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My girlfriend is close friends with her ex-boyfriend (1 Viewer)

Buckfast 1

Footballguy
I've been dating a girl for about 6 months that remains very close friends with her ex-boyfriend. They dated for around 6 years and broke up about a year and a half ago. They also have a dog that they got together, so they essentially share custody of their dog. He goes over to her place occasionally to spend time with the dog or to pick up the dog for the weekend. They occasionally eat lunch or dinner together, text each other every couple days or so, and occasionally talk on the phone.

My girlfriend has been pretty up-front about her friendship with her ex-boyfriend all along, but it has just become progressively more annoying to me over time. I honestly have no concern that they have any sort of ongoing sexual relationship or that she would ever cheat on me, but I just don't think it is healthy for the future of our relationship to have her ex-boyfriend to continue to be so involved in her life. I have no problem with him picking up the dog for the weekend, but I find things like him going over to her place for dinner and texting regularly to be somewhat irksome. I've gotten mad when I found out that she had confided in her ex-boyfriend about some issues that we had our relationship. I also got pretty annoyed on Saturday when she asked if her ex-boyfriend could come over to my house to pick up their dog (who my brother was watching for the weekend while we were out of town).

Does anyone have any experience with a similar situation? Do you think I am out of line for getting annoyed with this friendship with her ex-boyfriend? How would you handle this situation?

 
I've been dating a girl for about 6 months that remains very close friends with her ex-boyfriend. They dated for around 6 years and broke up about a year and a half ago. They also have a dog that they got together, so they essentially share custody of their dog. He goes over to her place occasionally to spend time with the dog or to pick up the dog for the weekend. They occasionally eat lunch or dinner together, text each other every couple days or so, and occasionally talk on the phone.

My girlfriend has been pretty up-front about her friendship with her ex-boyfriend all along, but it has just become progressively more annoying to me over time. I honestly have no concern that they have any sort of ongoing sexual relationship or that she would ever cheat on me, but I just don't think it is healthy for the future of our relationship to have her ex-boyfriend to continue to be so involved in her life. I have no problem with him picking up the dog for the weekend, but I find things like him going over to her place for dinner and texting regularly to be somewhat irksome. I've gotten mad when I found out that she had confided in her ex-boyfriend about some issues that we had our relationship. I also got pretty annoyed on Saturday when she asked if her ex-boyfriend could come over to my house to pick up their dog (who my brother was watching for the weekend while we were out of town).

Does anyone have any experience with a similar situation? Do you think I am out of line for getting annoyed with this friendship with her ex-boyfriend? How would you handle this situation?
Yes

No, but it doesn't mean either of them are wrong either.

Break up with her. You're not getting past this and it's just going to fester.

 
I've been the ex-boyfriend in similar situations with three different girls that all had new boyfriends. I was banging all three of them.

 
She's is absolutely still sleeping with him. Here's how you find out for sure: Train the dog to bark whenever someone's recently ejaculated, then make a surprise visit the next time the ex-BF is at her place. If the dog is going nuts…..you have your answer.

Now, this may backfire if you masturbate a lot(or are cheating on the GF yourself, I suppose). Adjust as needed.

 
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Time for you to discuss it with her first and move on if you don't like her answers.
Yeah, that is basically where I am at now. We've already had a few discussions about it, but I don't feel like anything has changed. We are having another talk about it tonight, so I am just kind of brainstorming how to handle the discussion tonight.

 
Not cool and not fair to you. Way too much communication with her ex. She needs to cut it off with him or you move on without her.

 
I've been dating a girl for about 6 months that remains very close friends with her ex-boyfriend. They dated for around 6 years and broke up about a year and a half ago. They also have a dog that they got together, so they essentially share custody of their dog. He goes over to her place occasionally to spend time with the dog or to pick up the dog for the weekend. They occasionally eat lunch or dinner together, text each other every couple days or so, and occasionally talk on the phone.

My girlfriend has been pretty up-front about her friendship with her ex-boyfriend all along, but it has just become progressively more annoying to me over time. I honestly have no concern that they have any sort of ongoing sexual relationship or that she would ever cheat on me, but I just don't think it is healthy for the future of our relationship to have her ex-boyfriend to continue to be so involved in her life. I have no problem with him picking up the dog for the weekend, but I find things like him going over to her place for dinner and texting regularly to be somewhat irksome. I've gotten mad when I found out that she had confided in her ex-boyfriend about some issues that we had our relationship. I also got pretty annoyed on Saturday when she asked if her ex-boyfriend could come over to my house to pick up their dog (who my brother was watching for the weekend while we were out of town).

Does anyone have any experience with a similar situation? Do you think I am out of line for getting annoyed with this friendship with her ex-boyfriend? How would you handle this situation?
Actually he goes over there to #### her, whenever she wants him to; the dog is a cover story.

Find someone who gives a #### about you, because this one doesn't.

 
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She's is absolutely still sleeping with him. Here's how you find out for sure: Train the dog to bark whenever someone's recently ejaculated, then make a surprise visit the next time the ex-BF is at her place. If the dog is going nuts…..you have your answer.

Now, this may backfire if you masturbate a lot(or are cheating on the GF yourself, I suppose). Adjust as needed.
Her dog already barks way too much. There is no way I am training that thing to call me out for masturbating.

 
All about how much you trust her and how secure you are with yourself.
I do really trust her and am very secure in myself. I really don't have any concern that she is sleeping with him or that she would leave me for him. I just find it annoying that this ex-boyfriend is still lingering about. I kind of think that my girlfriend is just too nice to cut someone out of her life.

 
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totally depends on the people involved. hard to say without knowing them. but the truth of the matter is ex sex is always on the table.

 
Her dog already barks way too much. There is no way I am training that thing to call me out for masturbating.
Hmmm….

Sounds like the last BF already has the dog trained.

And he's railing her six ways from Sunday.

 
You're gonna come off as petty and insecure if you keep bringing this up. A him or me talk isnt gonna help, if anything she's already chosen.

 
Time for you to discuss it with her first and move on if you don't like her answers.
Yeah, that is basically where I am at now. We've already had a few discussions about it, but I don't feel like anything has changed. We are having another talk about it tonight, so I am just kind of brainstorming how to handle the discussion tonight.
Don't talk about it tonight. If she brings it up, just act like, "Forgot about that. Whatever." Show confidence.

Pee on her carpet to mark your territory.

 
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Time for you to discuss it with her first and move on if you don't like her answers.
Yeah, that is basically where I am at now. We've already had a few discussions about it, but I don't feel like anything has changed. We are having another talk about it tonight, so I am just kind of brainstorming how to handle the discussion tonight.
Do you know any details of why they broke up?

 
All about how much you trust her and how secure you are with yourself.
I do really trust her and am very secure in myself. I really don't have any concern that she is sleeping with him or that she would leave me for him. I just find it annoying that this ex-boyfriend is still lingering about. I kind of thing that my girlfriend is just too nice to cut someone out of her life.
I dated and banged my best friend and once we broke up we remained friends to this day and talk almost everyday either by text or phone and see each other a few times a week.I told my girl the deal up front and she was fine with it once she saw us together and how we acted towards each other.It's all about trust for me.

And for the record I did not bang my friend again and have no desire to.

ETA:I should also add that my girl is still friends will one of her previous b/f's as well.

 
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does the ex-boyfriend have a girlfriend? If so, start hanging out with her and texting/talking to her all the time as "friends" and see how the girlfriend reacts.

 
Ask her how she would feel if her ex-boyfriend wasn't in her life but your ex-girlfriend was in yours. If that doesn't work, have someone steal the dog (just make sure he goes to a good person that will take care of it).

 
All about how much you trust her and how secure you are with yourself.
I do really trust her and am very secure in myself. I really don't have any concern that she is sleeping with him or that she would leave me for him. I just find it annoying that this ex-boyfriend is still lingering about. I kind of thing that my girlfriend is just too nice to cut someone out of her life.
I dated and banged my best friend and once we broke up we remained friends to this day and talk almost everyday either by text or phone and see each other a few times a week.I told my girl the deal up front and she was fine with it once she saw us together and how we acted towards each other.It's all about trust for me.

And for the record I did not bang my friend again and have no desire to.

ETA:I should also add that my girl is still friends will one of her previous b/f's as well.
Does her ex-bf like baloney sandwiches?

 
Time for you to discuss it with her first and move on if you don't like her answers.
Yeah, that is basically where I am at now. We've already had a few discussions about it, but I don't feel like anything has changed. We are having another talk about it tonight, so I am just kind of brainstorming how to handle the discussion tonight.
Do you know any details of why they broke up?
She apparently broke up with him because they just kind of grew apart and lost passion over the years. She said they hardly ever had sex and it felt more like a friendship than a romantic relationship. That's what she tells me at least, although I guess that seems like a convenient thing to tell your boyfriend when you are trying to maintain a friendship with an ex.

 
Tell her honestly that you cannot get past this. Let her know that the inability to get past this is your problem, not hers. Move on amicably, absolutely no recriminations or accusations. Find someone with whom you are more compatible.

 
Ask her how she would feel if her ex-boyfriend wasn't in her life but your ex-girlfriend was in yours. If that doesn't work, have someone steal the dog (just make sure he goes to a good person that will take care of it).
what is his move when she says "I would be fine with it"?

 
I'm as naive as they come and even I don't think I could fully trust a woman I have been dating for 6 months whose bf is coming over to see his dog whenever he feels like it and think he is not banging his old flame.

 
Tell her honestly that you cannot get past this. Let her know that the inability to get past this is your problem, not hers. Move on amicably, absolutely no recriminations or accusations. Find someone with whom you are more compatible.
I wish someone had said this before.

 
Do what makes you happy. If having him around bothers you, say something to her. If she doesn't understand, then she's not ever going to. Which means you'll be miserable.

 
Establish dominance. #### the dog and the ex on camera. Show it to the GF to let her know you're the alpha of the pack.

 

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