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Old Men marrying, dating or just sleeping with women at least one generation younger: 1st up, The Johnsons


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On 5/29/2021 at 7:21 PM, Drunken Cowboy said:

Half your age plus 7.

 

On 5/30/2021 at 5:49 AM, skillz said:

Isn’t the rule still divide by two and add seven to ensure an appropriate age gap?  

 

5 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

I thought the rule was age/2 + 7?

 

How about add your age plus 28 then add your age again and divide that number by 4?

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8 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

Can you elaborate on the bolded? Are you suggested non-drinking men are better equipped to relate to/date younger women? Does drinking make people more mature?

Sure - what is the one thing someone under 21 cannot do?  Go to the bar.  There will always be trust issues when one can go to the bars and the other cannot.  

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Posted (edited)
24 minutes ago, FairWarning said:

Sure - what is the one thing someone under 21 cannot do?  Go to the bar.  There will always be trust issues when one can go to the bars and the other cannot.  

Maybe this reflects my lack of life experience, but I don’t think that’s a big deal at all. If my wife wanted to go to a bar with (female) friends, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. 

If she wanted to go on a camping trip with a bunch of teetotaling guys, I’d be much more concerned.

I actually find myself in a similar situation quite often, as I am friends with many single, young women who climb. My wife doesn’t like climbing. To avoid the potential/appearance of impropriety, I won’t climb alone with the women. But I will go in groups where both genders are included. OTOH, I have no problem if she plays tennis with single men.

Regardless, people will always have the opportunity to be unfaithful, so it’s not worth getting too worked up about it IMO.

Edited by Terminalxylem
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Posted (edited)
28 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

Maybe this reflects my lack of life experience, but I don’t think that’s a big deal at all. If my wife wanted to go to a bar with (female) friends, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. 

If she wanted to go on a camping trip with a bunch of teetotaling guys, I’d be much more concerned.

I actually find myself in a similar situation quite often, as I am friends with many single, young women who climb. My wife doesn’t like climbing. To avoid the potential/appearance of impropriety, I won’t climb alone with the women. But I will go in groups where both genders are included. OTOH, I have no problem if she plays tennis with single men.

Regardless, people will always have the opportunity to be unfaithful, so it’s not worth getting too worked up about it IMO.

The bar gives them one more chance that the other cannot do though.

Edited by FairWarning
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41 minutes ago, FairWarning said:

The bar gives them one more chance that the other cannot do though.

So you’d be more concerned about the bar than camping trip?

While alcohol in any setting increases your chance of doing something stupid, being alone for prolonged periods with potential suitors is far more concerning. The likelihood of infidelity is more a function of opportunity and desire than intoxication IMO.

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8 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

So you’d be more concerned about the bar than camping trip?

While alcohol in any setting increases your chance of doing something stupid, being alone for prolonged periods with potential suitors is far more concerning. The likelihood of infidelity is more a function of opportunity and desire than intoxication IMO.

In general, yes.  I’ve seen it too many times from working in a bar.  Just curious, would your wife let you take a weekend to a Vegas with the boys (assuming you wanted to and could go)?

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1 hour ago, FairWarning said:

In general, yes.  I’ve seen it too many times from working in a bar.  Just curious, would your wife let you take a weekend to a Vegas with the boys (assuming you wanted to and could go)?

Absolutely. In fact, I've taken several week-long trips there. I even lost my wedding ring on one of the trips. 😲

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6 hours ago, playin4beer said:

I have (4) daughters.. I have no desire to have a fifth.. IE: a young wife

The woman is in her 30s here. 

3 hours ago, Terminalxylem said:

Maybe this reflects my lack of life experience, but I don’t think that’s a big deal at all. If my wife wanted to go to a bar with (female) friends, I wouldn’t give it a second thought. 

If she wanted to go on a camping trip with a bunch of teetotaling guys, I’d be much more concerned.

I actually find myself in a similar situation quite often, as I am friends with many single, young women who climb. My wife doesn’t like climbing. To avoid the potential/appearance of impropriety, I won’t climb alone with the women. But I will go in groups where both genders are included. OTOH, I have no problem if she plays tennis with single men.

Regardless, people will always have the opportunity to be unfaithful, so it’s not worth getting too worked up about it IMO.

It has less to do with trust and more to do with conflict. When it's Saturday and you want to go out to the bar but she can't go, it's an easy spot for conflict to arise. 

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Posted (edited)
8 minutes ago, Ilov80s said:

It has less to do with trust and more to do with conflict. When it's Saturday and you want to go out to the bar but she can't go, it's an easy spot for conflict to arise. 

It depends why she can't go - if she's taking care of the kids or doing chores while you're getting your drink on, conflict is understandable. If she has a competing engagement or responsibility you can't attend/assist, I wouldn't expect any problems.

I guess there's also the phenomenon of maximizing one's free time with the sig O regardless, but I think that's suitable for its own topic.

Edited by Terminalxylem
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Posted (edited)
7 minutes ago, Terminalxylem said:

It depends why she can't go - if she's taking care of the kids or doing chores while you're getting your drink on, conflict is understandable. If she has a competing engagement or responsibility you can't attend/assist, I wouldn't expect any problems.

I guess there's also the phenomenon of maximizing one's free time with the sig O regardless, but I think that's suitable for its own topic.

Sorry maybe I should have replied earlier up stream. The convo was about the perils of dating when 1 person is 21 and the other isn't. I see it did evolve into something else. I am strictly referring the way the bar becomes a point of contention when a 21-22 year old is dating a 19-20 year old. 

Edited by Ilov80s
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17 minutes ago, Ilov80s said:

Sorry maybe I should have replied earlier up stream. The convo was about the perils of dating when 1 person is 21 and the other isn't. I see it did evolve into something else. I am strictly referring the way the bar becomes a point of contention when a 21-22 year old is dating a 19-20 year old. 

This is why fake IDs were invented

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Just now, acarey50 said:

This is why fake IDs were invented

Sure but fake IDs have been much more difficult to make in the last 20 years. What you really need is someone who is 21 to give you their ID and go to the DMV/Sec of State to get a new one by reporting theirs lost. 

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1 hour ago, Terminalxylem said:

Absolutely. In fact, I've taken several week-long trips there. I even lost my wedding ring on one of the trips. 😲

Ouch lol.  

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31 minutes ago, Ilov80s said:

Sure but fake IDs have been much more difficult to make in the last 20 years. What you really need is someone who is 21 to give you their ID and go to the DMV/Sec of State to get a new one by reporting theirs lost. 

That will be tough in Mich now that the SoS is appointment only now.

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Posted (edited)
40 minutes ago, Ilov80s said:

Sure but fake IDs have been much more difficult to make in the last 20 years. What you really need is someone who is 21 to give you their ID and go to the DMV/Sec of State to get a new one by reporting theirs lost. 

From what I've heard, fake IDs are ridiculously easy to get online.

Edited by WDIK2
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13 minutes ago, WDIK2 said:

From what I've heard, fake IDs are ridiculously easy to get online.

That’s possible. Wasn’t when around 2000. Also requires the other person to be willing to use one. My GF at the time wasn’t. 

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1 hour ago, Ilov80s said:

Sorry maybe I should have replied earlier up stream. The convo was about the perils of dating when 1 person is 21 and the other isn't. I see it did evolve into something else. I am strictly referring the way the bar becomes a point of contention when a 21-22 year old is dating a 19-20 year old. 

Pretty much any 19-20 year old who wants a fake id can get one. 

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1 hour ago, Ilov80s said:

Sure but fake IDs have been much more difficult to make in the last 20 years. What you really need is someone who is 21 to give you their ID and go to the DMV/Sec of State to get a new one by reporting theirs lost. 

I see this has already been discussed - yes, it is very easy to get fake ids. 

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12 minutes ago, bigbottom said:

I see this has already been discussed - yes, it is very easy to get fake ids. 

that’s good, an improvement from my era in the early 2000s. Wasn’t difficult exactly then but we had several taken and then it cost money to get a new one and some were nervous to use one. 

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On 5/29/2021 at 5:42 PM, Ministry of Pain said:

Someone has established adulthood for a young lady at 21, is that fair?

Society has decided, in all 50 states, that adulthood with respect to sexual agency is 18.  Once there are two adults in a consensual relationship I don't care what they do behind closed doors.

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Me (52) and my girlfriend (26) went out to eat at a restaurant.  I got called all kinds of nasty names like creep, perv, etc.

 

It really ruined our 10th anniversary. 

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Only somewhat related, but when I was 29 years old, I had an amzing weekend of sleeping with an 18 year old on one night, and a 40 year old on the other. Not quite the 20+ year difference of Boris, but if you add up the 11 on either end...

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8 hours ago, the moops said:

Only somewhat related, but when I was 29 years old, I had an amzing weekend of sleeping with an 18 year old on one night, and a 40 year old on the other. Not quite the 20+ year difference of Boris, but if you add up the 11 on either end...

What was a better night?

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17 hours ago, the moops said:

Only somewhat related, but when I was 29 years old, I had an amzing weekend of sleeping with an 18 year old on one night, and a 40 year old on the other. Not quite the 20+ year difference of Boris, but if you add up the 11 on either end...

Mother/Daughter combo?

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I don’t think it’s that big of a deal provided the parties are legal, although it  can be a little weird. I lived in an apartment in college and was friends with a girl that lived with her dad (50’s) in the neighboring apartment. I also was friends with her BFF (19), who the father started dating. 

One problem was the dad somehow was the Energizer bunny and would go at it for hours. Imagine the bedroom scene from The Secret of My Success. His bedroom was next to my bedroom and they were . . . loud. The whole situation made it difficult to be friends with the girls. 

Also interesting that so far all the discussion has been about older men with much younger women. Does that mean older women with much younger men is accepted and no one cares?

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On 5/29/2021 at 6:22 PM, Encyclopedia Brown said:

I heard Carrie wasn't all that impressed with Boris at the start but then they ordered a pizza and Boris nailed the measurement on the first try..

Then she was smitten. 

I wonder what kind of pizza;)

 

Edited by notoriousbill
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10 hours ago, Anarchy99 said:

Also interesting that so far all the discussion has been about older men with much younger women. Does that mean older women with much younger men is accepted and no one cares?

Of course it is and of course they don't, that's not part of the Patriarchy.

Edited by Dez89
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On 6/8/2021 at 7:16 PM, the moops said:

Only somewhat related, but when I was 29 years old, I had an amzing weekend of sleeping with an 18 year old on one night, and a 40 year old on the other. Not quite the 20+ year difference of Boris, but if you add up the 11 on either end...

Which one was better?

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