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Names in Marriage (1 Viewer)

Would it bother you or your family if your wife did not take your last name?

  • No - It doesn't bother me if she keeps her last name as is.

    Votes: 38 23.5%

  • Yes - I like the traditional idea of the wife taking the husband's name.

    Votes: 69 42.6%

  • I couldn't possibly care any less about this than I do right now.

    Votes: 30 18.5%

  • Yoga Pants

    Votes: 25 15.4%
  • Total voters
    162
Jayrok

Jayrok

Footballguy
Mr. Jones has a son. His only son. The son married a young lady 8 months ago. Her last name is Stinson. After tinkering with the idea of hyphenating her name to Stinson-Jones, she ultimately decided that she didn't want to hyphenate or take Jones as her last name. So almost a year in they are M. Jones and C. Stinson.

They do not yet have children.

If you are the son or Mr. Jones, would this bother you at all?

 
Mr. Jones also has a daughter who was married over a year ago. The daughter took her husband's last name.

 
Doesn't bother me at all... My wife never legally changed her name, but she refers to herself as my last name, her email handle is my last name, and our son has my last name.

 
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I have my last name. My wife has her last name. Our kid has my last name. And none of us could give a #### less.

 
Jayrok said:
Mr. Jones also has a daughter who was married over a year ago. The daughter took her husband's last name.
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He should have kept his own house in order (i.e., raising a daughter that wanted to keep her own damn name), and maybe he wouldn't be pissy about his son's wife doing the same.

 
fantasycurse42 said:
Doesn't bother me at all... My wife never legally changed her name, but she refers to herself as my last name, her email handle is my last name, and our son has my last name.
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I was wondering what the children's last names will be. Would it bother you if you son had your wife's last name?

 
My aunt kept her last name because she is a doctor and didn't want to have to change her name on her practice. My cousins have hyphenated last names.

 
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Im not sure one could truly answer that until it actually happens. I think the first thought is, who cares? But for me, I think overall, it would bother me a bit. Probably 3 years down the line:

Her: Just pull over and ask for directions. We dont get a phone signal out here.

Me: I'll find it

(45 mninutes later)

Her: Just pull over and ask.

Me: Shut you whore mouth! You wont even take my last name!

 
Sweet J said:
Jayrok said:
Mr. Jones also has a daughter who was married over a year ago. The daughter took her husband's last name.
Click to expand...
He should have kept his own house in order (i.e., raising a daughter that wanted to keep her own damn name), and maybe he wouldn't be pissy about his son's wife doing the same.
Click to expand...
As far as I recall his daughter kept her last name as her middle name. So not hyphenated but her last name is still in there.

 
We have reached a point in America that this shouldn't be an issue at all. Any man worth his salt shouldn't blink if a woman wants to keep her own name.

The real coming battles will be the name of our kids. My kids have my last name, and I'm glad. I don't know how I would have reacted if their mom felt otherwise.

PS: I'd be pretty disappointed if my daughter takes her future husband's last name. (I could care less what my son's wife does. If she wants to keep her name, so be it. If she doesn't, whatever)

 
Sweet J said:
We have reached a point in America that this shouldn't be an issue at all. Any man worth his salt shouldn't blink if a woman wants to keep her own name.

The real coming battles will be the name of our kids. My kids have my last name, and I'm glad. I don't know how I would have reacted if their mom felt otherwise.

PS: I'd be pretty disappointed if my daughter takes her future husband's last name. (I could care less what my son's wife does. If she wants to keep her name, so be it. If she doesn't, whatever)
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On a scale of 1-10, how much less could you care?

 
My wife's aunt and uncle each kept their own last names. They had 3 boys. The first and the third boy took the fathers last name. The middle boy took the mothers last name. The middle boy turned out gay. Not worth the risk.

 
It shouldn't matter but it can be emasculating whether you like it or not. People can't help but think - why the reason to break tradition? There must be a reason.

Knew a guy at work whose wife kept her name and a lot of people were puzzled by it, would whisper behind his back that she has his balls in her purse, and he had to deal with questions about it. And this is in liberal california.

 
Jayrok said:
fantasycurse42 said:
Doesn't bother me at all... My wife never legally changed her name, but she refers to herself as my last name, her email handle is my last name, and our son has my last name.
Click to expand...
I was wondering what the children's last names will be. Would it bother you if you son had your wife's last name?
Click to expand...
Yes. It's probably not a very progressive thing to admit, but I would care.

So to sum:

1. Don't want my daughter taking her husband's last name (though it's her choice).

2. Totally understand if daughter's husband wants their kid to have his last name.

3. Don't care if son's wife keeps her last name.

4. Would be a bit peeved if son's wife insisted on their kid having her last name.

5. I know a guy who combined his last name and wife's last name to make a totally new last name that they both then took. I generally think of him as a Ninny, and this was a Ninny thing to do.

6. I know a guy who was treated like dirt by his father (and his whole family, really). He cut off ties as an adult, and when he got married he took his wife's last name. I think that's kind of cool.

 
Sweet J said:
We have reached a point in America that this shouldn't be an issue at all. Any man worth his salt shouldn't blink if a woman wants to keep her own name.

The real coming battles will be the name of our kids. My kids have my last name, and I'm glad. I don't know how I would have reacted if their mom felt otherwise.

PS: I'd be pretty disappointed if my daughter takes her future husband's last name. (I could care less what my son's wife does. If she wants to keep her name, so be it. If she doesn't, whatever)
Click to expand...
That's the thing. This situation isn't about just not taking the time to change her name legally. She does not like "Jones" and said she didn't want a common name like that. The compromise was to hyphenate but she changed her mind. The son is a little hurt but said he wanted to be the bigger man and take the high road.

Yes, what's in a name? Well, when she argues that her children will take her last name and that's it.. IDK, just seems a little odd to me.

 
My wife had a hard to pronounce Polish maiden name and was glad to change to mine. I don't think I would have cared if she didn't though.

We'll never have kids so that's not an issue either.

 
Cliff Clavin said:
If she wants the tradition of marriage, she gets the tradition of taking my name.
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All of the usual traditions regarding the ceremony were wanted by her. Showers, gifts, big wedding, groom can't see her before the ceremony, her father "gives" her away, and so forth.

 
My daugher took her husband's name. It never crossed my mind that it might be any other way. My wife took my name 31 years ago. And I never thought about it until a recent conversation with the particulars in this case. I admit that if it were my son, I would be a little disappointed if his wife didn't want our last name.

 
Arapaho of nothing but I usually have 7 or 8 students every year with hyphenated last names. 50% of the time they go by just one of the last names.

 
Sweet J said:
We have reached a point in America that this shouldn't be an issue at all. Any man worth his salt shouldn't blink if a woman wants to keep her own name.

The real coming battles will be the name of our kids. My kids have my last name, and I'm glad. I don't know how I would have reacted if their mom felt otherwise.

PS: I'd be pretty disappointed if my daughter takes her future husband's last name. (I could care less what my son's wife does. If she wants to keep her name, so be it. If she doesn't, whatever)
Click to expand...
:loco:

 
Jayrok said:
My daugher took her husband's name. It never crossed my mind that it might be any other way. My wife took my name 31 years ago. And I never thought about it until a recent conversation with the particulars in this case. I admit that if it were my son, I would be a little disappointed if his wife didn't want our last name.
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What if he marries another man?

 
I took my husbands last name and all our kids have our last name. I think it shows a unity. I don't care which name or a new name gets used, but I think we should all have the same.

 
I'm married to Mrs. Hyphen-Eephus. It's her name and if she wants to spell it out for people over the phone, more power to her.

If you make a big deal about your partner's name, you're probably going to have a problem with some of the other many mutual compromises needed during a long and happy marriage.

 
What's the call when two people with hyphenated names get married or have children? Do the kids just get the hyphenated name from one parent or do you go with the quadruple hyphenation?

 
Spin said:
My aunt kept her last name because she is a doctor and didn't want to have to change her name on her practice. My cousins have hyphenated last names.
Click to expand...
Of course, in this situation I wouldn't expect the professional would change the name.

 
Officer Pete Malloy said:
Jayrok said:
My daugher took her husband's name. It never crossed my mind that it might be any other way. My wife took my name 31 years ago. And I never thought about it until a recent conversation with the particulars in this case. I admit that if it were my son, I would be a little disappointed if his wife didn't want our last name.
Click to expand...
What if he marries another man?
Click to expand...
Interesting.. if he marries another man I imagine they will hyphenate. I will ask him and see.

 
I could not say that it would not bother me at all but as long as my children took my last name- I would be ok with it.

 
I'm traditional so unless her name is part of an established business/practice or a well know actress etc I find it strange when she doesn't want to take the husbands name. I will encourage both my daughter, should they marry, to take their husbands last name.

I don't really think too differently when I meet a couple who have different last names but it is somewhat common in my experience that women who don't take their husbands name tend to be a bit stronger willed (not saying good bad or otherwise).

 
Yes, it would bother me. In fact, it is a red flag in my book, but I am pretty traditional when it comes to things. So if a hypothetical woman on hypothetical date let it be known she wasn't going to take her husband-to-be's last name, I'd hypothetically move on.

 
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