressive and venomous spiders which can lead to death and serious injury – including a painful four-hour erection for men.

Are the spiders made of Viagra? :unsure:

Is Viagra made of spiders? :mellow:

Whoever wrote/edited that sentence should be fired. :lmao:

Don't eat the bananas! :breaksteeth:

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I mentioned in the OGmtan how there has been a dead black cat on the side of the road that I walk past every day every morning.

I finally got around to acquiring all necessary materials to bury the cat. (not an euphemism)

Link

Of course a cop was driving by right as I was about to do this. I was wearing a bright orange worker's vest though that I found on the side of the road last week so I guess my attempt to look like some sort of official worker was successful.

how long did it lay there?

Late last Fall. There was one more time to cut the grass and the workers just mowed around it. Now they get to mow around it forever.

YESS!!!

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Soooooooooooo..................got a text from my sister last night and wasn't exactly a happy one. Some of you may remember that she jumped into a relationship with an extreme-skiing, hard drinking, thrill seeking, cocaine loving sociopathic Indian fellow named Asit. You can also add abusive to that list of adjectives. They broke up this summer, got back together. They broke up again in December and again, got back together. Each time, she would wail and cry on social media for attention, run back to her family and friends begging for sympathy only to go back to the very cause of her pain and sorrow.

Last night, via text, she informed me that she had him arrested and is filing a restraining order against him. She busted him stealing her checkbook and writing checks to himself. When she confronted him, he went into a violent rage, throwing her against a wall, ripping off her necklace and then went on a rampage in her house, breaking things, punching walls, etc. She called her friend in tears and her friend, who lives nearby, called 911.

The coward ran off to his parents house and tried to hide, but the cops were able to get him out and arrested him. I hope she presses charges. I hope she follows through with a restraining order. I hope this is the last we ever hear from this piece of garbage again. But a lot me worries it won't be. An even bigger part of me worries he will come after her and/or her kids and/or my parents, who let them live in the their basement for months while this psycho pretended to have a job and go to work every day.

It's times like this where I wish SLB lived near me so we could pay this guy a little visit. Were I bigger, younger and unafraid of violent men who shoot guns, carry knives and ride motorcycles, I might confront him myself. But he'd curb stomp me and if he didn't, I'd be in jail for what I'd like to do to him.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...................as if I didn't have enough on my plate.

Wait a minute. Indian as in asianed Indian and not an Apache? Not understanding the fear.

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Interview went well as predicted....should have in person in the next week or two.

We already lost the kristas because of a stupid job. If you bail, I will find you.

;)

Won't impact Vehashole at all. Job could start probably mid-April if I am offered it.

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Soooooooooooo..................got a text from my sister last night and wasn't exactly a happy one. Some of you may remember that she jumped into a relationship with an extreme-skiing, hard drinking, thrill seeking, cocaine loving sociopathic Indian fellow named Asit. You can also add abusive to that list of adjectives. They broke up this summer, got back together. They broke up again in December and again, got back together. Each time, she would wail and cry on social media for attention, run back to her family and friends begging for sympathy only to go back to the very cause of her pain and sorrow.

Last night, via text, she informed me that she had him arrested and is filing a restraining order against him. She busted him stealing her checkbook and writing checks to himself. When she confronted him, he went into a violent rage, throwing her against a wall, ripping off her necklace and then went on a rampage in her house, breaking things, punching walls, etc. She called her friend in tears and her friend, who lives nearby, called 911.

The coward ran off to his parents house and tried to hide, but the cops were able to get him out and arrested him. I hope she presses charges. I hope she follows through with a restraining order. I hope this is the last we ever hear from this piece of garbage again. But a lot me worries it won't be. An even bigger part of me worries he will come after her and/or her kids and/or my parents, who let them live in the their basement for months while this psycho pretended to have a job and go to work every day.

It's times like this where I wish SLB lived near me so we could pay this guy a little visit. Were I bigger, younger and unafraid of violent men who shoot guns, carry knives and ride motorcycles, I might confront him myself. But he'd curb stomp me and if he didn't, I'd be in jail for what I'd like to do to him.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...................as if I didn't have enough on my plate.

Feather or dot?

Asit. Not A Sitting Bull.

Thinking you need to get up in Asit's grill and tell him to do the mother ####### needful.

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I mentioned in the OGmtan how there has been a dead black cat on the side of the road that I walk past every day every morning.

I finally got around to acquiring all necessary materials to bury the cat. (not an euphemism)

Link

Of course a cop was driving by right as I was about to do this. I was wearing a bright orange worker's vest though that I found on the side of the road last week so I guess my attempt to look like some sort of official worker was successful.

:lmao:

wtf???

:lmao: ####ing incredible.

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I mentioned in the OGmtan how there has been a dead black cat on the side of the road that I walk past every day every morning.

I finally got around to acquiring all necessary materials to bury the cat. (not an euphemism)

Link

Of course a cop was driving by right as I was about to do this. I was wearing a bright orange worker's vest though that I found on the side of the road last week so I guess my attempt to look like some sort of official worker was successful.

:lmao:

wtf???

:lmao: ####ing incredible.

It really is perfect. The name, the fact that it's a cat. The fact that it's a dead cat.

We have a new mascot!

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Dylan's birthday is Sunday. A couple of months ago Mrs. SLB asked me if I was getting him an iPod Touch. Being the cheap ### I am, I told her she was insane. She replied that he was expecting one since I promised him one....on Cal's 8th birthday when I bought him one. Get the #### out I'm, thinking. A couple of weeks ago my Mom asked me if I really bought him an iPod. I told her no, no I didn't. Mom told me he was telling her how happy he was because it was finally his 8th birthday and I promised him one. Dyl hasn't said a word to me about it. Not once. Damn I ####### admire that. As I just typed that, it made me realize that maybe he know that when I say I'm going to do something, you can bank it. Which you can. Wow. (sorry a little tired and buzzed) I don't know for sure but will try to find out next week.

There's a shiny new iPod in my desk right now I'm going to give him Sunday.

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I mentioned in the OGmtan how there has been a dead black cat on the side of the road that I walk past every day every morning.

I finally got around to acquiring all necessary materials to bury the cat. (not an euphemism)

Link

Of course a cop was driving by right as I was about to do this. I was wearing a bright orange worker's vest though that I found on the side of the road last week so I guess my attempt to look like some sort of official worker was successful.

:lmao:

wtf???

:lmao: ####ing incredible.

It really is perfect. The name, the fact that it's a cat. The fact that it's a dead cat.

We have a new mascot!

:goodposting:

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Dylan's birthday is Sunday. A couple of months ago Mrs. SLB asked me if I was getting him an iPod Touch. Being the cheap ### I am, I told her she was insane. She replied that he was expecting one since I promised him one....on Cal's 8th birthday when I bought him one. Get the #### out I'm, thinking. A couple of weeks ago my Mom asked me if I really bought him an iPod. I told her no, no I didn't. Mom told me he was telling her how happy he was because it was finally his 8th birthday and I promised him one. Dyl hasn't said a word to me about it. Not once. Damn I ####### admire that. As I just typed that, it made me realize that maybe he know that when I say I'm going to do something, you can bank it. Which you can. Wow. (sorry a little tired and buzzed) I don't know for sure but will try to find out next week.

There's a shiny new iPod in my desk right now I'm going to give him Sunday.

:thumbup: load that mofo up with Cheap Trick.

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