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14 hours ago, NutterButter said:

the people throwing the wedding or the people attending?   is it significantly more than a normal wedding?   we're talking just the wedding itself and the reception.   everything else would be paid for by the guests like room, food and drinks outside of reception hours and flight.   

I've never gone to a destination wedding, they seem obnoxious.  I'd just send a card (and a gift, depending on the relationship).  Otherwise if you expect me to incur all those costs to attend your wedding, my presence is your gift.  

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18 minutes ago, Ignoratio Elenchi said:

I've never gone to a destination wedding, they seem obnoxious.  I'd just send a card (and a gift, depending on the relationship).  Otherwise if you expect me to incur all those costs to attend your wedding, my presence is your gift.  

Unless you only attend ceremonies within driving distance, isn’t every wedding effectively a destination?

I guess most people don’t move/live far from the bulk of their friends/family, but for those of us who do, I hope invitees don’t find the concept obnoxious. Then again, less guests is always better anyway.

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38 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

Unless you only attend ceremonies within driving distance, isn’t every wedding effectively a destination?

I guess most people don’t move/live far from the bulk of their friends/family, but for those of us who do, I hope invitees don’t find the concept obnoxious. Then again, less guests is always better anyway.

I think of "destination wedding" as one which is a destination for the bride and groom.  I live in NJ and have friends in Chicago.  If they get married in Chicago, I'd fly out for their wedding.  That's not a "destination wedding" to me.  If they decide they want to get married on a beach in Hawaii, that's a destination wedding. 

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27 minutes ago, Ignoratio Elenchi said:

I think of "destination wedding" as one which is a destination for the bride and groom.  I live in NJ and have friends in Chicago.  If they get married in Chicago, I'd fly out for their wedding.  That's not a "destination wedding" to me.  If they decide they want to get married on a beach in Hawaii, that's a destination wedding. 

Hmmm. We got married on a beach in HI, but we live here. It was at a resort though, so does it qualify as a destination wedding?

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Just now, Terminalxylem said:

Hmmm. We got married on a beach in HI, but we live here. It was at a resort though, so does it qualify as a destination wedding?

No, if I had friends in Hawaii I'd expect to have to go to Hawaii for their wedding (the specific choice of venue doesn't really matter). If my Chicago friends decided they wanted to get married on a beach in Hawaii, they'd get a card in the mail.  :) 

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3 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

Hmmm. We got married on a beach in HI, but we live here. It was at a resort though, so does it qualify as a destination wedding?

Technically no, but I'd probably still put you down in the exceptions to the rule category.   

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3 minutes ago, Ignoratio Elenchi said:

No, if I had friends in Hawaii I'd expect to have to go to Hawaii for their wedding (the specific choice of venue doesn't really matter). If my Chicago friends decided they wanted to get married on a beach in Hawaii, they'd get a card in the mail.  :) 

As it turns out, most people want to come to HI, so it didn’t seem like much of an issue. I originally suggested a neighbor island venue to cut down on the riff-raff from Oahu, but my wife shot that idea down.

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4 hours ago, Ignoratio Elenchi said:

I've never gone to a destination wedding, they seem obnoxious.  I'd just send a card (and a gift, depending on the relationship).  Otherwise if you expect me to incur all those costs to attend your wedding, my presence is your gift.  

We got married in New Orleans, and it worked great.  Wife's family is from just up the road and we were keeping it pretty small, and I knew my family and close friends would show up.  Most folks showed up on Thursday,  had our wedding party dinner, and then everyone got to tour the city (and partied) on Friday/Friday night.  Saturday was the wedding (more partying after) and then folks left Sunday.  All of my friends are begging to have a do-over so they have a reason to go back and party.

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