Jump to content
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

How do you deal rejection?


Recommended Posts

2 minutes ago, JoeSteeler said:

Incel?

Noun

incel (countable and uncountable, plural incels)

1. (neologism, broadly) A person who is not sexually active despite desiring to be. quotations ▼

Synonyms: see Thesaurus:incel

Antonym: volcel

Hyponym: AFChick

2. (neologism, specifically) A member of a mostly online subculture of people (typically misogynistic, white straight men) who define themselves by being unable to find a sexual relationship despite desiring one. quotations ▼

3. (uncountable, seduction community, informal) "Involuntary celibacy": the state of not being sexually active despite wishing to be.

Synonyms: incelibacy, love-shyness, ####stration, AFCdom, AFCness

  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
39 minutes ago, wazoo11 said:

What would you tell an Incel that wants to change his behavior?

When you say change his behavior do you mean that the person is doing something that isn't getting them laid or do you just mean they want to get laid?  Feels like we are missing a lot of details to give good advice.  In general, I would say, be yourself, be kind, spend time hanging out with friends - they should put themselves in situations to meet women (or men) - social groups like churches or clubs.  The person should also realize that while sex is fantastic, it usually isn't that great for somebody who is inexperienced and with a mate for the first time.  So, it may be a little bit of a let down.

And masturbate - a lot.

Link to post
Share on other sites
46 minutes ago, wazoo11 said:

What would you tell an Incel that wants to change his behavior?

Are you willing to listen to my advice?

Because here's the first thing you need to do.

The first thing you need to do is........fix the damn thread title.

  • Like 4
  • Thanks 1
  • Laughing 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

Are they just like, complaining on the internet while doing nothing, or actively asking people out but getting rejected? If it is the former, just go to some online dating service thing and start asking people out, worst case scenario you end up dateless which is where you would be anyway. If it is the latter, I dunno, need a picture or something.

Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Walking Boot said:

I remember being in my early- to mid-20s and having a hard time meeting girls. Now I'm in my early- to mid-40s and I've got girls in their early- to mid-20s chasing after me all the time. So... chill out and wait, I guess?

I agree, life changes a lot year to year. Also, making simple changes can have profound impacts down the road. Start working out or reading books, getting a nice wardrobe or taking college classes, improve yourself in some way and it will have a positive impact. 

Edited by Ilov80s
  • Like 1
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, AAABatteries said:

And masturbate - a lot.

This is terrible advice and I couldn't disagree with you more. Terrible, terrible advice. Stop giving advice, please.

Advice for this person should begin with and end at self improvement. Do something you enjoy, but work to improve yourself every single day and accomplish difficult goals. Confidence will result, as well as an increased self esteem, which will then attract a healthy mate. Stop masturbating. It takes all your ambition away.

Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Galileo said:

Noun

incel (countable and uncountable, plural incels)

1. (neologism, broadly) A person who is not sexually active despite desiring to be. quotations ▼

Synonyms: see Thesaurus:incel

Antonym: volcel

Hyponym: AFChick

2. (neologism, specifically) A member of a mostly online subculture of people (typically misogynistic, white straight men) who define themselves by being unable to find a sexual relationship despite desiring one. quotations ▼

3. (uncountable, seduction community, informal) "Involuntary celibacy": the state of not being sexually active despite wishing to be.

Synonyms: incelibacy, love-shyness, ####stration, AFCdom, AFCness

AFCdom?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Is this you?

 

If you’re serious...

1.  Be clean. Shower, shave, cut your hair, wear deodorant, etc...

2.  Talk to people.  Listen to people.

3.  Accept that you’ll fail sometimes, but if you keep trying sometimes you won’t. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
3 hours ago, Galileo said:

Noun

incel (countable and uncountable, plural incels)

1. (neologism, broadly) A person who is not sexually active despite desiring to be. quotations ▼

Synonyms: see Thesaurus:incel

Antonym: volcel

Hyponym: AFChick

2. (neologism, specifically) A member of a mostly online subculture of people (typically misogynistic, white straight men) who define themselves by being unable to find a sexual relationship despite desiring one. quotations ▼

3. (uncountable, seduction community, informal) "Involuntary celibacy": the state of not being sexually active despite wishing to be.

Synonyms: incelibacy, love-shyness, ####stration, AFCdom, AFCness

Oh hey

Link to post
Share on other sites
8 minutes ago, BobbyLayne said:

TIL

Incels are members of an onlinesubculture who define themselves as unable to find a romantic or sexual partner despite desiring one, a state they describe as inceldom.

Vice did a good story awhile back.

https://youtu.be/oliq8m8Qph0

 

Honestly I still just think it’s a bunch of guys on the spectrum that watch too much porn and get the wrong idea about relationships.

Edited by bigmarc27
  • Thanks 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
22 minutes ago, BobbyLayne said:

Rule 1 and Rule 2 apply.

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

1. Be good looking

2. Don’t be unattractive 

Always but just being nice and even keel can go a long way. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, bigmarc27 said:

Vice did a good story awhile back.

https://youtu.be/oliq8m8Qph0

 

Honestly I still just think it’s a bunch of guys on the spectrum that watch too much porn and get the wrong idea about relationships.

What I got from that is they are losers who get in a chat room to perpetuate their failures?

It is like the echo chamber of the political forum on steroids.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Lower your standards.  Really, this is it.  There are tons of girls out there not getting asked out that would love to go on a date.  

Far too many incels or whatever you term them are looking for the "perfect woman."  They want a doctor/model that ####s like a pornstar.  They think that if said hot chick would just give them a chance then she'd see they were so much more than their looks and fall deeply in love with them.

Well, there's tons of fat girls out there that are amazing people too.  Maybe you need to give one of them a chance.

  • Like 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
8 hours ago, ChainsawU said:

This is terrible advice and I couldn't disagree with you more. Terrible, terrible advice. Stop giving advice, please.

Advice for this person should begin with and end at self improvement. Do something you enjoy, but work to improve yourself every single day and accomplish difficult goals. Confidence will result, as well as an increased self esteem, which will then attract a healthy mate. Stop masturbating. It takes all your ambition away.

Pretty good advice, though a little masturbation is OK. I'd avoid pornography though.

Link to post
Share on other sites
51 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

Pretty good advice, though a little masturbation is OK. I'd avoid pornography though.

So the guy can't get laid and he can't masturbate or check out porn?  You trying to get him to off himself?

Link to post
Share on other sites
13 hours ago, James Daulton said:

So the guy can't get laid and he can't masturbate or check out porn?  You trying to get him to off himself?

My goal is him not getting off.

But seriously, masturbation in moderation is fine.  Porn can turn into an obsession for some, and he’s probably a set up for it. Moreover, it gives a very warped view of sexuality.

Don't get me wrong, I have no problem with pornography, assuming the participants are willing. But I think it’s best to supplement a healthy sex life, not serve as an outlet for frustration.

Edited by Terminalxylem
Link to post
Share on other sites
12 hours ago, bigmarc27 said:
12 hours ago, BobbyLayne said:

TIL

Incels are members of an onlinesubculture who define themselves as unable to find a romantic or sexual partner despite desiring one, a state they describe as inceldom.

Vice did a good story awhile back.

https://youtu.be/oliq8m8Qph0

Honestly I still just think it’s a bunch of guys on the spectrum that watch too much porn and get the wrong idea about relationships.

These guys are also pretty passive when it comes to women. They might pine for someone and somewhat shyly interact with them, but they really want the girl to "notice" them, and make the first real move / give the "all clear" sign. And that's not really how it works. 

Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, jwb said:

These guys are also pretty passive when it comes to women. They might pine for someone and somewhat shyly interact with them, but they really want the girl to "notice" them, and make the first real move / give the "all clear" sign. And that's not really how it works. 

When I was in college, during the summers I would work in a large imaging print shop (think Kinkos but for blueprints). The other guy there was early 20s and a bit strange but I’d try to chat with him. He got the job because his older sister was a manager and she was cool. Anyway, he lived at home and would always try to chat about anime with me which I know nothing about. One day he got back from lunch and I asked where he went.  He told me he went to see his girlfriend at the mall.  This blew my mind so I asked what her name was... he didn’t know.  It turns out his “girlfriend” just worked at a kiosk in the mall.  He would go there every day and walk by her and that was enough interaction that he thought they were together. He would tell me that she “has that soft Asian look that I love.”

 

I stopped asking at that point. 

  • Laughing 1
Link to post
Share on other sites

just bottom out in a couple chicks and see what kinda sounds they make and then your confidence will be sky high to achieve whatever you want also it helps if they are short chicks to

Link to post
Share on other sites

Fear of rejection/getting overly upset at being rejected is really just a symptom of a larger issue. 

The issue is you tie your self-worth into how others view you. You're externally validating. Getting rejected should not rock your world and throw you off your ship. If it does, you're externally validating. 

Reacting to getting rejected by getting all upset and thinking "I'm the worst" is just as bad as getting the girl and thinking "I'm the best." 

Both are wrong. Whether you get the girl or not should not change the view of yourself in your own eyes. Be mindful of the voice in your head and how you talk to yourself.  

You don't need the girl for happiness. You don't need the girl at all. Understand what the word "need" means. 

Additionally, stop putting the girl on a pedestal. She's not "the one" or something incredible. No she isn't "perfect." She's just another human being who eats, breathes, vomits, and takes dumps. She's not some innocent angel sent from the depths of the heavens. She's another person with issues of her own just like you and I. If a hot girl ate cake morning, noon, and night, she'd get fat. In other words, she's human. Nothing more, nothing less. See it for what it is, not for what your mind has conditioned you to make it think it is. A girl doesn't make your life. She simply compliments it. And you compliment hers as well. 

 

  • Like 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
14 hours ago, Don't Toews Me said:

If a hot girl ate cake morning, noon, and night, she'd have her cake and eat it, too

FYP for the PYTs

Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, Walking Boot said:

Yup. True story: Friend tried to fix me up on a date with Taylor Swift. Turned her down. Rejected! If it could happen to her, it could happen to anyone!

This is nuts.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...