RedmondLonghorn
Footballguy
A while back I read the book Principles: Life and Work by Ray Dalio. The book was pretty decent, even if I came away with the strong feeling that I wouldn't like working for Dalio very much (he seems like an ##### and a weirdo).
One of the best things about the book was that it suggested that each reader come up with his or her own set of operating principles. Doing so in a thoughtful way is almost certainly better than following those written by somebody else in some self-help book.
While I don't pretend to have life all figured out, I do think I came up with a decent set. I have been refining them for a while. I am not sure what the purpose of posting them is, other than the fact that I haven't ever written them down or explained them to anybody. So I guess I am checking my own thinking and inviting discussion.
So, here they are. They are roughly hierarchical, which means the higher they appear on the list, the more precedence they have.
1. People are the most important thing in this life, so endeavor to be decent.
Being decent doesn't means being perfect. But it does mean showing empathy and treating others the way you would want to be treated. In Christianity that is what is known as the Golden Rule, but most major religions feature similar teachings. It is more generally known as the Ethic of Reciprocity.
2. Live up to your commitments.
This includes both very simple ideas (do what you say you will do, pay your debts) and slightly more complicated ones. The slightly more complicated version is to fulfill your implicit commitments. Like doing your duty to your spouse to be a good partner, doing your duty to your kids to be a good parent, etc..
3. Seek the truth and embrace reality.
Try to understand what is really happening in the world around you and avoid self-deception. "Seek the truth" may sound high falutin', but it is essential to me in terms of challenging myself to really understand what is really going on and what matters. It can be applied in current events, office politics, family dynamics, or anywhere else. I tend to apply something called "Bayesian thinking" to seeking the truth. In essence, it entails starting with an estimate of the probability that any claim, idea, or hypothesis is true, then continuously updating that estimate as new information becomes available. It is a really useful mental model when applied in an unbiased fashion.
Self-deception is incredibly damaging because it can lead to complacency or, worse still, rationalizing behavior that is self-destructive or harmful to others.
4. Be as honest and direct as possible in your dealings with others.
Honesty is important to me, but I won't pretend that I never tell a lie. Under these principles, "little white lies" are permissible. Because if telling the truth would violate the principle of decency, you shouldn't do it. But lies to avoid living up to your commitments would be prohibited by two principles, so they really aren't okay.
The direct part is more challenging for me, but something I am working on. I grew up in an almost pathologically non-confrontational household and I can say with certainty that acting like that can cause real problems. But directness needn't mean tactlessness. In fact, if being too direct would violate the principle of decency, you shouldn't do it.
That's it. These principles are both simple and flexible. They work for me, but they can be challenging to follow. Though I didn't intend for this to be a political post, I have also found that for me they essentially have replaced having any set ideology.
I have no idea if anybody else will find this interesting, but it is something I have thought a lot about on and off over the last year or so.
ETA: If you are interested in some non-statistical examples of the use of Bayesian thinking, these blog posts are pretty good. Link Link
One of the best things about the book was that it suggested that each reader come up with his or her own set of operating principles. Doing so in a thoughtful way is almost certainly better than following those written by somebody else in some self-help book.
While I don't pretend to have life all figured out, I do think I came up with a decent set. I have been refining them for a while. I am not sure what the purpose of posting them is, other than the fact that I haven't ever written them down or explained them to anybody. So I guess I am checking my own thinking and inviting discussion.
So, here they are. They are roughly hierarchical, which means the higher they appear on the list, the more precedence they have.
1. People are the most important thing in this life, so endeavor to be decent.
Being decent doesn't means being perfect. But it does mean showing empathy and treating others the way you would want to be treated. In Christianity that is what is known as the Golden Rule, but most major religions feature similar teachings. It is more generally known as the Ethic of Reciprocity.
2. Live up to your commitments.
This includes both very simple ideas (do what you say you will do, pay your debts) and slightly more complicated ones. The slightly more complicated version is to fulfill your implicit commitments. Like doing your duty to your spouse to be a good partner, doing your duty to your kids to be a good parent, etc..
3. Seek the truth and embrace reality.
Try to understand what is really happening in the world around you and avoid self-deception. "Seek the truth" may sound high falutin', but it is essential to me in terms of challenging myself to really understand what is really going on and what matters. It can be applied in current events, office politics, family dynamics, or anywhere else. I tend to apply something called "Bayesian thinking" to seeking the truth. In essence, it entails starting with an estimate of the probability that any claim, idea, or hypothesis is true, then continuously updating that estimate as new information becomes available. It is a really useful mental model when applied in an unbiased fashion.
Self-deception is incredibly damaging because it can lead to complacency or, worse still, rationalizing behavior that is self-destructive or harmful to others.
4. Be as honest and direct as possible in your dealings with others.
Honesty is important to me, but I won't pretend that I never tell a lie. Under these principles, "little white lies" are permissible. Because if telling the truth would violate the principle of decency, you shouldn't do it. But lies to avoid living up to your commitments would be prohibited by two principles, so they really aren't okay.
The direct part is more challenging for me, but something I am working on. I grew up in an almost pathologically non-confrontational household and I can say with certainty that acting like that can cause real problems. But directness needn't mean tactlessness. In fact, if being too direct would violate the principle of decency, you shouldn't do it.
That's it. These principles are both simple and flexible. They work for me, but they can be challenging to follow. Though I didn't intend for this to be a political post, I have also found that for me they essentially have replaced having any set ideology.
I have no idea if anybody else will find this interesting, but it is something I have thought a lot about on and off over the last year or so.
ETA: If you are interested in some non-statistical examples of the use of Bayesian thinking, these blog posts are pretty good. Link Link
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